The first day of her new life was far from what she was expecting. She had finally had the courage to stand up to her grandmother and declare her independence. Standing alone in her small studio she began to think of the things in the past few months that had lead her to this moment in her life. When Lucky died in August she thought that her life was over, and honestly her life was, this life she was living still didn't feel like hers. She should be in New York right now painting while Lucky played her another song he had written. She still felt like a shell of a person some days, but today, today was a good day. She had finally reached her limit of pity. Everyone was so consumed with her feelings that it seemed as if they were suffocating her. She just wanted to breathe.
"Well Elizabeth Webber, What now?" she pondered out loud "Your finally out on your own, finally doing what you want."
Looking at her watch she know exactly what she was going to do. Run. If she didn't she was going to be late for her shift as Kelly's. Now with her paying her own way she was definitely going to have to make sure she didn't get fired from her waitressing job.
Flying throw the door to Kelly's she made it with a minute to spare.
"Cutting it close today aren't we" Tammy laughed seeing her replacement leaning on the counter out of breath.
"At least I made it on time and didn't break my neck doing it" Liz said as she went behind the counter to get her apron on. " How was your shift? Busy?"
"Not even a little, think I read the entire newspaper twice, but hey the place is so clean you wont have much to do when you close tonight."
"Great" She had been hoping that it would be a busy night so that when she got off she would just want to lay down and go to sleep and not think about being alone for the first time in a long while. She only hoped that every little sound she heard didn't scare the crap out of her although she knew that it probably would.
"Well she you tomorrow girlie, have a good night" Tammy said as she walked out the door a little over a hour later that was being held open for her by the last person that Elizabeth wanted to see right now, Nikolas Cassadine.
"Hey Nik, what can I get for ya" Liz said as he made his way to the front counter.
"Just came by to see how you are doing, make sure that you have everything that you need at your new place"
"I'm doing good and I'm set, so don't worry yourself about me, coffee maybe?" She smiled looking to the door in hopes that god was listening and a mob of people would be coming through now, no such luck. Looking back to Nik who was shaking his head no her smile began to fade and her eyes headed for the counter. It was to hard now a days for her to look at people in the eyes and keep her smile going. She absently take the wet cloth laying there and started to clean the already clean counter. He didn't even seem to notice anything was wrong as she began to hum to herself Lucky and hers song.
"Ok, well I was going to go to the mall tomorrow afternoon and I know that's usually your day off, so if you need to get anything you should come along, get out for a while, some place besides work." Nik had placed his hand over hers forcing her to stop wiping up nothing.
The perfect smile that she would fake for all her friends and family came back to her face as she looked at Nik " Maybe, I don't know. I was thinking of trying to paint on my day off, finish up some of the things I have started."
"Well let me know and I'll come by and pick you up." He slipped off his stool and headed back to the door headed out, " I hope you come Liz, it will be good for you" he said as walked out the door.
"Good for me?" she said when she saw that he was no longer in sight, " Good for me? And of course you would know what's good for me, you all seem to always now what's good for me" walking around the counter to check the sugar on all the tables she continued to mutter to herself not even hearing the bell to the door or notice the man standing just in the door way.
" I don't need any of you telling me what's good for me, you wanna know what's good for me, nothing, nothing, just leave me alone don't keep making me feel like I shouldn't feel like I feel, ughhhh" she said turning now to face the tall blond that had enter during her rant.
"Should I go?" Jason said to the now blood red brunette.
"No! Sorry I didn't see you there. Oh God I feel like a idiot. You must think that I am some kind of crazy person don't you?"
"No I don't." He said with a look a concern for the young girl he had last seen sitting on the crib in front of his burned down garage with tear stained cheeks. "You ok?"
"Yeah im fine, just a moment of insanity really, but I sure that its pasted now" she said willing herself to believe the words that she know where a lie leaving her lips. "Please have a seat where ever you would like, the pickings are good tonight." she said looking into his cerulean eyes.
Walking to the counter she followed while he sat and she went back behind. " What can I get for you?"
"Coffee and the truth, you don't seem fine." He eyes searched hers like he could see straight throw her, the look causing her to feel chills run up her spine.
"Is it really that obvious?" she asked as she poured him a cup of coffee and placed it in front of him. "I must really be off my game if even someone who doesn't know me picks up on it."
"It's pretty easy to see it right now, guess you don't think you have to hide it from me since you don't know me."
"Maybe, but I do know you, or at least know of you. Your Emily's big brother, I met you at the boxcar with Lucky once, and…."
"You heard all the rumors." He finished for her.
"Yeah, but you seem like a nice guy, can't believe everything you hear you know?"
"That you can't. So tell me, what's wrong?"
"Well, everyone just wants what is good for me, I know that they mean well and all but I wish they would just let me deal with finding what is best for me on my own. I love my friends and my family but they really don't have any idea what I need. And if I hear 'I know what your going through' one more time I am gonna lose it, they don't know. They know how they feel about everything not how I feel, everyone feels different and that just seems like a concept that they can't comprehend." It felt so good for her to say that out loud to someone it felt like the one hundred pound weight that she carried around was her was falling away.
"I don't know what your going through, I know how I felt when I had to give Michael up, even though he is still breathing it hurts like he isn't to me."
"Lucky is gone now and nothing is going to bring him back or make it hurt any less, and every time I admit this to myself its like it's the first time and I have to learn it all over again." Her tears began to roll down her cheeks now and placing his hand on the side of her face uses his thumb to wipe away a tear. Unconsciously she turn her face into his hand closing her eyes and relishing the touch.
"Sometimes things are too big to get through all at once, you know they happen fast, but you just got to live through them real slow." He says as she opens her eyes and looks at him. Unbeknownst to them Carly has seen all she can stand of her Jason as she walks away from the front window to Kelly's and down the back alley.
Pulling away from his touch she grabs for the coffee pot to refill his cup and tries to collect herself. It had been so long since anyone had touched and had her react in that way that she didn't quite know what was happening.
As he brought the fresh cup up to his lips he couldn't understand what had gotten into him that made him want to touch her, something about the beautiful girl in front of him made him almost weak in the knees. He knew that she was still in pain about the loss of her boyfriend but he couldn't help but want to be the reason that she finally let him go.
Looking over at the clock on the wall she realized that time was flying by and yet she had only seen two people here besides Tammy her entire shift. It was getting close to closing time already just a little long and she could go home. Home, her home, her home alone. Alone, definitely not one of her favorite words.
"You want to do something with me? It wont take long, you just look like you need to get away for a little bit, I have a little time before I have to be anywhere and a ride sounds like a good idea."
"I could close a little earlier, everything is done around here anyway. Where to?"
"Nowhere, come on." He watched as she placed her apron under the counter and came around to follow him out the door.
Walking around the corner and she sees that he wasn't speaking of a car ride but instead…"A motorcycle ride?"
"Yeah, you'll like it, just hold on tight and yell if ya want me to slow down." He says placing the helmet on the top of her head and slides on holding his hand out to help her on the back. " Trust me."
And she did. Taking his hand she got on and placed her arms around his muscular frame.
"You ready?" Is the last thing she heard before he took off and the sound of the wind drowned out everything else, even her own mind.