Well this is my very first sad attempt at a chapter so be afraid. Oh and while I tried to make this a humor, some Roxas fans should probably be ready to see their favorite character in pain. That our just not read it……I wouldn't blame you. Oh well a big moment in my fanfic writing career……..the disclaimer!

I do not own Kingdom Hearts

Wow that was pathetic……….well anyways….on to chapter 1.

Kingdom Hearts

It All Happens To Roxas

Chapter 1: The lost doorknob

It was midnight. Sora was asleep in his bed, his curtains fluttering madly in the storm. A crack of lightning woke the poor brunette from his slumber. As he rubbed his groggy eyes, he heard his front door open and shut. His eyes grew wide in terror as footsteps made their way up the stairs. Sora's bedroom door opened slowly and a dark figure made its way into the room. A crack of lightning revealed the figure to be………Roxas?

Yes ladies and gentleman…..Roxas. Who else but the spiky blonde haired, blue eyed cry baby that was always bugging Sora.

"Why….are you here?" asked Sora, holding back pure rage. Roxas appeared to be crying at an unruly speed.

"I LOST MY DOORKNOB!" cried Roxas. Sora had always been used to these outbursts of pure nonsense. Sora sighed and guessed he better give this a shot.

"Well….where'd you leave it last?"

"I locked my door in the morning (sniff) and went to the mall (sniff) and when I got back……IT WAS GONE!" Roxas yelled to the heavens.

"Wait. How much time did you spend at the mall?" questioned Sora.

"About five minutes. I'm very impatient" blushed Roxas

"FIVE MINUTES? WHAT DID YOU DO THAT COULD HAVE LASTED THE ENTIRE DAY?" screamed Sora.

"I….uh……was on the toilet?" Roxas lied.

"WRONG ANSWER!" Sora yelled as he took out his Keyblade. Roxas screamed and yelled, but there was no use. Roxas could not get away.

The next day, Roxas was walking on crutches, searching the entire town for his beloved lost doorknob. Where someone would have put it was the real question. Maybe it fell, or was stolen and auctioned on eBay. One thing was for certain. Roxas would not stop until he found that doorknob. But yet he had to ruin everyone else's lives by dragging this problem into their matters. He asked Riku, Axel, Demyx, Kairi, and Namine. Everyone except Sora. Roxas needed to stay away from Sora.

Near his house, Roxas found walking out of a store with a shiny silver doorknob. Roxas flared with anger as he lunged at Cloud, tackling him with full force in the mid section. Roxas scrambled for the doorknob which had fell out of Clouds hand, but Cloud quickly grabbed it and ran down the street. Defeated, Roxas looked up at the sign that hung over the store's door. It read "Corey's Door and Hardware Shop"

"Oh." Roxas whispered to himself. He had made a complete fool out of himself in front of Cloud.

Roxas decided to head home, knowing he would never find his poor doorknob. As he walked up his driveway he noticed a rusty old silver doorknob on his door. Roxas' frown turned upside down.

"KNOBBY YOU'RE BACK!" Roxas squealed with glee, as figure approached him from behind, unnoticed.

"Hello Roxas." Said an angry voice. Roxas turned around to see Sora, Riku, Axel, Demyx, Kairi, Namine and Cloud forming a semi-circle around him, backing him into the door. They all had kitchen utensils in they're hands like egg beaters, and rolling pins, and pots and pans.

"We would just like to point out that your beloved doorknob never left its place! You were just crying for attention like you always do!" accused Riku.

"Yeah," said Cloud "I even saw it yesterday when I was going to the shop that you attacked me outside of today. I was making an investment!"

"An investment in a doorknob?" chuckled Roxas.

"Keep it quiet or I'll force feed you you're crutches."

"Why not do that too?" asked Sora evilly as they started to move in on Roxas. Roxas pleaded and cried and begged for mercy, but the mob would show none. The beating lasted for several minutes; each person wanting to make sure all frustration was released. After they where done, Cloud ripped off Roxas' doorknob and dropped it beside him, as they walked away. Before slipping out of consciousness, Roxas muttered something.

"Look on the bright side. At least I got you back."

The crappiest chapter you've ever read isn't it? Oh well please R&R!