Even just for a day, I want him to be mine.
It was always like that. He would be surrounded by his friends and be whisked away by his girlfriend. He was never left alone. You would always see him smiling that sun-kissed smile of his, and never once it left his face. And if it did, the emotion presented on it would be too cute to resist. If you talk to him, he would not look at anyone else. As if his world solely revolves around you. And his little compliments would always make your heart do a somersault. Believe me, because it just did.
I sent a group message to my class. I was not branded a nerd even if I am an honor student; I was just a timid one. Yeah, that is what everyone practically thinks over me. The one I sent is a joke, and fortunately I have his number. Which he only gives to his friends and classmates, which means I am either of the one. It was Christmas Eve at that time; I was busy laughing with my mother and brother when my cell phone beeped. Curiously I opened a message and I just got the shock of my life. He sent me a group message to, saying he very much enjoyed my joke and he constantly reads it. Santa just gave me the best Christmas gift ever.
Oh! But that dreadful thing happened. His ex-girlfriend, a beautiful girl from another section broke up with her current boyfriend and went back in pursuing him. And he loves her very much after all these years. I feel sorry for the ex-boyfriend, he is my friend too and we get along very well. When I heard about the news, I put my best poker face on and smiled sweetly at the newest couple, nope, the newly rejoiced couple. Congratulating them both while mourning my heart's misery.
He still talks to me; after all we are in the same group. He will talk to me in times when he badly needed a help or when practicing our presentation in English. I am one of the leaders of the play that we will present to the school and he is part of the committee. But still the moment his eyes gaze to mine, I would quickly draw my gaze away from him and answer him by, carefully not looking at his intimidating gaze. God help me, the mere thought of him near me drives me crazy enough. But no, I had to wake up at this bittersweet dream because I know that he would never ever be mine.
I just had to accept that. But that is the most hardest decision I had ever made.