A/N: A really short oneshot I wrote during math class today, while listening to Mutiny Below ( And a tiny bit of Scream Scream Scream ) by Ludo, so I'd recommend listning to that while reading XD. I've got a couple more of this sort of short drabbles in my sleeve (All based on Ludo songs XD) That I'll probably upload as future chapters so... Be prepared? I don't really like uploading this kind of short things but I'm quite happy with this even though I ripped the last line from the song. I just love it to much, it's not like it's a songfic or anything?
Self-edited so corrections are welcome. So are reviews 'cause they make me so incredibly happy.
My heart is screaming, screaming real loud and even though I know how to stop it I can't. He's banging on the door but as soon as I even think about opening it my brain starts telling everything that could go wrong and in how many ways I could get hurt. That he'll leave again soon without a word. That history has the annoying habit of repeating itself.
But he's waiting out there and my heart is only screaming louder and louder and the aching's getting worse. He'll probably give up soon enough if I stay silent and pretend I'm not home. He can't wait out there forever, it's below the freezing point and he's already been out there for more than twenty minutes trying to reach me.
I'm not actually that mad with him if I know my own feelings good enough it's just that I have no idea what i should do if I let him in. He left just like that, without a trace or a sound. One day he was just gone and I didn't hear a word from him until yesterday when he called. I was simply way to mad to actually listen to him at that moment but right now that's the only thing I want to do.
He could probably find someone better for him, our personalities don't match at all and he could do miles better than me but that doesn't change the fact that I want him for myself.
Without realising it I've gotten goosebumps from head to toe, the cold must have been creeping through the isolation even though the heaters on it's highest. Crying is nearly painful when it's cold to this degree. Note to self: avoid crying in the winter.
His banging stopped after a while and I guess it made the screams quiet down even if it didn't feel less painful just because of that. Maybe I could just open the door quickly, just to see if he really left. I mean, if he was still there I'd close the door immidatly, of course. Or I'd tell him to go home. I would definitely not let him in. Never.
He wasn't there. Or so I thought until something yanked the door away, he must've been hiding behind it or I was turning blind. In which case, the door was wide open, with snow blowing in my face and Suzaku right infront of me.
The screaming of my heart had stopped the moment I looked into his eyes and I know this sounds really really silly and cheesy but I couldn't hold on to that small amount of resolution I had left when he hugged me closely.
" I'm sorry I left. "
I've never regretted locking my door more then this, looking into his big sad green eyes.
" But you're here now, can you come in? " I pecked his cheek, smiling softly with my shivering hand on his cheek from the cold, standing barefoot on the porch. " I'm freezing. "