Sooooo if Glee is off the air, do I have to keep being depressed that I own nothing?
Seasons of Love
by-andthenIfound5dollars
Warnings: Canon Divergence, Surrogacy, Kid/Fic, Future/Fic, Miscarriage, Childbirth
A/N: Here it is! The first chapter in part 2 of my Family Verse. Thank you so much for all the comments and love everyone left on part 1, Dancing Through Life. It really was the driving force to make me finish part 2 and begin posting. Before we get started I did want to say-I added the canon divergence tag because obviously we shift from how the show tells us our boys' futures are headed. I love the way the show ended, but this story has been in my head for so long and I've fallen so in love with Mel...so while it's not exactly AU, we do diverge from canon. Also, heed the warnings. The road to their second baby is not always an easy one, so message me if you are uncomfortable and we can talk it out or I'll tell you where you can pick the story back up.
The transition from having a toddler to a pre-schooler seemed much easier than either Kurt or Blaine had expected, and it seemed to happen overnight. Although potty training was hard and disgusting at times -although really Blaine, it has to be better than changing diapers 5-7 times a day--they both felt like they woke up one day and Sophie was sleeping the entire night in her toddler bed, talking in full sentences and the search for the perfect preschool began.
It was hard and taxing time for all of them that required a lot of hard work, balance, and compromise-but hindsight is often 20/20 and through the eyes of a parent, the time flew. Sophie was a thriving little girl. She had opinions and likes and dislikes just like any other child. She was stubborn like her Papa, kind like her Daddy, and always had one hand in an art project like her Aunt Mel, whom she was extremely close to. All three of them agreed that she was the best parts of all three of them.
"Papa, I have to go potty!" Sophie called on a Saturday morning in June as Kurt leaned down in the hallway packing her bag.
He looked up with a sigh. "Blaine!" he called. "Can you help Sophie? My hands are kinda full."
Blaine walked in from the kitchen, handing Kurt two full sippy cups to pack.
"Yeah. Come on, baby," Blaine called, holding out his hand for Sophie. "We have to be quick though, okay…cause we need to meet Aunt Mel in twenty minutes."
"Yep," Sophie sang as she stood up from her crayons and let her dad lead her to the bathroom.
Kurt zipped up the bag and set it on the table, before squatting down to put away Sophie's sketch book and crayons and other toys strewn on the floor of the loft.
In the bathroom, Blaine helped Sophie adjust her shorts, wash her hands, then picked her up and kissed her neck.
"Daaad!" Sophie chastised as Blaine carried her into the living room.
"Mmmm, I'm hungry and my favorite meal is little girl!" Blaine nibbled on Sophie's neck as they walked into the main area of the loft and Sophie giggled helplessly.
Kurt smiled as he tossed the strap of the bag over his shoulder and grabbed her jacket in case she needed it.
"Come on, sillies," Kurt said as he tucked a lock of hair back into Sophie's bun and kissed Blaine's cheek. "We need to get moving or we're gonna be late."
xoxo
Mel smiled and thanked the hostess as she led her and her new boyfriend Luke to a table toward the back of the restaurant her and the guys had agreed on that morning. She took the menu with a quiet thank you and grinned at Luke's scrunched face.
"So…should I be worried?" he asked.
"Not at all," she assured him, shaking her head. "I just want you to meet them, no pressure."
Luke didn't look so sure.
"I feel like I'm meeting the parents for an approval," he confessed, shifting uncomfortably in his chair and tugging at the collar of his shirt.
"Well," Mel agreed, opening her menu. "Kurt and Blaine and Sophie are my family."
"Yeah…I know," Luke agreed, smoothing down his shirt.
"Oh," Mel said suddenly, sitting up when she saw Kurt, Blaine, and Sophie walking through the door of the restaurant. "Here they are."
Luke stood awkwardly as two very good looking men walked up to their table, both smiling. The shorter of the two men was holding a smiling bundle of curls.
"Hi, honey!" the taller of the two enveloped Mel in a hug.
"Hi, Kurt," she cried, happily returning the hug. "Ohh, I've missed you guys!"
"We missed you too!" Blaine agreed, holding out his arm for Mel.
"Auntie Mel!" Sophie called, clapping her hands and leaning over for Mel to take her from Blaine.
"Hi sweetie!" Mel cooed, pulling Sophie into her arms and kissing her cheek. "Oh my goodness you have gotten so big!"
"I wear big girl panties all the time now!" Sophie announced proudly. Kurt covered his face with his hand and Blaine laughed out loud.
"She's been telling everyone that lately," Blaine confessed.
"I know, honey." Mel nodded with a giggle. "You were doing that before I left, I've only been gone a month, but I'm very proud of you still."
Kurt dropped the bag onto the back of Blaine's chair with another grin. Mel kissed Sophie again as she seemed to remember to introduce her closest friends to the new man in her life.
"Oh, guys," Mel grinned, shifting Sophie on her hip. "This is Luke…my main squeeze."
Luke held his hand out, praying it wasn't as sweaty as he felt.
"And Luke, this is Kurt and Blaine." Mel introduced, pointing to the two men respectively. The three men shook hands, Kurt and Blaine both smiling warmly. "And this little pistol is Sophia," Mel patted Sophie on her tummy as Soph smiled brightly and waved.
"I've heard a lot about all three of you," Luke said, smiling at Sophie.
"Likewise," Kurt smirked. Blaine nudged him with a chuckle and they sat down.
They spent lunch laughing, Mel talking about the book tour she'd just finished, Sophie demanding her attention. Kurt was describing his new line and Blaine talked his current show, and about how it was easier for him to get into college than getting Sophie into a good preschool.
"I'm serious…I don't think either Kurt or I had as much paperwork for NYADA as we have filled out for her." Blaine groaned and Kurt nodded.
"It is unreal, we were denied twice before we found the Montessori program we've decided on," Kurt whispered, but Soph was happily distracted coloring and munching on some of the goldfish crackers Kurt had given her.
"Ouch," Mel winced, sitting back in her chair.
Luke stayed pretty quiet through lunch, content to sit and listen to his girlfriend reconnect with her friends after a month on the road. After about an hour however, Luke needed to get back to work. He gave Mel a kiss, shook Blaine and Kurt's hands again, and waved to Sophie before heading out.
"So, he's cute," Kurt grinned, stealing a snap pea from Blaine's plate.
Mel crossed her arms and leaned back in her chair as she smiled and nodded.
"How did you guys meet, again?" Blaine asked, slapping his husband's hand away from his plate.
"He's my editor Leah's brother." Mel answered, picking up one of the crayons that had rolled out of Sophie's reach. "He was visiting when we were in Pittsburgh and Leah set us up."
"Aww, how sweet," Kurt sang, picking up his water to take a sip.
"Shut up, jerk!" Mel laughed and Kurt winked.
"Seriously honey," Blaine promised, nudging Kurt again. "We're really happy for you."
"Thank you," Mel said winking at Blaine. "I'm really happy too."
Kurt, who had been leaning over Sophie to whisper if she had to go to the bathroom, straightened back up and smiled to his friend.
"That's all that matters, he seems nice," he finished as he motioned for Blaine to hand him the bag and stood to pick Sophie up. "I'm gonna take her, no gossiping til I get back!" he warned, setting Sophie on her feet and taking her hand, leading her toward the bathroom.
Mel nodded solemnly and turned to Blaine.
"I can't believe I never thought to ask this," she started, twirling the straw in her water glass. "But how do you guys deal with the whole 'bathroom in public' thing?"
Blaine looked at her blankly for a moment, before understanding washed over him and he laughed.
"Most places we go have either a family bathroom, or a one person kind of set up," he shrugged and smiled before continuing. "And if not, we just call 'Dad with his daughter?' and head into the women's bathroom. Most times it's okay."
"Most times?" Mel asked.
"Yeah, I mean sometimes we get the 'Hang on just a sec', but for the most part it really isn't an issue."
Mel nodded quietly and their conversation flowed on simply from there. Blaine started talking about his current show and how much longer his run was scheduled to be. A few minutes later, Kurt walked back to their table with a sleepy girl in his arms.
"Here baby," he cooed, passing her over into Blaine's arms with her blue alphabet blanket. "Sit with Daddy and your blanket and take a little nap while we have coffee."
Sophie nodded as she buried her cheek against Blaine's neck and held her blanket up to her chin. Blaine kissed the top of her head and rubbed her back soothingly until she started to drift off against him.
Mel looked on, a warm smile filling her face, as Kurt called the waitress over, ordered coffee for all three of them and a cheesecake sampler plate to share.
"Nap time?" she asked quietly.
Kurt looked over at Blaine's watch and shrugged.
"A little early, but we got up pretty early to go to the Green Market this morning, so she's a little tired from all the running around," he told her, looking over at Sophie and nodding to Blaine that she was out.
Blaine shifted her more comfortably against his chest and picked up his water glass to take a sip.
"So," Mel started, waggling her eyebrows just a touch at them. "Soph is gonna be three this year, have you guys thought any about that second baby?" she asked.
Kurt and Blaine looked at each other, seeming to have one of those silent conversations they were so famous for.
"We've talked about it a little," Blaine started, looking back at Mel.
"Talked about it in a positive way, or in a 'Oh god, never again.' kind of a way?" Mel asked. "Because in the beginning, you always said you, Kurt especially, didn't want her to grow up as an only child. That it was really important that she wasn't."
They were quiet again for a few moments.
"We honestly weren't sure if you would want to do it all again?" Kurt finally sighed. "We know it wasn't exactly fun for you-especially those first few weeks after she was born..." he trailed off.
Mel looked down at her hands in her lap with a small careful smile. "Caught that, did you?"
"We would never hold you to something you said in an abstract way three and a half years ago," Blaine assured her. "A lot has changed since the day we asked you to be our surrogate."
Mel sighed as she looked up. "That's true."
"Mel, honey..." Kurt started as he reached across the table for her hand. "We wish you had told us what you were dealing with at the time...but we understand, we really do. And now that you're with Luke, we completely understand if it's not...if the plans have changed, we promise we do."
Blaine nodded next to him and smiled at his friend. Mel chuckled a little before answering.
"Well, I don't know if it's just because I'm on this side of it, or if I've lost my mind completely-but aspects of being pregnant don't sound as horrible to me as before. I've actually been thinking about it a lot lately," she admitted. "I know I..." she sighed as she took a sip of water and composed herself a little. "I know I was a little...caught off guard with the way I felt after she was born."
She finally looked up again and both men were nodding.
"And trying to hide it from you, well not only did it not work, apparently," she paused and returned both of their grins. "Probably wasn't the best idea, but even if it took me awhile to really get used to my emotions, I think I was finally fully convinced I did the right thing when this little monster hit the six month mark and didn't stop screaming for two weeks."
Blaine laughed and Kurt rolled his eyes with a groan and nodded.
Mel laughed, "I still don't know how you guys got through those two weeks, I really don't."
"Earplugs," Blaine told her simply. "Even with them in, we could still hear her perfectly. And we both cried-a lot."
"Look," Mel started after she had finished giggling at both of them. "You two are my best friends, you know me better than probably anyone."
Kurt smiled and reached across the table to take her hand again.
"I still," she shrugged. "I still don't want kids, I never have. But having Sophie was one of the best things I've ever done. As hard as it was...I'd do it all again, if I had to."
Blaine bit his lip as he rubbed his hand down Sophie's back and kissed her temple.
"And Luke is Leah's brother...he knew something about our situation before Leah even introduced us...and Luke and I have talked about it a little," she assured them. "He doesn't want kids either, and he knows that I'm Sophie's 'mother' in the biological sense, and that I gave birth to her. The probability of a second baby being on the table is something we've talked about as well, and it doesn't seem to freak him out. So don't worry about that aspect of it. If you guys decide this is something you want, he and I will talk seriously about it...but I would never be with someone who disagreed with something that was this important to me."
Kurt nodded as he looked over at Blaine again.
Mel laughed and held up her hands. "Look, it's not a decision you need to make right now over lunch," she promised. "I was just putting some feelers out there, testing the waters to see where we were."
Blaine nodded as Sophie shifted against his chest and he kissed the top of her head. "We've always known that we wanted her to have a sibling...the timing is what has always been up in the air."
"Can we give you a strong maybe, and let you know for sure soon?" Kurt asked, leaning back as the waitress dropped off their coffee and dessert.
Mel nodded and gave them a reassuring smile.
"Of course. Let me know when you've decided, and what you've decided. Just know that I'm on board. That is, as far as the next few years are concerned," she laughed. "Once I hit thirty, this baby bakery is closed for business."
xoxo
That night, after dinner and after Blaine had left for work, Kurt put a very sleepy Sophie to bed. After the long lunch, the three of them had taken her to the park. She'd had a blast, but it had cut her nap in half. She'd been a crabby mess the rest of the night and was ready and willing to climb into her bed that night.
She was fast asleep before Kurt could even finish her first book and didn't stir once after Kurt rocked her and tucked her into the toddler bed they'd started using earlier in the summer.
After the dishes were done and the loft was picked up and straightened, Kurt pulled out his computer at the table in the dining room. He was spending most of the next week in his studio, working on his own. He needed to get everything for Rage done before Monday.
The online magazine had really taken off in the two years since its original publication, even had a small print local circulation and there were talks of broadening the circulation to the west coast. It would always be primarily online, but it was growing well and was something that both Isabelle and Kurt were immensely proud of. They were a good team and worked well together.
As the night wore on, Kurt did less and less work. He stared at his books, flipped through the pages of the mock-up for the next month, and looked over all the shoot layouts without really seeing anything.
He looked up in surprise when he heard the door open and someone walking down the hall.
"Hey," Blaine called brightly, setting his bag on the piano bench. "I figured you'd be in bed," he finished, walking over to meet his lips against his husband's in hello.
Kurt looked down at the clock on his computer and shrugged. "It's not that late. I was trying to get some work done."
Blaine nodded as he walked into the kitchen. He grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and walked back over to the table.
"I thought you were gonna grab a late bite after the show?" Kurt asked, finally giving up on getting anything done and closing his laptop.
Blaine shrugged, sitting down next to Kurt and taking a sip of water. "Eh, I wasn't all that hungry."
Kurt looked over at him and smirked. "Somethin' else on your mind?" he asked.
Blaine shrugged again and gave him a small smile.
"Me too." Kurt sighed.
A few quiet moments passed before Kurt rubbed his hands down his face and shook his head. "Are we crazy?" he mumbled through his fingers. "We are finally getting more than three consecutive hours of sleep a night. Sophie is completely potty trained and starting school full time this fall. I'm showing a line again this spring, and you are in a show that you really love and are really passionate about."
Blaine shook his head. "I know..." he trailed off, Kurt reaching over to take his hand. "But all I can think about is how fast Sophie is growing up, how much I miss counting her tiny little toes and how she felt sleeping on my chest."
"But...diapers, and disgusting smelling formula," Kurt interjected.
"The first time she smiled, or came up with 'Ba' all on her own," Blaine dreamed.
"Spit up in your hair."
"When she would stop crying as soon as she knew it was you holding her."
"Screaming at 2:00 a.m. when you have an 8:00 a.m. call."
"When you were feeding her a bottle and she would grab your finger so tight and you would wonder where all that strength came from."
Kurt leaned back in his chair and laughed. "Yeah...that was pretty great."
"I remember I read this thing," Blaine started, clearing his throat. "That said that when a woman has the desire to get pregnant again, she should ask herself if she would be willing to adopt. If she wouldn't, then it's a biological thing and not an actual desire to have another child."
Kurt looked over and squeezed Blaine's hand in his. "You would adopt."
Blaine looked over, the corners of his mouth turned up in a wistful smile. "I really would," he agreed. "We always wanted Sophie to have a sibling, and I didn't want them too far in age. Yes it will be hard and yes, it's doing everything all over again...only this time even more because we will have a whole other kid running around who needs to be taken care of and loved just as much..."
"But," Kurt prompted.
"But, I still wanna do it. I think we're ready."
Kurt shook his head and stood up, he walked over so he could wrap his arms around Blaine's shoulders from behind and kissed his cheek. Blaine hummed out a small laugh and leaned into the hug, letting the scent of Kurt wash over him.
"I'm in, but only if you're in with me. If you really don't want to right now, I understand. We can give it some more time," Blaine promised, his voice soft and unassuming.
Kurt kissed Blaine's cheek one more time before straightening up and turning so he was sitting on the table in front of him. He took one of Blaine's hands again and grinned.
xoxo
Kurt looked up and waved when he spotted Mel walk in the cafe a few days later.
"Hiya handsome," she laughed, leaning over to kiss his cheek as she dropped her bag on the back of the chair and sat down. "Seeing you twice in one week? I must really be home."
Kurt winked at her as a waitress walked over. Mel ordered a cafe au lait and a piece of flourless chocolate cake before settling in her chair and crossing her legs.
"So," she began after Kurt had ordered his soy latte and slice of cheesecake. "To what do I owe you fitting me into the break in your day?"
Kurt laughed and shrugged as he closed his laptop and pushed it to the side of the table to give his friend his complete attention. "Just...felt like a talk with my best friend."
Mel set down her glass after taking a sip of water and wiped her mouth. "Aw, I'm your best friend?"
Kurt eyed her critically. "Don't fish, Melissa Grace," he paused as Mel held up her hands and laughed. "You, Blaine, and Rachel sit at the very top...I promise."
Mel winked at him and tucked a strand of her long brown hair behind her ear. "Right backatcha."
Kurt shook his head and laughed. "Man, sometimes I think about..." he shook his head again as Mel nudged him under the table.
"I mean," he started again, leaning back as their coffee and dessert was set in front of them and Mel thanked their waitress. "If you had told 16 year old Kurt, that ten plus years down the road, Rachel Berry would be included in the people he loved most in the world...he probably would have bitch-slapped you."
Mel cracked up as she set her mug of coffee down and wiped her mouth. "You guys weren't always close?"
Kurt sighed out a laugh. "Oh god, no. We'd gone to school together since we were kids...but no. Rachel was a very...intense child. We didn't officially meet until high school and even then..."
Mel laughed as she offered Kurt a bite of her cake. "Kurt," she chastised. "I can't imagine you being much different as a child."
Kurt lifted one shoulder in acceptance and nodded. "True. In fact, we were actually enemies for a long time before we started to get close. It took a while for us to figure out how similar we were and are...and then how we could work that into a friendship."
Mel nodded and reached her fork over. Kurt pretended to pull his plate away, but allowed her to get the bite of his cheesecake as she had let him take one of her chocolate cake. Mel winked at him over the rim of her coffee mug.
"So..." Kurt sighed, setting his fork down and taking a sip of his latte. "Blaine and I talked the other night."
"Oh yeah?"
Kurt nodded and took a deep breath. "He and I are still-hashing things out, deciding if and when and...everything else," he paused again as Mel nodded and set her own fork down. "But, I was thinking that you and I needed to have a talk first."
"Uh oh," Mel laughed nervously. "I feel like I just got sent to the principal's office."
Kurt chuckled as he shook his head and reached his hand over to squeeze hers on the table. "No," he assured her. "But...I feel like..."
Mel eyed him carefully. "What's up, Kurt?"
Kurt paused just for a moment because he'd been thinking about this conversation for two days, and now his words were getting all jumbled up in his head. He didn't want to hurt his friend, but this was something they needed to talk about.
"Look, I know we kind of...touched on this, the other day." Mel's eyes immediately dropped to her lap. "But before we go any further...I need to know you will be okay, we need to know that you will be okay.
"I just..." he paused again, biting his lip. "You are way too important to us, and we were so worried about you. But we didn't know how far to push you, or if we should push you at all."
"Oh Kurt," she started, reaching her hand across the table to grasp his.
"Mel, we knew how upset you were...but we had no idea how to approach you, or even if we should."
"I'm sorry I scared you," she said, holding his hand tightly. "But I was so..." she paused again before taking a breath and continuing. "I was so caught off guard with how I ended up feeling. Everyone kept telling me, 'be careful' and 'prepare yourself'...but I didn't listen, and just kept going on with my everyday life like something major wasn't about to happen, like my life wasn't about to change just as much as yours and Blaine's was.
"It would have been a great time to still have a mother," she added with just a hint of bitterness that Kurt understood better than most.
He nodded, sniffing and pursing his lips together.
"And then, she was born and I was smacked upside my head with how I felt, and...it took me a while to really get a handle on how I needed to move on from there. Hiding it from you guys, it just felt like the right thing to do. I felt like-I didn't want to worry you unnecessarily," she paused and smiled. "My efforts were obviously futile as you knew the whole time."
Kurt sighed. "Then, why? If it was so hard, why do you want to do it all again? Why put yourself through it all again?"
Mel smiled. "Because..." she paused. "She is still one of the best things I ever did. When I think back on the greatest moments of my life, the first comic I had printed in a newspaper, all those silly stories I wrote and drew to make my mom laugh when the chemo was draining her, the byline of my first book..." she trailed off again as Kurt wiped the single tear that had leaked from his eye.
"When I think about all those things, Sophie sits right up there with all of them as one of the greatest moments of my life."
Kurt nodded and patted his chest. "Mine too."
"Carrying her, and giving birth to her, and then watching two people I loved so much be so happy? I meant what I said the other day, I would do it all over again if I had to, even not knowing what I know now. But this time, I'll be better prepared for how I'll feel and how I'll deal when the time comes. I'm even more confident about that now."
Kurt nodded as he took a breath. "You have to know, you are our family. And you always will be, whether or not we do this again."
Mel nodded as she swiped her free hand under her eye and smiled. "Of course I know that, all three of you are my family, too."
Kurt eyed her carefully before he started speaking again. "But you have to promise me, you have to promise us, that you won't shut us out again."
Mel huffed out a watery laugh.
"Like, distance is fine. If we do this again and you need the space and distance to deal with the enormity of the situation, we completely understand that, and will give you all the time you need-as long as you are honest with us."
Mel nodded as she squeezed Kurt's hand in hers. "I promise to be honest, if you promise to take me at my word."
Kurt shook his head and grinned. "Deal."