She was on her death bed. The years of smoking her cigars had finally caught up to her. Sir Integra Fairbrook Wingates Hellsing, the master of two vampires and an entire secret organization operating beneath the queen of England herself, was dying.
Alucard was the only one left in the room after Seras had left after the doctor. The man who worked so hard to keep her moving merely shook his head as a sad goodbye and left the room, leaving the servant to stand by his master's side.
"I've offered it before, you know," Alucard began, taking a few strides toward her. He was without his glasses and hat this time as he knelt beside her and took her hand. "My offer still stands," he said softly as he caressed her wrinkled hand.
Integra chuckled, a laugh which turned into a cough. "I'll die as a human, vampire."
"Huh," Alucard smirked half-heartedly. "You always had that determination with you. Are you certain you don't want to stick around to watch as humanity slowly rots?"
Integra chuckled. "I'll be watching. Maybe not in this body, but I'll be watching."
He fixed his vermillion eyes on her cerulean blues, remembering the first time he had seen them. She was so much younger, then. Truly: where did the time go? "You grew up so fast," he remarked, leaning in and pressing his forehead to her hand. "Why do you have to go, my countess?"
Integra smiled. "My time here is over. It's as simple as that. God's decided to take me in."
Alucard gave her a long look. He could almost see her: he could almost see the woman she once was. If he studied her blue eyes hard enough, he could even almost see that innocent little girl. "Do you remember how you used to sit with me? It was the strangest thing, seeing you in your little pantsuit, coming in to check up on me."
"I wanted to know more about vampires, as I recall. And you were the best source of knowledge. I've grown up quite a bit since then," she smirked.
"Ah, but remember that time passes differently for me. I can still see Lady Hellsing in you."
"Hmph," Sir Integra closed her eyes and listened as the machine slowly beeped next to her. "She must be rather faint by now; after all we've been through."
"I wouldn't say that. There are moments, little moments, I can still see a bit of that child in you, Master."
She reached out with a shaky hand and ran her fingers through his ebony locks.
"It's so strange," the young Integra Hellsing remarked as she ran her hand through his inky hair. She was sitting rather comfortably on his lap, something that had become a habit of her spare time. It was a few weeks after she had first met her vampire, and though she was still a little nervous in his presence, she was certain that she had full control over him.
The vampire smiled and turned his head. "What is?"
She continued touching his hair gently. "Nothing about you is real, is it? It's all some sort of illusion. Your physical body… is it just for show?"
He chuckled and lifted his leg so that he was cradling her. She was sitting sideways on his lap, staring at him through those curious eyes of her. "It's an enigma, isn't it?" he smirked. "No, this is my form. The mist or bats I can turn into- those are just my powers."
"Do you feel pain?" she asked.
"Of course. I simply have… a rather high tolerance towards it."
She gasped. "So every time you're shot, it hurts?"
"With normal guns, no. I thought you were speaking of blessed silver. I'm not alive, Master." She flinched when he said that. She leaned her head over to his chest. He arched an eyebrow. "What are you doing?"
"If you don't have a heartbeat, how are you moving?"
He slowly wrapped an arm around her and placed his hand against her head, combing it through a few strands of her platinum mane. She closed her eyes and listened closely. "There's humming," she whispered. He chuckled at her discovery, and she could hear his voice vibrating through his chest.
"That's the strange thing about Vampirism. Even without a heartbeat, the blood flows. There's some sort of dark energy causing it to do that. It actually moves much faster than human blood, which is why we heal faster, move faster, and can bear more weight." It's also why we spurt so much blood when a limb is chopped off, he thought darkly, enjoying his memories.
She didn't move from the spot for a while, her eyes shut. After a few minutes, he looked down and found that she was asleep. It was late in the night, and she was up past her bedtime just to talk to him. He smiled to himself. Alucard, though he would never admit it, enjoyed their talks, and when she visited him. Integra was such an interesting girl.
He let her rest on his chest for a few hours, mindlessly stroking her hair, letting his thoughts wander. Walter would come in soon. But for the moment, he could enjoy the feeling of her warm body pressed up against him.
Alucard eyed her neck. It would be so easy to just lean down for just a moment and claim every drop of blood within her body. The seals had already withered away when Abraham had died. He continued following the Hellsing family because he found so much potential within them. It was the reason he followed Integra: she had the potential for greatness. But for now, he let her rest on him, her innocent face pressed up against his dead heart, perhaps giving it the only warmth he had received in centuries. She had the most delicious blood he had tasted in his life. But it wasn't blood he wanted at the moment. No, even though it was night, the time any true nosferatu should be awake, he wanted nothing more than to simply fall asleep.
Alucard closed his eyes, remembering back then.
"Your hair is so interesting," Integra complimented- or at least, he assumed that was a compliment. "It's the queerest style. And yet, it's surprisingly… soft."
"Soft?" Alucard questioned, amusement flickering in his eyes.
Integra smiled, "Perhaps the only soft thing about you."
Alucard chuckled and closed his eyes once again, enjoying the feeling of her hand running through her hair. "You're on your deathbed, and yet you're mad enough to comment on the texture of my hair."
"I've often found my mind wandering to strange places lately. And maybe the hair isn't the only thing."
Alucard opened one eye. "Oh? And what else would be soft about me, pray tell?"
"Your heart."
He let out a rather loud laugh, clutching his sides. "Oh, that's perfect, Master! The most infamous vampire alive has a softened heart! BAHAHA!"
Integra's gaze never wavered. She withdrew her hand. "Perhaps not all of it. But it's there."
He rolled his eyes. "I'm merely the obedient servant, Master."
She arched an eyebrow. "I think there's a little bit of man still left in you. You cried when the Paladin died."
His laughter quieted and his features stiffened. "That was… that was the last time I will ever do that. I'm a certifiable monster, just ask Walter. Oh wait!" his frown deepened.
Integra rolled her eyes. "You'll keep living. But that little sliver won't go away, Alucard. You can try and repress him all you want; he's still there, just as my childhood stays with me. You can't rid yourself of your past."
Alucard heaved a heavy sigh. This was one of those times it wouldn't hurt to just let her win.
She was fifteen now, and had decided that as his master, she should be able to beat him somehow. Whether it be through wits or physical activities, she wanted to have something over him. Alucard had no idea where this streak of competitiveness came from, but he absolutely loved it.
"Your move, vampire," the girl said.
Apparently, she had given up on beating him in any physical exercise, and had resorted to playing poker with him.
"You want to play strip-poker?" he questioned. That earned him three silver bullets lodged within his skull. But it had been worth it.
"I'll raise," he challenged her, placing a pile of his blue chips forward on the table.
Integra kept her face blank as she went over her cards again. Little did she know, Alucard was actually cheating. With his incredible eyesight, he could see the reflection of her cards in her eyes. He felt a little guilty about it, but he wouldn't let her win against him.
She called it. Walter placed another card down on the table, sending the vampire a glare. It seemed the old retainer knew precisely what he was doing, but chose not to interfere. Alucard grinned. She didn't even have a complete flush yet, while his ace-high straight was already dominating the game.
Integra smirked and as she was calling his raise, she raised it even higher. He mirrored her actions. "All in," Alucard said. If he ever wanted to go back to drinking his wine on his throne, he would have to end it.
Integra pushed all her chips in the middle of the board confidently. "Flip them," she demanded, and he all too happily obliged.
The girl frowned at his cards, but showed him hers. He chuckled. "Silly girl: you can't-"
His words were stuffed back into his mouth so forcefully; he damn near choked on them. Walter had placed the final card down.
Integra burst into a fit of cocky laughter, scooping all of his cards into her pile. "Maybe next time you challenge your master, you would do well to remember this day."
And with that, she walked away from the table, leaving Alucard to stew in his own anger.
He turned his murderous gaze towards Walter, who shrugged it off as if he were not a dangerous vampire. "Walter," he said through gritted teeth, "You let her win that one, didn't you?"
He shrugged.
Alucard sighed. "You know, she'll develop an unhealthy ego."
"She needs to know that you can be beaten, Alucard. This is simply the cleanest example. And having a healthy ego is good for her; though I doubt winning a simple game is going to inflate it that much. She needs to be proud of her heritage."
"She'll be beaten eventually," he warned.
Walter smiled. "She will face her struggles. Poker, I think, is the best way for her to learn how to cope with winning and losing, as well as the gambling that goes along the way."
Alucard shrugged and meandered off toward the wall. Before he phased away, however, he tossed a careless glance over his shoulder.
"Just make sure she doesn't get addicted to gambling."
"Cigars," he growled, staring at the cursed box on her dresser.
Integra leaned back in her pillow. "What about them?"
"They're the damned things that are shortening your life!" he shouted, clenching his hands. "You got addicted to the damn things, and now your lungs are giving out!"
She made an amused grunt. "You know, if I weren't lying here, I would probably be shuffling through my paperwork, smoking another one of those things."
Alucard gave her an infuriated glare. "Does it look like now is the time to do this to me?"
Integra smiled. "Everyone has something. You have your impaling, which by the way, led you to an even earlier death than me."
He grunted. "Fine. I have impaling, you have smoking, Walter had… being a deceiving twat, but what about the Police Girl? As far as I can tell, she does her duties without a hitch."
Integra smirked. "Oh, I think not. It was a little secret we were supposed to keep from you, but… she's been having quite the jolly time with her Frenchman."
"Pip? She still keeps him around?" his anger had dissipated slightly.
She nodded. "I once caught them dancing together. It was odd. But… they did look rather… happy."
Alucard smiled as a sudden memory came to his mind. "Remember when I taught you how to dance?"
Walter was out of the question, and she had procrastinated hiring a tutor for too long. Integra, at the age of eighteen, shuddered as she slowly marched her way down to her servant's lair. She really didn't want to do this.
She contemplated knocking. When have I ever knocked? She wondered to herself. I am the master of this house. I knock for no one. But if I knock, and he doesn't answer, doesn't that mean I won't have to do this?
No, dammit, I have no choice. She mentally scolded herself. Why the hell would he not answer, anyways? He does nothing but sit in there and drink his blood. Integra took a deep breath. She wished it wouldn't be so awkward to dance with Walter, and the retainer knew nothing of dancing. He had actually been the one to suggest Alucard. But the bloodthirsty vampire would undoubtedly tease her about it to no end. Her cheeks burned with scarlet.
Finally, mustering up her courage, she swung open the door.
And there he was, patient as always, swishing his glass. But there was something in her eyes that told her he knew precisely what had transpired in her mind only a few moments ago.
"Something bothering you, Master?" he smirked.
Integra balled her fists. "Alucard, I command you to teach me how to dance."
He chuckled at this and rose from his seat, slipping off his glasses and placing his hat atop his throne. "Dancing? What an odd request. Dancing is little more than unnecessary, recreational theatrics. What is the occasion?"
Integra sighed. "One of the members of the Convention's sons is having a wedding. I was advised to dance, so as to seem cultured."
Alucard chuckled. "And I suppose you procrastinated, and are now asking me as a result, as you didn't schedule quickly enough to gain a tutor."
Silence said everything he needed to know. With a flourish, he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and whisked them both away to the ballroom.
Integra gasped as she traveled through his shadows. There was darkness and thousands of red eyes peering at her, as well as amorphous blobs of seemingly alive people. She was alone for a split second, losing Alucard in the mist that he had become, before she wound up where she would have gladly walked. He formed beside her.
"You are to never do that again, SERVANT!" Integra shrieked, clutching her sides to keep the shivers away. It was the one time since the day they had met that she actually felt afraid. He arched an eyebrow but shrugged.
"Very well, I'll let you walk from now on."
Integra sighed in a mixture of both relief and irritation. Music began to fill the room. It was a slow song that she remembered. She tilted her head. "You chose this song?"
Alucard gave her his best smile. She noticed that his attire had changed, as he had changed into a midnight black suit. He did look rather dashing, and it was a breath of fresh air from his normal red duster. He looked… younger, somehow.
He stepped up to her and offered his hand. "I felt it had a nice rhythm," he explained. She hesitated for a moment, giving him a look of distrust. He seemed almost hurt by the expression. "I'm not going to bite, Master," he teased.
She sighed and placed her hand in his. When was the last time she had touched him? Four years ago?
Integra wriggled a bit as he placed a hand on her hip. He paused. "When dancing," he began in a serious tone, "You need to touch your partner. Otherwise it would look rather awkward, wouldn't it?" She said nothing but complied, allowing his hand to stay.
She had seen a few people dancing before, and knew as a rule she had to put a hand on his shoulder. It was funny, how high her arm had to be raised, to actually manage to get her hand there. Alucard was rather tall. (*Song: Always and Forever- could be by any artist*)
"Always and forever,
Each moment with you
Feels just like a dream to me
That somehow came true.
And I know tomorrow
Will still be the same
Because we've got a life of love
That won't ever change and
Every day, love me your own special way,
Melt all my heart away
With a smile…"
Integra blushed as he brought her a bit closer. Her chest was just inches away from his, and she was practically on his feet. He had moved her hand by then, so that both her arms were around his shoulders and both his hands were on her hips. She tried not to look up into his eyes.
"Are you all right, Integra?" he asked, looking down to her. She looked up and pressed her lips together.
"Yes, I just… I've never danced before, much less been this close to someone."
His eyes widened. Of course she hadn't! She hadn't even had enough time for any of the boys her age, as she was too busy running the organization. She hadn't even had her first kiss yet…
That thought was rather… comforting.
He leaned down a little bit with a soft smile on his face. "Another tip: it's good to look your partner in the eyes the entire time, or else you might offend him."
Integra looked up and was a bit shocked to find his face so close to hers. He began to lean forward. She didn't push him away. They had stopped moving, and so did time and space.
When his lips met hers, an electric spark seemed to run all through her body. He was gentle as he just softly brushed his lips with hers, giving her the gentleman's kiss. Her heartbeat quickened as she enjoyed this feeling for the first time.
And then she realized something.
His lips were cold. Everything about him was chilled. She wasn't dancing with a man. She remembered what happened the first time they met, and she realized that the same mouth that was locked with hers had been around the corpses of her uncle's men, as well as countless other souls. His sharp fangs were just beyond his lips.
It wasn't right. It wasn't right to feel that way. Integra pulled away slowly and pulled her hands back. She looked down at the ground, ashamed of what she had done. She tried to force what she felt back down into her chest.
"I can't…" she backed away slowly, still looking down. "I-I just…" she turned and fled the room, not bearing to look at the expression on Alucard's face.
Alucard looked on in silence. His face had fallen. He had dealt with quite a bit of disappointment in his life- this shouldn't have been anything. He wasn't surprised. He was a monster.
He stared at the door and where she had retreated from him, tears running down her face. The song let out one more line before flicking off.
"And we'll share tomorrow… together."
Integra chuckled. "Yes, I remember the day. I dealt with a week of depression before you made that one up to me. I was so naïve back then- so confused. You had me so twisted in the head I didn't know what to think."
Alucard laughed. "Hormonal boys will do that to you. It was one of those times I'm glad Walter was there to set us both straight." And then he thought of something. "How did you do at the wedding? I don't believe I ever asked about that."
Integra smirked. "What do you think? I'm a fast learner. Unfortunately, most of my dance partners consisted of old men."
"And what about your other partners?"
"A little boy who didn't have any other options. I think it was the groom's brother."
He smiled again. "No one was ever good enough for you, were they?"
"Damn right."
The mood suddenly became a bit more serious. "Are you worried about what Sir Penwood will do in the future?"
Integra looked thoughtful. "If I worried about everything that could go wrong in the future, I will never be able to die peacefully. Living in the here and now… it's made me oddly calm. I know Seras will handle herself well."
"And what of me?"
She scrutinized him for a while. "You were already free by the time Abraham died, and yet you chose to stick around to serve under humans. I'm under the impression you've grown tired of being a king or a count."
"I've also grown tired of being a servant and a master," he countered.
"So what will you do?"
He shrugged. "I suppose I could travel a bit. Maybe I'll stick around to see how Penwood handles things, though I doubt that man would ever make half the master you are."
She smiled. "Good to know. That sets my nerves at ease." He moved over to sit on her bed, still holding her hand. "Why did you stick around?"
He shrugged. "Perhaps I… actually did enjoy it. I saw potential in the Hellsing family. There were many times I was tempted to act against the seals, but I realized that would take away the fun. I wonder what the future will bring; hopefully a human competent enough to defeat me. I've grown rather bored with life."
Integra grunted. "We're both such old geezers."
It was when Alucard was away in Brazil. She was twenty two by this time, and knew what the hell she was doing with her organization. What she had not anticipated, however, was her servant slaughtering the innocent soldiers merely sent in to do their jobs.
The phone rang. "It's your servant, Integra," said the voice on the other line. Her eyes widened.
"What did you do to the SWAT team they sent in?" she questioned.
"I killed them," Alucard said without hesitation. "I wiped them out. There's not one of them left. Now give me the order, Sir Integra. The police department's under their control, aren't they? This siege, they're simply carrying out their orders. These people I'm about to kill might be ordinary humans… but I can kill them. I'm ready to strike them down without hesitation or the slightest regret. Why? Because I'm a monster, that's why. What about you, Integra? My gun is pointed, my sights are trained, my magazine is fully loaded. I've pulled the slide and removed the safety. But… you have to pull the trigger. So what are you going to do? I'm waiting for my order, Director of Hellsing. Integra Fairbrook Wingates Hellsing."
Integra leaned back in her chair and glared at the phone. She silently pulled her drawer open and took a cigar out, placing it between her lips. The lighter soon followed, flame igniting the end. She took a slow drag. Walter watched from the shadows of the office, waiting with bated breath for her orders.
The ashes of the end fell to the ground.
In the blink of an eye, Integra slammed her hand down on the table and burst from her chair, her face contorted in rage.
"Don't underestimate me, foot soldier! I gave you my order! Nothing's changed! Search and destroy! Search and destroy! Any force that stands in your way is to be squashed! Don't run and hide! We walk through the front door and blow them away! Crush all opposition! Reduce them to smithereens!"
Laughter came from the other end of the line. "Roger. Yes, that's the final fig leaf. This is wonderful indeed. You're giving me a hard-on, Integra. In that case, I'll come out swinging. Watch carefully, Sir Hellsing." The line ended.
There was a long silence in her office. She knew fully well the effects of her command.
She kept staring ahead, contemplating her actions. "Walter, do you think I made the right decision?"
The old retainer smiled. "It's not my place to say whether it's right or wrong. I'm merely the butler. I'm here to serve you, my lordship. Now," he bowed, "Shall I make us some tea? We do have some fine quality Ceylon leaves."
Integra heaved a sigh.
It was then that she realized just how much of a monster her servant truly was… and what a monster she was becoming.
No. She was not a monster. She was not a monster.
She was just strong, as all. She was willing to crush whoever it took to reach her goals, even if they were just humans.
She was not a monster.
"Do you mean to tell me you've grown bored with killing?"
Alucard laughed sinisterly. "Not on your life. I will enjoy that thrill until the end of my days. But mindlessly killing… the act of letting your demons go and simply doing it without cause… I will never do that. There will always be a reason, however small. That makes all the difference between me and the vampires I hunt."
The machine got a bit slower.
Alucard leaned in and slid his hand down her wrist, keeping his finger there for a pulse. Integra coughed a bit, and the machine went back to normal. Alucard sighed in relief.
"I don't have much time left, you know," she said nonchalantly.
"I know," he dipped his head.
She pressed her lips together. "There's one last thing I want to give you before I pass on."
He perked up a bit.
Integra rolled up her sleeve, exposing her tanned, wrinkled skin to the air. Her body had gotten a bit colder. "Memories," she said quietly as she brought her finger to her teeth, biting hard enough to draw blood.
"Master!" Alucard's jaw dropped. "You can't risk any more of your life! Stay as long as possible, it's not worth it!"
Integra moved her hand before him. "It is, Alucard. Obey your master as long as she is still among the living."
He frowned. "Just what does this mean?" It means she's close, a voice in the back of his mind nagged.
She didn't respond, and he sighed as he gently brought her finger to his mouth, where he licked the blood from her wound. He was so incredibly tempted to turn her there just so that he wouldn't deal with what came afterwards. But he didn't. He followed his master until the very end.
The coppery liquid whet his tongue and he resisted the urge to moan in ecstasy. Her blood had aged like a fine wine, as she had remained a pure, unadulterated virgin all these years. It was one of the things he respected about her: she was quite possibly the oldest living virgin he had ever met. She resisted the temptation for her entire life. It was incredibly admirable, another trait about her that he admired.
His mind clouded over as he focused on what she so desperately wanted to show him.
She was thirteen. He recognized that it was yet another one of those times that she would sit on his lap before she eventually grew out of it. This time, she was wearing his red hat.
"You're not like most of the other vampires, are you?" she asked him as she maneuvered the brim to see him better. He chuckled and tugged it down again. She made a noise of discontent.
"Well, I most certainly am the most powerful, so naturally I'd be different."
She turned it sideways. "No, I mean- you're… I guess I could say you're more human."
He tilted his head. "More human? Didn't you see the way I was with Richard's hooligans?"
Integra shivered. "Yes, I know you're a monster too. But you also have somewhat of a conscious, however muddled you're trying to force it to be. If you were like the other monsters, you would have killed me by now."
"I'm living beneath your family's seals. I would most likely have killed you by now if I wasn't."
Integra rolled her eyes. "I don't believe you. The seals stopped working years ago- Walter told me. So why would you serve me if you could easily kill me?"
He had smirked. "Perhaps I see something in you. I'm not certain. I've lived longer than other vampires- perhaps that's why I'm so different."
Integra frowned. "Even if that's true, you're different. Hey, Alucard?"
"Hmm?"
"If I wasn't a Hellsing, and you had spared my life anyway, would… would we be friends?"
Alucard remembered what had gone through his mind at that point- his thought consisted of 'what an odd notion' and 'is this child slow in the head?'
He saw himself shrug. "I suppose… if things were so drastically different… in some miniscule way… yes. I suppose I might decide to make you an acquaintance of mine."
The memory changed.
It was when Integra was much older, around the age of twenty-one, before Millennium was even in the picture. He could see himself in the background, watching his master go toe to toe against Walter in a fencing match. And, by some miracle, she managed to best him. Walter, the Angel of Death, had lost a fencing match. He was appalled.
"Incredible dexterity, Master," he complimented as she took off her helmet. She sent him a smirk. Ah, he could remember that face of hers like it was yesterday: her skin was smooth, her blue eyes piercing and yet so youthful. Before Millennium was ever in the picture, on some small scale, Integra was never introduced to so much bloodshed. It seemed to make her a better leader in the future, but it also took away that last sliver of innocence within her eyes. How he missed that little glint.
She grinned. "Thank you, Alucard. Perhaps you would try your hand in besting me?"
He saw himself laugh, something he would have done even in the future. "I would, but as I am not a human and far quicker and stronger, I would not only run the risk of besting you, but impaling you upon those weak swords as well."
Integra snorted. "Fine, then. But I am not done winning for the day. Perhaps a game of wits, then?"
He saw himself smirk. "Chess it is."
The memory moved forward to the ending of the game. It had been long and taxing, but in the end, Alucard had won. Integra frowned at the board. His experience was simply better than hers. "Worry not, Master," he said as he put the pieces away and she took a few puffs of her cigar. "I know that one day; you will manage to conquer the board. And rather than me being a lone king, I shall be your knight."
The memory changed.
It was after his return from Millennium, when Integra was already withered a bit by age. She had only just opened a wound for him and dropped blood to his mouth. He had gone without sustenance for thirty years.
"You're home, Count," she said.
"Back forevermore, my Countess," Alucard said as the drop fell unto his tongue.
Integra arched an eyebrow. "Oh, so now I'm a countess?"
He gave her a smile. "You've conquered. I respect you for that. You've become my equal." She lowered her hand and he licked at her wound until it was healed. The comment he made afterward made her freeze. "You've finally grown."
Just as he had done in the memory, Alucard licked her wound closed. Integra lowered it back to her side. The machine once again had begun to decrease its rate of beeping. The pulse beneath Alucard's fingers had begun to drop as well.
"Alucard," Integra rasped. He leaned forward. She gently brought a hand to his head and leaned him over so that he was resting on her chest, much as she had done to him in her childhood. He could hear her slowing heart beating beneath her chest.
He stayed still, not wanting to move a muscle, not wanting to miss out on any last fleeting second of the warmth she offered. "I love you," she whispered quietly.
The machine grew flat.
Well everyone, how was that? For my first one-shot, hopefully it wasn't too bad. I wanted to make them a relationship, but a more realistic one. The whole kissing scene really had me, because as the author I wanted so badly to make them both go "Screw it!" and fall in love, but that's not a very realistic Hellsing story, is it? Anyways, please review! I hope you enjoyed it!