Hey so, we all know Mokona is genderless, but if I say "he" every now and again just know that I refer to Mokona as a "he" whenever gender specific pronouns are used.

So this is just a little drabble from Mokona's POV. It's not too interesting or entertaining, but thank you to anyone who reads it anyway.

If Happiness Could Come Back

It was quiet. It was always quiet at night now. Before, (before Tokyo, when Syaoran had changed, and the other Syaoran had appeared and everything(I) had changed) the nights weren't always so quiet and peaceful. Fai would wake up in the middle of the night, and Mokona always knew because Kurogane's loud voice would ring through wherever they were staying, waking everyone else up as he shouted for Fai to go back to sleep. Sakura and Mokona would stay up late, chatting into the night. The whole group would drink, going crazy as they shouted and laughed.

Now, here in Infinity, things were different. The nights were always quiet, but peaceful defintely wasn't the next word Mokona would use to describe them. Everyone was quiet with tension, not peace. There was tension between Kurogane and Fai, and tension between Syaoran and Sakura, and Mokona hated it so much.

On this night, Mokona was up later than usual. The others were all asleep, resting up for the next chess battle tomorrow. Mokona hated those chess battles. Watching everyone go off to fight, knowing they would come back hurt...Mokona didn't like it at all. So, instead of sleeping, Mokona went from room to room, checking on the sleeping human travelers.

Mokona's first stop was Sakura. The Princess, previously an enormous sleep tosser, was as still as a stone. This was for two reasons. One, her injured leg no longer gave her that sort of freedom. And two, she was different. Mokona had a feeling the reason she had tossed and turned so much before was because her dreams were very active, full of fun things, and as a result, she moved in real life. Now, Mokona knew her dreams were probably darker, more still, full of sadness. Like Sakura herself. The only one she really talked to anymore was Fai, and the rest of the time, she was up in her room, probably crying and thinking about Syaoran.

If Mokona could help Sakura, then he would bring back Syaoran. As long as he was gone, Sakura could never be the same. Mokona wasn't sure he could either. The thought of Syaoran out there, alone, under the control of some evil monster...tears started gathering in Mokona's eyes just thinking about it. Mokona wanted Syaoran back so badly.

The next stop was Fai's room. Fai too, was changed. Before Tokyo, Fai was always smiling, and laughing, and trying to get the rest of them to smile and laugh too. And Mokona knew that some of it had been an act. But Mokona also knew that as time had gone on, Fai had started to smile for real. He began to really enjoy himself. Not anymore.

Now, Fai, while still polite, was much more open with his hostility. In regards to Kurogane, anyway. To Sakura, Syaoran, and Mokona, Fai was kind, and polite, with only a touch of chill in his voice. But Mokona could still hear the old Fai in there. With Kurogane, it wasn't like that at all. Fai was calling him by his full name, and treating him coldly, always speaking to him with a slight anger. And even though he was hiding it, Mokona knew it hurt Kurogane for Fai to treat him this way.

If Mokona could help Fai, he would find out what it was that Fai was hiding from them, that made him want to die so badly, so badly that he wouldn't forgive Kurogane for saving his life. Then Mokona would fix whatever that was, so that Kurogane and Fai could go back to the way they had been.

Syaoran's room came next. When this Syaoran had first appeared, in the middle of all that chaos in Tokyo, Mokona hadn't known right away how to feel about him. Was he bad? He was fighting Syaoran, who Mokona cherished as much as the others, so he had to be bad, right? Then again, Syaoran himself...he had just hurt Fai...very badly. Mokona hadn't known what to think at all, so at that moment in time, all Mokona did was scream and cry. But Mokona realized quickly that this Syaoran was a good person, a lonely person, and he needed them badly.

So Mokona was trying hard to be there for Syaoran, because he needed a friend. Sakura, so unlike herself, but understandably, was very awkward around him, and kind of cold. Fai wasn't mean to him, but he spent all his free time with Sakura. Only Kurogane was being friendly with this new Syaoran, and treating him like it was okay that he was there.

Syaoran was moving his sleep, and Mokona could hear him mumbling. Mokona thought he was probably saying, "Sakura," but didn't go in to find out.

Mokona's final stop was the couch that Kurogane was sitting on, still awake. When the ninja saw the pork bun, he inclined his head in Mokona's direction.

"What are you still doing up?"

"Mokona could ask the same of Kuro-wan!" Mokona said, trying to seem cheerful. Like the last few minutes hadn't been spent thinking of the dark moment that lay behind them.

"Just couldn't fall asleep." replied Kurogane, not getting mad at the silly nickname, like he used to. Mokona knew that was because he was hurt that Fai had stopped calling him by them.

"Mokona either."

Mokona hopped onto the couch, next to Kurogane. It was silent for a couple seconds, and, for almost a moment, all those scary, sad thoughts vanished. But then, they came back, and Mokona couldn't stop the tears that gathered and began to fall. Kurogane looked down, wide-eyed in shock.

"Why are you crying, pork bun?" he asked, not unkindly.

"Because Mokona...is useless..And can't do anything. Mokona couldn't do anything to save Fai, or Syaoran, and now Mokona can't do anything to make everyone happy again."

"Hey." said Kurogane, picking Mokona up and looking in it's eyes. "I couldn't do anything either. Does that make me useless?"

Mokona shook it's head. "No, Kurogane wasn't useless. Kurogane saved Fai's life, remember?"

"Which he hates me for."

Mokona offered a wobbly smile. "Fai doesn't hate Kurogane. He's just scared?"

Kurogane raised an eyebrow. "Scared?"

"He's scared of how close you guys are."

Kurogane was silent for a couple seconds, then grumbled under his breath, something Mokona couldn't hear, but made him smile anyway.

"Yeah, well, you're still not useless. If it wasn't for you, the kid would be alone."

"No, Syaoran would still have Kurogane, wouldn't he?"

"Hmm. You're the one who still can make them all smile though. I can't do that. And making them smile, right now, isn't useless."

Mokona thought about that a couple seconds. Maybe Kurogane was right.

"Thank you." Mokona said. "Mokona feels better."

"Good."

With nothing else to do, Mokona settled into bed. Mokona still wanted to change things. To help the others. But for now, if all he could do was smile, then that was what he would do.