No one could ever replace my mom. She was the one woman that kept me strong.

She was a doctor, and saved so many peoples lives. It was a tragedy that she died. Living in New York City was always dangerous.

Drive by shootings killed so many people, and unfortunately, my mom was another statistic.

My parents were perfect, but they always got so much criticism. My mom was Japanese, and my dad was Caucasian. My exotic look confused many people, and I was okay with that.

I wondered if my life could ever be normal after my mom's death. Now I had no other excuse for my exotic look.

Plus my dad finally got over her death.

And he got remarried.

The woman's name was Kelly Ateara, and she lived in Washington.

I didn't know why she and her two kids didn't move to New York instead of me and my dad moving down to La Push.

Maybe my dad just wanted to get out of that town.

I did too, but I didn't want to leave my friends. My friends were everything to me, and they were the reason I was alive.

So leaving for me was a win-loose situation. I got out of that death whole, but I left everything behind. My friends, my other family, and my boyfriend of two years.

How was I supposed deal with that? They were the only things I needed.

I would have to start all over, with the ridicule and the pain, but my dad said it was good for me to start over.

Maybe it was.

And maybe it was what I needed.

I needed to start over.