From A Touch to a Strike

[My Master]

My hands are shaking, my heart is pounding, my head is sweating and I can't think right. Covering my red face with my white hair, I refuse to look at Master. He's happy now – happy as can be and that makes me happy, but I have to keep my mouth shut – Master cannot know how I think. I'm only alive when I'm with him: I'm spinning, my blood is running and pumping, which he proves with every slice he gives me. That's why he makes me feel pain. It's because Master loves me; he wants to show me my red liquid; he wants me to know I can feel and that my heart can pound. Master loves me more then the others – Master has a hint that I'm growing; that I'm gaining a mind. It's me and Master; Master and me. It makes my heart flutter thinking about our lovely, deepened relationships others would view with such scorn.

"You seemed flushed, my Kirschwasser," Master whispers in my ear. My – I am his. O, that makes me smile. "Did I make your heart pound enough?" he places a hand above my bare chest, feeling my heart pounding under his strong hand. My skin tingles when he touches me, and I can feel myself going redder. He makes my cheek burn with such heat, its as if someone has set my face in the oven.

I let my blue lips curl inwards to a sweet smile I know that he will like, hopefully. He smiles back, which makes my heart fly. "You're so cute, my darling."

"So … real?" I whisper, hoping he would agree. His chin leans on my head, and I can feel him breath in the smell of my white, straight-as-a-pin locks.

"Well, your blood is moving, isn't it?" Master says his voice as soft as velvet yet it has that usual venom drop to it. His voice can be menacing, cruel at times, yet it is a warning. That tone, that tone he just used is a warning and I prepare myself, wondering what Master will do to prove my existence.

He put his finger on my skin on my arm, and I gasp as his nail sharply digs into my soft skin. I feel him tare my skin; my arm beginning to sting. He takes his head off mine, showing me that eerie smile of his: his purple eyes had changed from ones that hinted love and desire, to ones with cruelty and something else that would frighten little children away. My skin is stinging, trembling from that pain he is giving to me. It feels slightly wet; something is running from where he has torn me. Yes, its blood, my blood.

He brings his finger to my face, where I can see my red blood on the tip of it. Before I know it, I can taste my metallic blood, which made me feel sick to the bone. My tongue works around his finger that he has rudely placed inside of me, taking away that horrible liquid for him. I cough a few times when he takes his bloodless finger from my mouth; I wipe my blood onto the top of my hand, taking it off my tongue and I stare down at the soft white sheets we are sitting on. My eyes glaze as I sit, deep in thought. I can feel the warmth from his skin; he is so close to me I can hear him breathing. I can feel the coldness of his emotions and the creepiness that was emitting from them. I wonder what had happened – just moments ago we were one – we were happy and now he is being cold again.

His finger suddenly touch my lip gently, which made me quickly look into his eyes, which had changed yet again. I can't help but smile in joy, in pure happiness. He did want me – he wanted me and he wanted me to feel real.

That's what makes me different.

He plays with the others for his pleasure, doesn't he? It's all a self gain game when it comes to them, but when it comes to me, I'm a different game entirely. He does it to give me pleasure, as well as him; he does it so I can feel my blood dancing in my veins; so I can feel my heart jumping up and down and so I can feel the burning of my cheeks when he touches me. It's so he can make me feel human. I've been there through the fights: I've been there through the pain and through the happiness. I'm the only Kirschwasser for Master, the others are useless. That is why he took me first and the others after. The others are just used for when he gets angry or when he has his … moments.

It's intimacy with me and Master.

It's a game with the others and Master.

I'm always the one Mad Master smiles at: I'm the Queen of his Chessboard: I'm like the sun in the morning for him; I save him from the darkness, and bring him into the light. I am Master's and no one else's: it's me and him.

He kissed me gently, sliding his tongue into my mouth. My eyes shut and I savoured the moment before I kissed Master back, wrapping my arms around his body. My fingers brushed against his soft skin; his brushed against mine. He can feel it: I'm human, I'm real. I'm flying as we kissed; I'm flying at the thought of going further with Master and so is he.

But before I had a chance to enjoy the moment, or even think more of what could happen, he thrust me onto the floor again, snapping as usual. My back hit the floor sharply, and a large squeal escaped my mouth in pain. I felt like my back had broken; I've got a weak body after all. A weak body that provides me with tons of pain. He threw my cloths onto me, ordering me to get dressed. I did so silently, as his back was turned to me; he was getting dressed himself in that outfit that made him look like a beautiful angel. How I love my white Master.

He was telling me how my sisters are to die: how he is using them to upset my other sister, who is also known as Momo. I did wish Master killed the others soon – they say we're all connected, but that doesn't matter. They just get in the way of me and Master – soon it'd be the two of us. My back was still aching as I got dressed, and my straight hair was slightly messy but I could understand Master's strike – he was stressed and he needed to express his anger. That was it – he would never harm me on purpose.

Later, I waited, ordered by Master to distract Rubedo. I did: I would do anything for Master. I would do absolutely anything! So I did, but when I was in that room, watching Master hold the pink headed little girl in such a delicate way I couldn't help but feel that anger and jealously I had felt before with the others. I hated that girl, even though I had shown her our Father. I hated looking like her at that moment, and I hated that Rubedo who was saying such impolite things about Master.

I couldn't really help myself. I didn't mean to find my hands wrapped around Rubedo's neck, squeezing his air pipe tightly. I couldn't understand how it happened. One moment I stood there, next I was strangling the boy with strong hands. Master was saying wonderful things about me: how I was the perfect conscious. Master loves me. I knew that then for definite.

I couldn't remember what happened after that. I remember waking up, being needed by Master. I think the redhead knocked me out. When I awoke, I found myself aiding him to fight. But as we did, we failed. I had a split second to make a choice and I gave second thoughts.

I stayed behind for him. I gave my life for him. Why did I do so?

I love him.

Sacrifice is what humans can do, yes?

I am human,

I am loved by Master,

And I love my dear Master.

Comments –

I wrote this a few months back, and I deleted it off the website. Going through my documents, I found it again and decided to re-upload it only for the simple fact I adore the Kirschwassers and Albedo, obviously. This is just a really quick summary for a Kirschwasser that, unlike the others, has a mind, and unlike most "normal" people, has grown to accept the strange "love" her dear Master gives to her. When the only bit of love the girl has felt is from the madman, who is to say that it isn't real in her eyes? I wondered how a Kirschwasser would feel if they were real, and unlike Faith of my Bitter Sweet story (who has an entirely different issue then Kirsch). So yeah: I'm gonna keep working on this to get it better, because I think I could've done so much better with the descriptions. I've never wrote in present tense either, so it was kind of a test to that!~ No harsh comments xP