Looking back on it now, it's as if a light bulb flicked on in my brain.

I could see it. I could see everything.

I could see the mess I had unknowingly stumbled into and I could see how my actions had made everything worse.

I didn't want to be in this dark place anymore.

I wanted to turn time back 12 months and be happy.

I wanted to be able to smile again.

But that was just wishful thinking.

There is no escaping this- I was in hell and I was here to stay.