Prologue: Peace Talks Gone Wrong
It was a stormy night, and all of Equestria was sound asleep, except for those at Canterlot Palace. There was a peace talk going on between four beings of great power, each with their own agenda on the table. They were Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, Queen Chrysalis, Queen of the Changelings, and Discord, Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony. I was there in the room to make sure nothing violent happened between the four. My name is Joshua, aka Poison, former Spartan of Shadow, and Hero of Equestria. I had saved Equestria from the chaotic Discord, along with some help. I carefully watched the debate, cleaning my Porter's X2 Ray Gun, DarkEdge, inspecting my R.A.R. Black Ops Edition, and checking my mini Mystery Box.
"Look, I don't give a hoot about these sanctions you're putting on my Changelings, Celestia! They're too much! We're Equestrians too, you know! We have RIGHTS!" Chrysalis said angrily about a proposal Celestia had imposed on her people. Sadly, I had to agree with Chrysalis. They were a little harsh on her people.
"Discord, why haven't you said anything? You're not the silent type." Luna said, observing Discord's silence. I did indeed notice that. I listened as the wind howled, and the rain beat down on the Palace. I could've sworn I heard multiple break-ins, but the wind was too loud, so I ignored it.
"Look, Lulu, I really don't know why y'all wanted me here in the first place. Peace talks, really? We really aren't going to get nowhere if we keep bickering like this. Can we all just get along? And that's from the Spirit of Chaos! And why is he here? He's not even in a position of power, the little Hero. And I could have sworn I heard break-ins." Discord said, pointing toward me sitting in a chair with my weapons and Mini Mystery Box.
"Poison's here to offer extra security. And he gladly agreed to join us in the room, since I wouldn't allow our guards in here. It must've been the storm, Discord, just focus." Celestia replied, staring down Discord.
"But, Discord has a point. If y'all keep bickering and imposing harsh rules on each other, we aren't going to get nowhere." I spoke up, backing up Discord.
"Discord and Poison, my special someone, are right. If we keep bickering, this might as well be our war conference." Chrysalis said, winking at me. I blushed slightly. I saw Luna glaring at Chrysalis. She must've been jealous of Chrysalis' remark about me. A loud banging on the door was heard. I raised my Ray Gun, and crept to the door. I put my ear to it and listened for any noise. I heard moaning and hissing. That meant… crap.
"Zombies. In Equestria. Just what I needed. Well, ladies and gentleman, we have to postpone the talk. We need to get out of here, fast." I said, facing the group, who looked at each other and laughed.
"Zombies? That's just a legend, Joshua. A story made to scare young fillies. Let's keep talking." Luna said, smiling at me.
'They don't believe me.' I thought. The door banged again, and a small chunk fell off. I looked through and a small horde of guard zombies outside the room, trying to gain access.
"Guys, I really think we should leave. Are there any secret passages, or another door?" I said, going to my Perk Cooler, where I stashed Perk Drinks, all of them, Juggernog, Double Tap, Speed Cola, Quick Revive, Mule Kick, and Stamin-Up. I quickly drank the four basic ones, plus Mule Kick and Stamin-Up.
"Uh, why is there a hoof clawing its way through the door?" Luna said, pointing at the door.
"Uh, maybe Poison's right. There is something on the other side of that door, and it ain't friendly." Discord said, grabbing a Stakeout from my Mystery Box, and readying it. He even grabbed a Colt Python and the four basic Perks.
"Ooh, I feel good now, really good, as though I could cause a lot of CHAOS." Discord chuckled. The door cracked again, and another chunk fell off. I slung my Mystery Box over my back, shrunk my Perk Cooler, put it in my bag, sheathed my sword, and slung my R.A.R. Black Ops over my shoulder. I quickly pulled Colt M1911s out of my bag and handed them to the girls, along with a bunch of clips. They picked them up using magic, and loaded them, stashing the clips on bandoliers I gave them.
"What are we going to do with these?" Celestia asked, as the door cracked again.
"Simple, my dear Celestia, you kill the zombies, and restore peace to Equestria! Then, we continue the peace talks, okay?" I said, as the door finally came down.