Disclaimer: The following is extremely random, violent, weird, and rude. It may be racist or offensive in your view. Not for the weak of heart. I own NONE of the characters seen in this play, nor the TV shows, books, movies, or whatever they came from. I am in no way affliated with any of them. Thank you for reading.

key: M= Michael Jackson

O= Oprah Winfrey

_= You may replace this blank with any swear word you wish, however I had in mind the 'n' word. If it is too offensive for you, feel free to replace it with the "b" words or other swear words.

The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Barack Shakespeare:

ACT 1, SCENE 1

M: DUDES WUTZ UP!

O: NUTTIN MUCH

M: GOT SOME TEQUILA HERE 4 YA, U THING RHYMING W/ RIG

O: YUHHHSSSS I'VE BEEN WANTIN SUM 4EVA!111 MAH TEQUILA ROX

HARRY POTTER: ABRA KEDABRA!1

M AND O BOTH FALL DOWN

M: OMGGG HELP!111

O: GOD HELP US!11

M AND O DIE

GANDALF (IN A BRITISH ACCENT): FRODO GET THE RING 2 MORDOR!1

HARRY POTTER: NO U

DARTH VADER: HARRY POTTER I AM UR MOM

HARRY POTTER: OMG U CHEATED ON SNAP!1

DARTH VADER: SNAP WUZ NOT UR FATHER, I WAS UR FATHER

GANDALF: THEREFORE DARTH VADER IS UR FATHER AND UR MOTHER!

HARRY POTTER: GTFO U OLD MAN

OSAMA BIN LADEN: IMMA BOMB ALL U BITCHEZ

HARRY POTTER: *INSERT RANDOM LATIN HERE* SECTUMSEMPRA!

TOM RIDDLE (IN A SEDUCTIVE VOICE): HARRY POTTER, WILL YOU MARRY ME?

SNAPE: SI!

DARTH VADER: GTFO UR NOT IN THE ADVENTURES OF HUCKLEBERRY FINN

HUCKLEBERRY FINN: U GTFO IM SUPPOSED TO BE whiteWASHING A FENCE. OH WAIT THAT WAS TOM SAWYER.

SNAPE: DOOD NEITHER R U

TOM RIDDLE: WHAT THE BLOODY HELL ARE WE DOING HERE?

HUCKLEBERRY FINN: OMG ITS U TOM!1 WHER DA BL00DY HELL HAV YOU BEEN?

TOM RIDDLE: CRUCIO U _!

HUCK: AHHHHH!1 HELP ME U _!1

PUCK: IM FROM MIDSUMMER NITES DREAM WUT AM I DOIN HER NOW

TOM RIDDLE: UR IN HAMLET DUHHH! THIS IS A DREAM

PUCK: OMG WTF!1

HAMLET: TO BE OR NOT TO BE, THAT IS THE QUESTION

ODYSSEUS: O PENELOPE, PENELOPE, WHEREFORE ART THOU PENELOPE MY LOVE?

JULIET: RIGHT HITHER, MY LOVE

GENDERLESS WEIRD SISTERS: UR ALL GONNA DIEEEE

JULIET: GTFO U MALE _!1

HARRY POTTER: GAIZ I FOUND A TELEPORTING SPELL WE CAN ALLLLLL USE TO GET DA FUQ OUTTA HERE

DARTH VADER: PLEASE DO TELL US, KIND SIR

GANDALF: HE'S JUST GOING TO SHOUT RANDOM LATIN UNTIL HE HITS A SPELL

HARRY POTTER: BULBUS CAECILIUS METELLA GLADIUS NOCTIS STELLA LUCIS CAELUM MODESTUS VILBIA, THAT S1UT

MARTIN LUTHER KING JR: Peace, my friends.

HUCK (GRABS A CRUDE STICK FROM THE GROUND):IMMA BEAT THE S#IT OUTTA U

MARTIN: I SAID PEACE, MY EFFING BRETHREN!111PEACEEE OUT BITCHEZ

TOM RIDDLE: ERECTUMSEMBRA!

TOM RIDDLE SENDS A BROWN LIGHT FLYING AT MARTIN, BUT IT MISSES AND HITS...

HARRY POTTER: OMG OMG WTF IS HAPPENING TO ME I AM HAVING THE WEIRDEST BONER RIGHT NOW GUYS.

MACBETH: OMG ME 2. LIKE, DA FUQ, I WUZ HAVING SOME NICE SEX WITH MY CRAZY LADY N KILLIN N CHILLIN THEN I CAME HERE.

GANDALF: U CAME HERE, I SEE WAT U DID THAR.

JULIET: STFU U OLD PEDOPHILE...CREEPER...

DARTH VADER: IS THERE A LUKE SKYWALKER HERE?

YODA: NO, MY LORD.

HUCK & PUCK: WHAT THE PHUCK IS GOING ON?

SNAPE: LMAO THAT WUZ SO CLEVER DOOOOD. HAHAHA. I LAUGH.

HAMLET: THERE IS NOTHING EITHER GOOD OR BAD, BUT THINKING MAKES IT SO.

ODYSSEUS: DA FUQ IS UP WIFF U AND UR FANCY TALK MAN!

HAMLET: THINE FACE IS NOT WORTH SUNBURNING.

MARTIN: PEACE, YE FAT GUTS!11

~To Be Continued~

Act 1, Scene 2 coming soon, thanks for reading. Please Review. Thank You.