Denial

Disclaimer: Gundam Seed is not mine, no matter how much I dream.

A/N: This is a sequel to my other story twisted. You don't need to read that story to understand this one but, still it may help you understand what's going on…maybe?

You're lying!

That is the phrase that echoes in my mind as I stare at you numbly. You're lying to me, a joke, yes a joke that's all it is. You can't be serious, there is no way, you love me, and we are in love, married! There is no possible way that what you say is truth.

Then why are you looking at me like that?

If there is no truth behind what you say then why are your eyes so pleading, so honest. Why is your voice so serious? Why do you avert your eyes away from mine so guilt ridden?

Is it true?

I place my hands over my ears and shake my head as if to chase away the thought.

"YOU'RE LYING! IT ISNT TRUE! STOP IT! IT'S NOT FUNNY!" I shout but I don't hear myself I don't hear anything. As if the entire world has stopped. The only indication that I was yelling is the growing pain in my throat.

Your hands are on me, trying to calm me down, but it isn't working. How can you even dare to touch me after what you just said?

Even if it is a lie.

"Athrun…" I whisper as I finally come back to reality and look at you. Your beautiful face worried and sad, why are you sad? It just a joke, a silly humorous joke you and Kira are playing...right?

I look over you shoulder my brother giving me the respected distance I want. He seems to understand that I don't want to touched, unlike you. He understands me better and that makes me mad. Perhaps it's just a twin thing but you are my husband the love of my life. Why is it that you can't understand me? Why can't you tell when I need space and when I need a hug? Is that so hard to learn?

I feel anger and betrayal irrupt inside of me as I stare at my twin. He looks me in the eyes his soul tearing eyes burning into my amber ones. If there is truth behind this then it's his fault! He made you say this! He used his connection and understanding of you to twist your mind into saying such things.

I glare hatefully at him ignoring everything you say to me. Why would you listen to him?

He is just you best friend, I'm your wife! What is the hold he has on you that is so stronger that not even me "the goddess of victory" can't break it or in the very least weaken it?

Is he better than me? Do you wish I was more like him? Quiet, sweet, sensitive, intelligent, strong, caring, generous, as I list off the things in my mind I come to a conclusion that I knew all along in the back of my head.

I'm jealous.

Jealous of my twin brother

He is everything I'm not, why shouldn't you listen to him? I push the thought away there is no way. No way that you would favor him over me! You love me! ME! Not him!

"Cagalli please say something." you beg. I don't turn my gaze from Kira though. Kira is silent but is eyes are telling me everything you aren't.

"Why...?" I hear the word escaping my mouth before I can stop it. Why did I ask that? I need no explanation. You lying after all, there is none.

"I love him."

I feel anger rise up again and I turn to snap at you.

"STOP LYING!"

You look at me in the eye this time, guilt there but over shadowed by something else, something stronger, love, but it isn't directed at me.

"I'm not lying, please forgive me." You say in a low tone and look at my brother your gaze affectionate, so much so that I feel sick.

Turning to my brother I direct my anger at him, it's his fault. He is the one that made you think that these lies you sputter out are actual facts.

"Bastard! How could you! What did you do? What did you tell him? Why is he lying to me? Tell me!" I shout coming over to Kira to wrap my hands around his collar and shake him as hard as I can. He remains still his legs staying sturdy, his coordinator strength over powering my natural.

"Cagalli." I look up at my name being called and I look into his your again and I find my answer but I refuse to believe it.

"You did something. I know you did! You, you, tricked him, seduced him!" I shout after all it was all possible. I mean we have the same face, being twins, though it is hard to notice, my pale skin the opposite of his tan, his bright violet eyes over powering my duller amber, my blond hair contradicting to his brown but still we have the same face.

Why wouldn't you be able to seduce you? You is attracted to me, so why not you? Then does that mean you favor him over me in both fields of love and lust? Do you prefer the tan skin and brown hair to my face? Yes my face, because you love me not him!

"I'm sorry Cagalli." I look at my brother hatefully. Raising my hand I struck him as hard as I can and watch as his head swings to the left a bit from the force of my slap.

I watch as a red mark forms on his cheek, if I mutilate his pretty face will you love him then? Perhaps if I spit hatful words at him his guilt will take over and he will cry. Cry because he feels sorry, then you can see how pathetic he is. He may have piloted the Freedom but he is weak inside. I'm not, so you should favor me, you do favor me, this manipulative monster who all thinks is so innocent just made you think other wise.

"Cagalli don't!" I hear you shout angrily. You're upset that I hit him; you're upset that I would hurt him.

"Get out" I whisper dropping my hands away from Kiras collar. I don't want to see any of you. I have had enough of these lies.

"Cagalli…" one of you whispers but I am unable to determine who, I'm shaking with rage. I can't think, I can't breath.

"LEAVE! NOW BOTH OF YOU! I DON'T WANT TO SEE EITHER OF YOU AGAIN!" I scream dropping to my knees on the floor.

Neither of you say anything. Kira motions for you not to talk and leave silently. He knows that I can bare the sound of your voice right now, why does he know that? Why can't you know it? Why can't you understand me the why he understands me or the way you understand him? Why cant you love me the way you told me you love him? The way you suppose to love me!

The door closes and you leave with him. You walk out of my office the same way you walked out of my heart. Silent, with someone else, and with so much of love for another person that there is no room for me.

Tears are dripping down my face and I don't mind. No is around to see them. You aren't around to see how pathetic I look; deep sobs rack my chest as I stutter out the last thing I have to say to you.

"You can stop lying now."

A/N: Like I said this is the sequel to Twisted. I hoped you liked it. Sorry to any AsuCag fans out there I love the pairing too but Athrun and Kira are my favorite. Hoped you all enjoyed it and if not, well I guess you can flame, but it's not going to change anything.