A/N: I don't read the manga, so I apologize for any inaccuracies.
Even in his sleep, he could smell it; hear it.
At first, a stunning blast of air, followed by the din of men scurrying about like frightened little rats, either to rush to their homes to kiss their wives and children or as an attempt to find out what the matter was, and finally, he knows he's skipping some parts but finally, a terrible, terrible silence, broken by absolutely nothing, as an unwanted shadow loomed above the town he had once called home.
The hideous thing stared at the tiny constellation of houses and markets and its still, quiet occupants, as if appraising how hard a blow would wipe the whole town out of existence.
Its name would be buried deep in the debris and rubble that once upon a time took the form of closely packed houses and narrow streets and soothing warmth, forever remembered as the beginning of a vast human tragedy.
And then, in a graceless but somehow swift motion, the thing smashed its foot through the town's caging, protective wall, and any semblance of peace was shattered in an instant.
Wind. More wind, but this time it was much more severe, to the extent where members of the formerly proud race were blown away into the air, weak, vulnerable plastic bags to be tossed and humiliated at the breeze's will.
And then, another scurry, and he barely realized with a vague sense of horror that he was going against the flood of people, and for a second he had forgotten why, the memory of something warm and gentle and comforting moving him along.
His brain skips over what happens next, giving him only blurry fragments and an awful feeling of helplessness as he was carried away from that good woman whom he had failed to save, but that does not mean he had forgotten.
He remembers. Eren remembers, all too well.
He would wake up gasping in the dead of night, cold and alone (save for the other cadets stuffed into the same room as him, but they were sleeping and unaware and as such he considered himself alone), but not surprised in any way; nights undisturbed by this occurrence were a rare blessing.
Except this night, the room wasn't as tiny, he had fewer roommates, he was a cadet no longer, and he wasn't the only one awake.
It had taken him more than a moment to reach the realization, and when he finally did, he did not flinch back in fear; assailants were unheard of here. Besides, though the room was illuminated by nothing but a faint beam of moonlight, that proud posture and that air of importance and that ever-meticulous appearance (now slightly disheveled by sleep) were hard to mistake for someone else.
And as soon as it hit him, so did the mortification.
Something like this had never happened before. Normally, he'd wake up and calm himself down and, if he was lucky, drift back into sleep. Normally, he'd go unnoticed. Normally–
Then again, Levi was anything but normal.
A stretch of silence fell upon them and lasted too long, and while Eren was looking around to make sure no one else had woken up, he felt something hit the mattress next to his feet.
"Gather yourself," was what Levi had finally said to break the thick silence, voice low and quiet so as not to wake those around them.
Eren stayed quiet, opting to stare at the small box of tissues at the other end of the bunk bed rather than the man standing so imposingly there.
Eventually, he understood the meaning of the gesture, reaching up to touch his face and finding that it was rather hot and moist. The humiliation swept over him, and he felt more mortified now than ever before, as he slowly reached for a tissue and tried his best to keep his face away from Levi's sight as an attempt to retain some sort of dignity.
As if he had any left.
More silence, and then Levi leaned in very slightly, almost imperceptibly, so that his face was in full view, no longer partially hidden by the bed frame above.
"You'll have to get used to it," was his second statement, and, as embarrassed as he was, Eren could not help looking up.
"What do you mean, sir?" he croaked.
He wasn't sure whether he regretted looking right then or not, but either way, he thought noticed a glint, a strange look in Levi's eyes, a vague sort of desperation, almost, but it had vanished as soon as it had come, and he was left wondering whether he had only imagined it.
"That," Levi said, and his voice was strange. "You'll have them for many years to come, if you're willing to be a soldier."
Eren was not sure of what to say or how to say it, but eventually, he replied with a question he couldn't help but ask.
"Like you do?"
Levi looked unaffected by the question and after a few seconds' thought, scoffed, and said, "Don't worry about me."
And then Levi was gone, bathed in darkness, as abruptly and subtly as he had come, without another word, returning to his own bunk bed.
Eren was left to toss about restlessly, the odd words slithering through his mind until morning came.