I do not own Bleach nor Calvin and Hobbes. Tite Kubo owns it.
"Happy birthday, Taichou." Rangiku gave Toushirou a box. He ripped it up and saw a white tiger. "Oh wow! A stuffed tiger!" He grabbed it and hugged it. Then he ran around the chair. Rangiku stared at him weirdly.
"Oh, boy..." She sighed.
"Why did they put indians on the cigar boxes?" Toushirou asked Byakko, his new tiger pal. "Cowboys weren't around back then; They only used it to promote masculinity." Then they ran around, playing cops and robbers. "Something's wrong with Captain Hitsugaya..." Nanao shook her head. Rangiku nodded.
"This is bullcrap!" Toushirou shouted in anger. "Yeah!" Byakko joined in. "Who are you talking to?" Unohana looked at him. "My pet tiger, Byakko. Can't you see him?" Toushirou pointed to the stuffed animal. "Toushirou-kun, that's a tiger doll." The captain of 4th division pointed out.
"NO, HE'S NOT! HE'S REAL! GET HER, BYAKKO!" The white tiger leapt at her and began clawing off the flesh on her body. "Haha! The white tiger strikes again!" Tousirou cackled as Unohana, who was unharmed due to Byakko being a stuffed animal, shook her head sadly.
"AAAH!" Toushirou screamed as he clutched his head in pain, due to the Reiatsu placed on his being. "Just give him this medicine once a day. This is the best way; Trust me." Unohana looked at Rangiku, who was sobbing on Isane's shoulder. "There, there, Rangiku-san." She comforted the busty vice captain.
Toushirou sat on the floor, looking at Byakko. "Byakko? Byakko?" He whimpered. "Toushi-chan." "BYAKKO!" Hitsugaya yelped in joy. "Toushi, your friends don't believe. We must show them." Byakko brung out some electrodes. Toushirou grinned.
Later, Toushirou was standing in front of an official from the 1st division. Rangiku had her eyes rolled up and she was drooling uncontrollably. "Sir, did you do this?" He looked at the chibi captain. "No, my tiger did!" Toushirou pointed to Byakko. "All right, sir, you're coming with me." He reached out to grab him, but Toushirou pulled his Zanpakuto out and sliced off his head.
"RUN, BYAKKO!" They ran out towards the 5th Division and saw Momo. "PEACHY!" He glomped her and looked around. "Take the bitch and go!" Byakko hissed.
"Toushirou-kun?" Momo whimpered as she saw the look in his eyes. "RAWG!" The chibi captain yelled out as he climbed the tower and stood on top of it. "TOP OF THE WORLD, MA!" He cackled wildly and swung Byakko around. Momo screamed as she looked down and saw the shinigami look on at them in horror.
"The top of the world is amazing!" Toushirou yelled. "Toushi- AAAAH!" Byakko fell from his hand and plummeted to his death. "BYAKKOOOOOO! NO!" Toushirou howled as he dove after him. "TOUSHIROU!" Momo shrieked in terror. The nearby Shinigami crowded together to catch him.
Later...
"The top of the world is amazing... The top of the world is amaziiing!" Toushirou was wrapped in a body cast and he giggled to himself. "Oh, Byakko, It's amazing!..." Toushirou cackled himself to sleep. Momo looked at him sadly and walked out, crying.
The end?