Hank and Dale were drinking beer in the alley. Dale was talking about how beer was the byproduct of the acid excreted from the aliens that impregnated Nancy. Hank finally got tired of Dale dissing beer, and with a "shut up" threw his half full can of beer at Dale's face, knocking him out.
"That's what you get for dissing beer, I tell ya hwat" Hank smirked, picking back up the beer and drinking it. As Hank enjoyed his beer, Boomhauer ran down the alley, screaming.
"Yo yo yo Hank man I tell you that dang ol Bill man ehbfkebkeb he's making some damn dang ol noise talkin bout that dang ol bkbkccjdbkccdjlcdkd man he gonna kill himself!"
"BWAAAAAAH" Hank yelled as he ran down the alley to Bill's house. He kicked the door open and there lay Bill, whimpering. He had a knife up to his neck.
"Damn it, Bill!" Hank yelled, kicking the knife out of his hand. Bill scrambled for the knife but Hank jumped on top of him.
"PROTECT THE QUARTERBAAAAACK!" Bill yelled, punching Hank in the face and breaking his nose.
"BWAAAAH!" Hank yelled, clutching his nose as Bill reached the knife and stuck it halfway into his own gut. Hank leaped at Bill and pulled the knife out before he could push it any further. Luckily Bill was a fatass so it didn't do much harm.
Bill screamed like a drunken idiot as he attempted to pin Hank to the ground. Hank, using the knife handle, smacked Bill in the face.
Suddenly, Bill began to whimper.
"Oh gawd" Hank muttered. "Bill I'm sorry. Don't cry." But Bill continued to whimper.
"I said don't cry!" Hank began to tickle Bill. Bill started laughing uncontrollably like a toddler.
"Is somebody ticklish?" Hank said in a baby voice. Bill was laughing so loud the neighborhod could hear. He started flailing around and tears were coming out of his eyes.
Suddenly he let out a loud, squishy fart that lasted 30 seconds. Hank immediately stopped tickling him and jumped up.
"Mother of God, that was a toilet sound!"
Bill put his head down and started to whimper again. He had shit himself.
"Fuck this" Hank said, walking out of the house.
THE END