Author's Note: So I finally decided to write a story about Puella Magi Madoka Magica. I'm positive this is going to be a chaptered fic, ending with the death of Kyouko's family, at least, that's what I have in mind. No pairings here though. I'm not big on Yuri (Although I'm faithful to the Kyouko/Homura fandom). But as for right now, I'm gonna hold off on updating this until I get feedback. So, tell me what ya think!
Disclaimer: I do not own Puella Magi Madoka Magica.
Something was missing in me. I wasn't quite sure what it was — but the entire situation of it; not knowing what it was, continued to press down my shoulders harder and harsher as the days passed. Even as I heard God's voice in my ears, whispering sweet comforts and soothing words, I was still curious. I prayed every day, in front of the altar in our cathedral, but I still couldn't find it — what I was missing. I felt the emptiness of it within my heart, but not even the celestials that danced across my window at night as I slept could quell the blackness of curiosity deep within me. Darkness was the only thing that awaited me when I drifted off to sleep — to dream of it.
The huge face of a laughing human, twisted into a devilish grin — too evil to be an expression a human would wear, even if to disturb or mock another. Sweeping plumes of blue swept through the air around her; carrying the scent of witchcraft and black magic along the edges of the frilled bottom of the swaths of blue. Every night I'd dream of her, the spinning circles and the clicking of the clock beside me. My heart beat echoed the ticks of the clock, desperation and despair pulsating in every pore of my body as I'd lift my head to face her, surrounded by the bleakness of the darkness around us. Helplessness was her nature — despair was her ally. She made me feel afraid, only when she turned her face to me. Her hauntingly mocking face, twisted in a bitter grin. The sound of her laughter made the venom spread, eventually paralyzing me with fear. My prayer never reached God.
But I couldn't shake off the feeling that those dreams, the dreams when I'd meet her in battle were more than dreams. They had to be more than dreams. Each time I'd find myself in that place, with her staring me deeply into the eyes with her black magic and lingering laughter, I'd proceed further and further forward. She'd kill me further and further down the timeline, pausing for a few seconds longer than the dream before. In essence, the amount of time I had left once she parted her lips and began laughing would increase by several seconds each time, like an endless loop that I couldn't escape. The feeling of foreboding that welled up in my stomach as I lay in bed waiting for sleep to find me wrote the words of my death sentence across my heart: I wouldn't ever escape until I defeated her.
I walked my path each and every day, looking out for my little sister, Momoko, as she played in the gardens that sprawled across the backyard behind the cathedral my family lived in. It was a peaceful life, at least during the day. But each night, I'd bid farewell to the peacefulness and light and enter that world of darkness and hopelessness where she lived. Every night my dream of fighting and dying at the hands of her would haunt me during the day, hindering every movement I made, shadowing each breath I took. I relished the feeling of being alive, for I knew that when I closed my eyes, she would appear to me again. I could still hear her laughter in the whispers of the trees, as I lingered beneath the cherry blossom tree in the center of the garden, weighing down upon my chest. I would return there tonight. I would return, and always return — until I defeated her.