a/n: I really dont want to talk about this, but believe me, history doesnt put me in Hatter's position. Young ones, please dont read. Rated for abuse and illegal sexual theft.
I'm mad.
Really, I am. I truly am. I put on my coat before my shirt and my shoes before my socks. I sleep before I wake. I dance before the party starts.
Wonderland has told me I'm mad for the longest time, but I ignored them. Why listen to someone who calls you mad when you know you truly are not? But I know that isn't the case anymore.
You see, it's your fault. If you had never wondered into my life, or into my tea party, I would never have noticed it. Now I'm living in a state of torment, thank you very much, Misses. My moments are filled with your face. So sweet, so young…fresh, like cream with a tint of berry. How I'd want to touch you. And when your hand brushed mine while you grabbed for your teacup…oh, did I want to grab that hand and place it on my skin. I moan now at nights with the ache of knowing that I will never have you. You are gone, and though I hate it, I know it's for the best on my sane side. I would have corrupted you for I am nothing little than a danger. You know I'm mad, right?
March watches me like a hawk on a hare when you ever come near. He knows of my wants, my sensual pull for you. He sees the needs that possess with this curse of Man. I can't help staring at your legs, oh, they are but paths to some forbidden garden guarding a fresh flower I cannot feel…oh, but all flowers needs stem, and dearest, I have yours. I need you, oh, please, just for one night. I want to show you what Wonderland really is, Miss Alice. I know you would love it. No…you would refuse with that wicked childlike innocence. Oh, I can feel that sweet innocence running down my lips. You've been naughty, Alice, and I need to teach you a lesson. Children grow up and you've refused.
Would you like to know what I'd do, Alice?
I'd tie your hands and bound you. You'd cry for your mother and father and sister and God but I'd know that it would be my only chance and Alice, please hush, you'll love it if you'd just give it a try and be quiet, please stop crying, I don't want to hurt you, please don't scream, Alice. Look what you made me do, Alice, and now you are bleeding on my table cloth. That's it, you naughty girl, I must teach you to behave whether you like it or not and, oh, I know I'll love it.
Alice, oh, Alice, please relax…oh, Alice, you are so delicious…
I'd hear your begs and they'd only fuel the fire more. I'd rip away your coverings and your under things and you'd be naked and I'd be so full of pleasure, Alice, oh, you would never know. I'd see your pale skin, with every smooth feature of a small girls body, and oh, I'd want to ruin you. I want to ruin you, Alice. Alice, hush, now, and spread your legs a bit more and Alice just, damn it, Alice, listen to me and it'll be over and Alice please, its hurts and I need to enter you, oh, Alice, I'm going to make you a woman, Alice, be excited, please, Alice don't cry, I need you not to cry, Alice, please, hush, love, please, please, Alice…please…I can't wait for you to grow up, Alice, I need you know. I want you know, and, Oh!...Alice…Ah…Alice…Alice…Alice…Please, say something…ah, Alice…please become real…please move…please…please…Alice…oh...oh...wake up...too good, too sweet...wake up...ah...
I'm mad, you know?