The Oath

By Dragon's Daughter 1980

Disclaimer: Other than being a devoted fan, I don't have anything to do with Numb3rs. I do have claim over the Original Characters though.

I don't know why I'm sitting here, when I know that if I do not want to be late for one of the most important ceremonies of my life, I have to go now, but… I want this last moment of contemplation before I cross a threshold I can never return from.

That sounded grim, didn't it? Unnecessarily so. No one forced me to make this decision. I chose this path and I don't regret it. My parents think that I made my decision to apply to Quantico only a year ago. But truth be told, even before I went to Georgetown to study law, I already knew that my interest in the legal system was not as a potential attorney, but as a Bureau agent. When I graduated this past June, I knew that I had to tell them. The Bureau had extended a job offer and I was accepting it. They had to know and they deserved to be told in person. So, I did. Calmly. Over dinner at home. Needless to say, my parents were shocked, proud, and terrified at my announcement. Especially after I told them that I would start training in three weeks.

After several minutes of long silence, my mother had smiled slightly and said that maybe they should have seen it coming. I was a little troubled by my father's expression, but the dark sadness in his eyes quickly passed and he had given me an approving nod before voicing his support. My younger siblings just stared at me in shock.

So I came here, in pursuit of a career that I know, somehow, I will be satisfied with. Every one of my classmates and instructors has a passion for Justice, even if it is just an ideal that may never be reached. My instructors have tempered that belief with grim reality; the same truths that have caused the bleakness I have seen in my father's eyes so many times in my childhood during hard cases. At the same time, they fed me knowledge and procedure, at times ramming it down my throat until my classmates and I were all ready to run screaming out of the classroom. I have learned as much as I could here, did my best, and usually collapsed into bed at the end of the day, exhausted, but satisfied.

I look out at the near empty compound. I know that despite the amount of knowledge I have learned here, my training will be aided by hard experience. I know there will be many more nights when I will go home less than satisfied, more frustrated than content, more drained than words can ever express. I know that after today, I will lose any nativity I might still have, will probably lose my ability to sleep peacefully, lose any protection that I might have had as a civilian. But I am choosing this life and I don't regret it. In less than an hour, I will hold a badge in my hand and I will see the three words that will govern my conduct for a lifetime engraved in metal. Fidelity. Bravery. Integrity.

Those words will simply crystallize what my parents have always taught me, by word and by act: to be faithful to family and friends, to be courageous enough to accept the future with open arms, to tell the truth because that's what matters. They have taught me that family is the failsafe safety net in life when everything has gone wrong. Friends can become kin, regardless of blood ties. Hope can be found in the smallest of things. But most of all, they have shown me that love is the cornerstone of a happy life.

I know my family will start looking for me soon. Even though we have kept in close contact over the years while I was away at college, the phone calls, letters and emails are no replacement for face-to-face physical contact. Both of my parents took unpaid leave to fly out to see me today. And while they insisted it was perfectly fine for them to come, that it was no trouble at all, I know they have been busy for the past few weeks, and it's more than likely that they still are running cases even though they are across the nation from their offices. My younger brother's schedule is slightly more flexible, though I am sure that he probably had to do a lot of bargaining with his professors to get a few days off. He's a pre-med student and looking to become a psychiatrist. I've teased him about how the 'shrink' gene got passed to him via osmosis from Aunt Megan. But I am proud of him. He has this calmness, a patience that makes practically anyone feel safe and comfortable. I have a harder patience that springs from a willingness to toil relentlessly. It's something that my sister would shake her head slowly at and smile before turning back to her law books or her flute. My grandfather says that my sister's love of law and music spring from my grandmother. Even though she's only in her second year of college, she's firmly on the path to law school while interning with the AUSA's office. I know she doesn't have spare time and that she caught a red-eye flight after one of her essential classes to be here in time for my graduation. She's likely running on caffeine, but knowing her, she'll smile when she sees me and pretend that she hasn't been awake for over twenty hours straight. But I'm glad they're here.

There's a rustle behind me and I turn sharply around toward the source of the sound. I'm fairly safe on Quantico grounds, but my awareness of my surroundings will soon be one of my most prized tools in keeping me safe. I relax and smile at the woman who slips out of the bushes with a mischievous grin. A few strands of her brown-hair have escaped from the coiled bun that keeps her hair out of her face and her brown eyes have barely noticeable bags underneath them. I know that means she's probably just finished her classes at Georgetown and then driven here to see me graduate. She smoothes out an imaginary wrinkle in her dress and brushes a leaf out of her hair.

"Why, hello there Mr. Eppes," she teases lightly.

"Ms. Alexander, please," I gesture at the empty seat on the bench beside me, "sit down."

"With pleasure," she replies, sitting close to me and taking my right hand in both of hers. We sit in silence for a few moments.

"What brings you here?" my longtime girlfriend asks me quietly.

"Thinking," I tell her. She smiles slightly and doesn't press for more. "How was it?"

"The professor, the incredibly boring class, or the drive?" she grins. "When I pass the bar, it'll be worth it. The drive, well, I hope wherever you're going, the traffic's better than the Beltway." I squeeze her hand, "Adele, we agreed. It doesn't matter where I get posted. You're going to Columbia."

"If I get accepted," she corrects mildly. "There's heavy competition for graduate students, you know."

"There's no if," I reply staunchly. "You're going to get in."

"I know," she says, resting her head on my shoulder. "But I am going to worry about you. They're not going to let you be close, are they?"

"Not close to home, not yet, no." I sigh a little at the thought. It's rare that someone works in his or her home state during his or her first year with the Bureau. It supposedly accustoms new agents to being on their own and to the semi-nomadic lifestyle that single agents tended to lead. I think it allows us to focus on the job; even though in my case, I'll probably worry about my parents and they'll worry about me, knowing I'll be at least a state's distance away from them, if not out of the country. Then there's the knowledge that wherever I end up, I probably won't be able to see Adele as often as I would like to. It worries me a little, that I might lose her before we really have a chance to explore what we have.

"It's going to be okay," she comforts me. I squeeze her hand in silent thanks. We listen to a bird chirp for its mate for a few minutes. She fidgets slightly, her fingers absently caressing mine. I know that the upcoming ceremony is on her mind as much as it is on mine, for different reasons. She is nervous about meeting my family. Despite the fact that we have been going out for three years now, she's never had a chance to meet them before today. Studying for a pre-law degree at Georgetown, working a part time job and balancing a government internship doesn't leave her much time for a social life. Considering that I had a familiar similar lifestyle, it's a minor miracle that we have actually had time to be with each other. But the two of us have managed quite happily, maintaining this balance between pleasure and work.

I met Adele Alexander three years ago at the gated entrance to the residential colleges. It was a stormy autumn evening, and I was coming back from a study session with one of my professors. There was a short brunette standing at the iron gates, trying to juggle an armful of books and her keycard.

"Hi, there," I said, taking care not to get too close to her. If this woman had parents and family friends like mine did, she would know how to defend herself if she felt threatened. Plus, even if she didn't know Krav Maga, those books looked heavy and I bet they would fracture a few ribs if she decided to shove them into my chest. She jerked around when she heard my voice and looked at me, looking more than slightly terrified.

"Sorry," I said with a smile, trying to put her at ease and turning on the Eppes charm. "Do you need some help there?" It worked. She relaxed, slightly, which was a peg in her favor. She was smart, street smart as well as book smart. Never trust a stranger. Even if said stranger was good-looking and affable like I am.

"Yeah, could you?" She nodded toward the keypad, taking a few steps back as I approached. I swiped my keycard and held the gate open for her. Trying to be friendly, as well as fishing for information, I asked, "Which college do you belong to?"

"Winchester," she answered shyly as she stepped through the entrance, "Thank you." I didn't bother hiding my surprise. I hadn't seen her before in the halls, though granted, there were several hundred people in my residential college. But I would have remembered her.

"As desperate as this might sound, I'm also in Winchester. Are you a freshman?"

"Yes," she replied, eying me as if she was contemplating dropping her load of books on my foot if I made a snide comment. I made a worse mistake when I opened my mouth.

"I wouldn't mind showing you around," I offered awkwardly, just before I started berating myself for jumping the gun. 'What the hell are you thinking Eppes! Hitting on a girl you've just met! If she doesn't hurt you with that law book, count yourself lucky.'

To my everlasting surprise, she didn't drop her textbooks on any portion of my anatomy that night. She also didn't turn down my offer.

Somehow that campus tour ended in the student café, where we found ourselves talking amicably for most of the morning, reluctantly stopping when we had to get to class. I barely made it to lecture hall on time that day, and had a hell of a time concentrating too. We managed to find each other that night in the dinning hall and started talking again. It became a ritual for the two of us to meet at mealtimes to chat about our classes, our lives, our families, our plans, and basically anything we wanted to.

I found out that she was planning to be lawyer while she expressed a genuine interest in my plans to enter the Bureau. She had a wicked sense of humor and a ready smile. I found myself laughing and relaxing whenever I was with her. I eventually worked up the nerve to ask her to join a few friends and me on an outing to D.C. one night. At first the meetings were casual; we would visit a national site or go to the beach or a state park with a crowd of friends. Then the number of those friends gradually diminished until it was just the two of us taking off for the weekend. It was during one of those private 'meetings' that I kissed her. After we had sufficiently recovered our breath and she still hadn't slapped me, I asked her out on a formal date. She accepted. We've been a couple ever since.

"I'm kind of scared," she tells me. I slip my hand out of hers and unpin her hair, letting her brown tresses fall out of their tight bun.

"Don't worry," I tell her. "My family will be overjoyed to meet you. Besides, haven't I told you a lot about them?"

"Yeah," she nods as I slowly run my fingers through her long hair. "I guess…It's just that I shouldn't be so worked up about this, I guess. I mean, it can't be worse than having to give a deposition."

"No," I chuckle, smoothing her hair down and grasping her hand again, "and a lot less painful." She laughs along with me. I lean over and kiss her gently.

"I love you Adele," I whisper against her lips. I intend to sit back, but she links her hands behind my neck, her warm eyes meeting mine.

"I love you too William," she tells me honestly before my mind goes blissfully blank as her lips touch mine.

"Kiss for luck," she tells me afterwards and then pulls away. I glance at my watch; if we hurry, we'll make it in time.

"No lipstick?" I ask her as I take her hand and place it in the crook of my elbow. She smiles at the inside joke and replies, "No lipstick."

I lead her out of the alcove. "You're naturally beautiful."

"Oh you're just saying that because you love me," she teases. We're out on the Academy footpaths now and I can see the milling crowd of my classmates, our families and the honored dignitaries standing in the staging area.

"I do," I smile at her, "but it's true." She smiles gently and replies, "I know. Come on, we'll be late. And I want to talk to your parents before the ceremony starts."

"Yes, Ma'am," I say, leading her towards the crowd.

We're at the fringes of the multitude of people when someone taps me gently on the shoulder. I turn around and smile, swinging Adele around to face my parents.

"Mom, Dad," I say proudly, "This is Adele. Adele," I cover her hand with my free one in a silent gesture of support. "My parents."

"Mr. Eppes, Mrs. Eppes," she nods politely. My mother smiles warmly and takes Adele's free hand. "William has said so much about you. I was hoping, perhaps afterwards, we could have some time to talk?" Adele blushes slightly and nods.

My father gives her a charming, easy smile and shakes her hand. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you. You must be an exceptional young woman to have attracted William's attention."

"Thank you," she murmurs. My grandfather, still spry for his age, comes forward with his cane, my mother's hand hovering protectively at his elbow. Adele steps away from me to close the distance he needs to travel to reach her. My grandfather smiles and hugs her when she's within reach.

"Hopefully," he says as he lets her go, "my boy will get his head on straight and propose to you soon." For once, she is clearly at a loss for words. The two of us have actually talked quite seriously about marriage, but we've decided, for now, to put things off. We could end up living on different sides of the nation for the next few years, and I don't want to pressure her into anything she doesn't want. Fortunately, she's saved from a need to reply when my brother and sister arrive. Benjamin grins mischievously at me and turns to Adele, "So this is the famous Ms. Alexander who's stolen my brother's heart. A stunning vision, I must say. Benjamin Eppes, my fair lady," he says, bowing over her hand.

"Don't pay any attention to him," I interrupt good-naturedly. Adele exchanges an amused look with me before Sarah playfully shoves our brother.

"Oh, don't frighten her away. And hands off," she mock scolds, "Or else what's Rosalind going to say?" Rosalind Russell is my brother's girlfriend of a year; he is devoted to her, even though it's really too soon to say whether or not the relationship is serious. Sarah tosses her black hair back over her shoulder.

"Hi, I'm Sarah. Whatever he's told you about me," she says to Adele with a straight face as they shook hands, "probably isn't true."

"Hey!" My girlfriend laughs at my protest before she says, "You're probably very right. I'm Adele, thrilled to meet you." The way the two of them are smiling at each other makes me willing to bet that they will be fast friends before the end of today. That assures me immensely. While I knew that Adele would be accepted without question into my family, there was still the chance that something would go wrong. Grandfather, obviously, approves of her, and I can tell that she's won over the rest of the family in the first ten minutes of their conversation.

My family falls to talking about our lives since the last time we spoke and everyone peppers Adele with questions about her life and family. She handles the semi-interrogation with grace, while I watch her tranquility with pride. I know she will turn out to be a very steady, level-headed lawyer in the courtroom. She hasn't said anything about her plans after Columbia, but a selfish part of me hopes she winds up as an AUSA if she goes into criminal law. But seriously, I wasn't planning on a 'like father, like son,' generational repeat by falling in love with a lawyer like my father did with my mother.

One of my classmates taps my shoulder lightly, bringing me out of my musings, and I nod at him. It's time. As I leave to join my classmates, my grandfather and parents have proud smiles on their faces, my siblings look about ready to burst with pride, and Adele touches my cheek gently in place of a kiss. We both still remember the time I nearly went to class with her lipstick on my skin. Today would not be a good time for a repeat of that event. (Fortunately, the one and only time that happened, we discovered that her stay-on makeup wasn't resistant to moist towelettes.)

I take my assigned seat in the gathering and listen to our head instructor make the required graduation speech. When he is done, roll call begins in alphabetical order for our graduating class. As we are called, each of my classmates makes his or her way onto the stage to swear the oath that will bind us to duty and to receive the badge that entrusts us with the safety of the innocent public. With an assured confidence, I stand and walk towards the stage when my name is called.

I know that my chosen path in life will be hard. I know that my father, with his excellent record of solved cases and my uncle's aid, have left me a high legacy to live up to. I know that my family is intelligent, if not of outright genius and it will make life difficult sometimes, both professionally and personally.

But it is worth it. Helping others is in my blood, in my family's blood. I don't want to turn away from that. I know that my family's love and support will get me through whatever awaits me after today, that I will learn how to balance life and work as my parents have, loving another while fulfilling promises they have always intended to keep. I will not falter. Not with them beside me, not with Adele standing with me.

And so, like my father before me, I take a deep calming breath, raise my hand and begin to recite the oath to which my family has held themselves to for all my life, "I, William Alan Eppes, do solemnly swear to support, uphold and defend…"