Disclaimer: Not Stephenie Meyer. Boo hoo. Not my characters (except for Vanessa). (but I own the plot! Mwahahahahahaha!)
Ok, so I don't really know, but I hope that this is the first time that someone has done this, if not, then I hope that mine is the best. This takes place after Twilight, but before New Moon. YAY TWILIGHT!! (if you have not yet seen the holy trailer, please do so NOW!)
(EPOV)
We were all sitting at our usual lunch table, the "good guys," as Bella says on one side with us, and the "other ones" on the opposite end of the rectangular table. I had an untouched slice of pizza in front of me while Bella casually picked at her French fries. Forks High didn't exactly have the best lunch program. I had my arm around her shoulders, remembering to support it so that I didn't crush her. Lauren, Jessica, Eric, Tyler, Mike, Angela, and Ben all just got up and disposed of their lunches and exited the cafeteria, which just left me, Bella, and Alice at the table.
"Oh just do it already," Alice said, exasperatedly. And I knew exactly what she was talking about, of course. I leaned over and gently cupped Bella's chin while a brought my cold, hard lips to her warm, plump, soft ones. As our lips began to move together, that was when I heard it.
Edward Cullen is a mind-reading vampire! Someone thought from across the room. I wrenched my face away from Bella's and turned in the direction of the "voice." It was coming from the usually-quiet bookworm, Vanessa. She was sitting at a table full of talkative people, Sammi, Alex, Dillon, Caroline, Grace, Zack, Katherine, and Alice, but her back was turned to them because she was engrossed in a book whose title I could distinguish to be "Twilight." I could hear the words of the book through her mind, "'You are observant, aren't you?' I didn't answer; I just listened to the sound of his laugh, committing it to memory. 'Were you hunting this weekend, with Emmett?' I asked when it was quiet again. 'Yes.' He paused for a second, as if deciding whether or not to say something. 'I didn't want to leave, but it was necessary. It's a bit easier to be around you when I'm not thirsty.'"
This. Is. Fucking. Creepy. That is the exact conversation that I has with Bella a few months ago when we were driving home from Port Angeles that night. Then, Vanessa looked up and stared at me. It's funny how the characters in this story all have the exact same names as people here: Edward Cullen, Bella Swan, Emmett, Rosalie, Alice, Jasper, Chief Swan, Carlisle, Esme, Mr. Banner, Jessica, Mike Newton, Eric Yorkie, Tyler Crowley. Holy shit! This can't possibly be just a coincidence! Maybe this book was really written about them! But how would Stephenie Meyer know all of this? It HAS to be true, though, I mean, look at the way Edward is staring at me. He knows that I know. I wonder if he can really read my mind. Hi Edward! Can you hear me? I don't know what came over me, maybe it was just an involuntary reflex, which, being a vampire, I should be able to control, but I NODDED at her. OMG! It's true. They ARE vampires and he CAN read minds and Alice can probably see the future too!
I'd had enough of this. I left the cafeteria at a casual pace, but when I observed the empty hallways, I bolted. I ran to the Forks library and destroyed every copy of "Twilight" they had, which was only two. I then ran to Port Angeles, and went to every book store. By the end of the next seven hours, I had destroyed every copy of "Twilight" in the continental US, Canada, Alaska, Mexico, Latin America, swam across the Panama Canal, and every copy in South America. Except for one. I read every person's mind and if they had a copy, I burned it. If they had already read it, I hit them just softly enough to make them forget. Except for one, Vanessa. She had already read the book 59 times (Vanessa, if you're reading this, don't be mad at me! And for anyone else, Vanessa only read it twice, but I read it 62 times…), so even if I gave her a mild concussion, it would not erase all memory of the book, and I didn't dare hit her any harder in case I seriously hurt her. So what could I do but bribe her to tell no one?