A/N: I do not own the characters of One Punch Man(well, except for my OC) BTW, English is not my native language, thus, please pardon my mistakes. If any of you would like to help me edit, please tell me and I am ever willing to permit you to do so. (LOL this is actually a copy/paste author's note from my previous short - lived fanfic. RIP old fanfic.)
I name my chapters based on song titles or phrases from songs that inspired me to write certain chapters or scenes. I don't have a proofreader for the time being so the rhythm of my story is just all over the place since I wrote it on a whim. Haha. Ok, I'm gonna stop babbling here and hope you guys enjoy the story
X
You told me you love me, all those beautiful lies...
Ai no Koto Shiranai - Chapter 1
"Love is like a lost object. If you search too hard, you won't find it. But if you forget about it momentarily, it will show up in the most unexpected way…" – Anonymous
One thing can lead to another.
It could be something good to something even better. It could even be an escalating catastrophe.
With the burden of getting her cheer squad into shape fit for the championships that was like 3 months away, minus the fact that newbies with nada basic cheer knowledge dominated this year's batch, 3 months was like 3 weeks. Totally outstanding math skills there.
For Eva, it couldn't get any worse right? Wrong.
As her cheer squad took a ten minute break under her command, and just as she was about to sit down and rethink her decision for filling up the captain position, Yumiko came up to her after taking half an hour too long to piss.
The girl was heaving and wheezing so hard, she sounded like a choking beaver. "Eva…I…" and huffed again. "I…"
"Sorry?" Eva finished off for her. "Well, Yumi – chan, you should just say you need to take a shit the next time you know? Got tube congestion of something? Girl that's nasty." She said, and took a swig from her water bottle.
Yumiko waved a hand to her face while shaking her head violently at the same time. It surprised Eva for a moment. The girl had never looked so troubled before. It was even worse than flunking her math test three years in a row just because she was an airhead and she couldn't give two shits about fixing her problem.
Eva's eyebrows furrowed. "Yumi? Are you OK?"
Yumiko looked at her. "It's not about me, Eva." She said slowly. "It's about you."
Eva slowly put away her bottle to her side and tucked away a strand of her silver hair. It was her habit when she felt agitated or flustered. "I…don't get it. What's going on, Yumi?"
"Y-your boyfriend…" Yumiko stuttered. She was having so much of a hard time trying to say out the rest of the sentence without looking like she was about to cry.
Eva immediately sprung to her feet. "Ryuu – kun? What's wrong with him?"
"I think you should follow me." Yumiko said. "Boys' locker room."
The moment Eva and Yumiko barged into the boys' locker room, watching another girl deep throating her own boyfriend, Eva was lost for moment. No, she didn't lose her mind. She was just lost. Her mind was so vacuumed, silence was louder than her own thoughts.
Well, what was there to think as you watch your guy getting it on with some needy slut who was probably two years younger than you? Man, did that bitch have some serious cleavage for a 16 year old.
Eva laughed. She didn't know why. But she did.
Ryuu was so startled that his own fingers fumbled with his zipper while the other girl was scared shitless and ran to hide in a shower stall. "Eva…babe…I…I can explain, OK? Don't lose your cool yet, Ok?"
She laughed louder. Yumiko was trembling so badly next to her.
"Nah…Ryuunoske, you can swallow back all that shit and spit it out for another stupid bitch OK? I wished I had recorded that little demonstration and replay it every time to remind me that I could've been smarter." She crossed her arms, her smile never leaving her lips.
Ryuu's tall frame hovered over her, trying to put his hands on her shoulder. "Babe, I…"
That was when she snapped.
With only a push, she sent him flying backwards and straight into the lockers, an impact so forceful his body dented and broke the doors. He saw his own blood running down his arm and he looked at Eva, his eyes spelling fear he never would've imagined he would have for her. "E – Eva? What - ? H – How?"
"Now I'm starting to lose my cool." Eva spoke deeply. "Trust me, that wasn't even a quarter of what I have in store for you. I'm sorry if I kept you sexually frustrated all these while you had to get another bitch to suck your dick, but you wanna know why I didn't want to have sex with you yet? It's not me, Ryuu. It's you. You're not ready. You don't know me. You don't know what I'm capable of. I can break you."
The raven haired male said nothing. His jaw was tightly clenched to suppress the beating sensation all over his body from crashing into solid metal.
"It sucks you know," she continued. "It sucks when you have to take certain precautions just because you're not exactly human,"
At that point, her tears starting trickling down the sides of her face.
Her vision narrowed to Ryuu.
Acquiring target analysis:
DETECTED male human
NAME IN DATABASE: RYUUNOSUKE KUROSAWA a.k.a "Bae"
Acquiring target biological response
Initializing scanning process_
_SCAN COMPLETED
Heart and lung action are accelerating.
Target is producing autonomic response.
Target is experiencing fear.
Scanning for physical damage
_SCAN COMPLETED
Mild fractures detected at rib cage and back of skull
'Stop it, Eva'
"It's over," Eva whispered, holding back her sobs. "We're done here, Ryuu."
'I don't want to hurt you.'
Without looking at him for the last time as she said those words, Eva ran out of the locker room and she never stopped running until Yumiko's cries were so distant.
Damn I miss my first love, how we end up this way?
So many broken pieces, wish you were to stay
She didn't know what she was doing.
You told me you love me, all those beautiful lies
She didn't know where she was going.
Who knew the weight of carrying a shattering heart in a mechanical body could be so heavy?
All the tears a shame, you never apologize
An artificial intelligent being isn't supposed to feel, right?
Never apologize
What a shallow understatement.
Her legs carried her so far into the open town until she finally broke down to her knees. She bent over on the sidewalk and cried so hard she was starting to feel queasy, if that was even possible.
Then, a man hollered at her.
"Girl! Get off the streets! Run! A monster is heading this way!"
Before Eva's built in scanner could properly analyse her situation, an upturned car landed right in front her. It was just coincidence she broke down at that very spot. If she would have moved an inch further, she would've have been all broken metal and scraps. The impact alone though wasn't enough to kill her, but her mom would definitely ground her for the rest of her immortality. She can kiss cheer championships and her human social life sayonara.
THUMP! THUMP! THUMP! THUMP!
The ground shook violently causing every vehicle on the road including the one in front of her to bounce and slide in rhythm. Eva wobbled trying to stand up and stabilize herself. A swarm of scared citizens were coming her way knocking her off her feet again as they ran frantically like ants from an insecticide repellent.
A long wailing scream of the siren sent warnings to citizens. This was a Tiger threat level.
Suddenly, a loud, off – key singing of and Iggy Azalea's 'Big Booty' rumbled across the sky like thunder and a gigantic and may I as well add disastrous being thumped its way across the street. Eva didn't exactly know if it really was a monster of some sort or just some unlucky person with terrible steroid abuse and a bad case of failed plastic surgery and silicon injection gone wrong.
The 'thing' was so whacked, you could just spend like a second to laugh your ass off before realizing you should save your ass.
"BIG, BIG BOOTY, WHAT YOU GOT A BIG BOOTY," the monster sang. It momentarily stopped when it got stuck trying to maneuverer its way between two skyscrapers because of its oversized silicon injected butt. Honestly, that thing's ass was so big it looked like an elephant's behind after getting stung by a million bees.
With one violent wiggle, the monster sent those two buildings collapsing to dust and set itself free. "BIG BIG BOOTY, WHAT YOU GOT A BIG BOOTY,"
The monster was edging toward Eva although it didn't necessarily notice her. She would've laugh, but then it occurred to her a fuzzy memory in her brain where Ryuu had once gotten her so wasted at his friend's party she stood on the pool table and started twerking to that song.
She suddenly got so angry when she remembered it and shouted at the monster.
"HEY YOU!" Eva screamed.
The monster stopped and looked over her blown up bust. "HMM?"
"WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU?"
"IT'S BECAUSE I DID TOO MUCH SURGERY TO MYSELF TO ENLARGE MY BUTT SO I BECAME LIKE THIS. I CALL MYSELF QUEEN BIG BOOTY. NOW YOU BETTER RUN BEFORE I CRUSH YOU TO DEATH WITH MY BIG BOOTY" the monster snorted as it laughed.
'Maybe I'm not asking mom for a Kim K bubble butt for my birthday this year'
Feeling the adrenaline rage seeping through every microfiber in her body, Eva crouched over next to the upturned car and lifted it up high above her head, aiming it at the monster.
"THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE TRIED TO ENLARGE YOUR GODDAMN BRAINS INSTEAD BITCH!" she screamed and tossed the vehicle right at the monster. The car crashed right into its face causing the surface to cave in. That's plastic surgery for you.
The monster touched its face only to feel it partially ruined and roared at the top of its lungs. "YOU INSOLENT CREATURE! I WILL SWAT YOU TO DEATH LIKE A PESKY MOSQUITO!"
Eva had to admit she was pretty brave for trying on some moves she had always wanted to hide, but at the same time she had to admit she was pretty stupid for doing that. She could've just ran like all the other citizens.
But no. She just had to be so mad because her fucking ex – boyfriend decided to cheat on her today. That fucking asshole.
She wasn't prepared for the worst and a gigantic hand swooshed and smacked her right off the ground and all the way directly into the open sky to open sky like rocket.
ALERT
BANK TOWER LOCATION
250 METRES
CALCULATING POSSIBLE BODY DAMAGE: 79%
CRASHING TARGET IN 26 SECONDS
YOU ARE SO FUCKED YOU ARE SO FUCKED YOU ARE SO FUCKED
"Shit," Eva muttered beneath her breath as she plummeted horizontally, feeling the pressure of cutting through air in a non – aerodynamic form. It felt like swimming at the bottom of the pool carrying a rock on your back.
CRASHING TARGET IN 10 SECONDS
BODY LOCATION IS DIVERTED
"Huh?"
She was no longer flying backwards.
"Are you alright, Miss? I caught you in time before you could fatally crash into the bank tower. With a 79% damage, I don't think you'll survive. My calculations said so." Said a blonde – haired cyborg who held Eva firmly in his arms.
Eva was dumbfounded as she looked into his eyes of black sclera and burning golden irises. Instinctively, her hand reached out to tuck away her hair obscuring her view. She could tell from his eyes that he was analysing her. Literally. He then diverted his gaze on the monster who continued singing off – key. "I detected all of the monster's weaknesses. Its skin is mainly melamine and it's degradable if I use intense fire." He said as he gently lowered Eva to the pavement. "Please take care of yourself."
"Genos!" a bald young man in a whacky superhero costume suddenly appeared alongside the cyborg. "You want my help?"
"It's OK, sensei. I'll deal with this monster. Besides, you told me to work on moving up my ranks, right?"
The bald man whined disappointedly. "Yeah, whatever. Oh! But let me try this first."
"HEY UGLY!" he shouted at the monster. With the sunlight reflecting off the smooth hairless surface of his head, he really looked like an egg.
That caught the monster's attention. "HUH?"
"YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH THAT BIG FAT BUTT,"
"INCINERATE!" the cyborg shouted and automatically activated a surge of burning fire energy through his body.
"No, no, Genos." The bald hero complained. "You're supposed to say 'wiggle wiggle wiggle'. Follow the song remember?"
"WIG…"
"Uh…never mind, Genos. You're gonna make it sound awkward. Just..just do your job."
"Incinerate!"
The cyborg released a monstrous heat beam from the palm of his hands and it completely engulfed the monster. Wails of agony tore through the still day sky as the monster was cooked from the inside out and slowly shrivelled and burned to dust.
Eva who had been watching the whole scene, only found herself focusing solely on the cyborg. Without realizing it, she accidentally muttered, "He's hot,"
"Well yeah, he just shot out fire from his hands, man." Said a random passer by whom she didn't sense was with her witnessing as the two heroes took on the monster.
Eva didn't bother to glance at the person. "That's not what I meant."