My name is Gardevoir
In all my years of living, never was I forced to suffer such a cruel fate.
Brendan, that foolish but faithful trainer, left home to go on a excursion with his equally foolish mate, May. I paid little attention to Brendan's gibberish, but recalled something being said about an anniversary today. This happened every year, and every year he would subject me to a fate worse than death. Left behind, forced to do his dirty work and protect our household in Littleroot. It was unjust, despicable, and there will be hell to pay if he does not own up to his promise of food and tribute. Babysitting was a fate no pokemon should endure.
In their naivety, Brendan and May gave birth to two twerps several years ago. Twerp was the most accurate word to describe them, as they had a knack for being insufferably annoying and devious. Their son, Haru, gained his mother's looks while Yuka, the daughter, resembled her father. Interestingly enough both of their hairs are snow white, an important fact that Brendan did not piece together yet. Taking care of them was easy the first few years and I had little problems being a backup sitter, but apparently I'm not supposed to use hypnosis to put them to sleep for long periods of time. I was forced to actually interact with the brats upon Brendan learning of my brilliant babysitting tactics. It is not to say I hate the twerps. In fact, I do have a great deal of interest in them, but for reasons neither parents know; they are gifted.
Both children inherited psychic talents, as well as my special gifts that only Brendan is privy of knowing. Since this discovery I trained and honed their talents when the parents were unaware, crafting their already incredible potential into a tool of immense power. In years their powers would eventually rival mine, and together we could make humankind rue the day for what they did to me so many years ago. But there was one major flaw I did not account for as I began teaching them the way of the psychics and communicating via psychic link. They began talking. A lot. To me. Even worse, they took a liking to me and started calling me foolish things such as-
"Uncle G, can you tell us a story?" I glared at the grinning disciples who sat on the carpet floor in front of me. They knew how I hated being called that and continued doing so, probably to spite me.
"No. And you're supposed to call me Master when your parents are not here." They rarely did, but I try to get my victories where I can get them. I was hoping to teach them the art of foresight and psychic assaults today, but they seemed to have more interest in stories than the destruction of our enemies. Their foolishness were certainly inherited from their parents as well.
"Aw, but mommy and daddy tells us stories all the time. You never tell us any fun stories." Haru whined.
"My only job is to keep you two alive. I am not your entertainment."
Yuka was a dangerous one. Even with my superior intellect and psychic prowess, her level of cunning at times caught me off guard. "Please, Master Gardevoir?"
I despised their faces when they got, dare I say, cute. Those damnable, pleading eyes and a pitiful expression that tore at my very soul. It was enough to make even me waver. My gaze went astray, willing myself to not stare into the deadly void of temptation. "I shall not be swayed by your trickery. I won't repeat myself."
The boy, though not as cunning as his sister, was quick witted and knew how to adapt to a situation quickly. "You are such a wonderful master. Please tell us a story, Master Gardevoir."
"Why you conniving little...!" I could no longer resist their coercing attempts. Damn them all. However, this would not go without punishment for pushing me this far. I was given strict guidelines on my methods of punishment by their parents, though I still believe giving them nightmares was most effective. Instead, I had to resort to a less effective means of teaching them a lesson.
"Please Master Gardevoir?"
"Tell us a story, Master Gardevoir!"
"SILENCE!" Using my psychic powers, I lifted their small bodies into the air and spun them rapidly . When satisfied I would throw them somewhere soft to avoid injury, such as the couch on the other side of the living room. Such a punishment was enough to throw them off balance and shut them up for awhile as they recovered from their dizzied state. Unfortunately, in time they began to enjoy such a rigorous punishment and sometimes even agitated me on purpose just to get their sick kicks. Since it was the only punishment I was able to do, my hands were tied. With a sigh, I gave in to their incessant demands. "...What kind of story do you want to hear?"
Despite being incredibly dazed, their smiles were wide and cheerful. I could already feel a headache forming. Yuka went first. "Can you tell us something about mom and dad? Like how they met and stuff?"
"How about how we were born?" Haru joined in on the questioning.
Such boring questions. Regardless, I am a pokemon of my word. A story they would get. I looked to Yuka first. "Your father was sleeping on the road and your mother thought he was dead. Then they started dating. The end." Next was Haru and his question. "As for how you two were born, your father unwittingly put his penis into your mother. Months later you two arrived. The end." The two kids giggled to each other.
"Uncle G is so funny! I like when he tells stories!" Haru chuckled to his sister.
"He said penis!" Laughed Yuka.
My irritation grew with each chuckle. They wanted a story and they got it. Now they mock me? In a fit of anger I flipped them into the air with my psychic talents, spun them in the process before dropping them back onto the couch. "If you are done mocking me, I shall bid you two farewell-"
"Wait!" Haru called out just as I turned to go upstairs. "Can you tell us one more story?"
"What, so you can mock me some more? No. And that's final."
"Pleeeeease, Master Gardevoir? We're sorry for upsetting you!" The two chimed in simultaneously, and again putting on their cute display.
"...SILENCE!" I always did detest how conniving they could be at times. And again, I punished them their insolence. "One. You only get one more story, and that's it."
"Yay! You're the best!"
"You rock, Master Gardevoir!"
"Yes, yes, I know. Just tell me what you want to hear." I slowly turned, my scowl turning into a prideful smirk. Foolish they may be, at least they understood and respected my greatness.
The two began whispering to each other, whispering what I didn't care. If I was truly curious I would just scour their thoughts. After a moment of deliberation the two faced me with a most curious stare. "Can you tell us a story about yourself?" The girl asked.
"And about how you met dad? Dad doesn't like to talk about it."
It was a surprising request, though I could understand Brendan's hesitation. "You wish to learn...about me?" I did not sense any false intentions from their minds; they truly wished to understand me. For a moment, a foreign sense of belonging and joy washed over me. These disciples always pestered me about various topics, but this was the first time they directly asked about my past. It was a unique privilege to learn about one as great as I. Brendan was the only human I felt comfortable enough to talk about my past with, though it is only because he was directly tied to it. May, though interested, was off limits to me. Brendan wanted to tell her himself when the time was right, a wish I respected. However, he neglected to mention anything about the children, an opportunity I would gladly take.
"So, you wish to know the truth and history of your father and I, correct?" My disciples nodded eagerly. "Fine then. I will tell you all about us. Be warned, for this is a story for only the bravest disciples. You cannot tell anyone this story, not even your parents. Understood?" Again they nodded, this time with determination in their eyes. It was likely this story was long overdue for them. Who am I to deny them such a glorious tale?
"Steel yourselves, for this is a tale only few have the honor of hearing. Everything began with a secret project very few humans even knew existed; Operation Sync."