Shinobi

Disclaimer: This is a non-profit fan based parody Naruto, Naruto Shippuden and Boruto belong to Shonen Jump, VIZ Media, FUNIMATION and, Masashi Kishimoto

Chapter 1: Enter, Naruto Uzumaki!

Many Years Ago, a monsterous beast attacked Konohagakure no Sato. This beast was called the Kyuubi no Kitsune, Strongest of the nine Bijuu, which left death and destruction in it's wake. All hope was lost until the Fifth Hokage, Minato Namikaze, defeated the Biju by sealing it into a newborn child...

Enter, Naruto Uzumaki!

Konoha is a rather beautiful and peaceful village where hardly anything goes wrong. The villagers would go about their daily lives, chatting and socializing with friends, buying and selling wares for their livelihood and spending quality time with their respective families. Children would run around rampant and having fun, most working hard in school while the extremly rare delinquent slacks off, or eating delicious treats and talk among friends. Most of the girls talk about a certain raven haired prodigy. Shinobi and Konoichi Doing their daily missions, training, mourning for a lost comrade like a silver haired jonin does everyday or teaching young, aspiring ninjas to be the best they can be. Even the Hokage, their leader, lives a humble life of managing the village and ensuring everyone is happy, even if paperworks a bitch. All in all, Konohagakure can be a peaceful utopia that all would want to live in. Especially considering what happened twelve years prior.

Unfortunately, this was not one of those times...

The people of the village expected to wake up and go about their lives normally only to look in shock at the Hokage monument, the faces of the five hokage that was carved on the cliff hanging over the village, and were mortified at what happened to it.

The faces had graffiti on it.

The First Hokage, Hashirama Senju, face had been turned into a derp face with the kanji for 'dunce' on his forehead

The Second Hokage, Madara Uchiha, Had the the kanji for 'TEME' written all over it.

The Third Hokage, Tobirama Senju, had orange swirls on his cheeks along with looking bruised with the most ovious feature being a black eye.

The Fourth Hokage, Hiruzen Sarutobi, and Fifth Hokage, Minato Namikaze, were left untouched.

There was only one person in the village who would do this...

"UZUMAKI NARUTOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

The villagers screaming bloody murder for a certain blonde woke more villagers which allowed for more screams of bloody murder. The Fourth Hokage woke up and looked through his bedroom window to see what had happened to the monument. He couldn't help but wonder how this had happened without ANBU knowledge of any sort. Of course he knew who did this if the villagers' cry for bloody murder was anything to go by. Hell, he could even see the young blonde running at Mid Jonin speed away from some Elite Chunin. How a child ran at that speed would be incredible to the villgers but considering it was the 'The Demon Brat' they figured it was some demonic magic of some sorts. The Shinobi Genin to Chunin thought the Kyuubi somehow managed to use it's chakra to power the boys movements. The Jonin and above with the few sensors in the village knew, however, th boy was just that fast. This, tied with his ungodly levels of stealth and excellent trap making abilites, would make him one of the best Assassin, spy, information gathering or infiltration nin if taught properly. Although, the chunin had finally counered him only for him to turn into a puff of smoke. This is his trademark jutsu, the shadow clone jutsu, another testement to his skills along with helping him develope a tracking and searching missions. Creating one shadowclone could kill most ninja but Naruto could create one hundred easily. This meant he had chakra levels on par with Gods of Shinobi. That corner took the ninja one hour to produce and it was all for nothing. His evasive tactics, another testement to his skills, was something chunin hated. Naruto is basically a Chunin Tora.

On the bright side, this caused ninja in Konoha to be faster than other hidden villages, capture missions seem to be a peice of cake, detection skills have improved emmensly and they even used some of Naruto's old tricks improving these skills as well. Although, this prank was a little bit out of there as th villagers did nothing particularly cruel to the Jinchuriki. Only those that understand Naruto's dream knew why he did this. He was making a statement that he would surpass the previous hokage and make them a joke compared to him. Though no one had any idea where Naruto was. Those chasing a Naruto didn't even know if it was the real one or not. The real Demon Container, however, was none of them.

"Seriously Naruto-Kun, how did you do it?" Sakura aked. She was well aware of the blonde's antics and found them funny.

"Trade secret," Naruto said, "Though for someone as beautiful as you..."

"Naruto-Kuuuuuun!" Hinata, Naruto's admirer screamed, "How'd you do that without getting caught"

"Ah, hi Hinata-Chan," Naruto said nervously. He knew Hinata liked him, she knew he did too, and did not know how to respond to it. He already liked Sakura after all. Sakura herself had a similar problem as she liked both Sasuke Uchiha, the progidy of this year and last Uchiha, and Naruto. she liked Sasuke for the sam reason like the rest of the girls and he was the one to ultimatly get them to stop picking on her slightly larger forehead while Naruto was the only one to really admire her and constantly tried to stop people from picking on her plus, he encouraged her to finally take medical ninjutsu classes at the hospital. It was a good thing too, since she's a prodigy at that field.

The three were currently in their Acadamy classroom. Naruto is a 4"8' boy with a muscular build, Blonde spikey hair and eletric blue eyes, and three whisker marks on each cheek. He was wearing a black leather jacket with the Uzumaki Swirl on it's back and an orange tee underneath. He also wore standard shinobi pants and sandals.

Sakura Haruno stands 4"10' with an olympian build, long cherry blossom hair and emerald green eyes with a marginally larger forehead. She wore a red dress with white lining and a white circle at the back and tight shorts underneath, and she also weard a red ribbon in her hair to expose her forehead. She is the best Konoichi in the acadamy with medical talents on par or exceeding Tsunade of the Sannin.

Hinata Hyuuga stands 4"7' with a petit build, long navy blue hair and an almost white grey eyes. She wore a snow white fur hoodie with bunny ears on the hood and wore standard shinobi pants and sandals. The talented Hyuuga heiress who doesn't hold back at anything, with some Talk no Jutsu from Naruto Uzumaki. Second only to Sakura in academics.

The only other persons of notice are: Shikamaru Nara, Kiba Inuzuka and his nin-ken Akamaru, Choji Akamichi, Shino Abruame, Ino Yamanaka, and of course saving the best for last, The residential heartthrob for girls who are not Hyuuga or blind, Angsty Avenger, Top Rookie Badass, the last Uchiha himself: Sasuke Uchiha.

(Descriptionforeveryonebutsasukeuchiha'causetheydon'tchangeskip no Jutsu!)

And finally, Sasuke Uchiha. He had hair aken to a Shadow's spikes but no red and dreamy muscle boy build that no girl can resist (Duck But hair, muscle build for those of you who don't understand, my friend, huge sasugay fangirl, is writing Sasugay's discription cause I used the word hoe too much e.g. Hoe girl maggotnet, hoe duck but's hair, hoe's face, is a complete hoe... you get the idea...), Dreamy red eyes with three tomme in them meaning he unlocked his clan's legendary sharingan that you could lose yourself in (The Legendary undisputed Sharingan which is the only redeemable quality of that Hoe's feature... Why is this prick a fucking Uchiha?). He wears a Black tee shirt with a collar reaching his chin's height and an Uchiha fan symbol on his back, standard shinobi pants and sandals but black. The greatest thing to walk the earth and his totally the protagonist of this universe as he is the alpha and Optimus Maximum {A dick eater that can go die in a ditch and is soooo not the protagonist and is overrated as fuck!)[Top of his class in all fields -Voice of Reason].

"Okay class it's time for the Genin Test," Iruka said and the class immediatly got ready, "But first, can the following persons, who already got their rank, come up"

{Description Skip no Jutsu!)

"Sakura Haruno, Sasuke Uchiha and Naruto Uzumaki"

Said person came and accepted the headband that were given

"Who are also Known as Team 7"

THs got many reactions. Sakura squealed at being in the same team as Sasuke and Naruto. Naruto fist bumpped in victory at being in he same team as Sakura. Sasuke smirked as this was the best team he could think of getting. The class, however, had a different reaction.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

The accumilated Decibels destroyed all glasses in the village, no joke, and lasted EIGHT MINUTES until it stopped. The villagers sure they were being attacked and the Hokage...

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

The laugh lasted a solid minute but not soft enough for the acadamy students to hear... Pitchforkes and Torches will surround the Kage Tower later... Iruka had earmuffs with anti sound seals prepared for this and muffed the male populace of the classroom and Sakura from the dream destroyed screeches before it happened thanks to the help of their future Sensai, Who poofed out of nowhere seemingly.

"Hello, I'm team 7's sensai." The Jonin said. He had on standard shinobi Jonin armour and mask covering his everything below the eyes, gravity defying silver hair, one onyx eye while the other had a scar on it but it was red with tree tomme, The Sharingan. Shikamaru Nara spoke up on this.

"So you pin our three most powerful Genin with Kakashi Hatake, the best available Jonin in the village," He deduced. Kakashi simply eye smiled and nodded.

All other non genin deduced life was very unfair.
A/N: Phew, that was intense. This is basically what I think the universe should have been like... Yeah the changes are clear enough.

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