fandom: Final Fantasy VIII
title: Perfect Balance
genre: General
rating: G
pairing: None, just Squall musing about Seifer and Rinoa. And no, fuckfaces, it's not a damn love triangle. Dream on.
summary: Squall's never been one to let things upset him much, and Seifer and Rinoa being back together is no exception. (premiered 10/14/05 at 607am.)
At first it bothered me.
It was my rival and someone I'd thought I was in love with. Most anyone would be upset if the same happened to them. I knew the two of them had a past together, and that didn't really get to me; I'd accepted it, moved on, it couldn't be changed.
...Then he came back and they picked up where they left off.
But the more I thought about it, the better I felt about it. Seifer and I have two different... destinies (I hate that word, it's too cliché. Like it or not, he's part of mine and I'm part of his. Rinoa fell in between us — the median. And it was for the best, because without her, surely neither of us would have had this revelation that we're not supposed to be rivals — we're supposed to be like brothers.
(That's part of the reason them being together no longer bothers me.)
Seifer was meant to be a knight, while I wasn't. I just played a part I thought was right. For him, it wasn't just a "dream" he had; it was something that was supposed to happen. Ultimecia was a corrupted path, a sort of test for him. Rinoa's the sorceress he's supposed to be the knight to. I was never meant to be her knight. Fate brought them back together for that very reason. She was only brought to me so I could realize this all.
... To be honest, I was never in love with her. I risked my life time and time again to save her because somewhere deep in my mind I knew I had to, that I'd be failing somebody, somewhere if I didn't. I won't deny that it's also because I wanted to, but mostly it was because I felt I had to. So I was confused by it all... thought it was love. I kissed her and realized it wasn't right, but we went on for some time trying to convince ourselves that it was and maybe trying to keep everyone else happy. But we were tired of living the lie and we parted — of course, though, we stayed friends.
So these days, when I see them together, I have to smile to myself (even just the slightest), because they're what was meant to be. Sometimes I think that Rinoa wasn't the median between Seifer and me — I was the one between them. But when it comes down to it, no one's a median. Without each other, the three of us would be lost. Seifer and I are brothers, Rinoa and I are best friends, Seifer and Rinoa are soulmates.
It's a perfect balance, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
AN: I'm currently in the process of moving several of my stories from my personal writing journal on LiveJournal (607am) to here. I'm keeping them at the aforementioned journal, though ... just putting them on here as well. :)