A/N: This is an AU South Park story. The characters have not yet met each other.
It is based on the Cube films, if you haven't seen them you should, they're actually pretty cool
I do not own South Park.
Warning: There will be gore, some offensive terms, maybe slash, straight pairings (not sure what that's called), swearing, and violence.
So here it is
South Cube
Chapter One
A slightly muscular boy of about fourteen years of age woke up and gazed around the room. It didn't take him long to realise that the room with red tiles covering the walls and several different hatches to leave the room was not his room.
"Where am I?" He muttered out loud. When he got up to observe the area he was in, he felt himself step on something warm and squishy. Oh man, I hope I didn't step on a dog. He thought to himself worriedly, he hated when animals got hurt.
"Watch out butt licker!" The thing he stepped on snapped. Okay, so good, it wasn't a dog. He thought to himself. He looked down and saw an overweight boy about his age with brown hair and brown eyes. The boy was wearing a blue jumpsuit and he had a pair of horn rimmed glasses perched up on his pug nose. He saw on the breast pocket of the boy's jumpsuit, he had the name 'Eric' sewn on the badge.
"Sorry." He said with embarrassment, knowing that this guy might be able to beat him up, though very few people could.
"Whatever Stan." Eric said taking his own time to glance at the black haired blue eyed boy in front of him. He knew that he would have to put this boy on his hit list, no one stepped on Eric Theodore Cartman and got away with it! Just then, both boys heard a weird hissing noise and one of the hatches started to open. Stan noticed someone coming through the hatch, this might be the person who trapped us in here, he thought to himself pulling the person the rest of the way out and slamming them on the ground with his hands around their neck.
"Get off me!" The person yelled. Stan could now see it was a boy with red curly hair, the boy had an angry yet scared expression on his face.
"Sorry." Stan muttered.
"Where the hell are we?" The boy demanded to know. Stan shrugged,
"We're just as lost as you." He replied.
"Well, they better get us out soon or I'll call the cops!" Eric threatened.
"Eric, do you happen to have a cell phone on you? I tried calling the cops when I first woke up but I found they had taken all my personal belongings."
The redhead said while using a lot of hand gestures while he was speaking. At this Eric frowned.
"First of all, do not call me Eric; I go by my surname which is Cartman. Second of all, you're either a Jew or you do debate."
Eric replied. The redhead looked at Cartman with surprise.
"Actually, you're quite close, I am a Jew and my dad is a lawyer!" The redhead exclaimed.
"You say that like it's a good thing, Kyle." Cartman said narrowing his eyes at the redhead. Kyle in return, gave Cartman a funny look and then turned to Stan.
"I wonder if we're the only ones in here." He said. As if some kind of force was listening to him, the boys heard the hissing noise again and they saw a boy with brown hair and eyes slightly darker than Cartman's step out of the hatch.
"W-what am I doing here? Where am I?" The boy asked in a scared voice before breaking into tears.
"Oh gosh, just what we need, a cry baby and a Jew, I know who I'm killing off first." Cartman said with annoyance.
"Cartman! This isn't Saw!" Stan yelled out, hoping that he was right. Kyle looked down for a few moments before looking back up.
"Actually, there is something I didn't tell you before, while I was walking around from room to room, I looked down and was about to go into one of the rooms until I saw a dead body in it. I could see close enough that the body had its face burned off." He said.
"So?" Cartman said.
"I think that some of the rooms might be rigged to kill us." Kyle said solemnly who earned a scoff from Cartman and a loud whimper from the crying boy who was named Clyde.
"How will we know which ones are trapped?" Stan asked, he seemed to be the most level headed out of the group besides Kyle.
"I think they're set off by motion, I guess we could throw something in the room to see if it sets it off." Kyle replied.
"How about our shoes? I mean we can take one shoe off and then throw it out and drag it back up by its lace if the room doesn't demolish it?" A new voice said. The boys turned around and saw a tall chubby boy with short blond hair and blue eyes.
"That's a fantastic idea, Butters!" Kyle exclaimed. Stan nodded in agreement.
"I could have thought of a better plan." Cartman scoffed.
"Well, I don't see you making any fat ass!" Kyle snapped with his face turning the same shade as his hair.
"So, are we just going to sit here or are we going to try and find a way out before we all starve to death?" Butters asked. The boys nodded in agreement and started to head for a hatch on the left side of the wall, when Stan opened it, a boy who looked like him but slightly taller, slammed into him.
"Watch where you're going, jerk." The boy said in a monotone voice getting up off of Stan and brushing his work type uniform off.
"Sorry." Stan muttered, he could tell by the boy's steel grey eyes that he was not someone to be messed with either.
"Why are we all dressed like we're in a Concentration Camp or something?" Cartman demanded, earning a glare from Kyle.
"Yea, I noticed that we're all in the same outfit too." The boy who fell on Stan muttered.
"I know I bet I look so horrible in this dreadful outfit!" They heard a female voice shriek out. They all turned around and saw a girl with curly blonde hair to her waist. Her light green eyes were glistening with tears as she stared around the room.
"I'm so glad I'm not the only one." She said with a grateful smile.
"And I'm glad I'm not the only girl here." Another girl with straight black hair to her shoulders said walking into the room.
"How did you know there were boys in here? I mean, wouldn't you have come with one of them to this room instead of coming by yourself?"
Stan asked suspiciously.
"For your information, Stan, I woke up in a room with you and the fat boy over there and I decided to go explore before I decided to wake you guys up. I mean I figured you'd only drag me down." She said.
"What the hell did you say bitch?" Cartman demanded. Kyle sighed and rolled his eyes.
"Can you go ONE minute without saying something negative about someone?" He asked with annoyance.
"No one asked you Jew! Besides, she was going to leave us here to die!" Cartman yelled. The girl's eyes filled up with tears.
"I was not! I was going to come back for you after I found the exit!"
She exclaimed. Craig rolled his eyes at her and Stan walked up and put a comforting hand on her shoulder.
"It's okay, I believe you Wendy." He said trying to console her, he didn't want another person in here crying.
"Thank you." Wendy sniffed giving Stan a small hug. He noticed that she smelt a bit like lilacs, he loved it.
"Are we going to leave the room or…?" Butters asked motioning towards one of the hatches.
"I think that before we leave this room, we should try and figure out why we're here and what they want from us." Kyle said.
"Good idea." Stan said and the others started gathering to the middle of the room and they began sitting criss cross applesauce to form a circle. For once, Cartman didn't complain.
"Maybe they're going by physical size, you know like an endurance test or something." Clyde said. He had finally stopped crying.
"I doubt that, I mean look at Kyle, he is tiny, he barely comes up to my shoulder and Cartman is huge." Stan said earning a glare from both Kyle and Cartman.
"What? It's true." Wendy said coming to Stan's defence when she saw them glaring at him.
"Maybe it has to do with intelligence or something, I mean, I make straight A's in school." Kyle said.
"Me too!" Wendy exclaimed.
"We make straight F's." Craig and the blonde girl, Bebe, said in unison. Bebe turned and giggled at Craig who gave a slight smile back. He liked her laugh. Stan sighed and looked at his hands, if it wasn't intelligence, what else could it be?
"Have you ever done anything you regret? Like something to hurt another person?" Clyde asked.
"I one blew up a dam, it probably killed a few people, not to mention a ton of beavers." Stan replied with tears welling up in his eyes as he remembered that frightful day. Those poor innocent beavers, they never had a chance.
"I regret it so much, there's not a day that doesn't go by that I don't wish that I hadn't have done that." He sniffed.
"I once made a kid's parents into chilli and forced him to eat it, I don't regret it though." Cartman said with a boastful smile on his face.
"You're lying." Kyle said narrowing his eyes.
"Nu uh, you're just jealous that you haven't done anything as cool as me." Cartman said with his arms crossed proudly against his chest.
"I once used to be a very shy, naïve, and awkward boy, that didn't stop me from doing something so sinister that it must never be spoken of again," Butters said solemnly.
"Just tell us, we don't have room for secrets here." Kyle said with slight annoyance.
"What's wrong? I mean we can last a few days without water and about a month without food, I'm sure the place can't be THAT big." Wendy said.
"Yes it is! I'm a diabetic and I need food, not to mention they too my insulin." Kyle said with his eyes filling up with tears of frustration.
"That's odd; they left me my inhaler for my asthma." Stan said pulling a small plastic device out of his pocket and taking a puff out of it.
"They also left Eric his glasses but they took mine." Bebe said.
"I go by Cartman." Cartman said to everyone in the room who hadn't heard yet.
"Why are they taking some people's items and not others?" Wendy asked.
"Maybe it's random." Butters suggested.
"Nothing is random, things were obviously done like this for a reason. Maybe they want half of us to succeed and half of us to not succeed." Kyle said.
"Since Stan and Cartman are clearly the favourites in this experiment that we know of, I think that they should be the team leaders for each team." He continued.
"Why are we splitting into teams? I don't want to separate!" Clyde exclaimed and he started bursting into tears again.
"If we split into teams, we can find an exit faster; the first team to find the exit send one person from their team out to come find us." Kyle said.
"I think two teams of four people each will be a great idea." Stan said and the others nodded in agreement, even Clyde who was crying about it just moments ago.
"I think we should decide the teams on certain skills that each person possesses, Wendy and Kyle are both extremely intelligent, and so they should be on different teams." Butters said, proud that Military school had not only toughed him up, but it had also made him think more logically and clear than he did before.
"I don't want to be on the fat ass's team." Kyle said pointing at Cartman.
"I'll be on his team then." Wendy said, not sounding too thrilled, as she went to go stand by Cartman. Stan let out a small sigh, sad that the girl who smelled like lilacs would not be on his team.
"So, we have two people to their teams, what's next?" Craig asked even though he wasn't that interested.
"Physical strength, Cartman and I are clearly the most physically strong so I think that we should be on different teams." Butters replied.
"You honestly think you're stronger than me?" Craig asked eying Butters up and down. He may have believed him if Butters didn't have a tyre around his middle.
"Yes!" Butters exclaimed, picking Craig up and carrying him over to Cartman's side to prove his point. Craig weighed one hundred and eighty-three pounds and he could only lift one fifty so he guessed that Butters was stronger than him.
"Bebe, you're on Cartman's team and Clyde you're on ours." Butters announced to the last to remaining people.
"Why does Cartman get both the girls?" Stan exclaimed.
"It's the logical thing Stan; I don't expect you to understand." Kyle said, understanding Butters' reasoning. Bebe seemed fierce and bubbly which would help level out Craig's borderline catatonic personality. Her personality would probably clash with his own fierce temper as well her sensitive side would clash with Clyde's.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Stan asked angrily shoving Kyle against the wall.
"As if you don't know!" Kyle exclaimed shoving Stan back; Stan didn't move an inch though.
"What are you talking about?" Stan asked narrowing his eyes at Kyle; this boy was really starting to piss him off.
"I mean with your build and looks and everything you must be a jock who gets everything they want right? I mean who cares about grades right?" Kyle said in a mocking tone.
"For your information, I do not play sports unless you count playing on the WII as a sport, I am an animal rights activist and the lowest grade I ever made on a report card was a high D." Stan said coolly.
"I apologise, it was wrong of me to judge you like that." Kyle said looking down in shame.
"It's fine." Stan said rolling his eyes, he was grateful that Kyle had apologised but he was still a bit ticked that he had taken Wendy's place on his team.
"We should check this hatch." Stan said throwing his shoe in there while still hanging onto the lace.
"Clear!" He yelled pulling the shoe back in and jumping into the next room. This room was full of blue tiles. Stan and the rest of his group were surprised to see Cartman's group clamber in after them.
"What are you doing?" He asked.
"What if there is only one unrigged hatch in each room?" Cartman asked.
"You could be right, I mean, maybe they didn't want us to split up." Wendy said tapping her chin.
"I told you groups were a bad idea." Clyde said.
"Let's just stick together then." Stan said, taking into consideration that Cartman's theory could be true. The rest of the group nodded and they continued to test the hatches, determined to get out of there alive.