Witch Weekly

By: xoxdarknessxox

Summary: Draco and Harry are together in Hogsmeade. Harry is off doing an interview for Witch Weekly about the defeat of Voldemort only two months earlier. Things don't go as planned when the boys see the finished article…

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Draco Malfoy, nor am I plotting to try to kidnap them while they are sleeping. I'm not making any money off this, so anyone who wanted to sue me for that can just back off and find someone else, cuz all they'll get is my half of a Strawberry Pop-Tart .

It was nearly a month after the article had been written and it had finally hit newsstands in Hogsmeade. Draco of course had bought one, he was interested as to what Harry had told them this time, usually there was a blurb about him having a roommate. Harry and Draco had decided to keep their relationship from everyone until they were ready to drop the bomb, and they weren't ready yet. As Draco finished reading the article, he went back to their apartment and phoned Harry at his office in the Ministry.

"Hello?"

"Harry?"

"Yes this is he,"

"Did you read that article about you in Witch Weekly?"

"What? Draco? What are you on about?"

"The article you did for Witch Weekly, did you read it?"

"No, why?"

"…"

"Draco, what's wrong?"

"Were you perhaps, drunk when you gave that interview?"

"Not that I can remember,"

"Then you are a complete and bloody moron!"

"Calm down! What's wrong with what I said? I always say the same things 'I'm glad I defeated Voldemort, blah blah blah,'"

"Not this time you didn't,"

"What exactly did I say?"

"Well, since you asked, you told them about us!"

"I did no such thing!"

"Yes you bloody well did!"

"I would never do that!"

"Really? Well this article tells a different story!"

"Let's both calm down, what exactly did I say in the article?"

"Where to begin…"

"…Is it that bad?"

"Well there's the beginning of the interview when the interviewer asks you about the war and all that, of course you answer with the standardized 'I'm glad I defeated Voldemort' and then she asks you if you have a girlfriend,"

"I don't think I like where this is going…"

"You say, and I quote, 'A girlfriend? Not me, maybe if the girl suddenly got a cock, then I would consider dating her...' at this the interviewer asked you if you were gay,"

"Please do NOT tell me I said I was gay…"

"Harry you didn't actually confess to being gay, but you did confess to being in a relationship with someone you had been enemies with for your whole life,"

"No, no, no, no, no…"

"Yes, yes, and yes! You told them that you were currently seeing your enemy! What were you thinking? Did someone cast Imperio on you before this interview? Because that's the only way I'll believe you!"

"I'm going to hang myself,"

"I'll do it for you,"

"But before then, I'll drink and then go and strangle everyone who works at Witch Weekly!"

"Hey! Don't blame them for you being a complete idiot!"

"I am not an idiot!"

"Oh really? Who told them about us if it wasn't you?"

"You know you never actually told me that I told them anything about you specifically. All you told me was that I said I was gay and was dating my enemy,"

"Oh wait…let me find the page….got it!"

"…This is not going to end well,"

"Here, in this part of the interview she asks you what the name of your boyfriend is-"

"I would never tell that! It's lies, all lies!"

"You say, 'His name rhymes with Wako Jalfoy…'. WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?! Wako Jalfoy?! Are you completely nutters!?"

"…I'm sorry?"

"Sorry? Sorry?! That's all?!"

"I love you?"

"Was that a question or a statement Harry?"

"A statement."

"It better be for your sake…"

"Are we still going out tonight?"

"Do not try to change the subject!"

"I'm not! I was just wondering whether we were going out,"

"Well I guess it doesn't matter since the whole wizarding world knows about us!"

"I really don't know why I said those things, if that helps?"

"Well it doesn't!"

"Besides it's not like anybody actually reads that trash anyway,"

"Every girl reads this Harry!"

"Hey, why were you reading it?"

"You and I both know that I read every magazine there is about you. It's my hobby,"

"Well you need a new hobby,"

"You need a new brain, preferably one that works!"

"What day was it that I gave that interview?"

"I think it was the fifth of last month…why?"

"I'm trying to remember what I did that day-"

"I'll tell you what you did! You told the world about us you bastard!"

"It's not like they wouldn't have found out eventually,"

"They would've found out when I was ready, and guess what…I'm not ready!"

"Okay, I understand, but it's over now,"

"Really? Tell that to the seventy or so reporters standing outside our building,"

"Are you kidding?"

"Oh yes I was kidding, it's all a joke Harry. You didn't-"

"Draco?"

"You didn't say all those things to the interviewer-"

"Draco?"

"What?"

"I'm flooing home,"

"And then what? Telling them all to bugger off?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact I will, I'll see you in a few minutes,"

"Harry….Harry?…Bugger this!"

Draco hung up the phone and proceeded to pace the living room floor, every few seconds he'd look out the window and see the reporters busily snapping photographs at their apartment.

"Oomph!" Harry said as he tumbled out of the fireplace, he had never quite gotten the hang of flooing.

"Well, now that you're here. What are you going to do about this?" Draco asked as he pointed to the window, where both could see many camera flashes going off.

"This." At this statement, Harry opened their window stuck his head out and surveyed the reporters with a cold glare. He cast a sonorous charm on his voice and spoke.

"Listen up! I don't come to your homes and take pictures of you, so bloody back off! And yes, my roommate is in here and NO he doesn't want to talk to any one of you! Also, if you don't get out of here in the next two minutes I will curse you so bad that it'll make what I did to Voldemort look like a walk in the park! NOW GO!" Harry promptly closed the window, took the charm off his voice, and collapsed on their sofa.

"How was that?"

"A bit overdramatic if you ask me," Draco drawled as he smirked at Harry from where he was seated in the armchair across from him.

"But you love me anyway,"

"Merlin knows why…"

After the days events both of them went to bed and slept soundly. The next morning Harry went to work, and Draco got another issue of Witch Weekly, he was curious as to why Harry's face was on the cover again. When he read the contents he immediately went home, which was difficult seeing as how he was being blinded by flashes everywhere he went, and phoned Harry at his office.

"Hello?"

"Hello darling,"

"Draco, why are you calling here?

"I picked up a copy of Witch Weekly,"

"And this concerns me why?"

"Because on the cover is you screaming at the reporters!"

"Not again!"

"It says that you were defending my honor! My fucking honor!"

"Okay Draco, tell me what else it says…" Harry replied with a smile as he sat back in his chair. He loved Draco, he really did. He loved how he could get worked up over the tiniest thing, and he loved how he took the time to yell at him nearly everyday for something he had said the previous day. He put his feet up on his desk and settled in for a long conversation, because Merlin knew Draco could yell at him for hours without tiring out.

AN 2: Okay, so I don't like the ending for this that much, but it was the best I could do. This was like the third copy of this thing so I hope it's not as bad as I think it is. Don't forget to review to tell me what you think!