TITLE: Denial
AUTHOR: Obi the Kid (hlnkid@aol.com)
RATING: G
SUMMARY: 5 years Pre-TPM, non-slash. Obi-Wan POV. Obi-Wan lives his nightmare, or does he?
ARCHIVE: Please ask me first.
FEEDBACK: Always appreciated.
MY WEBSITE: http://www.angelfire.com/movies/obithekid/
DISCLAIMER: The characters and venue of Star Wars are copyrighted to Lucas Films Limited. The characters not recognizable from this venue are copyrighted to Tracy C. Knight. The story is the intellectual property of Tracy C. Knight and is copyrighted to her. She makes no profit from the writing or distribution of this story.
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Denial
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I still see your face. You aren't really gone. I did not live this nightmare. Once I wake, everything will be as it once was. The dark figure that struck you down, he was not real. This is all a figment of my imagination. I feel you beside me. You would not leave me to go on alone.
I am not ready for the trials that await. I have much to learn, as you so often tell me. The Force would not choose to take you from me so soon. No. This is a bad dream, that's all it is. A horrible dream. And it seems so real. For so many years we have traveled together and fought together. Are my memories all that remain?
No. It's just a dream.
I see you master. Can you reach out for my hand? I can't lose you now. Hang on to me. Do not let go. The dark figure is near. He's after you master. Trying to take you away from me. All I can see is your face contorted in pain. What has happened master?
Everything is real, I know that now. You no longer stand beside me. I no longer walk in your shadow. Should I strike him down? To do that, I must call on all the anger and rage within my mind and body. Will I touch the dark side? Would I dishonor my training if I did so? Would I dishonor you master?
This cannot be real. I will not accept it. Even as you lay dying in my arms, and you reach up to touch my face, I cannot believe this...this nightmare. How I wish you to be there to stand with me at my Knighting...to cut my braid...to lead me into my future. I see your breath failing. Not much time. I should say goodbye, but I find myself unable to. This is not happening. You are not...these are not your last moments...I will not accept this fate...
The sound of my bedroom door opening alerts me, and the fog begins to clear. I am sure it's Master Windu or Yoda to tell me how sorry they are for my loss. I open my eyes and focus on the tall form standing at my bedside. It reaches down, and places a cool rag on my forehead. My body relaxes at the touch. Cloudy blue eyes look into mine. Words are difficult for me.
"Master?"
The familiar voice is so soothing to my ears. "Yes padawan, I am here."
"Huh? What happened? You are here?"
"Of course Obi-Wan, where else would I be? You have been very sick with a high fever. I've been here the whole time. I just stepped out for a few minutes. Are you okay?"
I nodded. "I...I...dreamt that you...that we...you're alive master." My breathing felt labored.
My master is here. It was a dream. Or is this a dream? What do I believe?
The comforting touch of a hand taking my own, puzzles me. I do not know what to believe, who is real.
"Master?"
"Right here padawan. Can you feel my hand? It's okay. Your dreams have been many. And disturbing I would guess?"
"Yes." This is not real. I saw you die. I held you as you passed into the Force.
"This is not a dream Obi-Wan. You are in your room, in our quarters. I am here. Your fever is just now breaking. All will be well soon. Squeeze my hand Obi-Wan."
Could this be real? My master, here with me? Alive. I do as asked and squeeze the hand that covers my own. "It's good to see you master."
"Obi-Wan, what did you mean when you said I was alive? What did your dreams tell you?"
"You...you died...in my arms. A dark Sith killed you. I watched you fall. I felt your pain, felt you die. It was so real. Are you really here master? Or is this..."
I quiet when he leans forward and presses his temple to mine. The unmistakable touch of his mind washes against my own. He is real. I was dreaming. My master did not die in front of me. He is here with me now, caring for me.
In my weakened state, I have little control, and my emotions get the better of me. Sobs take over as I reality settles in. My master sits beside me, and gently takes me into his lap as I cry. His comforting words are all hear. A soft rocking motion begins. He has not held me like this...like one would a child... for many years. I have never felt so safe. I have never felt so loved.
He whispers to me. "It's alright my son, I am here. Close your eyes. Allow the Force to help you find the peace you seek. I will not leave you."
Was my dream just that, a dream? Or was it a vision of the future? Does it hold the truth? Did I foresee my own future?
Arms around me tighten, and those questions vanish. Whatever the future holds for us, we will face it together. For now, my master is with me, and our journey will continue.
END
AUTHOR: Obi the Kid (hlnkid@aol.com)
RATING: G
SUMMARY: 5 years Pre-TPM, non-slash. Obi-Wan POV. Obi-Wan lives his nightmare, or does he?
ARCHIVE: Please ask me first.
FEEDBACK: Always appreciated.
MY WEBSITE: http://www.angelfire.com/movies/obithekid/
DISCLAIMER: The characters and venue of Star Wars are copyrighted to Lucas Films Limited. The characters not recognizable from this venue are copyrighted to Tracy C. Knight. The story is the intellectual property of Tracy C. Knight and is copyrighted to her. She makes no profit from the writing or distribution of this story.
=======
Denial
=======
I still see your face. You aren't really gone. I did not live this nightmare. Once I wake, everything will be as it once was. The dark figure that struck you down, he was not real. This is all a figment of my imagination. I feel you beside me. You would not leave me to go on alone.
I am not ready for the trials that await. I have much to learn, as you so often tell me. The Force would not choose to take you from me so soon. No. This is a bad dream, that's all it is. A horrible dream. And it seems so real. For so many years we have traveled together and fought together. Are my memories all that remain?
No. It's just a dream.
I see you master. Can you reach out for my hand? I can't lose you now. Hang on to me. Do not let go. The dark figure is near. He's after you master. Trying to take you away from me. All I can see is your face contorted in pain. What has happened master?
Everything is real, I know that now. You no longer stand beside me. I no longer walk in your shadow. Should I strike him down? To do that, I must call on all the anger and rage within my mind and body. Will I touch the dark side? Would I dishonor my training if I did so? Would I dishonor you master?
This cannot be real. I will not accept it. Even as you lay dying in my arms, and you reach up to touch my face, I cannot believe this...this nightmare. How I wish you to be there to stand with me at my Knighting...to cut my braid...to lead me into my future. I see your breath failing. Not much time. I should say goodbye, but I find myself unable to. This is not happening. You are not...these are not your last moments...I will not accept this fate...
The sound of my bedroom door opening alerts me, and the fog begins to clear. I am sure it's Master Windu or Yoda to tell me how sorry they are for my loss. I open my eyes and focus on the tall form standing at my bedside. It reaches down, and places a cool rag on my forehead. My body relaxes at the touch. Cloudy blue eyes look into mine. Words are difficult for me.
"Master?"
The familiar voice is so soothing to my ears. "Yes padawan, I am here."
"Huh? What happened? You are here?"
"Of course Obi-Wan, where else would I be? You have been very sick with a high fever. I've been here the whole time. I just stepped out for a few minutes. Are you okay?"
I nodded. "I...I...dreamt that you...that we...you're alive master." My breathing felt labored.
My master is here. It was a dream. Or is this a dream? What do I believe?
The comforting touch of a hand taking my own, puzzles me. I do not know what to believe, who is real.
"Master?"
"Right here padawan. Can you feel my hand? It's okay. Your dreams have been many. And disturbing I would guess?"
"Yes." This is not real. I saw you die. I held you as you passed into the Force.
"This is not a dream Obi-Wan. You are in your room, in our quarters. I am here. Your fever is just now breaking. All will be well soon. Squeeze my hand Obi-Wan."
Could this be real? My master, here with me? Alive. I do as asked and squeeze the hand that covers my own. "It's good to see you master."
"Obi-Wan, what did you mean when you said I was alive? What did your dreams tell you?"
"You...you died...in my arms. A dark Sith killed you. I watched you fall. I felt your pain, felt you die. It was so real. Are you really here master? Or is this..."
I quiet when he leans forward and presses his temple to mine. The unmistakable touch of his mind washes against my own. He is real. I was dreaming. My master did not die in front of me. He is here with me now, caring for me.
In my weakened state, I have little control, and my emotions get the better of me. Sobs take over as I reality settles in. My master sits beside me, and gently takes me into his lap as I cry. His comforting words are all hear. A soft rocking motion begins. He has not held me like this...like one would a child... for many years. I have never felt so safe. I have never felt so loved.
He whispers to me. "It's alright my son, I am here. Close your eyes. Allow the Force to help you find the peace you seek. I will not leave you."
Was my dream just that, a dream? Or was it a vision of the future? Does it hold the truth? Did I foresee my own future?
Arms around me tighten, and those questions vanish. Whatever the future holds for us, we will face it together. For now, my master is with me, and our journey will continue.
END