"Oh, Will! Thank you so much for taking her in! I honestly cannot thank you-" My mother's soft voice was cut off by her tears. I would be staying here in Lima for a couple months, praying to God the cancer did not come back. This was a touchy spot for my mother: leave me back in Jersey, with no state of the line Cancer Treatment Center ten minutes away; or move me here, away from my family while they get everything in order there.
Yeah, that's code for both of my parents getting second and third jobs to pay off the bills on our decrepit house. I swore that thing was killing me in the first place.
My mother put her hand on the side of my thin face, stroking my cheek with her thumb. I surprised myself when I felt tears prickling the back of my eyes. I found that I couldn't meet her eyes anymore.
"You'll miss your flight, mom." I said to my uncle's wooden floor. I saw my mom shuffle her feet, her hand still on the side of my face.
"You have her medications, right?" My mother stalled; uncle Will was considered the responsible sibling. My eyes still on the floor, I heard uncle Will come by my side and place a trustworthy hand on my back.
"Yes, Kathy. You know that she is safe here. She'll start school in a couple of days, and I promise you that even one trace of fatigue or sickness and she'll be in that hospital before she even blinks." I heard the smile in his voice, the joking banter, but coming from him it seemed wrong. Like it was coming from the wrong kind of person.
I heard my mother sigh, almost in relief. Her breath blew the flyaway hairs framing my face. "Oh Will," my mother's hand fell from my face as she wrapped her arms around her brother. Uncle Will returned it, not knowing that my father got these types of hugs for the last four years. The Relief hugs.
"It's not like it's forever, Kath," Uncle Will whispered, "Only for a few months. She'll love it here," he smiled at me from behind my mother, and I could only return it half-heartedly. I looked around the apartment he shared with his wife, Terry. I had never met her before, so I had no idea what to expect. But from the looks of the cheery yellow kitchen and hallway walls, I was not going to like it here.
"Okay," my mother's shaky whisper floated to me, and she looked at me again, definite tears in her eyes. My heart broke in some small way whenever I saw her like this.
"Mommy," I barely whispered as I threw myself into her arms. A tear slipped down my cheek and I quickly wiped it away with my fingertips. Her strong arms wrapped around me, almost crushing me to her chest. "I'll be okay." My voice was shaky, and I got pissed at myself. If I start crying, she'd never go back.
"I love you so much, Hales," she said to me, stroking my hair like she would in the hospitals whenever we were both scared. My fingers automatically traced the bumpy scar on my side; my body shivering only slightly now. "And I'll call a lot, I promise." She let me go, and I plastered on a smile for her benefit. Her eyes were filled with concern, but she returned a fake smile. We both took deep breaths.
"Well," my mother breathed, "I guess you're all set here." With one last hug to the both of us, she walked through the door. For a moment I just stood there, staring at my uncle's closed door, numb. I couldn't cry; my tear ducts wouldn't produce any more moisture. I jumped a bit when my phone vibrated in my jeans pocket; I had a new text message.
I will always love you, my little Hales-Bales. Love, Mom.
I smiled, and somehow I knew she would be okay.
"Well then Hales," I looked at my uncle, who had his arms open wide, "anything that you want to do-?"
"Uncle Will!" I jumped into his arms, placing a big kiss on his cheek. He laughed, and twirled me around in his arms like he used to when I was little. I was just a little shorter than him, but probably would be taller than him in the next month or so. I hope.
"So how's the school? And you're married?" I laughed, for what felt like the first time in a long time, "I'm sorry I missed the wedding." My voice grew quiet on the last part, looking at the floor again, putting my hands in the back of my jeans pockets.
"Haley, no worries," uncle Will said reassuringly, putting a hand on my shoulder, "Terry gets back from work soon, so you can meet her then." He gave me a funny smile, and I chuckled a bit. He laughed with me, and it made me remember how we used to be pretty close before I got sick. I hugged him again, catching him off guard and he stumbled back a little.
"I missed you, uncle Will." I said into his shoulder. He hugged me back softly.
"I missed you too, Haley." He backed away a little so he could get a good look at me. "Geez, you've grown up so much! How old are you now, thirty?" He chuckled. I punched his arm playfully.
"No! For your information I just turned seventeen!" I laughed with him, and the moment would have gone on longer if the door right next to us hadn't busted open, scaring the crap out of me and revealing a slender, kind of pretty woman holding two bags of what I guessed were groceries. Her small blue eyes were round in my direction.
"Hi…Will. Who's…" she looked me up and down in a way that made me angry. It was like I was in school again, getting sized up by a popular girl. "This?" She finished with a superior cheerful tone, and I looked to uncle Will for confirmation that this woman was not his wife.
"Oh, hey…Terry I didn't think you would be home until later," he moved past me and pecked her on the cheek. Apparently she wasn't satisfied with his attention toward me at the moment because when he moved by my side again, I saw a glimmer of annoyance and…jealousy?…cross her face.
"Terry, this is my niece Haley. Haley, this is Terry, my wife." So I was raised right, and I know how to set aside bad first impressions and give people the benefit of the doubt. So I stuck out my hand and put on a smile.
"Hey Terry!" I said cheerfully, matching my smile that was just oozing happiness. "I'm Haley and I just can't wait to get to know another aunt! I'm sure we'll just be great friends!" I'm pretty sure my uncle caught on to my tone, because he poked my side softly. Not meeting his eye, I waited for Terry to respond.
"Oh…well, hello…Haley." she said carefully, but I took it as condescending. I bit my tongue, knowing that if it wasn't anyone but uncle Will's wife, I would not be as nice*. So I tried a different approach.
"Oh, let me help you with those," I said nicely, reaching to grab the heavy looking bags out of her slender arms. But she just freaked out and backed far away toward the kitchen.
"Oh no! Your cancer probably doesn't permit you to carry heavy objects. Because of your cancer, dear, you will not have to lift a finger! You will have fun here and will totally forget that you suffered in a hospital for six years because of your…cancer." She placed, well more like dropped, the groceries on the granite kitchen counter, and threw a pitiful glance my way.
"Just make yourself at home, honey, and I promise we will do everything to help you forget about your," she leaned towards me, "cancer." She whispered for some dramatic affect.
Well. What a woman.
"Okay! Now that we are all here, why don't I start dinner! Won't that be just fantastic!" She beamed at Will, and then began banging open cabinets; basically making a show out of making dinner. It didn't take a scientist to realize that she has never done this before in her life. My uncle and I locked eyes, and his look was just as confused as mine.
"Uh…Terry, what are you doing?" uncle Will had stepped closer, while she was busy playing with a big cooking pot.
"Will, I'm you wife. And wives are supposed to make the dinner when their husbands are out all day at work and so tired when they get home." She actually put her hand on the side of his face, like she was trying to seduce him right in front of a seventeen-year-old girl. God, this was sickening.
"Uh…I'm just…gonna go up to my room now," I said, backing up toward the stairs. Uncle Will turned out of his wife's grasp and went to lead me up them, but I stopped him. "Uh, no! That's okay. I'm gonna guess…second door on the left, across from the bathroom?" I smiled at him, remembering when I was younger and would used to spend weekends with him in that room. His face lit up, remembering.
"You remember," he returned my smile and went to hand me my duffle bag.
"Of course. Just holler when uh…dinner is ready." I smirked at him, and he ruffled my hair.
"I can't wait for you to check out part two of my birthday gift! It's on your bed." He smiled proudly. I put a hand on his arm.
"Uncle Will, you didn't…" I trailed off.
"Shh! Trust me, you will love it," he grabbed me in a tiny hug, "I'm so glad you're here, Haley." he whispered into my hair.
"Me too," I said to him. And I meant it.
I pulled out of the hug, laughed once again at Terry's horrible attempt at making dinner, and started toward the stairs of the apartment. The metal spiral staircase was something I always envied as a kid, and I hadn't realize I still did. My foot had just touched the first stair when the pain flashed up my side, making me grip the handle quickly with both hands. I shut my eyes tight, breathing deeply.
It's okay, it's okay, you're okay…I repeated in my head. And just like before, the pain vanished just as soon as it had come, but not before scaring myself into think that I was still in the hospital, still attached to machines that both kept me alive and administered the doses of radiation that made me want to die…
I pulled myself out of the memory and took a shaky breath. Still gripping the cold railing, I ascended the stairs I had taken before as a child. I couldn't help but smile at the memory of the Schuester family reunion, the songs me and him sang together. Twist and Shout has never been the same again.
Smiling as I opened the door to the still small room with a queen sized bed, a dresser, walk in closet and purple walls, I noticed right away what my uncle's surprise was. A black case was atop my pale purple comforter, an envelope on top.
My duffle bag dropped at my feet on the white shag carpet on its own accord as I went to sit on my bed. Taking the envelope off for the moment, I placed my hand on the familiar, worn leather of the case. Memories of my uncle playing songs for me ran rampant through my mind; that was one of the more happier times in my life. A time when my mother would sing and laugh and actually cheer when she was relieved; not this soft, quiet woman who squirmed at the thought of life's obstacles. I barely knew that woman.
Lifting the locks slowly with my fingertips, I opened the case and gawked at the sheer beauty of that acoustic guitar. I closed my eyes, a smile on my face as I breathed deeply. I lifted the guitar onto my lap, and began to tune it like my uncle had showed me when I was young. My best friend, Taylor, had one like this, and she would bring it to the hospital almost every day, and leave it there at night so I wouldn't go insane.
There was a bubble that I entered every time I played; one where no harm, injury or pain could enter. I held onto that bubble for dear life. And here, I felt like I wouldn't have to. I hoped.
Once the guitar was tuned, I went on a whim and began to play one of my favorites, The Blower's Daughter by Damien Rice.
And so it isJust like you said it would beLife goes easy on meMost of the timeAnd so it isThe shorter storyNo love, no gloryNo hero in her skies
I can't take my eyes off youI can't take my eyes off youI can't take my eyes off youI can't take my eyes off youI can't take my eyes off youI can't take my eyes...And so it isJust like you said it should beWe'll both forget the breezeMost of the timeAnd so it isThe colder waterThe blower's daughterThe pupil in denialI can't take my eyes off youI can't take my eyes off youI can't take my eyes off youI can't take my eyes off youI can't take my eyes off youI can't take my eyes...Did I say that I loathe you?Did I say that I want toLeave it all behind?I can't take my mind off youI can't take my mind off you...I can't take my mind off youI can't take my mind off youI can't take my mind off youI can't take my mind...My mind...my mind...'Till I find somebody new
I smiled. I couldn't remember the last time I sang, like actually sang. I would usually hum and strum senseless chords late at night, but I didn't have the guts to sing out loud for fear the nurses would hear me. A small laugh escaped me as I fingered more notes on the instrument, feeling the familiar strings molded for my fingers. I looked over when I felt the bed vibrate from my phone; I had a text from an unknown number.
Puzzled, I flipped open the phone.
That was beautiful, Hales. I literally have chillllls. Open the envelope! -Uncle Will
"Uncle Will!" I breathed. "Why do you have to be SUCH A CREEP!" I laughed loud enough for him to hear me. Playing the part, I lifted the envelope dramatically. "Oh, what could this envelope behold?" Gently tearing away the seal, it opened to reveal a purple tie-dye looking card. I opened the card to reveal two bland looking tickets of some sort, and a note I recognized being in my uncle's tiny scrawl.
For old time's sake? J Love, Uncle Will and Terry
I stared at the tickets, holding the two in my fingers. They read 'William McKinley Rangers vs. Timber Falls Wolves. Date: Sept. 7th Time: 8 P.M.' Unconsciously glancing at the clock on my night stand, I read it was 7:13. A smile crept onto my face as I placed my guitar back into it's case and looked at myself in the mirror.
"Hmm. Would I wear this to a game?" I asked myself, fingering an old tournament t-shirt and my black jeans and cool sandals. I nodded to myself. "Eh, what the hell." My smile grew as I practically skipped down the stairs, and almost knocking straight into Terry as I swung the last banister! Terry screamed, and luckily I dug my heals into the carpet quick, gripping the hand-rail extra tight to stop my momentum.
"Oh. Uh, hey there, Terry." I breathed, straightening up as she readjusted the strap of her purse. I heard uncle Will clamber over to us, clearly frazzled.
"What happened? Haley you okay?" he sounded out of breath as well, but there was something about Terry that was distracting me at the moment.
"Yeah, uncle Will, I'm fine-" I started, my eyes on my uncle's wife's stomach.
"She was swinging from the banister, Will! Thank God she didn't run into your pregnant wife." She flashed my uncle a pair of doe eyes, but his attention was directed at me, I guess gauging my reaction.
"I knew there was something I didn't notice before," I said, really selling it, "Why didn't you tell me? Oh, I just adore babies and Terry you're absolutely…" I bit my tongue for what I wanted to say, "…Glowing." I finished with a plastered beam toward her. My attention turned to uncle Will, who was beaming as well, and I gave him a real smile.
"Well I guess hugs are in order for the dad!" I threw my arms around his neck and he hugged me back tightly, laughing with me. I had one arm around my uncle's waist when I sent a cautionary glance toward Terry's stomach. I really didn't want to believe that her shirt looked like Taylor's when we were partnered in Life Skills class and she had to wear that heavy padded stomach under her shirt for forty minutes a day.
I really didn't want to believe that.
"So did you open up that envelope, kiddo?" My uncle brought me back to earth again, and suddenly that whole pregnant thing could wait. I turned up to my uncle and beamed.
"Yes! Game on! Can we leave now?" I said, practically jumping up and down in excitement. This would be the first football game I would attend in five years. Yeah, I was pretty stoked.
"Honey, you're going to Karen's right?" Uncle Will threw a smile her way, his arm going around my shoulders. Terry looked a little taken aback.
"Um, yes Will. I won't be back until late, so you guys just go have fun!" she said in a tight tone at the end, but I got the gist and was tugging at uncle Will's arm toward the door.
"Can we go now? Please, please, please!" I said, my eyes alight with excitement. Uncle Will just laughed down at me.
"Okay, okay! But I may need this arm in the near future so can you take your nails out of it?" He sneered jokingly down at me. I let go of his arm and examined a hand, puzzled.
"I have nails? By George, am I actually tuning into a…girl?" I over dramatized, placing the back of my other hand on my forehead and looking away from my outstretched fingers in shame.
"By George what will we do!" Uncle Will returned in a funny British accent that made me laugh. I dropped my hands, and he clapped me on the shoulder, lifting my chin up with his other hand. "You were always the athlete, you know. Miss Anything-Pink-Must-Go." He chuckled down to me.
"Oh let's just go, please!" I looked at my watch. "It's already…7:22 and the game starts at 8! Now let's get a move on, William!" I smacked his chest playfully and turned toward the door, grabbing my black North Face sweater. I heard my uncle chuckle and grab his coat and his keys and follow me out the door.