Disclaimer: I don't own em, not making anything, and I may return them when I'm done with 'em...If I get done with 'em!! Okay, so the title really doesn't have anything to do with the story. I just felt like using it. This one's for Kym, because the incident it's based on really happened to her the other day. Poor Babe! It's not beta'd, so read at your own risk. Oh, spew warnings, language, and most importantly, SMUT! I gotta thank Sue (JGIO) for looking this over for me. Thanks, Babe. You're the greatest! Fits RE's Liz's Summer Heat Wave challenge. Please tell me if you find any missing punctuation. I hope I fixed it all, but you never know...

You Want Fries With That?

It was a hot muggy day in Trenton, New Jersey, and the humidity level seemed like it was at 100% and rising. Murphy had been stalking me for the past two days, and since my latest POS had bit the dust barely two days ago, courtesy of my ever-present bad luck, I was back to driving Big Blue. Yeah, you guessed it; no air conditioning. In honor of the weather, and my snarky attitude on account I was stuck with the QEII again, I'd chosen to wear cargo shorts, a skimpy tank top, and unfortunately, my Doc Martens. I say unfortunately, because my feet were literally baking. I couldn't wear my trusty Nikes, because on one of his rare visits, Bob had chewed the eyelets off the left one, and left a buttload of drool in the right one. Bye bye Nikes!

No radio, either, which in most cases meant I had to hunt skips on my own unless Lula chose to drive. Today, as it turns out, Lula's car was in the shop for some minor cosmetic work, which meant we were stuck with the Blue behemoth. Now, usually when this situation comes up, Lula would opt out of our partnership in favor of 'helping Connie', my cousin/boss Vinnie's voluptuous secretary/girl Friday, run the office. Not an option today, because Joyce Barnhardt, my arch-enemy, was 'in consultation' with my slimy boss, and both of us would rather pick up dog shit than be stuck listening to those two go at it all day. Never mind that I had to bribe her with her own bucket of chicken from Cluck in a Bucket and a Big Mac meal...with dessert. Hey, don't judge! I really needed her help with this one, hence her presence here with me.

Harry Fesselman was our skip, weighing in at an impressive 431 pounds, who decided not to show up for court after he was arrested for 'theft of property'. Seems ole Harry filled up a few too many times at the All You Can Eat buffet, and they ran out of food, causing multiple complaints by the other customers. Who knew the man could put away that much food? Yeesh!

We'd been hunkered down in Big Blue on Grant Street outside of 'Hefty Harry's' row house for over three hours; sweat was running down my back between my shoulder blades, and Lula was getting bored. When Lula gets bored, she gets hungry. She'd already polished off the chicken and the Big Mac meal, and I was starting to get concerned she'd start on the upholstery next. Kinda channeling her 'inner Bob', if you know what I mean. Oh don't get pissy! You ever see Lula when shes hungry and bored? I didn't think so!

I was using Harry's FTA file as a fan, contemplating hanging it up for the day, since I was hot and sticky and wasn't really sure even Big Blue would survive Lula's boredom, when I caught movement out of the corner of my left eye. It was Harry, and he was waddling out of his garage and up to his front door, where he disappeared inside. "Finally!" I murmured, checking to make sure I had another set of cuffs, my stun gun, and an extra large canister of defense spray before opening my door to get out. I figured I might need the economy size considering Harry's bulk. Lula slid out the passenger door, pulling out her Glock from her voluminous purse and checking the action.

"No guns! The guy's only charged with a misdemeanor!" My voice came out a little squeaky, but then I get that way around Lula when she's got a gun in her hand.

Lula harrumphed and then rounded on me, her hands on her hips in classic rhino mode. "Yo never let me have no fun! What if he decides to sit on yo skinny ass? Yo gonna want me to shoot 'im then?

I just sighed and motioned her to cover the back door while I went to the front. If I didn't need the money for rent that was overdue, I'd bag it and try tomorrow. Like an idiot this morning I'd told Dillon, my building super, that I'd have the rent to him today by 5 o'clock. I didn't want to back out on my word since he'd already been covering for me for over a week. The way I saw it, I had no choice.

I was nearly to the front door when it flew open, and the most god-awful stench assailed my nose. I gagged, forcing down the bile that was trying valiantly to make an appearance.

There stood Harry in all his rolls of glory, wearing nothing but a filthy pair of too-tight briefs that didn't really cover much. "Whaddaya want, bitch? I ain't buyin no shit, 'lessin' taday's a freebie!" Euww! He was worse with the eyebrow action than I was, but then I was having a hard time focusing on anything but trying to keep my stomach contents from joining the party. My eyes were watering so bad I felt like I just went to two of Mama Macaroni's funerals back-to-back!

"Harry Fesselman" I choked out, trying not to breathe through my nose. "my name is Stephanie Plum, and I represent your bail bonds company." I gagged, desperately trying to find some clean air to inhale. "You missed your court date, so you need to come with me to reschedule." I turned my head to the side, hoping to catch a whiff of clean air. Damn, eu de skunk smelled better than this guy!

Out of the corner of my eye I saw him start to retreat into the house and close the door, yelling "Fuck that shit! I ain't goin to no court! I paid for my meal, and I ain't wastin my time goin with yer stupid ass!"

I sprinted for the door, my foot catching the flimsy piece of wood just before it closed, and I shoved it open to see Harry waddling as fast as his pudgy little feet would carry him as he headed towards the back door. I pulled out my stun gun, and for once, once, I caught up with my skip and managed to reach out and stun him on the ass. He went down so hard the floorboards vibrated, and then I noticed the smell start to intensify the closer I got to him.

By this time Lula had joined me, having seen Harry running for the door towards her since he didn't seem to believe in curtains. Apparently, Harry hadn't locked his back door (that's Lula's story, and I'm sticking to it!), so she just waltzed right in, holding her nose and grimacing.

"Damn, girl! What's that smell? There someone dead in here? 'Cuz you know I don't do dead people. Don't need no death cooties on me. I gots me a hot date with Tankie tonight, and death cooties don't come out with just one shower. No sirree! Nuh uh! I'm waitin outside!" She made to leave the way she came in.

"Lula wait! No! That smell's coming from Harry. Just help me turn him over and cuff him, then I'll call Tank and ask him to send a couple of guys to help drag him out."

Lula backed off, rummaging in her purse. "Girl, that's just nasty! Now, I knows I got some Vick's here somewheres...yes!" She triumphantly pulled out a familiar blue jar and hurriedly globbed some onto her lip under her nose, then tucked it back into her purse. At my questioning look, she said defensively, "What? Tankie taught me that!"

I shrugged and we both bent down, each grabbing a body part and attempted to roll him onto his stomach. When Lula lifted his arm and rolled him, I not only got a whiff of one source of the foul odor, but saw something crawl out of the folds that his arm had covered. I turned and promptly threw up, missing Harry by mere inches. I held my breath and turned back to Harry, slapping the two sets of cuffs on him before I backed off again, causing Lula to start cursing a blue streak.

"What the fuck you doin'? I ain't breakin my ba...oh shit, oh shit, oh shit! Cockroaches! I hate cockroaches!" Her screeching nearly pierced my eardrums, but that was the least of my worries. My stomach was trying to follow the contents I'd unloaded as black spots began to cloud my vision. I grabbed my cell phone off my hip and started to stagger towards the front door, hoping to make it before I passed out. I couldn't be certain, but there seemed to be an awful lot of noise coming from the back of the house where Lula had taken off to.

I was down on my knees by the time I hit the doorway, crawling determinedly out to the porch where I gulped in air just a tad less rancid than inside the house. I wasn't sure which speed dial button I pushed; I just prayed someone would respond, and fast.

It seemed like only moments later, while I was occupied with trying to breathe as well as keeping my insides from becoming outsides, that I heard the screech of tires that heralded the arrival of one or more of Ranger's Merry Men. A second later I heard the sound of running boots, more specifically Lester's boots, with Bobby a hair behind him.

"Beautiful!" "Bomber!" I heard simultaneously, anxiety and fear leaking through their tone as they both knelt down next to me. "What happened?" "Are you all right?" "Where's Lula?" Lester started to sound a little panicky.

Just as I heard Lester say her name, Lula came racing from around the back side of the house like the hounds of hell were chasing her, screaming her fool head off. "There's millions of 'em! Call the exterminator! Call the fuckin' Marines! Damn, call Raid!" She barreled past us and jumped into Big Blue, rolling up the windows and locking the doors. Huh?

I heard another set of screeching tires, only this time they belonged to a blue and white with the words 'Trenton Police Department' stenciled on the sides, followed by an old beat up Fairlane with Joe Morelli at the wheel. I would've groaned at that, but I was still trying to breathe air that didn't leave a nasty taste on my tongue. I couldn't be bothered with inconsequential bodily functions that might interfere with things like breathing!

Carl Costanza and Big Dog hopped out of their radio car and rushed towards us, Joe following at a more sedate pace. "What happened, Steph?" Carl called out worriedly, followed by Big Dog's "You okay, Steph?"

I finally managed to squeak out "Air" before I could pass out in front of everyone. I really didn't want to add any more points to my embarrassment bag today, and fainting would certainly cause an overflow.

Suddenly Lester and Bobby both wrinkled their noses, starting to cough as a slight breeze pushed a whiff their way. Carl and Big Dog followed suit, since they were standing directly behind us. Joe, the ass, stood just off to the side, frowning at all of us like we were retarded; looked like he was standing upwind. The Gods must've really been smiling on me then, because just as I hoped he'd get a plus-sized dose and toss his cookies in front of all and sundry, the wind shifted, giving the five of us a breath of clean air, whereas Joe got the full effect.

I couldn't help but start cracking up at the results. I was joined seconds later by the rest of my little group when they all turned and watched in amazement as Joe ralphed all over the front of himself. Geez! Try turning your head, Mr. 'I'm trained for this and you're not!' Maybe he should've waited 'til later to hit Pino's for that meatball sub?

I was finally able to breathe without gagging, so I turned to Lester, sighing as I met his laughing gaze. "Um, I kinda need some help here, guys. You might want to call the HazMat trucks first, though. At least a gas mask might come in handy." At their questioning looks, I pointed towards the house.

Carl and Big Dog, bless their pointed little heads, decided to brave the smell and walked into the house tepidly, returning seconds later coughing and hacking as they scrambled for breathable air. "Good God, Steph!" Cough. "The guy's still alive, and the roaches" Gag. "are crawling all over him like he's their next meal!" Groan. "How the hell could you" Gulp. "stay in there long enough" Wheeze. "to cuff his sorry ass?" I almost felt bad for Carl. Almost. The jerk probably won a bet off me today if his smile when he drove up was any indication.

I desperately wanted a toothbrush right then, so I just shrugged and nodded my head towards the house, looking up at Lester and Bobby. "Anyone got a pickup we can haul him to the station in? No way am I gonna fit him in the Buick, plus I'd never get the smell out. I need my body receipt."

Carl's eyes bugged out. "He's your skip?"

I nodded.

"You were gonna bring him to the station like that?"

I nodded again.

"No way! He's not coming into our station stinking like that! You gotta clean him up!" He was shaking his head, hands spread out like he was pushing himself away.

I smirked. "I'm just the bounty hunter. It's not my responsibility to check his hygiene. I'm just supposed to bring him in and get my body receipt. Says so in the 'Bounty Hunter's Handbook'."

Lester snickered. "Might wanna hose him off first if he smells as bad as I think he does!" He and Bobby each gripped an elbow, helping me stand so we could move a little farther away from the stench. Carl and Big Dog grimaced. I could tell they weren't looking forward to Harry coming anywhere near the station house until he got decontaminated. Good luck with that!

An idea popped into my head. "Lester?"

"Yeah, Beautiful?"

"About that pickup truck?"

"Coming right up!" He took out his phone, hitting speed dial. "Woody, grab your pickup and meet us at" He looked up at the house number. "61 Grant Street. We need some help with a skip. Oh, and bring some gas masks!" He snapped his phone shut and grinned as he clipped it back onto his belt. "I cant wait to hear this idea of yours!"

Ten minutes later Woody pulled up in a beat up old pickup, his expression clearly not in Rangeman mode since curiosity was warring with nervousness on his face. I couldn't really blame him. After all, how many skips would you need to wear a gas mask for just to pick up?

Lester, Woody and Bobby each donned a gas mask and pair of gloves, then went inside. They returned a few minutes later with a wobbly but pissed off Harry. Someone had evidently decided he needed a little more camouflage, because Harry's lower half was draped with a tattered bedspread, which barely met at the clothespin used to secure it around his bulk.

I walked ahead of them and let down the tailgate, grabbing a set of shackles from behind the seat while they hoisted Harry into the back. Woody secured him to the bars that were bolted to the bed of the truck, then hopped down and slammed the tailgate shut. Lester looked at me enquiringly.

I simply nodded my head and started back towards Big Blue, calling out "follow me, guys!" over my shoulder.

"Uh, Bomber?" Bobby didn't sound too enthusiastic.

I stopped and turned around. "Yeah, Bobby?"

He blew out a breath. "You were damn near passed out just a few minutes ago. You think you ought to be driving?"

I frowned. "I'm okay, Bobby. I just couldn't breathe because of the stench. Well, that and seeing the cockroach crawl out from under the fat rolls. I'm fine now."

All three of the guys paled when I mentioned where the cockroach crawled from; all I caught was a groan from Carl before I heard him start to wretch behind me. Hope he remembered to turn his head...

I continued on to the Buick, rapping on the window for Lula to unlock the door. She looked at me wide-eyed, shaking her head 'no' when I motioned a little more forcefully. "Lula, there's no cockroaches out here." I had to yell in order for her to hear me. "Harry's in the back of Woody's truck, so you're safe from the bugs. Now open. The door."

She harrumphed and then unlocked the door, crossing her arms over her ample chest as she grumbled.

I slid into the driver's seat and started Big Blue, checking my rearview mirror to make sure the guys were ready to go. I looked over at Lula; she simply grunted and began rifling through her purse, finally pulling out her Glock. She checked the action, then looked over at me. "I see one teeny tiny cockroach, and I'm poppin' a cap in its ass. Then I'm poppin' a 'nuther one in yo skinny white ass fo makin me ride in a car with a roach!" I fought to keep the grin from showing, instead averting my head to watch the road ahead of me while glancing in my rearview mirror every so often.

I noticed that Carl and Big Dog were following Lester and Bobby, who were following Woody, who seemed to be glued to Big Blue's rear bumper. I had no clue what happened to Joe. I really didn't care. We made quite a caravan as we rolled out onto Hamilton and down the road a ways before I finally pulled into the lot of the drive-thru car wash. My phone rang, and I heard Lester laughing in the background.

"Bomber, you're not doing what I think you're doing, are you?" I could barely understand Bobby, he was laughing so hard.

I grinned evilly, even though I knew he couldn't see my face. "Sit back and enjoy the show, guys!" I pushed 'end' on my phone and threw it into my purse. I stopped the Buick, got out, and strolled over to the cashier.

"One truck, please. Regular wash and rinse, hold the wax." I told the girl, grinning cheekily as she handed me the ticket.

I sauntered over to Woody's truck, resting my arms on the top of the door when he rolled his window down. "The wash is on me, Woody. Have fun!" I handed him the ticket and watched his eyes widen as he realized what I had in mind. I stepped back and heard him start to laugh as he rolled up his windows, then shifted the truck into gear and slowly entered the wash tunnel.

Lester and Bobby came up behind me, clutching their stomachs and laughing like hyenas. "Beautiful, you're priceless! This one's going onto the wall of fame." They burst into another round of laughter, gasping for breath as tears rolled down their faces.

I looked over my shoulder at them, evil grin still in place. I looked past them and spotted Carl and Big Dog still in their radio car. Big Dog was laughing so hard that he was crying, and Carl wasn't much better, although he was obviously trying to keep a modicum of composure since he seemed to be on his radio to dispatch. So glad I could entertain them. Jerks!

I could just see the front of Woody's truck as it entered the rinse stage when I heard the familiar whine of a high performance engine entering the lot, then roll to a stop a short distance behind me. I looked back at Ranger as he gracefully exited the Porsche. I wanted to lick him; he looked so delicious in his black Armani suit. Guess he got out of his meeting early.

Even though he had his sunglasses on I could tell he was grinning; his almost-smile wasn't very noticeable, but I'd learned to read his face a lot the past few years; much more so since we'd been spending so much time together the last couple of months, starting with the day after I split with Joe for good. Although we weren't necessarily a couple yet, much to my chagrin, we seemed to be getting closer. He'd been letting me in lately; sharing his childhood memories, his hopes and dreams, as well as tidbits about his family; the first being that Lester was actually his cousin. I'd always wondered how he got away with goading Ranger and the guys so much...

I smiled, giving him a finger wave as he walked over to me, resting a warm hand on the small of my back. "Hey Ranger. Come to watch the show?" I looked up at him and grinned, wondering who called him. Probably Bobby. Lester'd been laughing too hard to be anything close to coherent on the phone.

"Babe. Heard you had some problems. Proud of you". He smiled for real this time, all 200 watts, and out in the open too. Wow!

I was hoping he'd kiss me, but then I remembered that I really needed a toothbrush. I'd munched on Tic Tacs all the way over from Harry's house, but they didn't quite cut it. A kiss would have to wait. Besides, I'd rather not have an audience when he stuck his tongue down my throat. I tended to get a little moist in certain places when he did that!

His eyes darkened, and when I heard his whispered "Playing with fire here, Babe," I realized he'd read my expression. I blushed and looked back over to the wash tunnel. Woody's truck was just emerging, and Harry was yelling bloody murder. Woody told us later that Harry'd been yelling the whole time, although we hadn't heard a thing. Seems the machines that powered the solutions and brushes are so loud, they drown out just about everything.

Woody pulled his truck up to us, rolling down his window and leaning out, still laughing. "Hey Steph. How about I head on over to the station? The guys and I will get him inside and processed, and you can pick up your body receipt, okay?"

I smiled. "That would be great, Woody, thanks. I'm right behind you!" I waved as he headed out; Bobby and Lester already back in their SUV and following him out of the parking lot. Carl and Big Dog brought up the rear, leaving me alone with Ranger. Oh, and Lula, who absolutely refused to get out of Big Blue.

Ranger glanced over to the Buick, seeing Lula sitting there with a mutinous look on her face and her arms crossed over her chest. His lips quirked in that almost-smile again. "Come back to the office when you're done at the police station. That is, if you can pry Lula out of your car."

I couldn't help but give him a teasing grin. "And if I can't? What will we do then?"

Eyes gleaming, he grinned back, a little more noticeably this time. "We'll just have to let Tank handle her then, won't we?"

Go Lula!

I watched Ranger walk back over to his Porsche, sliding in and starting the car that made my panties wet every time found myself sitting inside. He grinned at me before he moved off: leaving me desperate again. Every time I came into contact with him it got worse. That man and I needed to talk!

I walked over and stuffed myself in the Buick, having the foresight this time to take the keys with me. I looked over at Lula, who still had a mutinous look on her face. "Oh c'mon Lula! It wasn't that bad! Besides, the guys have already got Harry on his way to the station, and I'm pretty sure any bugs left on him have drowned by now. Would you rather I drop you off at the office before I go to the station?"

She shrugged. "Yeah, that would probably be a good idea. I need to decompress after this one, since I still gots my date with Tankie tonight. Sorry I freaked, but girl, that was one nasty skip! I might need to get me some donuts to help me recover from all them bugs. I 'preciate it if you don't tell everyone."

I grimaced. "You won't need to worry about me; it's Lester and Bobby who might blab it around. Maybe Carl and Big Dog too, since they got there around the same time you came back out front. I'll talk to Carl and Tank; they might be able to persuade the others to keep it quiet." I pulled up in front of Vincent Plum Bail Bonds, idling as Lula nodded and opened her door, heaving herself out of the seat and slamming the door. I sighed and shifted back into gear, pulling out and heading towards the station. I was gonna owe Carl for this one, I could feel it.

I pulled up next to the back door of the police station, parking just behind Woody's pickup. I noticed Bobby had parked his SUV so that he could drive off in a hurry just in case he got an emergency alert. I smirked. He probably wouldn't need to worry about that since I was here at the station with him.

I got out of the Buick and walked up to the door, hitting the buzzer and waiting for someone to open up. Luckily I'd moved to the side, because the door immediately flew open, revealing Lester and Bobby standing on either side of the entrance. I smiled and stepped into the room, greeted by a raucous sound of applause; I blushed, wondering what the big deal was. It looked to me like the entire station had gathered in the booking area!

I noticed Carl and Big Dog standing off to the side, smiling almost as big as Lester and Bobby. Carl still looked a little pale, but he seemed to have forgotten how he'd hurled when I mentioned the cockroach. Hmm. Maybe I could blackmail him with that. Wonder if he'd work with me on Big Dog...

Robin Russell stepped forward, grinning as she reached me. "Steph, you are our hero! According to Carl, Fesselman stunk so bad the odor would've peeled the paint here. Thanks for getting him hosed down before he got here. He smelled bad enough as it was, but at least we were able to keep our lunches down!" She smirked, letting me know that she'd heard all about Joe's little experience at Harry's house.

I grinned back at her. "Thanks, Robin. I really appreciate that. I think this is probably the first time I didn't get laughed at when I brought in a skip. So, who won the pool?" Robin was probably the most supportive person in the whole TPD. She was always giving the guys a hard time about their bets on me, and refused to participate. In fact, she'd probably make sure whoever won gave me a cut of their winnings. She'd done that more than once before in the past.

She linked arms with me. "Let's go have a little chat with Picky, shall we? I'm sure he'd be more than happy to share his newfound wealth. After all, he's on booking detail all week. I think the Chief's pissed at him." She led me up to the desk, where Benjamin 'Picky' Gaspick was just finishing up my body receipt. Robin gave him a look and he blanched, handing over my receipt to me as well as a wad of cash, his hand shaking so bad he dropped it all before I could grab it.

He apologized, his voice squeaking a few octaves higher than normal as he gathered up the money and receipt again, placing it in my hand. "Sorry, Ms. Plum." I nodded and he cleared his throat. "Thank you for cleaning him up for us. You're really very good at your job." He ended his little speech a little lamely, but I wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth. I was gonna take whatever I could get out of these guys!

I glanced at Robin. She was giving him a neutral look, which I took to mean they'd be having another chat later on. I smiled at Gaspick. "Thanks. Have a nice day!" See, I could be magnanimous!

I stuffed the money and receipt in the pocket of my shorts, then turned to survey the rest of the room. Most everyone had cleared out by now, leaving Lester, Bobby, Carl and Big Dog along with Robin and myself. I walked over to Carl, leaning in to speak in a low voice. "You and Big Dog keep quiet about Lula's panic attack, and we keep a lid on your little puking episode. What do ya say?" He nodded vigorously, and I smiled. "Thanks." Looked like the party was over, and I had a couple of errands to run before I could head out to Rangeman. I wanted to get a move on.

I waved goodbye to Robin and the guys, while Lester and Bobby followed me out to my car. I gave them a finger wave as I settled myself in the Buick, starting the engine and pointing its monstrous hood towards the bonds office. In a matter of minutes I was parked in front of the front door, this time shutting it down before exiting and making my way inside the stuffy little office.

"Hey Connie, got Fesselman's receipt here. Vinnie still 'in conference'?" I asked as I set the receipt down on her desk in front of her. She shook her head, a sigh of relief escaping through her scarlet lips.

"Nope. Lucille called and Joyce flounced out of here like a five year old who missed the ice cream truck. Vinnie left about twenty minutes ago to pick up Lucille. Guess her father requested their presence for an early dinner tonight. Something about family from out of town coming in." She pulled out the checkbook and began to write me out a check, shaking her head at the thought of our boss.

While I was waiting, I looked over at the couch where I would usually find Lula lounging. The couch was empty, which meant Lula had already taken off for the day. She probably left to stock up on donuts before her date with Tank.

Connie snickered. "Yeah, her friend Charmaine came and picked her up. Just before the door closed I heard her say she wanted to hit the Tasty Pastry on the way home." She rolled her eyes.

My face flushed at being caught thinking out loud again, but I wasn't too worried. Connie would keep it secret...for a price. "Okay, well I gotta head back to my apartment. Dillon's waiting for the rent. I'll bring donuts tomorrow. Thanks, Con!" I grabbed my check from Connie's outstretched hand and hurried out the door before I really put my foot in my mouth.

In no time at all I was back at my apartment, rushing to Dillon's door to give him some of the cash I'd gotten off of Picky. My cut had been a little more than the bond fee I'd earned from Harry, so I had more than enough to make up the amount that was overdue. I'd put the check in the bank tomorrow, since I wouldn't have had time to get to the bank before it closed anyway.

That taken care of, I sprinted up the stairs to my apartment, not even checking to see if the elevator was available or not. Shocking, I know! I couldn't be bothered to wait for it, since I wanted to get to Rangeman as quickly as possible. There was something in Ranger's voice...

I unlocked my door and dropped my purse and keys on the table in the hallway, hitting the play button on my answering machine before stripping as I made my way to the bathroom. A couple of messages from my mother, which I resolutely ignored, and a telemarketing call. I zipped through the shower, not even pausing to appreciate the Bvlgari shower gel that Ranger had thoughtfully left. I exfoliated and ran the razor under my arms, thankful that I'd gotten waxed the day before my car blew up. At least I didn't need to shave my legs!

I jumped out of the shower, wrapping my hair in a towel and drying off quickly as I rushed into my room to select something nice to wear to Ranger's. I didn't want him to think I was trying too hard, even though I was, but I still wanted him to know he was worth the effort. I took out a bra and panty set, along with a pair of lacy thigh-highs that I'd purchased at Victoria's Secret a while back, dropping the towel and slipping into the scraps of lace carefully. I'd been saving them for what I hoped would be a night to remember with Ranger, envisioning him ripping the lingerie from my body before ruining me for even my dreams. I shook my head, needing to concentrate on getting ready. If I kept up with the visuals, I'd never get out of my apartment. At least, not sometime in the near future!

I finally pulled out a fairly modest (for me) wraparound dress in cobalt blue that I'd purchased but never worn yet. The hem came to mid-thigh, and the neckline plunged to just barely allow me to wear the bra I'd put on. It was made out of a light clingy jersey, and it hugged my curves like a second skin. I rummaged around in my closet for the matching FMP's I'd bought to go with it, since the 4 inch heels made my legs look a mile long.

Laying those out on the bed, I scampered back into the bathroom, taking the towel off my head and blow drying my hair into big sexy curls. I was going for that 'just fucked' look, and before the night was over, I was hoping to make it a reality. I started to apply makeup, keeping it light the way I knew Ranger preferred, and finished it off with a swipe of lip gloss.

Back in my bedroom, I slipped into the dress, smoothing it over my body as I stepped into the shoes. I looked into the mirror mounted on the back of my bedroom door, turning this way and that to see how the dress swirled around my body. Wow! Maybe I might have gone a little bit overboard, but I didn't have time to change, and I figured Ranger probably wouldn't mind. I'd know soon enough!

I spritzed on a little Dolce Vita and grabbed a small clutch purse that would do nicely for tonight. I shoved in my ID, cell phone, some money, and lip gloss, leaving just enough room for my keys. I went out into the kitchen, dropped a grape and a peanut into Rex's cage, and told him not to wait up for me, then grabbed my keys from the table and locked up my apartment.

This time I took the elevator, not wanting to misstep and twist an ankle or worse yet, fall flat on my face. It took a lot of effort to look this good, and I really wanted Ranger to get the benefits of it! I walked carefully out to the Buick, sliding in and starting the motor. I felt a fluttering in my stomach, and just hoped my nerves wouldn't cause me to chicken out. I've waited way too long for this night, and no way in hell was I gonna let anything spoil it!

Fifteen minutes later I was pulling up to the gate that blocked the underground garage at Rangeman from public access, the fluttering in my stomach building more and more the closer I got to Ranger's. The gate swung open even before I pointed the fob at it, and I smiled nervously into the camera I knew was monitoring the entrance. I really hoped the guys wouldn't give me a hard time tonight; in fact I was hoping I wouldn't run into any of them, especially Lester. Hopefully he'd already gone home to his wife and daughter, although I wasn't counting on it. He seemed to have an innate sense of showing up at the times I least wanted to see him, and tonight was definitely one of those nights!

I pulled Big Blue into an empty space next to Ranger's Porsche, which he always seemed to leave open for me when I came to work, or even when I just came over to eat dinner and watch a movie. His thoughtfulness of even the smallest things touched me, making me fall even harder than I'd anticipated.

The elevator was already there and open for me when I reached it, and I gave the guys monitoring the garage a finger wave in thanks, trying to quell the increasing nervousness now that I was there. I'd really look ridiculous if I chickened out now, I told myself, so just suck it up, Steph. You're a Jersey girl, remember?

The elevator didn't stop until it reached the 7th floor, and for that I was grateful. When the door opened, I stepped out, noticing that Ranger's door was slightly open in invitation. Here goes nothing, Steph. I took a deep breath and knocked lightly, pushing it open further and stepping inside when I heard Ranger call out to come in.

"Ranger?" The fluttering in my stomach was going double-time, and I hoped I wasn't going to embarrass myself.

"In the kitchen, Babe." Was it my imagination, or did his voice sound a lot deeper than normal?

I walked into the kitchen and stopped, transfixed by the sight of Ranger standing there in his dress slacks and the white silk shirt I'd seen him in earlier at the car wash. His hair was down, and he'd discarded his coat and tie, as well as unbuttoned the top buttons of his shirt leaving it untucked, and he'd rolled up the sleeves to reveal the strong muscles in his forearms. Yum!

I ran my eyes over him, noticing he'd also taken off his shoes and socks. He had the sexiest feet I'd ever seen, and I felt myself go a little damp as my gaze traveled up his legs to where the slacks molded themselves to the hard muscles, framing the most enticing package I've ever laid eyes on, bar none. I really wanted to stop there, but I didn't want to seem too obvious what had captured my interest. I continued to study him, my eyes locking onto the skin of his chest revealed by the open shirt, then going on to take in the hollow at the base of his throat, when I could see his pulse beating.

My gaze finally made it to his face, where his lips were slightly curved in his almost-smile and his eyes were black, indicating to me that he was extremely turned on. I hoped it was by my appearance almost as much as my presence. I had a feeling I'd soon find out.

"Babe, you look stunning." He'd been about to drink from a bottle of water, but he seemed to have forgotten all about it. I watched him set it down on the counter and begin walking towards me, his eyes never leaving mine. He stopped right in front of me, so close that a deep breath would have us touching chest to breasts, and I felt my knees begin to weaken.

He reached up with one hand and touched his fingertips to my cheek, lightly tracing the bones on my face while his other hand settled on my hip, drawing me into his embrace. "You take my breath away." I felt the whisper of his breath against my forehead as he spoke, his voice barely loud enough for me to catch, but to my over-sensitized emotions, it seemed like a shout.

His fingers trailed down my face to my throat, touching the hollow at the base before curving around the back of my neck. My breathing hitched at his closeness, then I felt him exert only the lightest pressure as he lowered his head, his lips meeting mine in the softest, most tender kiss I'd ever experienced. I brought my arms up to his, resting my hands on his forearms as he continued to brush my lips with his.

I whimpered as his tongue touched my lips, lightly running along the seam hesitantly, as if he was unsure it would be welcomed. In answer I parted my lips and touched his tongue with mine, which seemed to be his undoing. His tongue thrust into my mouth hungrily, dueling with mine even as it probed every nook and cranny it encountered. I began to suck on his tongue in response, my grip on his arms tightening as I pressed my hips into his. His hand moved around to my ass, caressing and kneading it even as mine left his arms and dropped to his hips, pulling him to me so I could rub myself against him.

I could feel the wetness leak out from my panties and I moaned, wanting and needing so badly to have his mouth sucking me; his fingers, and especially his cock, thrusting into me. Almost without volition my hands moved to his groin, cupping him with one hand while I began to squeeze with the other. His hand left my ass and found its way under my dress, his fingers brushing against my ruined panties before he suddenly grabbed them and ripped them off, leaving me exposed and dripping. I cried out as he pushed a finger through my lips and then inside me, his thumb brushing my clit, then pressing down firmly on the nub, which almost immediately triggered an orgasm so intense that I screamed.

He tore his mouth away from mine then, growling into my ear with a voice filled with so much passion and lust I came again. "This is forever, Babe. No going back. You're mine now." With that, he picked me up and strode into his bedroom, kicking the door shut before crossing over to the bed where he lowered me onto the center gently, reverently.

I looked up into his eyes, and for the first time, I finally recognized the emotions I'd glimpsed time and time again, but never identified. Yes, there was lust, but now I saw passion, raw and wild, and love so powerful it brought tears to my eyes.

This amazing man, who spoke so little before, was now telling me so much, and it was perfect.

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