POOR GEORGE
Summary: Lots of stories have been written about Rimmer finding out that the crew died. What about George McIntyre, who was around when the crew died, and had to be deactivated so Rimmer could be generated? Please R&R!
Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters but, boy, I wish I did, because this situation and these characters are brilliant. Rob, Doug, you guys rock!
CHAPTER 1
"He's back! Hey, everybody, George is back," Sam Murray called over the bleep-beeps and the bloop-boops of the drive room. George walked in, and was met with a short round of applause.
Captain Hollister walked over to him. "George! How was your leave?"
"Just fine, captain," he said. "I appreciate the time off."
"How are you holding up?" Brown asked.
"As well as can be expected," McIntyre replied. "I've still got to get used to not having any touch."
"Oh, you poor man."
"Really, it's not so bad. I could be a lot worse off. I still have my health, after all," he said. "And I still have the rest of you all. You've been like family to me these past years."
"Well," the captain said, "do you think you're ready to get back to duty?"
"Ready and willing, sir," George said. He moved over to his console, which had been rigged up to be photosensitive so that he could still use it.
The captain went back into his office, and Brown followed. "Duty roster for today, sir," she said. He glanced over it, like he did most days. But today, something caught his attention.
"Rimmer?" he asked.
"Yes," she replied, with a bit of a sigh creeping into her voice.
"Rimmer's hardly qualified for the job he has now! Just last week I ordered a chicken soup and got mashed potatoes with diced chilies and chocolate sauce."
"Don't worry," Carol said. "Lister's there."
"That's not making me feel any better," Hollister said.
"Look, I agree, he's a complete slob, but he seems to at least know more about what he's doing than Rimmer."
"A psychotic elephant that's had its trunk ripped off could do better at Rimmer's job."
"Lister's only been with the corps for eight months, but when he comes up for promotion, we should probably make him Second Tech."
While she was saying this, the captain had gotten a message from the ship's lab. It was a fax with a photograph enclosed. "I don't know," he said, looking at the message. "I have a feeling Lister's going to be away for a bit."
------------------------------
"What do you mean, he's not here?" Rimmer asked, incredulously.
"Lister's not on duty for a while," Grace Allender said again, more slowly so that Rimmer could understand. "You're on your own today. Lister's been sent to stasis for keeping a cat."
"Oh, fine. Great. Just great,"
"I thought you knew," she said. "Todhunter said you spoke to him right before he went in last night."
"Ah, last night," Rimmer said. "Last night I was… not feeling well. I probably didn't notice." So far, few people knew that he had fainted during his exam. Also, precious few knew that, due to ink poisoning from copying all his notes onto his body, he'd had to go down to the medical unit and have all his blood replaced with Synth. Having to have a transfusion isn't too embarrassing when it happens once, but they'd done the same thing to him after Lister served him Freaky Fungus for breakfast, and he didn't want it to appear like this was becoming habit. "I just don't think I can do this alone."
"Don't panic, Rimmer. If you need anything, just call me, alright?"
"Fine, OK," Rimmer said, and walked off, scowling. "One person alone to mend the drive plate. How do they expect anyone to do it properly?" Rimmer crawled into the maintenance shaft. 5,000 circuits to re-route and lock down. 5,000. That was quite a lot. He started in on the task. An hour later, he had only finished 50. "This is gonna take ages," he muttered. But then he noticed something. Something he hadn't seen before. What if, instead of interfacing with each circuit, he programmed the computer to make the same change to all the circuits at once? He could save time, and probably the engineers would congratulate him on coming up with such a good technique. He might even get to skip the exams and go straight to being an officer! He punched in the codes.
------------------------------
"What kind of problem," Hollister asked.
"Apparently," Grace replied from the engine deck, "Rimmer set the computer up to do his circuit locks for him. He didn't realize that some had to be set the opposite way."
"What are we looking at? Engine overload?"
"I'm afraid it might be… much more serious, sir. We're trying to lock it down."
"Understood. Where's Rimmer now?"
"He was on his way up there a minute ago, sir. He should arrive anytime."
Captain Hollister turned to McIntryre. "George, you and Kochanski set a course back to the nearest repair facility. We're going to need it, I imagine."
Rimmer ran in just then. McIntyre moved out of the way to avoid being walked through. He and stood next to Kochanski and started running over the figures with her.
"Rimmer!" The captain shouted. "What have you done now?"
"Captain, I do want to say how completely and utterly sorry I am, and I…"
"You are worthless, Rimmer! I've tried to look the other way, and tried to help you out. But you are just so incompetent. How did you ever get into the Space Corps?"
"Sir, I'm sure that Ms. Allender will be able to…"
"I'm don't care what Allender can do!" The captain yelled. "Look, it was your job to fix it, Rimmer! You can't do sloppy work on the drive plate!"
"I know, sir, and I accept full responsibility for any consequences."
Then there was an explosion. A huge, rushing, gushing kind of explosion. Alarms sounded. Screens flashed, "Emergency", and Holly started to call out, "Emergency! Emergency! There's an emergency going on. Would Arnold Rimmer please hurry to white corridor 1-5-9." The crew started to convulse and squirm as the radiation coarsed through their bodies. Their faces withered. Their hair was the first thing to disintegrate. After a while longer, the bodies followed suit. Soon everyone had been diminished to a pile of white powder. The force of the blast had knocked some people onto the consoles, so some of the piles were up off the floor. Others were on the chairs, including Kochanski. All in all, it was finished in less than a minute. In less than a minute, the entire crew, all 1169 crew members were dead, except for Dave Lister, who was in stasis. And there was also one observer.
George McIntyre stood next to Kochanski's chair. He'd just seen her die. He'd just seen the captain die, and Todhunter, and Rimmer. He was shocked. "Holly!" he croaked out. "Holly! What happened?"
"The drive plate blew, George," he said. "I sealed the engine room as fast as I could, but the radiation leaked out anyway."
"This is awful," George said. "Check internal sensors. Did anyone survive?"
"I'm afraid not, George."
George was taken aback. Everyone he knew in the crew, gone. Just like that. He collapsed into one of the chairs. He felt as if he were going to be sick. If it were possible for a hologram to be ill, he probably would have been. He sat there for a long time. He didn't know how long. Finally, he heard Holly calling him.
"George? George, I need your help."
George swallowed. "Uh, yes? Yes, Holly?"
"We're a threat to the solar system if we continue on this route," Holly said. "We better plot a new course, take Red Dwarf out of the Solar System."
"Right, right," George said. He punched the data into his console. But his mind wasn't in it. He just kept thinking about the crew. "Holly, we'd better send a distress call," he said, "let the families know everyone's gone. Then I guess we ought to shut down. No point keeping the ship running if the crew's gone."
"Actually, George, there is one left after all," Holly said.