A/N: m/m, KakaIru, deathfic, angst rated T to be on the safe side, I hope... My first fic so be nice okay? :3

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

He smiled

It had been three weeks since then.

Three weeks.

He was still half asleep when he felt a soft kiss on his forehead.

"Goodbye Ruru, and sorry…"

He felt chakra flowing into him making him fall asleep. Later on when he woke up, he'd find a letter besides him, full of useless, petty excuses for leaving him.

Three weeks he hadn't gone out, refused seeing anyone, even Naruto. He was lying on his bed, holding onto the letter and his former lovers mask and sobbing miserably. Again. For how long had he been doing that? He didn't know. Kakashi had left. He was well aware of it, but his scent was still lingering in the air, making the tan chunin only sadder if possible. Every time he closed his eyes, he could still see his lover walking around the small rooms of his apartment. Tears ran across his face as he inhaled the silver haired jounins scent from the mask he was holding tightly in his hands.

"He's gone on an S ranked mission? Alone?" Iruka was in Tsunaides office. She had called in the academy teacher during the third day he'd pretended to be ill. "Yes," she said, "That Hatake brat can manage it by himself, I'd think." "But Hokage-sama-!" "I've told you to call me Tsunaide, Hokage makes me feel old." "Yes Hok—I mean Tsunaide-sama, but I'm still worried…" Tsunaide nodded and said, "Yes I agree that's not how you leave someone, through a letter no least. When he'll be back I'll send him to you right after I've lectured him, that okay?" Iruka smiled, "Thank you."

What would he think of him right now? He hadn't been taking care of himself. His hair was dirty and messy; his clothes were lying on the floor, unwashed. He hadn't eaten in days, he couldn't have cared less.

A field and two men. Dark red stains all over the older one, the younger holding the other.

"Kakashi!! Please, Kashi open your eyes! Look at me!" He held the jounin as carefully as he could, desperately trying to stop the bleeding at the same time. "Kashi!" The wounded man seemed to try to focus his eyes on Iruka, failing miserably. "I'm sorry 'Ruka…" His voice was a mere whisper, "So sorry…" "Don't talk! Stay with me love, look at me!" He didn't have enough chakra to teleport them at the hospital, or even to Konoha. What could he do? He couldn't lose him now! "Maybe…" Kakashi coughed blood "I don't have the right to say this…" He was bleeding so much; he wouldn't make it in time if they didn't get to the hospital now! "Shh, love, don't talk anymore." Iruka tried to hush the older man who didn't stop. "…But I-"he coughed again, "I want you to now that I still love you…" Tears ran on the younger mans face, almost blinding him. "Don't say that, you're going to be alright, and then we'll go home and-"He stopped when he saw his lovers' eyes darken and his gaze fade away for ever.

Iruka sighed heavily. He wanted so bad to see the jounin again… Maybe he could, maybe there was a way? He reached for his pocket and found what he had wanted to. Would Kakashi be happy to see him again? Surely he would. He'd take the chunin in his arms and embrace him like he'd always done, and then everything would be alright...

Well, it was actually quite easy, he thought. He was still lying in the bed, crimson coloured stains around him growing all the time. One tear escaped from him and ran down his cheek, mixing with the blood slowly leaking form his wrists. He'd finally be able to meet his beloved…

Iruka saw the mismatched eyes before him...

He smiled