A/N: Alas, Season Five is now in the books. It has been a wonderful year, and we now have a beautiful baby girl. This is just a little post-525 oneshot I thought of, since I think Angell's death affected Danny and Lindsay in more ways than one. Please note that this story takes place as if the bar scene in the finale did not occur. For this story, Lucy is two weeks old. Reviews are appreciated and love :) enjoy!
Please note that there is one swear word.
All mistakes are mine.
A/N 2: Lucy's nickname will be explained at the end AN.
Life. Love. Hope. Future.
A full moon hung low over the inhabitants and landscape of New York City, sections of the eerily beautiful light broken by a few clouds in the velvety night sky. With the exception of people laying on their horns now and then, the streets were unusually quiet. Slumber had consumed most of the residents, but no matter how valiant its efforts, the mysterious element of life could not always steal up on an unsuspecting soul.
Danny's sparkling blue eyes remained motionless in their sockets as he stared blankly up at the bedroom ceiling, right arm draped over the shoulders of Lindsay, who lay curled at his side. Sleep had claimed her shortly after they had climbed into bed, the harrowing events of the day still fresh in their minds. Angell, a brave and tough cop who took no bullshit from any suspect, had fallen in the line of duty. The NYPD team had lost one of their own.
He blinked to moisten his eyeballs and could feel the sensation of oncoming tears. Struggling to hold them back, he pulled his wife in closer to his body, allowing her to settle before tightening his grip on her. Although he and Angell had never been close, he still found it difficult to accept the cold, hard truth: she was gone. She was part of the team, and when one falls, everyone follows. The others were still reeling from the sudden and tragic death, but no one was as heartbroken as Flack.
He had always admired the slightly older man. Flack had always been physically and mentally strong, refusing to let suspects just walk away Scot free. But today Danny had seen him in a different state. When he had walked up to him in the hospital moments after Angell's passing, he did not see the Flack he had known for many a year. Grey clouds darkened his normally bright eyes, and his body was hunched over in the chair. Rivulets stained his cheeks, his spirit broken.
Danny knew all too well what it was like to lose a loved one. He could not imagine the emotions Flack was currently struggling with. To love someone with your entire heart and soul and lose them so suddenly was something no human being should have to experience. He swallowed the lump that had suddenly grown in his throat. Although he didn't want to think such thoughts, the day's events would not leave his brain, and the possibility of losing his wife or daughter came to the forefront of his mind.
Very slowly he extracted Lindsay from his arms, instantly missing the sensation of her skin on his. He softly padded over to the opposite side of the bed, stopping midway when Lindsay shifted in her sleep. Not wanting to wake her, he froze in his steps. The young woman groaned but remained slumbering. Smiling to himself, Danny reached the stroller where Lucy was resting. It was a sturdy object, heavily padded and well-protected from the elements, and a creamy-coloured blanket covered the inside. Leaning over, he smiled down on the small infant, her tiny chest rising and falling with each breath. For the first few weeks she would share their bedroom, and when Danny was unable to drift off or had to get up early for work, he would often study his girls for a few minutes. He loved watching them sleep, as they both looked at peace. The scene always gave him an indescribable feeling, but one thing he knew for certain: whenever he saw his wife and daughter – be it day or night – his heart swelled with pride.
He reached down and gently picked up the child, holding her close to him. Lucy's arm twitched slightly at the sudden contact, and she instinctively snuggled into his chest. His powerful but gentle arms supporting her fragile body, he walked over to the window and sat down in a large rocking chair. He slowly rocked back and forth, studying Lucy as he so often did. Even though she was only two weeks old, he was amazed by her beauty. Her velvety hair lay flat on her delicate head, tiny eyelids closed over her magnificent blue irises, and her chubby hands grasped everything and anything that came into contact with them.
"My little Lu-Moo," he whispered softly as to not wake her or Lindsay. "I love you so much. I'll always love you an' your mommy. You two are my world, an' I can't imagine it without you." He paused to gently rub her cheek with the side of his finger and smiled as he recalled a distant memory. "Y'know, when your mommy first told me she was pregnant, I was scared. Frightened that I wasn't good enough for her an' that I'd let you both down. I didn't know if I would be a good father. But as the months went by, I realized that maybe I was meant to be a parent. Your mom an' I would sit for hours discussin' what t'name you, what colours to paint your room, how we'd raise you…" He sighed and leaned his head back on the chair. "Before she came along, I never thought about havin' a family. Your Godfather, though, he knew. He knew I'd find someone as great as your mom. He knew I'd fall in love, an' I'm willin' to bet a Benjamin that he even knew I'd have a family one day."
Moonlight filtered in through the window, pooling on Lucy's cheeks. The light almost seemed to sparkle as it danced across her skin. In his arms slept half of his very flesh. He moved his finger and suddenly found it encased by a tiny hand. Bending his head, he placed a feather-light kiss on the child's forehead. "I never want to lose you, Moo."
Tilting his head back again, Danny closed his eyes and savoured the peaceful feeling of holding his daughter. After what seemed like a few minutes, a pair of arms wrapped themselves around his neck. Danny's lids shot open, and he instantly shivered from the contact. "What are you doin' up?"
Lindsay kissed her husband's temple before doing the same to Lucy. "I heard everything."
"Did I wake you?"
She ignored his question and ran her fingers – which were still slightly chubby from the pregnancy – through his bed-ridden hair. "You called her Moo again. Poor thing will be confused when she's older as to what her real name is."
Danny smiled. The nickname was something he had thought of not long after Lucy had been born, merely out of fun. He often called her by her given name, but every now and then he found himself saying "Moo." It held a double-meaning, as the word had appeared in the card Lindsay left for Danny when she first went to Montana, back when they were still sorting out their feelings. Although Lindsay often commented on him using the nickname, she secretly adored it and had even been caught using it by Danny once or twice.
The new parents gazed down at their sleeping daughter, who was still curled inward to Danny's chest. His heartbeat echoed in her ears, and the familiar sound lulled her into an even deeper sleep. Lindsay gently rubbed the infant's soft scalp, her other hand enveloped by Danny's larger mitt. "I'm here if you want to talk about it."
Danny kept his eyes on Lucy. "What if it had been you in there, Linds? What if you had been with Angell an' gotten shot?"
The young woman offered her husband a comforting smile. "You can't think like that, Danny. I wasn't in there, I'm alright. There's nothing to worry about."
"Maybe not today, but what about the future? What if we wake up one mornin', an' it's the last day we'll ever see each other? Flack will never get t'see Angell again. I can't bear to be without you or Lucy."
Lindsay understood his distress. Releasing her hold on his hand, she cupped it around his cheek, gently urging him to turn his head so they were eye-to-eye. "No one knows what the future holds. That's why you have to cherish each day and not take anything for granted. Unfortunately in this job, sometimes lives are cut short. That's the risk we take."
Danny leaned in so their foreheads were touching. "If anythin' ever happened to you, I don't know what I'd do. I'd be completely an' utterly lost."
Lindsay summed it up in five simple words. "You would raise our daughter."
He captured her lips, oceanic eyes twinkling in the moonlight. After they broke apart, he bumped noses with her. "I love you."
"I love you too."
Lucy's sudden movements interrupted their private moment, and they turned their attention to the infant. She was not awake but was squirming around in her father's arms. Danny and Lindsay coaxed her gently with a combination of cheek rubs and soothing words. The child eventually became relaxed and was transferred from one parent to the other. Standing up, Danny wrapped his arms around his wife's waist, resting his chin on her shoulder as he gazed down proudly at the sleeping newborn. Lindsay hummed a tune as she gently swayed from side to side, continuing to calm her daughter with her familiar voice, something Lucy had heard every day for the past nine months. "Why is she so cute?"
Danny nuzzled into her neck. "She gets it from you."
The two fell silent then, content in holding their child. They were amazed that a small being could bring them such happiness. Lucy was unable to do anything, but she had managed to capture their hearts even before they met her. She was a mere two weeks old, yet had already influenced two people in her life. It was her blessing that had helped Danny and Lindsay reunite and rekindle the flame that had nearly been extinguished some time ago. A child can have much power over adults, even if they themselves are not aware of it.
Cuddling into her mother's chest, Lucy sighed peacefully as the comforting sound of Lindsay's heartbeat reached her ears. Danny kissed his wife's cheek before removing one arm from across her waist. Padding over to the bed, the two carefully placed their daughter back in the stroller, Danny supporting her head whilst Lindsay held her body. Lucy remained asleep the entire time, completely undisturbed. His other arm still snaked around Lindsay's back, Danny bent down and kissed Lucy's tiny nose. "G'night Moo."
Lindsay did the same, and once the child was settled in, they climbed back into bed and faced each other while tangled in a protective and loving embrace. They stared into the other's eyes for a while, trying to search for any clues as to what they were thinking. Danny's hand ran up and down Lindsay's back, while her fingers created lazy circles on his chest and toned stomach. His scent assaulted her nostrils, a mixture of cologne, shampoo, and home.
"I want to protect her," Danny whispered in the darkness. "I don't want t'let her go; I'm afraid somethin' will happen t'her."
"You know you can't always protect her," Lindsay reassured her worried husband. "You can't always protect me either. Whatever happens, happens. She'll always be your little girl, but one day you're going to have to let her go."
He fell silent for a moment before speaking again. "I'm sorry if I frightened you earlier."
A smile played across Lindsay's lips, and she ran her free hand along the edge of his jawline. "It's normal to think like that after such a tragic event. But please don't think that I'm going anywhere, because I'm not. I plan to be around here for a long time. If there are other plans for me…well, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Right now I'm focused on catching the scum who did this and enjoying life with my husband and daughter."
Taking her left hand in his, Danny kissed her silver wedding ring, embedded with a small diamond in the middle. It was beautiful and simple, just like his Lindsay. In the darkness she could make out a hint of a smile on his handsome features, and he uttered the three words he would never grow tired of saying. "I love you."
"I love you too cowboy."
Nuzzling in to his chest, Lindsay closed her weary eyes and almost immediately drifted off. Danny lightly combed his fingers through her strands, continuing down her arm and drawing circles on her skin, which burst into goosebumps. He often had that effect on her and vice versa. They could make the other's skin come alive with their touch and kisses.
Sleep finally did catch up to Danny. It encased him in a soothing cocoon, promises of peace and security awaiting him. As the last vestige of wakefulness disappeared like a wisp of thin air, Lindsay's words echoed in his mind: "No one knows what the future holds. That's why you have to cherish each day and not take anything for granted."
He met Lindsay at the citadel of dreams, and as husband and wife soared off into the great unknown, hand in-hand, Danny silently vowed to live by those wise words for the rest of his life.
A/N 3: Lucy's nickname was inspired by a three-year-old girl at my daycare whom I love with all my heart. We all call her "Moo."