"Call Conner and tell him I loooove him this much" Tim singsonged before opening his arms wide which almost made him fall off the sofa.
Sat on the couch from across the teenager Jason laughed and fished his cell phone inside his jacket pocket, not giving a fuck about the disapproving look Dickhead was shooting his way as he started recording the scene.
Tim wasn't paying attention though, he seemed to be in his own happy little world since he bumped into Ivy while patrolling. Bruce was down in the Batcave working on an antidote and Damian was quietly watching from the corner of the library.
"Anything else you want me to do, Timmy?" Dick asked. Still with a silly smile on his face Tim got up and started to dance around himself like a ballerina.
"You need to call Bart too. Oh! And Cassie to tell them how much I love them" his face turned serious as he got closer to Dick, placed one hand on each side of his face and squeezed making him look like a fish "You can't forget about any of them, Dick" he whispered: "I love them."
Dick laughed and took his chance to hug his little brother. When was the last time he had this chance? He wasn't going to waste it.
"I won't Baby Bird. I got you. I love my teammates too."
Jason was about to put his phone away because what he thought was going to be really useful blackmail material turned out to be loads of sentimental shit but them Tim made a funny face and shook his head.
"No Dick. I love love them like Bruce loves loves Clark. And Jason loves loves Roy and Kory" he pouted looking all sad suddenly "They're my partners."
Dick blinked slowly not quite understanding what Timmy was saying.
"You mean like 'let's kick some villain asses' kind of partners?"
Tim shook his head 'no' while a shy smile appeared on his face and a giggle escaped his lips.
"No silly, I mean like 'I want to have their Babies' kind of partners" and then burst out laughing.
Of course the big Bat chose that exact moment to show up in the library with his cowl down looking like he desperately needed to sleep and holding what should be the antidote.
"Dad!" Jason exclaimed without missing a beat. There was a huge scary smile on his face and Bruce mentally flinched. Whenever Jason called him 'dad' he knew something was going to happen and make him wonder why he became one in the first place "You won't believe what just happened."
But before he could say anything else Damian jumped from the chair and made his way quickly to Bruce.
"Father" he took a notebook from out of nowhere and handed it to Bruce "A few months ago I took the liberty to start what I like to call 'The Drake List of Shame'. Inside this notebook you'll find all of Drake's mistakes and awkward moments described in precise details. The last one has been witnessed just now" Damian raised an eyebrow "Perhaps you'll finally come to realize that I'm the most suitable choice to replace you as Batman one day."
And just like that he left the library looking very pleased with himself.
Bruce decided then and there that he was just going to shove the antidote down his third son's throat and call it a night. But nooo, he thought bitterly as Jason stopped right in front of him and said:
"You better sit down to watch this. Trust me."
Tim sure could survive two more minutes without the antidote; he thought as he just did as told and sat down. It didn't make any difference. Bruce fell off the sofa after watching the recording having Jason's laughter as the only background noise.
When Alfred made his way into the library later he found Master Jason laughing hysterically on the couch while Master Tim slept peacefully on another. Master Richard was oddly standing still like a statue and the butler was about to approach him in the moment he spotted Master Bruce lying on the floor seeming to be in pain.
"Master Bruce? May I inquire what happened?"
"My son. My poor, innocent son" was the reply.
Since Master Jason was too busy laughing and Master Bruce seemed incapable to give any coherent answer he turned to the oldest son.
"Master Richard? What happened?"
Dick didn't answer though. He barely blinked or breathed as he tried hard to take the images of his – poor, innocent – little brother having sexual intercourse with not one, but three metas off his mind.