Spoilers: Flight Of The Phoenix

Fallen

I watch her, as I always do. I realise I have convinced myself that these feelings were fading, that my obsession with her was just a phase. As she stands there, a few feet from me, christening the new flyer, I can't deny the impulse that takes over whenever she is near. I want to be everything to her; I want her to think of me first – as a friend, political ally, military strategist, guardian and lover.

When I am on duty or socialising with the Galactica crew, I can pretend, for a while, that she isn't the only thing I care about. I even fool myself – it's the only way to survive till I see her again.

She moves towards me and those surrounding us fade away; Laura is all I see.

She touches my shoulder as she says. "Hello Captain," her touch is feather light, I feel her hand slip down my arm and she takes my hand, her fingers wrap around mine and I smile. "How have you been?" she asks softly.

I wish she could read my thoughts, wish I could tell her all the ways I would make her happy if she'd let me. But she has no idea of the hours I spend fantasising about her and the life we could have together.

"Good," I reply. "And you?"

I am rewarded with a smile. "I'm well. Life still has a habit of surprising me," Laura answers and glances at the new flyer that bears her name, then looks back at me.

I hold her eye. "You inspire us," I say.

Her green eyes flash and I want to kiss her.

"Madame President?" my father calls.

She glances at him over her shoulder and nods, then returns her attention to me, her hand falls from mine. "See you around, Captain."

She walks away.

I don't want her to leave me behind. I want to follow, but those days are gone. We live separate lives now. I will go to her when she calls, until then I must wait.

I observe Laura in conference with my dad, she turns her head in my direction. Our eyes meet and I feel her tug at the invisible string she has tied around my heart, connecting me to her. I could cross continents, fly to the outer regions of space and I would still feel it. I am bound to her; within and without. I would have it no other way. Serving her is the only peace I have.

Her shinning eyes penetrate mine. I smile.

I want to call out to her. Want to shout-out all my inward thoughts and yearnings, but I resist. I am hers, but she is not mine – she belongs to the people. She gives them her love, there is none spare for me other than as her friend. I take what I can; I would rather have part of her than none.

No one is as close as we two. That's the way it has been since we met, it's the way I always want it to be. She is all I can be sure of; I was fallen, she resurrected me; gave me reason to live. I owe her everything.

She smiles disarmingly and I know my love for her will be as constant as the stars - it's a lifelong commitment I undertake gladly; she has commandeered me.

She returns her focus to my father and I compel myself to look away, then force my feet to carry me to the door of the hanger deck. I make my way to CIC. I need to work, need to keep my mind occupied.

Whenever I close my eyes, behind my lids is her image. I dream my life away; scenarios where she runs into my arms, declares undying love and covers me in kisses. But I cannot afford to expose my feelings; can't risk changing the dynamics of our relationship – I've invested too much to jeopardise it all, so I shall love her in silence.

The End