A/N: I've been meaning to another Rocket-centered story since seeing 'Guardians of the Galaxy vol. 2' in theaters. But, now that I got the chance to see it again, I have a perfect story set in mind. Everyone knows Rocket Raccoon as the one Guardian on the team who has a huge thing for guns, money, hot women, and blowing things up. But, what does Rocket do when he has some time to actually relax? In this story, you're gonna find out! Enjoy.
6:00 AM
Rocket was still asleep in his bed on board the ship he and Yondu stole from Taserface and the rogue ravagers back when they were escaping them. The alarm clock that sat on the nightstand next to his bed began to go off, letting off a loud beeping noise every few seconds. Rocket turned to the other side of his bed to try and avoid the loud alarm clock noises, but the alarm was still blaring in his ears.
"Alright, alright. I'm up!" Rocket said groggily before rolling over to the clock and slamming his paw down on the button to turn it off.
"Much better" He groaned now that his clock was silent at last. He then walked over to the closet and removed his pajamas, which were just a pair of shrunken navy blue sweatpants and a shrunken dark gray t-shirt given to him by Quill (he shrunk them in the laundry just for him). Once he pressed the button that opened up the automatic door to the closet, Rocket selected one of his signature jump suits in a dark red color and hung it up on a hook on the wall that was right next to the bathroom.
"Now to get myself cleaned up. Don't wanna smell bad, especially after what the guys did to me months ago where they forced me into a bath after not showering for weeks" Rocket said to himself as he walked into the bathroom and stood in front of the mirror, only clad in his tighty whities. The intelligent raccoon then took his toothbrush out of it's stone cup carrier and got the bristles wet from the running water coming from the sink, placed some toothpaste on and began brushing until his teeth were clean and breath were minty fresh.
"Wait, what day is it anyways?" Rocket asked with his mouth still full of toothpaste. He then spat it out into the sink and wiped the excess off his lips before he walked over to his nightstand and took up his wrist computer from right next to the alarm. After turning it on, he activated the calendar function and his eyes widened when he saw the date.
"October First... it's my day off" Rocket said, realizing what today was for him. Usually the Guardians got one day off a month. Drax's day off was last week, and Gamora's was two weeks ago on Saturday after Yondu's funeral. Rocket then took in a deep breath and exhaled smiling, he had been waiting for a long time for his day off.
"This is just what I need" Rocket said before walking back into the bathroom to take his shower.
6:45 AM
After taking a nice, hot, and relaxing shower, Rocket walked into the main living quarters of the ship. Instead of wearing the jumpsuit he had picked out earlier, now he was wearing a pair of black fleece pants and a white long-sleeve shirt. He then walked over towards the counter and got a mug out of one of the drawers before he walked over to the device that humans called a "Keurig", which Gamora had found about one week ago in a large pile of junk in the back with a bunch of other treasures that the old ravager group had collected. It made a drink that Quill called 'Coffee' which was what humans on Earth drank to keep themselves energized for tiring tasks and waking up every morning.
"Okay, now where's the 'Chocolate Glazed Donut' stuff? I swear we had some here just, oh no wait, here it is" Rocket said as he searched through the drawer that kept the small cups that contained the ground beans to make the 'Chocolate Glazed Donut' flavored coffee, which was Rocket's favorite. After placing the cup inside, he placed the mug on the slot where the coffee was supposed to come out and watched as the dark brown liquid was dispensed into the mug. Once the mug was full, Rocket took a seat on the kitchen island and began drinking his coffee in peace.
"Mmm, now that is a good cup of coffee" Rocket said after taking a sip. He enjoyed the silence, especially in the morning, nobody to bother him, or to be talking at him while he was still tired and didn't wanna put up with anyone else. After a few minutes, Quill, Drax, Gamora, Mantis, and Teen Groot ran inside the living area.
"Oh, there you are" Quill said.
"Why aren't you dressed?" asked Gamora.
"What are you talking about? I am dressed" Rocket asked.
"She meant, why aren't you dressed for our job today?" Quill clarified.
"You are aware that it's my day off, right?" Rocket said before taking another sip of coffee.
"Wait what?" Drax asked. Rocket's ear twitched and let out a low growl.
"It's. My. Day. Off. First of October is my only day off for this month, I don't plan on spending it to work" Rocket said before taking out a breakfast bagel and biting into it after sitting back down where his coffee was.
"Aw come on, we were gonna..." Quill was about to continue but Gamora stopped him.
"Come on, Peter. Let's just let Rocket have his peace and quiet. Sorry we disturbed you" Gamora apologized to the raccoon.
"Nah, that's okay. Good luck, by the way" said Rocket after he swallowed more of his bagel. And with that, everyone else left the living quarters, and Rocket was alone once more.
"This is gonna be a good day, I can tell" Rocket said as he took one final sip of his coffee before finishing it all.
8:00 AM
Rocket walked into Teen Groot's room, carrying some gloves, a trash bag, and some hedge clippers. He knew teenagers could be messy, but a teenage plant person? That was a whole different level of messy. Vines and roots everywhere, some of them growing leaves and flowers on them.
"Geez, it's like a greenhouse in here. Tomorrow he and I are gonna have a serious talk about keeping his room clean" Rocket said at the sight of the terrible shape of the room he was in. Rocket wasn't necessarily Groot's father, but ever since he started regrowing from the small twig he salvaged after the battle against Ronan on Xandar, he felt like the flora colossus needed a parental figure until he had fully regrown, and seeing how he had always been with Groot from the beginning, he had no trouble being Groot's surrogate father. He then set the bag on the doorknob and began to get to work on cleaning up the teenaged tree's room.
-Thirty Minutes Later-
The raccoon came out of Teen Groot's room carrying the once empty black garbage bag that was now full with twigs, leaves, vines, branches, and flowers. After he went down to the garbage chute and tossed the bag down, he went back to take a look at his work. The room was now completely spick and span, not a single leaf, vine, flower, weed, branch, or twig in sight. Rocket even took the time to dust all the furniture and clean the window as well.
"Wow, it looks way much better now" Rocket said to himself with a smile of satisfaction on his face. His wrist computer began beeping and he looked down at it to see what it was about. Someone was sending him a communication, it was Nebula.
"Hello?" Rocket said, answering it.
"Hello, Fox" said Nebula on the other end. Rocket just groaned and rubbed the temple of his fuzzy forehead in frustration.
'She's never gonna stop calling me that is she?' Rocket thought to himself in his head.
"Hey Nebula. How's the search for Thanos?" he asked.
"Horrible. I checked where his palace resided but he wasn't there. He must have moved somewhere else, the place looks like it's been abandoned for a while" Nebula explained.
"Oh, that sucks" Rocket replied.
"Is Gamora with you? I wanna ask if she remembers Thanos having other places of refuge somewhere across the galaxy" Nebula asked.
"Oh, no, she's out doing a job with the others" Rocket answered for her.
"If she and the others are away, then why are you the only one on the ship?" Nebula asked confused.
"It's my day off. We get one day off a month, mine's today. I spent half an hour of it cleaning up Groot's room" Rocket explained.
"Was it pretty messy?" asked Nebula.
"It looked like a jungle in there. But what else do you expect from teenagers, they hardly ever do as they're told" said Rocket with a slight chuckle at the end.
"Well, do you have the number for Gamora's communicator so I can try reaching her from there?" Nebula asked.
"Yeah, I'll text it to ya" said Rocket as he began pressing his claw on the small number pad and then the enter button.
"Just got it, thank you" Nebula said.
"No problem. Take it easy" Rocket said.
"You too, bye" Nebula concluded before the communication was cut off. Rocket then left the room and shut the door behind him.
10:45 AM
In the kitchen area of the ship, Rocket took some ingredients out of the large meat freezer, as well as the fridge in the living area. Rocket was now flipping through the pages of a cooking book, while wearing a small apron that fit him. He had just put some marinated tri-tip steak on a well oiled pan that sat on the stove on medium-high heat.
"Remove steak when both sides of steak are well cooked" Rocket read to himself. He then turned away from the book to inspect the meat. Both sides were nice and brown, which made Rocket smile and nod to himself.
"I'd say it's pretty much done" Rocket said aloud before taking a spatula and picking the steak up with it. After placing the steak on a plate and sliced the end of a baguette off and then right down the middle with a bread knife. Rocket then spread some spicy mayonnaise on one of the slices with a butter knife before placing some lettuce on top of it, and then a fried egg that he had prepared earlier before he started cooking the steak. Rocket then placed a lair of spicy sriracha sauce on the egg before he cut a large chunk of the steak to place on top of the sauced egg, and then placed the other slice of bread on top.
"Huh, this may be my second time cooking, but I think this turned out pretty good" Rocket said, admiring the sandwich he made. Rocket then put the ingredients in the fridge, in case he wanted to make another sandwich later as well as placed the dishes and utensils in the dishwasher. Rocket then walked into the living area and sat at the kitchen island with his sandwich on a place.
"Alright, time for the artist to taste his masterpiece" Rocket said before he began to raise his sandwich up towards his mouth. The wrist computer began beeping again just as Rocket was about to take a bite. A growl escaped through the raccoon's teeth as he set the sandwich back down onto the plate.
"What is it this time?" Rocket asked himself before looking down at the wrist computer. It was Quill, he was trying to call him.
"Not today, Star-Munch" Rocket said before pressing his claw on the screen on a red button that was next to the green one.
Call Ignored
Rocket then picked up his sandwich off the plate again. Without any interruptions this time, he took a large bite into his sandwich. Rocket could taste the delicious tri-tip, along with egg, lettuce, spicy mayo and sriracha.
"Mmm, wow that's good" Rocket said as his mouth was still full. After swallowing his mouthful of spicy goodness, the wrist communicator started to beep again. Quill was calling him again. Rocket then groaned and then answered it this time instead of ignoring it.
"Yes?" asked Rocket.
"Did you really just ignore my call the first time I tried talking to you?" asked Quill.
"Well, you were calling me in the middle of lunch. A very spicy and delicious lunch, I gotta say I'm impressed with myself. I didn't know I could cook so good" said Rocket as he bit into the sandwich.
"Whatever, look, can you gimme a hand with something?" Quill asked, his voice sounding very desperate.
"As long as I don't have to set one foot into one of those mini-shuttles" Rocket said with his mouth full.
"The gun you made for me, the trigger is stuck. How do I get it unstuck?" Quill asked.
"The trigger isn't stuck, the safety is on. Just flip the switch on the top right side of the trigger" Rocket explained. Laser noises can now be heard in the background.
"Thanks, Rocket, it's working now" Rocket heard Quill say.
"Glad to hear it. Now please quit bothering me" said the raccoon before hanging up. Rocket then took another bite of his sandwich and was bickering to himself with his mouth still full of steak, egg, lettuce, and bread.
"What part of "I'm on my day off" is not clear to them?" Rocket asked himself. He then continued to eat his lunch in quiet, nobody else was calling him.
12:00 PM
Rocket was now lying down on the couch in his room, reading a book his found in the pile of salvaged items the previous team of ravagers left behind. The book was called "The Snowman" by Jo Nesbo. Rocket had found the book a few days ago but never got a chance to pick it up and read it for himself, but now that he was on his day off, he was halfway through the book.
"Damn, this is pretty good. While at the same time, scary to think about" Rocket said to himself while reading. The book was about a serial killer who appears during the first snowfall of Earth's winter, and went after women who were married mothers and left snowmen at the scene of each murder, giving him the name 'The Snowman'. The concept and idea of the book itself was enough to make Rocket interested. Just as he was about to start reading the next chapter, his wrist computer began to beep again.
"Oh, what do they want now?" asked Rocket as he looked down to see Mantis was calling. Rocket snarled and put a bookmark where he left off before closing the book and sitting right next to him on the couch and answered the call.
"What do you want, Mantis?" asked Rocket as he accepted the call.
"Hello, Puppy! I hope you're not too busy" Mantis greeted.
"My name is not 'Puppy'. And I was in the middle of reading a really good book" Rocket said in a lightly angry tone.
"So, does that mean you are not busy?" Mantis asked. The fact that she was so naive and somewhat dimwitted made Rocket groan and face-paw himself.
"No, it does not. Just tell me what you need" Rocket told her.
"We've come across the mushrooms we were hired to collect. But, there are two kinds of them. One glows blue, while the other glows green" Mantis explained.
"It's the blue ones" said Rocket.
"Are you sure about that?" asked Mantis.
"Yes I'm sure. I've had a similar encounter with those kind of mushrooms. It's the blue ones that have healing qualities, the green ones give you a really bad case of glow in the dark acne" Rocket told her.
"Is that good?" Mantis asked, which made Rocket irritated, and his eye and ear twitched.
"NO! Glow in the dark acne is not good! It's extremely itchy and it takes a week and a half to recover from a condition like that. Just get the blue ones and leave the green ones alone!" Rocket shouted.
"Okay" she said in a cheerful tone. Rocket just groaned and hung up on the call.
"One day without any space battles, strange mushrooms, or dimwitted emotion-readers, is that too much to ask?" Rocket said to himself before he grabbed the book and picked it back up. He then began to feel more calm once he began to read the next chapter, where he left off.
3:30 PM
With his book now finished, Rocket decided to take some time to tinker with some weapons in the workshop area. He had disassembled an old gun found in the garbage chute, and began to take out some of the broken and rusty parts, and replaced them with shiny new ones. He also worked on the wiring as well, so that the firepower would be twice as strong as it was before.
"Okay, now where did I put that hydrospanner? Gonna need it to fasten these fusion coils" said Rocket to himself while he stared down at the weapon's interior workings. The raccoon then looked around the desk and saw it lying on the edge of the table.
"Ah, there it is" Rocket said before picking it up and fastening the screws that held the fusion coils inside the gun's barrel.
"Alright. Now I'm gonna need the fusion cutter to seal this thing shut" Rocket whispered before reaching over and grabbing the tool he was looking for and placed the other part of the gun that would cover up all the weapon's inner workings. Just as he was about to seal the seams shut, his wrist computer began beeping again. Rocket then turned the plasma cutter off, and took his safety goggles off as well.
"Four times, they've called me four times today!" Rocket said, slamming his fist on the workbench, making all the smaller parts jump before landing back on the metal surface. He stared down at the screen to see Drax's contact picture on it.
"What does that overly-literal barbarian want?" Rocket snarled before answering.
"Look, Drax, I don't know what's so urgent that you just HAD to bother me on my day off. So that do you want!?" Rocket asked with an impatient and angry voice. All he got was Drax's screaming, as well as the shouting of some large animal with a roar similar to that of Godzilla's. Rocket then just hung up on him.
"That was... weird" said Rocket before he put his goggles back on and reactivated the plasma cutter, using it to seal the gun's seams for good. After giving the welded seams a good buffer, the weapon as all shiny and new.
"Alright, now let's test it out" Rocket said before he loaded the weapon up and pointed it at a large empty crate. Once he pulled the trigger, a large purple ball of lightning struck the crate and it turned completely to ashes, lying on the floor.
"Woah" Rocket said with his eyes wide. He had no idea what the weapon could do prior to fixing it up. But, now that he's made sure it works properly again and made it look shiny and chrome-like, it just became a new weapon they could use on the battlefield.
5:00 PM
Rocket was now in the living quarters of the ship, and in his paw was a glass of wine he got from a large cellar on the ship. He sat down on the black felt couch and took the remote up into his paw.
"Alright, it's my day off. No more annoying teammates to bother me, I have nothing else to worry about" said Rocket before turning the TV on.
"Today on 'Keeping up with the Kreedashians'" a voice on the TV said.
"Blech, boring" Rocket said before he changed the channel. Now it was on another reality program.
"And now back to 'Desperate Housewives of Xandar'" said another announcing voice.
"Geez, what is it with reality and holo-vision these days?" Rocket asked himself. He then changed the channel once more and it was now on an action movie. There was a large gunfight in the middle of a rocky terrain, and people were being blown up and shot left to right. One person got shot and fell off the edge of a cliff, letting out a Wilhelm scream as he fell, another guy got shot in the stomach and his entire midsection blew up. Rocket loved these kind of cheesy action movies with fake gore and bad acting.
"Now this, is more like it" Rocket said before he rested back on the couch and took a sip of his wine while watching the movie. One character got pinned against the side of a large rock with a truck that was being driven by another character, which made Rocket laugh a little before he took another sip of wine. Rocket's wrist computer began beeping again and he got so mad that he ignored the call and took off his wrist computer before he threw it across the room and landed on the floor next to the trash can.
"Can't a guy just watch a cheesy action flick on holo-vision in flarking peace? Jeez" Rocket said before he went back to watching the movie.
7:20 PM
The movie ended an hour and twenty minutes ago, and Rocket was now sitting on the couch, sitting in a criss-cross position while thumb wrestling himself and staring down at his lap. He had done just about everything he could think of. Clean Teen Groot's room, read that book, try out that sandwich recipe, work on that gun he found in the garbage, watched TV, he had run all out of ideas.
"Well, I'm bored" Rocket said to himself before letting out a loud yawn. Out of the corner of his eye, Rocket spotted something on the dining table right next to the kitchen island. He got off the couch and walked up to it to get a closer look.
"Peter's Zune? He left it here?" Rocket asked himself before he picked it up, unraveled the earbuds and put them in his ears. The raccoon then began scrolling through the music library on the device and looked through the songs, none of them were the old ones on the Walkman Peter used to own before Ego crushed it to bits.
"Never heard of these songs before" Rocket muttered before he spotted a song and pressed the button to play it. The song was called "I'm So Excited" and it was by a group called "The Pointer Sisters". The beat made Rocket's foot tap, and his shoulders swing. His tail began swaying left and right as well.
"Hmm, not bad" Rocket whispered to himself. Rocket then found himself dancing in the living area all by himself. Rocket replayed "I'm So Excited" three times, he even sang along to it as he danced to it on the second and third times. He saw his wrist computer ringing on the floor, he knew someone was trying to call him, but he just ignored it and kept on dancing to the music on the device.
8:00 PM
After Thirty minutes of dancing, Rocket turned Quill's Zune off, wrapped the earbuds' cord around it like it was before and placed it back on the dining table like it was where he found it.
"Well, that was fun" Rocket said, happy that he got to do something new and exciting for himself. But, he would keep that little 'Dance Party' to himself, and not let anyone else know about it, because Quill would yell at him for using his things without permission and accuse him of wanting to take it apart for parts for a new weapon, and he thought the others would laugh at him for dancing (something he hardly ever did, especially when there were others around him. Rocket heard a buzzing and he went over to the bridge to see what it was. He then saw on the monitors that Quill, Mantis, Drax, Gamora, and Teen Groot came back from their mission.
"Hey Rocket, we're back! Can you let us in?" asked Gamora politely into the intercom outside. Rocket pressed the button on the control panel and then spoke into the microphone that allowed him to talk to his friends outside.
"Yeah, hold on" Rocket replied before flipping the switch and the door flew open, which allowed everyone to come back inside. Rocket then went down to greet everyone.
"Hey guys, how was the, WOAH!" the raccoon said with his eyes wide. Everyone's clothes were in tatters, some minor cuts and bruises on their bodies, as well as some spots of ashes and soot on their skins.
"What happened to you guys?" asked Rocket.
"I am Groot (Translation: You don't wanna know)" Teen Groot said.
"Rocket, everyone would actually like to say something to you" Gamora said, grabbing Drax and Quill's arms and squeezing them.
"Ow! Ow! Come on, Jeez, Gamora!" Quill complained.
"This feels so much worse than having that space suit on!" Drax shouted.
"Apologize, all of you" Gamora ordered before letting them go.
"Rocket, we are really sorry about ringing you up constantly on your day off" Quill started.
"It was wrong of us, and we shouldn't have been bothering you on your, how you say 'Day Off'" Mantis continued.
"You work harder than any of us, and you deserved a break for once, and we just didn't give it to you" Drax piped in.
"I am Groot (Translation: We're Sorry)" Teen Groot concluded. Rocket took a deep breath and scratched himself behind the head.
"How can I stay mad at you guys? Sure, you're forgiven" said Rocket, accepting their apology. He then noticed something different about Mantis. Her skin had glowing green dimples on her forehead, cheeks, neck, arms, and antennae.
"What's wrong with you?" Rocket asked.
"Oh, I tried one of those green mushrooms" Mantis said before she scratched her face. Rocket's eyes widened.
"You ate a glowing green kudawaran mushroom! Didn't I tell you that eating one can give you glow in the dark acne!?" Rocket shouted.
"I thought you were pulling a 'Practical Joke" said Mantis.
"Why would I joke about something like that? And don't scratch it! Scratching's just gonna make it worse!" Rocket told her.
"I can't help it, the itching is very troublesome. I cannot stop!" Mantis said in a worrying tone, now scratching herself all over her body. Everyone just groaned and rolled their eyes in annoyance.
"Typical Mantis" Drax said, face-palming himself.
"I am Groot (Translation: Tell me about it)" the teenaged flora colossus said, also face-palming himself.
"Alright, look in the medicine cabinet in my bathroom, there should be an ointment to rub on your skin, that should soothe the pain for a few hours" Rocket instructed. Drax nodded and ran to Rocket's bathroom.
"I'll go get some painkillers" Quill said as he walked to the medical wing of the ship.
"I'll get a glass of water for her to drink when she takes the pills" Gamora said before walking into the kitchen.
9:00 PM
Rocket was now officially all tired out and walked into his room, locking the door behind him. In his paw was a mug of sleepytime tea. Sometimes whenever he had a hard time getting to sleep, Rocket would drink tea to soothe his nerves, but he would make an exception for tonight. After taking one last sip of tea, he placed the mug next to his alarm clock and went into the bathroom. He removed his pants and shirt, leaving him in his tighty whities before he brushed and flossed his teeth again. After that, Rocket turned the lights out and put his pajamas on before getting into bed.
"Thank flark, that's over" Rocket said before he could feel the full effects of the sleepytime tea take over his body. Now Rocket was peacefully sleeping, letting the excitement of everything that happened today fade away from his body.
A/N: The End! Hope everybody enjoyed that. It's been a while since I did a Guardians of the Galaxy one-shot so hopefully this was just as good as my other two ones I wrote back in 2014 back when the first movie came out. So yeah, that was "Rocket's Day Off". Anyways... Please review, thanks!