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"Jim you can't! It's too dangerous! You won't accomplish anything by going down there, the teleporters broke for one thing. The chances you'd even make it down are astronomical."
"There's still a chance! I have to go, let me go! I have to save him!"
"Jim he's gone! He's dead. There's nothing you can do for him!" Tears were making their way down the chief medical officer's cheeks. Jim went limp in Scotty's grasp.
"No. No." Quiet. Whimpering. Nothing like the Jim Bones knew. Vaguely McCoy wondered if that Jim would ever come back again.
"Later Jim. You can go back later. I promise." Jim nodded defeated. Scotty released him, and signaled for the others to do the same. Jim fell to his knees, head bent, sobbing. Spock. No.
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The transporter was fixed. Jim went down alone. He ran to where he had last seen his friend, his brother. It wasn't hard. Out of all the scattered bodies, Federation and Farnesian alike, only one was soaked in green. Jim ran to the crumpled form, pulled the Vulcan into his arms, sobbing, weeping, knowing that if Spock were here, he would be saying that Jim's behavior was illogical, except he wouldn't. Maybe he would have at first, but not now. Now their relationship was different. Now Spock would probably try to comfort his Captain, would try to ease the pain, and it would work, at least to some extent, because somehow Spock did that somehow he could make it all feel better, but now Spock was dead, dead forever, and it broke Jim to think it. No more chess games, no more incredulous eyebrow that said so many things at once, no more banter, no more insanely accurate statistics predicting doom time and time again. No more playful insults that only Spock could give. Spock's comment about Kirk's excellence at being a Nazi came to mind, only to be clamped upon, the pain entirely to much to handle. Jim tried to keep his emotions at bay, not to remember, but no more logic no more hobgoblin no more emotional denial, no more brother no more unwavering presence, nomorenomorenomorenomorenomorenomore. Kirk buried his face in Spock's chest, broken, shattered. Not Spock. Anyone but Spock. He was the captain, he was supposed to protect this man, not have the Vulcan die protecting him. Spock. Spock was gone forever. Forever, and nothing Jim would do could ever bring him back.