You all hate me now, I just know it. But I'm sorry, I know this is probably the third time I've posted this one, but I seriously cant leave it the way it is, I NEEDED to edit this fic because it's always been a the edge of my mind screaming at me to hurry up and fix it up before I embarrass myself even more by letting it float around like I have.
FEAR NOT! I still am working on my other stories and I have a few updates in store so please put down the pitch forks and fire.
Disclaimer: If I owned the Naruto series I would probably have ran it into the ground with my over active perverted imagination. Let's just leave it at that.
/././
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I sat motionless and stared at the clock hanging innocently on the wall above the door as time went by singing the same irritating song. I remained indifferent as it went-
Tick, tick
-and tried to imagine that every sound the hand of the clock made was your heart beating in a steady pace. I sit upright in my bed with a glass of cool water in my motionless hands. The room was cold and the sheets where crisp and smelt of medicine and bleach. You sit beside me and lay with your head upon my knee; your black hair splayed across my lap as your nonexistent tears burn my knee.
-tick, tick
A hot flash of anger hits me. It clawed its way into my mind and boiled me alive from the inside and suddenly; I can't even stand you. I want to hurt you as you have hurt me. The water in the glass shook like my hands did. The glass was cool against my rapidly heating body. But you didn't notice did you? You never did, not when it has nothing to do with you.
-tick, tick.
Why the hell are you so calm? You heart goes tick, tick. It's not a fast and rapid beat like that of a distressed and sad person (which is what you are pretending to be right now). You, you're truly not human aren't you? If it doesn't benefit you, you don't even care if the world around you falls apart into a million pieces.
-Tick, tick.
Why do you look so surprised? All I did was throw my cup at the wall. Don't the glass shards look so pretty all over the floor? I think they do, look at how they sparkle in the blinding light of the hospital. Isn't it just marvelous?
Perhaps you're surprised because of the scream that pierced its way out of my raw throat? Or maybe it's because I'm flailing around scratching and clawing at anyone that came near?
Or perhaps is it because I jumped off the bed screaming till my face turned a cherry red and my throat is as raw as ever?
Tell me, tell me, what's the reason?
-Tick, tick.
You've hurt me.
You turn your panicked eyes upon mine. You're speaking, saying something. But I don't want to hear it.
(For the first time, I really couldn't give a shit about what the hell you wanted to say)
For years all you have ever said has only served to hurt me; all you've ever done was hurt me.
And now?
You've destroyed me.
You cry out my name in desperation, but wait.
Shouldn't I be the one screaming for you?
I take a step back and you follow.
Shouldn't I be doing that?
Shouldn't I be the one following you?
You reach your hand out to me.
Isn't that my job?
-Tick, tick
My anger grows and the white door is slammed open. I have to time to react as I'm tackled down.
-Tick, tick
Nurses are trying to hold me down as you stay back and watch in pain.
You fucker.
It's me that's in pain. I'm the one suffering from the pain that you've caused. The scars on my wrist were no accident. And I'm happy that every time you look at them you fucking know.
-Tick, tick.
It's driving me fucking crazy!
You're driving me crazy! You were always a master at masks; you can hide anything with those fuckers. This is one of them isn't it? You pretend to be scared, hurt, worried, but there's one thing that you can't hide from me.
-Tick, tick.
Your heart sings a steady song while mine slams against my bones!
But yours. Yours barely even beats.
-Tick, tick.
There's a flurry of colors now. I see yellow and amber first; then the face of a woman with a diamond on her forehead. There's a sharp pain and my vision swims.
After that I see pink and green. But then it always has to return to that.
Black, black, black.
Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick
You've killed me
/./.
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Updates will come faster as I continue to work on editing. This would be so much easier if I had a beta TT^TT