Disclaimer: I'm sure you're all more than aware that I don't own any characters.
AU, and more pointless smut ^_^
Joker was smashed that that had to be the reason because there was no way he would be all over him like this (Though with only three shots of tequila and Jokers high alcohol tolerance he wasn't so sure). They were best friends and Shepard was sure best friends don't straddle their best friend's lap (well maybe there's really no such thing as personal space when it comes to them) and pepper kisses over their neck (That could be seen as more than friendly right?). At least in Shepard's world they don't but who knows Ashley is always telling him how he lives in his own world sometimes. It wasn't like he didn't enjoy the attention, in fact it was quite the opposite and if this wasn't joker he wouldn't think twice about pounding his friend's ass till said friend lost feeling in their lower body for the next few days. It's just Its Joker he's talking about.
Joker who just figured out the love of his life was cheating on him (Shepard never did like that bitch). Joker who came to his apartment looking a mess with his crumpled dress shirt, blood shot eyes and hopeless expression on his face. Shepard could sympathize. He could imagine himself looking the same way if the woman he was going to propose to was cheating on him with her ex-boyfriend, who she claimed to never want to see again.
Of course seeing Joker in this state Nico did the only thing he knew how to do when his or his friends' mood sucked, a shoulder to lean on and a shot of tequila (which quickly went from 1 to 2 to 6 as he explained his foul mood).
"I can't believe she would do that to me! She hates that fucker, he abused her and I was here to take care of her when no one else cared and that's how she repays me by going back and sucking that assholes dick!"
Nico knew it was wrong but a part of him cheered mentally that that bitch made such a stupid mistake. How could she ever even have the idea of being with someone else when she had such an amazing man to herself? Shit if he was with Joker, Shepard's dick would never leave his ass stopping anyone but themselves from getting the chance to look at each other and making the idea of cheating impossible.
"At least I have you Nico; I couldn't imagine anyone else willing to put up with me being such a pussy right now." As he said this he leaned over towards Shepard's side of the couch and was instantly taken into a loving embrace by the larger man. Shepard kissed the top of the man's short hair and Joker buried his face into his neck releasing a relaxed sigh. The silence was comfortable and Nico took his time enjoying the feeling of the smaller man's warm body against his own. He was shocked when Joker slid over and firmly planted himself into his lap (Goddamnit let his dick stay soft). Their relationship was always very intimate and though they were both interested in one another neither acted on it, the friendship was always just that a friendship. (Obviously tonight was a different story.)
Shepard was struggling, he understood that he should be a good friend and it would be so wrong (But feel oh so right!) to let his hands travel to the taut globes of his friends ass cheeks and take advantage of him while he was in this vulnerable state. But fuck, he was only human and humans only had so much control (Plus Joker isn't stupid he had to feel his hard cock against his ass by now), so with that logic he felt slightly less like a total douchebag when his hands sunk into the muscular flesh and massaged it between his fingertips. He was pretty sure he'd made the right decision when he received an encouraging moan and hips being thrust down into his in return. The friction against his clothed cock made his vision cloudy. Jeff leaned his head up and put his hands on either side of Shepard's face and Nico wasted no time connecting their mouths. He sucked greedily on Joker's lips; grateful that the kiss was returned full force and relishing in the moans he received as a result from the double stimulation of the other man (mmm Joker's ass is sensitive). They continued thrusting against one another and Shepard ripped open Joker's dress shirt, letting his hands explore the furred chest, pinching a nipple in the process.
Joker broke from the kiss and let out a deep groan that went straight to Nico's cock. The larger man quickly replaced his finger with his tongue, flicking the erect bud and lightly nipping on it making Jeff groan louder and fling his head back in the process. Shepard, still wanting more, laid Joker down on the cushion of the couch and continued to explore the rest of his body, dropping kisses from one nipple to the other then descending to his navel. He leaned back up and locked lips with Jeff again wasting no time sliding his tongue into the other's mouth this time, swirling them together while working on undoing the smaller man's belt. When his job was finished he wasted no time pulling down both the pants and boxers in one swoop and broke the kiss to pepper kisses down the length of his lover's gorgeous cock (by far the most beautiful he'd ever seen).
He stopped and sucked on of Jeff's balls into his mouth and flicked his eyes up to him when he let out a shameless moan of pleasure. 'God he's sexy,' his bearded face was flushed and his eyes were shut tight with his mouth open moaning unintelligibly. Shepard reached for his ankles raising them and lowering his face still until his eyes locked with his clenching hole.
"Fuck you want my cock badly don't you" he muttered as he flattened his tongue against his tight taint and lowered his boxers so he could reach his own cock and stroke it as he heard Jeff let out a high-pitched whine. He lazily flicked his tongue around the crinkled skin and spit on it as lube to prep him. He sucked on his finger and slid it inside him while he worked his tongue in as well. Joker thrust himself upwards and let out his loudest moan yet. He was positive his neighbors would complain but he didn't give a damn. Shepard leaned up and licked a wet line from Jeff's balls to the tip of his cock while he added another finger to his hole. By now, Joker could barely contain himself; he was practically screaming NIco's name and begging for his cock to be in him.
"Just a little longer I promise I don't want to hurt you." And Shepard delivered adding a third finger and lifting Jeff's ankles up so they could sit on his shoulders. Nico leaned forward until Jeff's knees touched his chest and worked up saliva into his mouth so he could get his cock wet. After he spit in his hand he shuddered as he stroked himself and took one last look at Joker's flustered beautiful face before he braced his hands on the arm of the couch and slid inside him. Joker's face scrunched as he bore with the pain of taking Nico's impressive cock into his ass. He slid deeper and deeper until he was ball deep into the smaller man. He gave him time to adjust before pulling out almost to the tip and thrusting back in. Joker gasped and threw his head back as he reached for his cock to finish himself off.
Shepard would have none of that and before he could reach it gripped his cock harshly and Joker threw his head back hands going limp and whimpered. He felt every inch of Shepard impale him and strike his prostate dead on with each thrust. He was so close damnit! Why didn't Nico let him finish himself off! His thought process stopped as Nico thrust hard and fast into him assaulting his prostate and making him choke on a moan as he came hard, rope after rope of cum covering his chest and Shepard's chest and hand. Nico followed right behind him, gripping his hips and slamming into him until he coated the insides of his hole with his cum. Shepard groaned long and low and fell forward burying his face in Joker's neck. He slipped out of him kissing his cheek in apology for the pained groan he caused to erupt from the smaller man and sat up leaning back pulling Joker down onto his chest. Joker sighed when Shepard wrapped one arm around his back and the other lower down so the larger man could reach his finger into his ass and scoop his cum onto the digit and into his mouth.
"Fuck we taste good" moaned Shepard and Joker connected their mouths to see what he and Nico tasted like together. The kiss was slow and sweet, giving them the chance to enjoy one another.
"You're always here for me Nico, I don't know what I would do without you," Stated joker breaking the kiss. "You don't ever have to think about that because I will always be here." He promised locking their fingers.