Hikari dies and comes back to life on ffnet X.O

Ok ok, I'm writing this oneshot christmas fic because it's christmas eve and I'm in a random mood to write...I just got inspired by a pic on DA and my hands are forcing me to write it

To rationalize all of this, I will point out that this takes place before Raito re-obtains the deathnote while he's still handcuffed to L.

oh yeah, there may be a bit of fluff...but that's because i'm itching to write something cute

The supressed sound of crinkling paper echoed through the hotel room, going unheard to it's few tenants. Most of the task force had all gone home to be with their families for the holiday, leaving only the two who were trapped under L's unceasing watch. The pair was still suspects in his mind, as his stubborness would not falter. Once the detective convinced himself of an idea, letting it go would not be easy.

Misa had retired to her own room early that night, hoping to look nothing less then perfect for the next day, as if she expected much to happen. L himself had even taken the oppurtinuty to get a few hours of sleep, which Raito had seldom seen him do. He nearly had to drag the pale boy out of the computer chair, for L had still half a mind to keep working on the case, even on christmas eve. The light haired teen had presents to wrap, and didn't have enough room to complete it with all of the files that littered the work space. Everyone had been sloppy that day, in a hurry to rush away from work, using the holiday as an excuse. L had made no moves to organise the mess. Apparently the day meant nothing much to him, for he had still not wanted to remove the handcuffs even as the fair haired boy had gone christmas shopping. He must of had one hell of a hunch that Raito was indeed Kira, scince he appeared rather uncomfortable in public yet still forced himself to be there. All eyes had atleast once passed his way, staring at the strangeness that was the detective. L was not a people person. He merely dragged behind the colledge student, one hand in his pocket, the other thumb pressed to his lip as he observed silently, minus the occasional question or comment about what Raito was buying and who it was for. L seemed almost curious about it all, making the other boy wonder if he had ever celebrated christmas- or anything festive in that matter.

L seemed like the kind who had been confined to a room to do nothing else but become a genious all of his life. He was reserved, and didn't seem to care about anything but cases...and sweets. Everything he did was completely bizare, as if he didn't have anyone to care exactly what he looked like. His hair was unruly, his shadowed eyes darkening his character, his horrible posture...not to mention his deathy pale skin, which appeared to be untouched by the sun. It was almost as if he was too paranoid to venture into the outside world from the safety of the indoors. Was L scared of society?

Even if he was, the dark eyed boy always seemed collected and calm. At times, his eyes would light up when things were in his favor, such as important evidence proving his theories, yet any other time they remained free of any emotion at all. Though L got on his nerves with the constant implying that he was kira, Raito pitied him slightly. Something about the boy definately seemed haunted enough, like he had never been looked upon except for as one of the greatest detectives of all time. He obviously had no one to care about him, no one to give him the love that would have lightened his personality and helped him to mature normaly...Because he either hadn't matured or some of that childishness refused to leave. At times, Raito wanted to smack his thumb away from his mouth, and tell him how grown-ups dont suck their thumbs. He wanted to tell him that cake will make you fat(although L was as skinny as a twig), and that the objects that he held (what looked like) cautiously with two fingers wouldn't bite him. Though L could figure out almost anything, it was as if the physical part of his mind hadn't changed to that of an adult. Everything about his demeanor screamed "child," yet the brown eyed boy understood in a way.

There was definately a lot more to L then being a genious.

Skilled fingers quietly wrapped the silver box that lay on the coffee table, casting a nervous glance at the dark haired boy who dosed while sitting in that awkward position on the couch. He was slightly relieved to not oogled by that intense stare that L always gave him. It was almost piercing, the way that the dark haried boy looked at him, even if he didn't really mean it. The detective was used to studying everything objectively, careful not to let anything slip past his focus. Though one thing his expert mind couldn't comprehend is that some people feel uncomfortable having his eyes boring into their souls. And the over talking of the theory that Raito and Misa were the two kiras that changed the world was obsurd! Why did he feel the need to try and prove that his only two friends in the world were mass murderers? If he was kira, he's know it! Unless he was subcontiously killing criminals without being aware of it, which he had already proved he wasn't, then there was no way! And personally, Raito didn't believe Misa had it in her to do be either of the Kiras...Too ditzy.

Through all the weirdness, some of his flaws proved to be otherwise. Though his eyes seemed hollow at times, they also had innocence in them- accompanied by his childishness. As well as that, his character appeared to be sloppy, when in reality he handled things so delicately, always careful. And though he looked a bit creepy, overall he also seemed...a bit attractive to the boy. His skin was light but it contrasted with his other features and made them stand out more. His dark hair framed his face adourningly, never looking perfect but matching his eyes in a pleasant manner...Raito wouldn't have it any other way. What about his lips...The brick brown haired boy felt heat rise to his cheeks as he cast a nervous glance in the sleeping boy's direction. With a quick shake of his head, Raito regained his composure, continuing the work on that particular present. Brushing a stray lock of auburn hair out of his eyes, he sealed the remaining end with the clear tape and gazed at it silently, pondering how it was he would go about giving his gift. There was really no way he'd be able to just hand it over casually.

"Is Yagami-kun almost done?"

Slightly suprised by the voice, Raito nearly gasped and turned his head towards the other boy who seemed to have awoken silently within a few seconds; The colledge student hadn't even heard a sound. Quickly, recomposing himself, he nodded. "Yeah. I just finished."

Those darkened eyes were wide and immersive again, all drowziness within them lost as now they focused completely on the boy sitting beside him. A pale thumb ran thoughtfully over his lip and his mind began ticking again, no short then the top speed.

"Yagami-kun, we should get back to work." That soft voice seemed to urge him strongly as he shifted his position slightly to face the other boy. His long hair swayed softly in his movement, tickling his cheeks as those eyes continued to look up at him attentively. It took all Raito had to keep a strait face as he gazed upon him, his hands gripping the gold wrapped present a bit tighter.

"Iie, Ryuuzaki...It's Christmas eve. I think we should get some rest tonight." He said casually, subcontiously setting the gift on his lap to grip his knees and look back in the others direction. If only he could find the right moment, without totaly destroying the character he'd worked so hard to build around the muddy eyed boy.

For a minute, the boy seemed to stare right through him. Raito was almost scared to think, fearing that somehow L would tap into his mind and discover all of his secrets- all of his feelings. Secretly, he knew that what he feared more then anything that moment was...well...the boy not seeing him as anything other then a suspect in the kira case. He hated when things didn't go his way. He was just as stubborn as L...

Finally, the pale hand slipped from his lips and gripped his knee as L lowered his head to meet his hands. He seemed to hesitate for a minute, giving a slight lick of his lips before he spoke. "Kira is a murderer who's killing even as we speak. We can't afford to waste time."

After a few moments more of silence, the slender detective moved to stagger to his feet, before pausing reluctantly and moving his head towards the other boy. "As well as that..." He faltered, that childish tone appearing in his eyes as he looked away for an instant, before meeting the questioning look once again. "...As quick as possible, I want to convince everyone that Yagami-kun isn't Kira."

"But I already have proved that." Raito argued calmly, feeling himself relieved yet slightly agitated. "The only one left who still thinks I'm Kira is you."

"I know."

I want to convince everyone that Yagami-kun isn't Kira...

'So it's not that he wants to suspect me...' Raito thought sadly, giving a small nibble on his lower lip. 'I guess I must have the brain power to be kira...I have to prove to him somehow that I'm not...'

The wide eyes found their way towards to floor again as L made another move to get up. This time, however, the light haired boy took the moment to his advantage. Carefully, he grabbed the boys arm and pulled him back down. "Yagami-kun, what th-" The other boy questioned as he was dragged back onto the cough, slightly thrown off his normal stance yet as silenced as Raito pressed a finger to his lips. Enclosing his fingers around the present, he inwardly held his breath before finally placing it into L's lap.

The detective seemed suprised, appearing as though he had almost been completely caught off guard. A look of shock was clear across his face, a pointer finger gliding to his mouth in thought as he looked back and forth between the gold wrapped box and the other boy. He slowly climbed back into his infamous sitting position, a bit of color appearing in his cheeks which he took no notice towards. It was a while before he made any other movement, before finally his eyes rested on the box, which he gingerly gripped with both hand's thumbs and index fingers and held it up for examination. He cast a glance in Raito's direction with such confusion in his eyes that it almost wrenched the student's heart as he watched him quietly. He began to ponder the other boy and his strange behavior towards an action as simple as being handed a christmas present...it was then that he was positive that the reserved detective had never celebrated a holiday before that time.

L eventually broke the akward silence, his imploring bewildered eyes still stunned with the unexpectantcy of being handed a gift. "Yagami-kun..."

"Open it Ryuuzaki." Raito urged, making a nudging motion with his head. "Have you ever gotten a present before?"

The dark demeanored boy said nothing as his attention turned to fondling the gift, turning it in his fingers and scanning his eyes over every inch of it. "I have not..." He admitted quietly, a hint of sadness in his voice that the chestnut haired boy couldn't ignore. He scooted closer to the pale genious, slowly wrapping his arms around him and pulling his into a comforting embrace. L's eyes widened and he stiffened at the contact, new to him still as he had no idea how to respond to such an action. Though uncertain how the other boy would react, Raito didn't care. His friend needed attention...no, he needed more then just that. He needed someone to hold him, to nurture him, to see him as more then "L."

L, no, Ryuuzaki needed love.

Raito had never been good at showing such feelings, yet for this moment he felt as though he needed to let down his guard for the sake of the boy who he held in his arms. "I'm sorry Ryuuzaki...You really deserve a thousand presents, hell, just a lot more then this." The brown eyed boy rambled on, expressing his thoughts without fully thinking them through, just trying to get through to the other boy. "I know you feel like you're only purpose is to remain hidden away to solve cases with no real credit towards your being...but...I think that you're more then just L, you're a human being who has physical needs. It's like you've never been cared about before...Ryuuzaki...that makes me sad...and makes me want to change all of that..."

The shadowed eyed boy's hands clenched the present in his hands while his arms still hugged his knees, his body beginning to tremble lightly. For once, he couldn't find the words to say, just let himself be held. It was so different, yet it felt so good to feel the warmth of another being, and one who wanted him to be happy at that. "Raito-kun..." Was all he could say, suprise dominating his normal line of thought. Slowly, the wild haired boy began to relax in his arms, his head falling against his chest. For the first time in his life, L truely felt cared for...not to mention he felt like he mattered. Perhaps for just this one day, he could let himself be thought of as more then just a simple alias. An odd feeling appeared in his chest, tears spilling from his eyes and cascading down his light toned cheeks- so light in fact, that Raito wouldn't have noticed if he had sucessfully supressed the sob that wracked his body.

A bit suprised, the russet haired boy looked down and pulled away slightly, not fully expecting a reaction such as that. "I-I'm sorry!" He stuttered, his face going red with embarassment. "I didn't mean to upset you!"

"N-no." L shook his head, more tears spilling from his wide eyes which darted in different directions, as if trying to analyze the situation as best as his genious mind would allow him. "It's not you...I just...I-I..." He stammered, unable to produce the right words to respond. He didn't understand the feelings of sadness, pain, and love that were washing over him...nor did he understand the tears. He had never cried before in his life, and to suddenly burst into tears after being given affection...was that all he ever wanted?

The light haired boy could assume that it was L's first time letting his emotions show, it was written all over his face. The puzzlement was clear as day, as was his attempts to explain himself. Not giving him the chance, he snaked his arms around the boys waist, earning a small gasp of suprise from L as he pulled him into his lap. Taking the golden present from his hands, Raito set it beside him, cradling the childish boy in his grasp. Soothingly, he rocked him back and forth, petting his dark untamed hair softly, whispering to him gently as the boy let his tears flow. He cried on and on, his face buiried into the chest of the lighter haired boy, clenching his shirt, releasing his pain for all the years where he had only been seen as an object of investigation and nothing more then that. Raito continued to hold him, full knowing that his simple actions could not launder the odd boy's bizarity, nor could it erase all that had happened to him throughout his life. What he did know was that a mere amount of love could provide the boy with the ability to understand exactly what it felt like to be cared for. He kissed his forehead, never releasing his grip on him, cupping his cheek in a loving manner, stroking it lightly with his thumb. He would be there for him, he would be the one that L seeked comfort from.

The smaller of the duo's crying began to falter and his sobs faded into hiccups after a long while. They sat in silence while his breathing slowly returned to normal, silence overtaking the room once again. He appeared exhausted, the overflowing of emotion obviously wearing it out after many years of disregarding them. L shifted his head away from him, sniffing and pouting stubbornly to make up for the dignity he had lost while letting down his personal defensive barriers. Raito had to laugh at how much he reminded him of a child- especially with the cuteness.

"You'll never be alone again..." He said softly, moving his hand to the boys chin to pull their gazes together. Tears fell upon his hand as Raito inched his face towards the boy's. Almost in slow motion, their lips joined together in a moment which neither of them forgot. Their eyes fell closed, the situation becoming less akward as it carried on. The pale boy's grip on his shirt strengthened as the intensity grew, deepening the kiss while the other boy's hands fell from his back to down his arms, past the loosely hung handcuffs, clutching his wrists at the end. Thier fingers slowly entertwined until their hands were connected tightly, the lighter haired boy using that bond to pull the other closer to his chest. L seemed to be completely entranced my the magic that that kiss contained to complain about his actions, even when the tanner pair of hands pulled away from his own and slipped under the white cotton shirt, traveling up and down his back. The dark haired boy gripped his arms as he moaned into the other boy's mouth, Raito using the moment to slip in his tongue. The other boy could merely fight for dominance against the overtaking foreign presence that wished to search his cavern and claim it for his own. Getting slightly dizzy from the lack of air, he eventually surrendered and gave in to the taller boy, letting him do as he wish. Realising that L's battling had gone weak and that he too needed air, Raito broke the kiss.

The two panted, catching their breath as they held each others arms, glympsing into what seemed like each others souls. The firey passion of their love glinted in the pair's eyes, bringing the warm sparkle of happiness that Raito had never seen before to the smaller of them. The detective nuzzled his face into the light haired student's neck, smiling cutely as he pulled away and looked back at him, a blush creeping across his face. Raito felt his own cheeks heat up at the sight, his actions were just too adorable for him to shrug it off. Snapping his head away so the other boy wouldn't see, his gaze fell upon the abandoned box. "Ah, Ryuuzaki, you forgot about your present," Raito remembered, re-handing the gold-wrapped box to the boy who has climbed beside him, back in that strange sitting position.

L took the present with a smile and a total of four fingers, searching for an openable end to start at. Slipping an index finger under one of the corners, he ripped the paper upwards, eyes going wide and turning in the other boys direction. He looked scared and almost disapointed in himself. "I'm sorry Raito-kun, I messed up your present..."

The said boy couldn't help but laugh. "No no. You're supposed to rip the paper, it doesn't matter. The point of wrapping it is to make what's inside a suprise."

"Oh..." Thinking about this for a minute, the pale boy turned back to the present and continued slowly ripping the paper, almost flinching at it's unfortunate destruction. Holding the silver box in one hand, he slipped the rest of the wrapping off of the box and set it beside him, Raito watching with a smile. Resting the shallow box on his knees, he lifted the top, peering shyly into the dark mysteries that it held inside-

"Chocolate!" A grin crossed his face, eyes lighting up like a child who had gotten that one toy what they had double underlined on their list to santa. "Oh Raito-kun!" His eyes closed in delight as he popped a piece into his mouth(needing his sugar fix after all of that crying) and he threw his arms around his friend's neck happily. "What better present is there besides chocolate?"

"You." Raito replied, wrapping an arm around his waist and planting a kiss on his lips. "You taste sweeter then any chocolate out there." The dark eyed boy blushed, setting the sweets on the coffee table, resting his head against his love's shoulder. The chestnut eyed boy unexpectedly leaned backwards on the couch, bringing the other boy with him. L "oofed" as he fell into Raito's chest, now laying on top of the boy who was stretched out across the surface. The colledge student carried out his actions casually, tightly hugging the suprised teenager close to him.

The dark eyed boy merely snuggled against him, tilting his head upwards to look upon his love. He located the taller boy's hand, pulling it to his cheek. "Is it ok if I go to sleep on Raito-kun?" He asked timidly, his thumb moving to his lip cutely, eyes like dark chocolate filling with curiousity.

The boy could merely smile as his hand touched the other boys cheek, stroking his face lightly. "Of course you can. I wouldn't have it any other way."

Silence dominated the room. It had seemed as though L had already dosed off on the short haired boy, who lay his head back, closing his own eyes and taking in the sound of his friend's breathing. Usually the room was bustling with people, arguments were taking place...the room was hardly ever inactive, and the serene quietness was relieving. Sighing deeply, the son of the police cheif was grateful for the much needed holiday...

"Hey Raito-kun?"

The named boy lifted his head to meet the no longer piercing L's gaze, which had melted like chocolate in the affectionate embrace what had comforted him. "Yes Ryuuzaki?" He asked with a smile, though he had thought that the shadowed eyed boy had already fallen asleep.

L wore a smile on his face, his cheeks flushed slightly as he looked shyly upon Raito's curious face. "I love you."

The taller of the pair's heart nearly skipped a beat as he spoke those words. Was it just him, or did he totaly unlock the door to the boy's heart in just short of an hour? Inwardly calling himself a master of love, he returned the smile, reaching up to tuck dark bangs behind his ear and out of those shadowed eyes. "I love you too." He replied purely from his wild beating heart, leaning up to lock lips with his love. He leaned back and dragged L down with him as he made another hint at the fact that it was late as they pulled away. The childish one giggled as he understood the others yawn, laying his head down once again. "Merry christmas Raito-kun." He said with a yawn, snuggling deeper into the arms of the one who held him, dried his tears, helped him to feel...

Raito lay in silence, his eyes cast heavenward, glazed over in thought. His hand subcontiously stroked the boy's dark hair, his other arm wrapped securely around his waist lovingly. Things had gone exactly how he had wanted...L had decided to love him back. Raito always got what he wanted. And what he wanted was L.

Exactly as planned.

"Merry christmas Ryuuzaki."

Even without the deathnote, Raito always had a mysterious personality to me.

This is hikari's first death note fanfic...hell, this is my first fanfic in a while. I started writing on here when i was like 10. I am 15 now...yeah, my writing has changed drastically...yeah, i'm deleting a bunch of the old stuff, it's all sucky. Expect more shounen ai and yaoi crap coming from me. I also write my own original stories...they're mostly yuri.

By the way Raito(Light)xL(Ryuuzaki) is my favorite DN pairings, and one of my overall favorite yaoi pairings. Come on! th-the handcuffs!