A/N: Hey guys. I wrote my first fic with this pairing titled 'It's You' a few years ago, but I took it down since I wasn't really satisfied with it. I randomly started this story and I'm thinking of continuing depending on positive feedback and wherever I manage to take this. I guess this part is more of a friendship pairing and exploring character depth and history and all that jazz. It's a bit AU since it extended their acquaintance to a full blown friendship and all, but parts of it still pertain to recent happenings in the show (I miss season 1 tho, it was the best). The title is based on a One Republic song. On that note, happy reading! haha
Dreaming Out Loud
Haley tried to remember the type of person she was when she was fifteen. She sifted through her memories and was met with flashes of Geometry books and lame jokes and long days at the River Court followed by late nights at Karen's Café. She bit back longing smiles as low-key babysitting and summers with her guitar and mini golfing and balloon wars on rooftops and basketball-crazed boys flooded her mind. More importantly, she tried to remember who she wanted to be when she was that age.
If someone would've told her when she was a freshman in high school that she'd have a wedding band on her dainty finger before the end of the following year, she would've laughed or scoffed or maybe even cried—not because she was unhappy with the life she ended up having (God, she loved Jamie and wouldn't give the world to change that), but was merely dazed by the possibility of different twists and different turns, and she tried to swallow the guilt entirely. She wasn't an ungrateful person, but she was a thoughtful one and maybe this quality, this blessing (curse) in itself is what bothered her the most; she sees the life she has, but also the one she could've. Had, that is.
Most of all, she remembered him. Jake was soulful and refreshingly earnest and amiable and she knows she talked far too much and far too fast for her own good. Their friendship began as something casual and fitting—they did have guitars, Lucas, and the café in common, at least. But it was more than mutual association that stuck these two together.
Summers during their teenage years found them both with part-time jobs at the café. They used to discuss music, films, and literature and poke fun at Tree Hill High hierarchy. While sharing shifts of taking inventory and refilling drinks, they would compose guitar riffs and cheesy lyrics on lunch breaks and entertainingly observe the various patrons that filtered in and out of the café booths and barstools on a regular basis. She was the first person to know about Nicki (and in time, Jenny). He counseled her on her secret crush on her best friend and she returned the favor when she noticed the rosy color appear in his cheeks when a certain blonde with wild hair and a guarded heart would pass them on streets and school hallways. Jake and Haley were equals; they'd make each other think and laugh and wonder and everything made sense that way. Sure, he was part of the in-crowd and she a quirky bookworm, but neither fact mattered nor neither person cared.
She was the first to spot him at the wedding. He slipped in discreetly, wrapped gift clutched to his chest. He felt a bit (completely) out of place in this world he used to belong in, but a part of him felt like he needed to be here. Hushed voices, furtive glances, and excited chatter passed him right on by, but as the crowds parted, Haley's eyes rested on his warm gaze and his on her amusingly wary disposition. It was if the hectic festivities around them paused, and she had to mask her complete astonishment (pretty hard to do with pensive eyes and a mouth hanging open) and regulate her breathing (seeing him again was like seeing a ghost, and she was completely floored). It was if he was walking into a movie of a life that was no longer his, but he could recognize that foreign yet familiar smile of hers anywhere. His honey brown hair was sleeked back—shorter than in high school and the absence of brown curls filtering into his view allowed her to see him clearer, something that shouldn't have (but did) take her aback just a bit more.
In another life it would've been almost ironic to be standing there, her heels and his dress shoes wobbling slightly and uneasily, creaking on the wooden planks of the chapel's remodeled floorboards. She strode up the white rug rolled down the center walkway, crushing rose petals beneath her feet and he sat on the groom's side, fitting oddly in the first row of hard wooden pews.
They watched with tender eyes as both of their first loves met each other where the aisle ended and the altar began. Peyton, as expected, was a beautiful bride and Haley never once saw Lucas grin that wide before—a smile that bared teeth and reached his eyes, no less (his brooding gaze was seemingly diminished in the church light). If Haley and Jake had been their naïve fifteen-year old selves, they would've pitched fits for sure. If it would've been over the sheer horror and heartbreak of watching as these two unite in holy matrimony or the ridiculous stilettos Haley never would've been able to walk in during her former years, neither was certain (they both think heartbreak wins over heels, but it was a close call).
After the ceremony, there were drinks and tears, and laughter and photographs. Night fell and for awhile, they both pretended no time had passed since the five years she'd seen him last and the almost seven since they'd truly known the details of each other's lives. He doesn't recall asking her to dance, but they somehow ended up here. It was a comfortable stance, his hands and her hips, minus and amid a few heel-clad stumbles.
"Got it, James?" he asked, a chuckle escaping along with this inquiry as she avoided a nasty slip by grasping his shoulder tighter. She smirked, amused by the affectionate old nickname she hadn't heard since high school. She didn't even blink twice; the fact he unconsciously left out the rest of her surname gone unnoticed by her as well as him. He then gave a dramatic pause. "The cheerleaders would be so proud of you," he commented in his solid drawl with mock seriousness and wasn't surprised when he received a swat at his left arm.
"Yeah, well, certain cheer-sluts always made it look easy, now, didn't they?" she gave him a pointed look, but couldn't help her own grin dancing across her lips. She felt like she was a teenager again, lazily dangling her legs off of deserted café countertops, wandering whimsically along the docks, naively resenting the popular girls (two of her future friends) and stepping over her own feet and words, giddiness making every joke between them that more amusing. He continued to laugh with a boyish gleam that charmingly crinkled his eyes and she realized just how much she'd missed that sound and missed his presence.
He paused, and when his gaze shifted back her way there was a seriousness in it that didn't exist just a moment before.
"I bought your new record." This abrupt admittance left her reeling a bit and she was blushing like she was fifteen again and had just played him one of her personal songs. This shouldn't have surprised her but it did and she kept that goofy grin on anyway. "It was great, Hales. It reminded me of how you used to play—raw and genuine and beautiful—something only you could make."
"Oh?" a casual tone trying and failing to mask that she was pleased, to say the least.
Soon enough, they found themselves in need of a break from the festivities. Drifting away from the dance floor, they headed towards a deserted pair of cushioned chairs at a round table in the cornered shadows. After wafting through and surviving the crowds of celebrators in the white silk tents that reception was being held in, she asked how Jenny was (a handful, currently staying with his parents while he flew here for the wedding) and he asked how Jamie was (a delight, currently running around chasing his cousin). She looked beautiful in the moonlight that filtered in from the top of the marquee and the catching up continued. She was a teacher and he was a guidance counselor during the day and took classes at night, both with their guitars at their bedsides in case they ever felt like dipping into a sonata with the past and the dreams and desires they both once had.
It was between the time he told her he was thinking of moving back here and when Haley admitted she and Nathan were separated that she wondered when she and Jake had both gotten so much older than most their age (probably had something to do with she turning wife and he father before either of them were even legal), when they'd grown so far apart from who they used to dream of being (funny how basketball and popularity in a sleepy town carries them all away), and why they never managed to keep in touch, even before he moved away (life plays tricks on ya, doesn't it?).
"It's really good to see you again, Haley," he paused for emphasis. "I mean that." I've missed you, he was saying.
"I know," came her feeble reply, as her nails fidgeted with the white tablecloth. Her head jerked slightly to the side at the cue of Peyton's laughter at something Luke had whispered in her ear and Haley couldn't help but catch the curious smirk from Brooke in the corner of her eye and feel the suspicious stares from Nathan penetrating the back of her neck without even looking.
Aside from his boyish mirth, Jake's eyes retained the smoldering sincerity from before and there wasn't much she could say to measure up to that look, so her gaze instead glued to the candle in the middle of the table. She raised her palm to hover just inches above the flame, teasing and feeling the warmth of the flicker. She felt him stir to remove her hand from its dicey position above the flame, and he didn't let go once her wrist gently hit the table.
Not another word was uttered and the subtle contact in this silence was a curious thing; something told him he was in the right place, and the reason for the feeling that he needed to be here was sitting right across from him, shining uncertainly in the warm orange glow.
A/N: Please let me know what you think! :]