A/N: This is the original version of the third ficlet in the series, First Times: Spock. For many reasons, it didn't fit the series. It has no beta influence save a note that it was too long, too convoluted and didn't feature enough misdirection. It's also not very funny. But, since I wrote it, I figured I'd post it. If nothing else, it serves as a comparison to the final product. And as a cautionary tale about stories that get out of hand.
All species featured in this fic are Trek canon. Vedalans are a felid species first seen in Star Trek: The Animated Series. Halanans first appeared in Deep Space Nine.
Disclaimer: I own no Star Trek concepts or characters and I don't make money from writing about them.
"S'chn T'gai Spohk."
Her voice, deeper, and yet more sensual than any other he'd heard in a humanoid female, turned his name into a caress. Spock felt his temperature rise; perspiration, an inheritance from his human mother, broke out over his skin.
She continued to watch him, her eyes never leaving his face, although she left off trying to hold his gaze. Then she smiled.
His heart rate increased fifteen percent. He struggled to regulate his respiration.
"My name is Fiyell."
Fiyell smiled like she did.
Almost without forethought, he reached towards the hand she offered.
.
.
"Enterprise Ethics" were entirely subjective and frequently in compliance with neither the Starfleet Code of Conduct nor the United Federation of Planets Concordance of 2197.
Hence, they were quite often not, it could go without saying, in accord with fundamental Vulcan mores.
Though it had taken a great deal of effort (on the parts of Lieutenant Uhura, Doctor McCoy and, occasionally, Captain Kirk, as well as his own), Spock had been resigned to the idea for two point two years by the time they entered orbit around the Vedala asteroid.
That, he later decided, was how he would explain the incident should his future children ever enquire, as their future mother assured him they would.
.
.
Hours earlier…
She didn't offer her name and members of the away team had been briefed not to ask. Understated but unmistakable, the majesty she projected was in no way hindered by quiet voice or stooped posture. She was clearly a leader; her authority wasn't in question.
She did not flaunt her power, but the Enterprise crewmembers seemed to recognize it, Spock observed. And, at the very least, all those assembled appeared to acknowledge and respect it.
Everyone, that is, except for Jim and Leonard. The scientist in Spock considered his improved proficiency in reading human facial expressions; the Vulcan/human hybrid who now called them both "friend" was embarrassed for his two colleagues.
The captain stared at the felid female with open carnal admiration. This was not unexpected; unlike his counterpart from universe they would likely never see, this James Tiberius Kirk did not limit his appreciation of forms and faces to those which were predominantly humanoid.
Spock doubted his friend would find success there, but refused to say anything. Jim would likely learn for himself, soon enough.
He glanced at Lieutenant Uhura in time to catch the minute narrowing of her eyes. With a brief, resigned smile, she indicated their captain with a tilt of her head, then gave a gave it the slightest negative shake.
The Vedalan words drew his attention back to their hostess.
"It is our hope that one of you will succeed where we have not," she said. "While in many instances, our physicians are without match in healing minds, this particular case has proven beyond our means. Some among us have posited that the answer might not lie in medicine, while others believe our patient could benefit from the science of others."
She paused to study the group.
"Most of you gathered here have been selected to test one or the other theory," she continued. Then her gaze went around her guests, falling on a single member of each delegation, Nyo– Lieutenant Uhura, that is, among them. "The rest of you are also welcome."
He turned his eyes — and mind — from the woman who had once represented his future, finding the ship's surgeon, instead. McCoy still watched the Vedalan with something bordering on adulation. Despite his frequent insistence that he wanted nothing more than to be an "old country doctor", on many occasions, during otherwise unrelated discussions, he'd referenced the first known space-faring race and of their altruistic efforts throughout the galaxy.
"Goin' around, half-cocked, like they're half Peace Corps, half-Médecins Sans Frontières or some such," he'd often said of the Vedalans. Those who knew him well saw past the surface disdain to the esteem the doctor tried to hide behind one of his favorite maledictions.
Now, faced with a member of the race he idolized, Leonard couldn't cloak his desire for approval in feigned vitriol or indifference.
"Now that you have some understanding of our dilemma," the Vedalan told them cryptically, "I ask that you join me in a reception where you will greet our patient. It is our hope that one among you will be able to provide an answer to the… difficulties."
Spock hoped his friend would not end up disappointed with the long-coveted encounter. Disappointment was an emotion the supposedly unemotional scientist knew all too well.
.
.
Back in the Hall…
According to what was considered "common knowledge", the Vedalans were not a prideful people. But Spock, who had better reason than most to know that common knowledge often consisted of what Leonard called "a big ol' load of hogwash", still wondered pride might be the reason behind the choice of how they introduced their patient to members of the three delegations.
None of those first presented to the Halanan woman were trained in medicine. All were male.
And she was… exceedingly attractive.
From his place at one of the two long tables situated at right angles to the dais dominating the banquet hall, Spock watched his captain's face as he met the Vedalan's pretty patient. He saw Jim's gaze discreetly take in the woman's dark, curving brows, her double points of her ears, and unblemished skin the color of aged Bahun'ahb wood at sunrise.
Skin like hers.
Jim turned, his glance moving from his science offer to his communications chief.
Nyota.
Spock denied himself the pleasure of looking at the woman seated to his left. He refused to allow thoughts of what he had had and lost cloud his assessment of his captain's diplomatic performance. This James T. Kirk, unlike the man who'd borne the name in another universe, still had something to prove. This Jim needed his friends to help him prove it.
The Vedalans' expectations were unclear, but it was obvious from the way their shoulders slumped further with each introduction that they were disappointed. The last of the foreign males left the dais, and the entire company waited in silence.
When beckoned, Spock approached. Only when all of the second group was assembled, did he notice they possessed telepathy of some sort.
The Lumerian female recused herself almost immediately, claiming, "There is a way among my people, but I don't know if it would work with someone of another race. Besides, it could not be accomplished without damaging the healer…"
The Vedalans assured her such a sacrifice would not be necessary.
The Betazoid was similarly of no help; while he could assess the problem, there was, he said, "…sadly, nothing I can do to alleviate her trouble."
Spock wondered what these others knew that he did not, but realized he would not find out unless he... touched the beautiful woman now watching him hungrily.
.
.
Jim hid a smile from the rest of the room. Bones barely looked up from the PADD gripped in his hands.
More for me, Jim thought, taking note of the many attractive faces dotting the room.
He wondered if his friend had even noticed the guest of honor, so to speak, was so hot she should have come with a warning label.
He wondered if anyone else was wondering if she was what Spock and Uhura's daughters would look like one day. If that hadn't, you know, ripped out their own hearts in the name of anti-extinction efforts.
Damn. All at once, Kirk wondered if Bones had the right idea. Oblivion suddenly felt preferable to wondering.
.
.
He didn't see the Nyota-like smile as he abruptly turned away and addressed his hosts. He missed the way misery spread across her lovely features once again.
"What is my purpose here?" he asked the Vedalans, as much to distract himself from memories he did not welcome as to get an answer.
.
.
Uhura watched Spock struggle with the choices he'd been given. No one else would notice, she realized. At least, no one among the non-telepaths. But she noticed. And she even though she was nearly psi-null, she knew exactly what he was thinking.
Eyes sliding around the hall, searching desperately for something, anything that might prove to be a solution to his — and, to be perfectly honest, her own — dilemma — she felt her heart begin to unclench when she spied Len scribbling furiously on a PADD, oblivious to the drama playing out on stage. The satisfied quirk of his lips as he rested his stylus very nearly clenched her decision.
But is was the open smiles of the Ullian contingent that sealed it for her.
.
.
Under normal circumstances, Spock was confident in his ability to process multiple pieces of information at once. At the moment, he found it nearly impossible to sort out only three facts:
He could not assist — or even attempt to assess — the beautiful Halanan without engaging in the deepest intimacy a Vulcan would ever experience.
The High Council had left it up to the Vedalans to inform him he'd been deemed unsuitable for breeding purposes.
And if none of those their hosts had brought to their asteroid could help, Fiyell would die. And New Halana would not prosper.
In one breath they offered a freedom he hadn't dared hope fore; in the next, they proved that freedom was an illusion.
"I cannot gauge the nature of Fiyell's infirmity without employing a particularly… private act with her," he'd admitted to the female who had first greeted them in the forest clearing. "Based on what little knowledge I have of Halanans, and of their similarities and differences to Vulcans, I believe that taking such action might result in the formation of a permanent connection between us. Because my race is nearly extinct, that is a risk I cannot take."
As the Vedalan female explained the Council's decision, Nyota's gasp had been inaudible to all but him.
"If Fiyell is not saved, her people will also be destroyed," the Vedalan told them all, as the topic of their conversation continued to watch Spock. "As there is no longer anything to impede you—"
How could he deny another being life? The price was no more than the one he'd already agreed to pay. Spock could feel his nemesis's presence behind him: this woman who made heart beat rapidly while reducing his breathing to shallow gasps. Who made a fine sheen of sweat coat his skin. A woman whose uncommon beauty shouldn't matter, but whose importance to her people shouldn't be ignored.
Decision made, he turned to her.
.
Uhura rose from her seat and walked towards the dais.
"My most generous hosts," she said gravely, and offered a slight bow, "please forgive my interruption." She glanced behind her, and then across the room before stepping forward again. "Before Commander Spock takes irrevocable action, which will cause him to renege on an obligation, and which could affect your honored guest even more adversely than her current circumstances, perhaps you would be willing to first consider the remaining alternatives?"
.
.
Three days later, back on the Enterprise…
He hadn't invited them to his quarters, but didn't ask them to leave right away. If he'd accurately assessed his situation — and he was quite good at evaluating circumstances — the moment his unwanted guests were gone, the only one he wanted there would make him question the logic in that desire.
"I guess it all worked out for the best in the end," Jim said, shifting in Spock's desk chair, then crossing his legs. "To be honest, though, I don't know that I could have said 'no' if they didn't say it for me."
Spock only just suppressed a frown. The captain looked far too comfortable where he was. It did not help that Nyota's perch on Spock's desk gave the other man a close view of her person.
Jealousy is irrational, Spock reminded himself. Jealousy of Jim Kirk borders on the insane.
Leonard, leaning against door, reading — for what Spock knew to be at least the fourth time — the notes detailing the process by which he and the Ullian delegates cured Fiyell, snorted.
Nyota rolled her eyes, saying, "They mate for life, Captain. And stress can kill them. Would you really want something like that on your conscience?"
"Well, there's mating and then there's mating. Know what I mean?"
She glared at the wriggling eyebrows and said, "I try not to think about what you mean, half the time."
Then she ruined her rebuke by laughing.
"You see, Jim Boy," Leonard cut in just as Jim uttered the first words of what would doubtless be an inappropriate retort, "it's only when you get your mind out of the gutter long enough to look beyond the surface that you accomplish truly great things."
The doctor looked up from his PADD. Finally. "Take right now. I'm lookin' beneath the surface, and what I'm seein' is if you and me don't leave these two alone and soon, we'd be smart to watch our backs for, oh, I'd say 'bout a month or two."
Although he laughed at the exaggerated accent and accused Leonard of wanting to leave so that he could start writing his report on his new treatment (which was probably partly true), Jim stood, and after a long stretch, finally joined the doctor at the door.
"Don't do anything I would do," he warned, eliciting another laugh from Nyota as the two men took their leave.
Spock only nodded, still not trusting himself to speak.
As soon as they were alone, she threw herself onto his sofa. Eyes closed, sighed heavily.
"Instead of lying, you should have let me handle it," she admonished gently. He knew she wasn't truly displeased with him, if the small hands and long, slender fingers caressing his scalp were fair indicators. "You can't regret what you were unable to prevent."
"Regret is a wasteful emotion," he reminded her, and leaned back into her touch, granting her better access. "Even were it not, I would not regret the result of my actions.
"Though I had another solution in mind — one which, incidentally, you also offered — in this instance, dissembling provided a concrete benefit, one that outweighs any philosophical desirability of granting our questioners the full truth. Deciding to prevaricate would have been logical; however—"
"I lied. You backed me up. That means you lied, too."
"You didn't lie, ashal-veh," he said. "And in supporting your implication, I merely anticipated the truth. I did promise to offer myself to you should my father's people reject my… contribution to the rebuilding efforts. Even if I never informed you of that obligation, it still existed."
Nyota smiled, shaking her head.
"You lied, Spock," she insisted. "We both did. I hope you can live with that."
He gave her one of his rare full smiles. From the way his cheeks muscles stretched, he suspected it was very nearly a grin.
"If it means living with you, I believe I can accept both our actions."