Disclaimer: Ansatsu Kyoushitsu / Assassination Classroom is property of Matsui Yuusei.
What would you say?
"If at any time you had confessed your feelings to Nagisa... What would you say afterwards?"
"... What?"
"It's Nagisa. He doesn't believe that someone could like him. So, if he asked you why you like him, what would you say?
"..."
Kayano left the spoon on the table as she sighed heavily and looked at her phone, waiting for Nakamura to send another message throughout the night.
The silence of the kitchen was broken only by her slow breathing, the empty plate was lying on the table in front of her and it should be washed, but it seemed that this wasn't in the girl's plans for the moment. Brushing a lock of her green hair and dropping it behind her ear, she looked at her dinner with attention and then at the container of the dessert that she had eaten.
It was quite late and she should study. Or at least contentrate on anything else but Nagisa, but that conversation with her friend prevented her from doing so.
"If Nagisa asked me why I like him, what would I say?" She asked herself as she leaned her elbows on the table.
Tha answer was easy.
Nagisa was the only one able to break her actress facade, the only one able to see through that false wall that she had built along with the tentacles. And not only that. He collapsed it. He defeated it. He removed it with a simple and unexpected move, saving her from herself and what that mask that she had decided to wear had caused. Nagisa managed to destroy the pain that the tentacles inflicted upon her in silence, he beat the perfect and the alleged killer that she had become and helped her to understand that she shouldn't carry the burden of her pain alone.
Anyone who had been in her situation would have fallen in love with Nagisa in the same way, right?
After all, she had come to the E class being broken, broken and lost. Being a mere ghost of what she had once been, seeking revenge for her sister's death, even if it meant having to endure the torment and suffering of the tentacles for almost over a year. She had lost all hope, she felt empty, she was nothing more than a machine driven by rancor. And even because of that resentment she risked her life and her companion's
And yet it was precisely Korosensei and Nagisa who saved her from it. Who managed to rip off the mask. Precisely them. They taught her how to accept the death of her sister properly, that she wasn't alone, there were many people around who wanted to help her and she shouldn't be a lone assasin, not there, not in E class.
It was very likely that it was that kindness, the way in that he treated her, which made her head spin and her pulse quicken. Because the memory of that kiss would never leave her mind.
She focused on looking at a single point of the table for a moment, she felt her cheeks heat up and her heart was pounding. She always did the same when she thought of him, she couldn't help it.
Because Nagisa was all she wanted to be. Everything she admired.
Because at first glance, he looked like a frail boy (most of the time even a girl), but it was quite the opposite. No matter how sweet or weak that the blue-haired boy appeared to be, that image was nothing but a lie, an illusion that anyone would accept when meeting him and that eventually would be corrected. Because although it seemed that the boy could start to tremble at any time, it would never be like that. Nagisa was firm, strong in his own way, he had endured many things alone, becoming a potential murderer. A devil with an angel smile.
She would have given anything to be like him, act like him, to have what he had. For a long time she had wanted to become a killer as talented he was, to carry out her revenge. She wanted to be a killer with a sweet and friendly facade, but with a lethal inside, like a snake. Like Shiota Nagisa.
The only difference between them is that Nagisa was strong and she wasn't. This is why he defeated her, this is why she fell in love with him.
Thinking about it, Kayano smiled like a lovesick fool as she watched the objects that were on the table.
Yes, she knew it. She was already sure about what to say to Nakamura.
Nagisa was like a pudding and she wasn't. This is why she liked him so much.
As much as Nagisa trembled, as much as he staggered, he would never collapse. He would remain the usual lively and sweet boy who received her in the morning with a nice smile. Ans she liked it, she loved it. Because she had came undone in the first quake, she was the failed pudding that was poorly done and nobody wanted. And that's why she admired so much those who managed to remain stable in any situation.
With her throughs sprinting in her mind and her pulse racing, she picked up the phone that had lain beside her throughout dinner and hurried to write a message to her blonde friend.
Maybe she wouldn't understand her answer, maybe she would even laugh. Probably Karma too, he would read her message too. But the one in love was her and she had her reasons, many reasons. But for now the only one that they would see would be that.
"He reminds me of a pudding."
Hi ~
Well, hello again, i'm not dead, i'm here, yes (?) It's so late here right now and I don't know what to say. This it's my first NagiKae (yes Karma and Gakushuu are not the only pairing that I like ejem) and I wrote this for the AnkyouWeek in tumblr ~ Probably I will appear with more one-shot but I can't promise nothing.
I know it's a little stupid to compare Nagisa with a pudding, but... Yes.
I hope someone liked it ~
See you (~*-*)~~(*-*~)
