AN: I wrote this in seventh grade. It's painfully bad, I'm sorry. Don't be nice, actually, you can criticise the crap out of it for all I care.
Disclaimer: If it isn't already obvious, I own nothing, okay? NOTHING AT ALL. Got it? Good.
August 25, 1991
4:23 pm
Hello. You don't care about greetings do you? I don't even know why I'm writing this… Perhaps to document the mundane occurrences of my uninspired existence, but I'm failing to see the appeal of looking back upon these pages only to view the utter poignancy of my subsistence.
I suppose I'm being rather fatalistic, but I somehow doubt anything I undertake will alter the sheer tedium I'm forced to endure on a regular basis during the summer.
Sigh.
4:37 pm
Aside from the unrelenting monotony, I must admit to being... *shudder* glad that the summer is over. Horrifying, I know… I truly sicken myself.
I assure you, it's simply due to the fact that this summer… it has been dragging on longer than, well, last summer. I meant that sarcastically, not literally… I must say, though I don't doubt the past few months have literally been prolonged in some manner.
6:52 pm
I just reread my previous entry. Cripes. I have issues. Summer issues… Cynicism issues… Trust issues… Anger issues… Socialization issues… but mostly summer issues. It's not as if I'm just using that as some pathetic attempt to suppress some deep emotional trouble. No, no, no.
6:54 pm
No, no.
6:55 pm
NO.
11:31 pm
You're probably thinking I'm mentally unstable, but I'm not, so stop looking at me like that.
I mean it.
August 26, 1991
4:03 am
Ugh. No human being should be condemned to wake at four o'clock AM. I'm going back to sleep.
4:12 am
I'm beginning to fret… I believe a pest of some sort has infiltrated my quarters…
Now not only must I deal with my insanity- I mean, "summer issues," but also the duress of some creature skulking around my quarters.
Now I've just thought of… lethifolds.
Brilliant.
4:28 am
I hate boggarts.
And, I am going back to sleep.
3:34 pm
You know, sometimes I wonder how much better my life would be if I just stopped thinking. Thinking only seems to bring about problems including lethifolds that aren't there (No, I'm not hallucinating! Don't you go accusing me! You know perfectly well what I'm speaking of, so don't even act as if you do not.) And particularly uncomfortable encounters with certain stuttering turban-freaks on the street who stare at you, wide-eyed like a deer caught in headlights until you kindly request that they "Move, you before I avada you!" That quite adequately adjourned the aggravation of that situation.
People with some sense usually seem to avoid me on the street… hmmm.
7:55 pm
I have now been notified that Harry Potter will be attending Hogwarts this year… Oh joy. I suppose I still have some… resentment towards the… Potters. Well, I also suppose the Potters are really only the Potter, seeing as Voldemort (who came up with this "he-who-shall-not-be-named" idea? Personally I find that much more intimidating than "Voldemort" I will never understand people. ) killed James and… Never mind.
10:57 pm
This squalid "summer" existence of mine… I cannot bear to live through it for much longer.
I really am going insane. Oh well, I'd might as well enjoy this wave of insanity before it crashes.
11:01
On second thought, I'm going to go to sleep instead.
August 28, 1991
2:47 pm
Evidently there was a break-in at Gringotts on the 31st of July. Naturally, I'm just hearing about this now. I really should keep up with the Daily prophet, but that would give off the impression that I actually care what tiresome events transpire in the wizarding world. (Because the fact that Newt Scamander's Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them getting topped by some rubbish by Gilderoy Lockheart is really front page material [It was sarcasm journal, you know it was, there's no reason to contradict everything I say… er- write])
5:24 pm
All of the staff is required to be at Hogwarts by August thirtieth… Brilliant. At least that will bring a cease to these dreadful "summer issues."
6:30 pm
My life seems so utterly pointless these days… I just thought you should know.
8:07 pm
I am reading a muggle book called Wicked Plants. I must say I am immeasurably disappointed. The book contains nothing but a list of poisonous botanicals… I have thus far found nothing wicked about it. The content entirely contradicts the title. I don't understand muggle logic at all.
Honestly do they really want to know that a drop of extract from the castor plant is deadly, and related to the poinsettia? I know I do not. Not at all. I truly wonder what runs through the pathetic minds of these people…
1:13 am
Why do I have a feeling this year is not going go well? I don't know why exactly, but it just seems as if this year will… become a state of complete turmoil for some unknown reason. I am quite bothered by this… not so bothered, as I was when I learned Harry Potter was attending Hogwarts, but bothered nonetheless.
August 30, 1991
7:38 am
Hogwarts castle is just as unpleasant as always. In addition to Potter attending this year, Draco Malfoy will be as well. Delightful pair. Narcissa is unpleasant enough (much more sane than Bellatrix by far, but still terribly irritating); I cannot bear to imagine this son of hers. A spoiled, self centered, miniature jerk no doubt…
9:21 am
This is an outrage! Guess who was passed over for Defense Against the Dark Arts… AGAIN? Me. Yes, me. I got passed over for Defense Against the Dark Arts yet again, in favor of the stuttering-deer-in-headlights-turban freak. Quirinus Quirrell is now the teacher for Defense Against the Dark Arts. Fantastic. The fool possesses about the same amount of talent as my left toenail. That position has eluded me for years, but mark my words, one day it will be mine.
Until that day, here's to yet another dull year of potions, hoorah.
12:49 pm
I hate start-of-the-year staff meetings. They always amount to nothing at all. Nothing I tell you! Much of it was actually spent avoiding Albus, who was shoving these small yellow sweets called "Lemon drops" down everyone's throats. I must say though, they aren't half bad…
Ahhgh! What am I saying? The meeting was horrible and no good came out of it whatsoever. The only other occurrence was Septima Vector's usual "I hate you." Directed at yours truly.
This, of course, was followed by my ever-so-clever retort of "Aren't you pleasant today- for a high-handed ditz." Actually that sounded rather pathetic, but nonetheless she grew red in the face and stormed off at a near-stomping gait, so the intended reaction was reached. Still, as she stormed away, she muttered something like "He'd be better of as a recluse," or something like that. Not that I care… Because I don't care. I hate that high-handed ditz. Why would I care? I wouldn't... Ditz.
3:48 pm
Still not caring.
3:54 pm
Or dwelling on anything…
3:57 pm
Nothing at all.
7:03 pm
Ditz.
September 1, 1991
11:20 am
No wonder I had a feeling this year would be awful! I just received a full list of the incoming first-years, and the group sounds like murder! In addition to Potter and Malfoy, Ronald Weasley will be attending. There is absolutely no way he could possibly be worse than those twin brothers of his… If he was worse than those two, there's no way he could have eluded being locked up in Azkaban by now.
Potter's expected attendance of Hogwarts has really been gaining some notoriety throughout the wizarding world. I am honestly puzzled by how amazed people are by the mere mention of his name… It's as if he single-handedly killed Voldemort with nothing but some shoe polish and a wooden spoon! I don't see what all the bother is about.
2:27
Guess what?
2:28
I still hate Vector.
2:29
I really do.
2:30
With a passion.
6:49
That's enough about vector though, because I hate her, and nothing I say that is related to is germane to the topic at hand, which is the incoming first-year students… although some of them may take her Arithmancy class, so I suppose it is pertinent in that sense.
Anyhow, I must expound to you exactly how much I hate that bitter squib, Filch… and his cat, Mrs. Norris… I hate them more than Harry Potter; I hate them more than the name "Snivellus"; I even hate them more than Septima Vector for Merlin's sake! The two of them skulk furtively around the castle day and night searching for anyone who could possibly be doing something out of order… what's so odd about this now is that there aren't even any students here. Their issues are worse than mine… That's really saying something. *Shudder*
That cat… is a little fiend. She follows me around, as if she's waiting for me to do something questionable, so she can go alert her beloved Filch of the development.
Have I ever told you how much I hate that cat? Oh well, I'm going to tell you again. She's seriously up there with Sirius Black, James Potter, and Septima Vector. I really hate that cat.
Goodbye.