I don't own Naruto.

Converting

When Naruto left to retrieve Sasuke after he had defected, no one realized the full consequences of the act. In accordance to demon rule #143 the mate of said demon would offer a challenge, should the challenge be passed then no force on earth can tear the two mates apart.

Kyuubi, who was (unfortunately for Naruto) gay was kind enough to inform Naruto of this, but only after he had hade a promise to the pink-haired one. After all, the fox wasn't stupid, and if he wasn't going to be released any time soon than he was damn well going to make sure his host at least got a male partner.

Realizing that his mouth had finally doomed him, Naruto barricaded himself in his mind swimming in Pool of Denial (quite literally as he just thought one up). Letting the fox roam free was probably not the smartest of moves, but luckily, the Kyuubi was extremely single-minded and right now he wanted a mate for his kit (and consequently himself); destroying the world could come after. In the guise of Naruto, the demon easily reclaimed the running pre…mate (using some rope and chakra suppression seals to keep from accidentally killing him, then gagging him when he wouldn't shut up).

The wounded warriors returned back victorious and upon walking through the gates were met by Kakashi, Tsunade and Sakura. There was laugher and happy tears all around until the not-Naruto threw his head back in a dark cackle, making sure not to drop Sasuke from over his shoulder. When asked what was 'wrong' he practically purred. "Nothing at all. I just caught my kit a good mate."

Tsunade was the first to respond, "Your kit…you mean…"her eyes widened in shock (switched into a defensive position) "You are the Kyuubi!"

Rolling his eyes the fox casually waved her worries aside "Bah. I'm not here to destroy your pathetic village, I would never have been able to escape the seal if my intensions were…impure." Sakura opened her mouth to comment but was ruthlessly cut off. "Instead, I have decided that it was high time my kit got a mate." Here there was a suspicious cough that seemed to resemble sex deprivation.

Kakashi decided that he should point out a fact in his student's favor, "Well…he is only thirteen and has had minimal human contact."

If it wasn't a maleficent evil (old) deity that was speaking, everyone present would have sworn he was whining. "But I'm not thirteen and him not having a sex life means that I don't have one." Quickly speaking over the very awkward silence, the fox decided to press his point "Anyway, because of his horrible romantic taste, (Kyuubi threw a not-so-subtle glance at Sakura) I kindly picked out a mate for him, and even completed the mating ritual. Now I just have too soul bind the two together and kick the kit out of hiding.

Sounding way to chipper, Kyuubi managed to shock most of his audience into silence. Luckily Kakashi kept his wits and managed to ask -what he assumed- everyone was thinking, "Just what is a soul bind?"

Looking even happier non-Naruto replied (while shifting Sasuke so he'd stop trying to get free…or dropped) "A seal that will kill the owner should they ever attempt to kill their mate or if they should ever try to cheat on their mate while he/she is still alive. Not much good and it's usually only some of the more jealous women, but I thought it would be appropriate in this case."

Tsunade, finally recovered, tried to help her pseudo brother "What makes you think we would let you put this seal on Naruto and his mate?"

The fox grin came across just fine "I could always just destroy Konoha…" Tsunade silently prayed that Naruto would get along with his new spouse.

Sensing victory the fox hoisted Sasuke higher and prepared to walk off, being stopped by Sakura's defeated voice "Just who is it that you picked to be Naruto's mate?"

Naruto's possessed body looked back and smirked with wicked amusement "Why…the only person I would even consider a potential partner. In fact…" he mused, seemingly mostly to himself "…it will probably be the only person we could both agree on."

Sakura glared at the Kyuubi, fearing the worst "Well, who is she?!"

Seemingly horribly sickened (the green tinge to his skin giving him away) he managed to choke out "Sure as hell isn't you." Managing to push back his gag reflex the demon continued speaking even as he headed toward the apartment that Naruto (and, by default, himself) lived in "Besides, who said that a mate has to be female?"

The awkward silence was broken by Sakura "but…Naruto's not gay, is he?"

Without pausing in his stride he responded with a sly smile "No worries. I am sure I can corrupt…I mean, convert him onto the 'better' path."

Tsunade took over the questioning, attempting to wrangle a few more answers from the retreating demon "Who is this mate then?"

Non-Naruto paused looking slightly confused "You haven't figured it out yet? Of course the only one we ever might agree on would be the Uchiha."

This time when the fox walked away no one stopped him, being too stunned to act. So the trio watched as the possessed Naruto walked away with the desperately squirming Sasuke, and decided that they really didn't want to know.