All day, he would stand there, calling and calling.
"RUSSIAN SUSHI, IT'S GOOD, IT'S FRESH, IT'S TASTY"
But no-one ever came, apart from the times when he physically dragged some people he knew into the store, sat them down and gave them sushi for free.
Then there were the people he didn't like, case in point, a couple of gangsters that swaggered in, yellow scarves and all, and called across,
"HEY, GRANDPA! GET US SOME SUSHI! RIGHT HERE!"
The man had gestured at the table in front of him, a real smirk on his face.
Then, when he was refused sushi, he had flown into a rage and smashed up the place.
No, he was a bad one, Simon hadn't liked him at all...
The real ones that Simon hated, though, were the really massive douches that simply insulted him and his sushi, these were the ones that generally sent him over the edge.
One in particular, though, a repeat offender, really pissed Simon off.
The person was an adolescent by the name of Tanaka, his dad had gone to jail almost 10 years ago for a hit and run accident involving a 12 year old girl.
Every day, Tanaka would walk past the sushi place and call out to the towering Russian.
"HEY! RUSSIANS CAN'T DO SUSHI FOR SHIT!"
and
"LET A REAL JAPANESE MAN SELL SUSHI, YOU BLACK, GIRLY FUCK"
Simon would take the insults on a daily basis.
Coping with them, however, was a totally different matter.
Many a broken sign was handed in, from Simon taking out his anger on the sign, and many a crushed sushi coupon were put in the bin after a hard day of selling sushi.
All this damage came from Simon's anger management.
The day came, however, when Simon finally snapped.
Tanaka got physical.
Simon was advertising his sushi, the sky was a cloudless blue.
It didn't appear that Tanaka had any plans for that day.
Simon advertised and gave out fliers all morning, until at 12.
As Simon got down off his podium, he caught a flash of someone in his peripheral vision, just before they slammed into him.
Simon was strong, very, very strong, but he was only strong when he was ready for it.
If he wasn't ready for it, he would go down like the sack of potatoes, which is exactly what happened.
Fliers went everywhere, the sign clattered away and Simon was thrown to the ground.
Tanaka's sneering face appeared in his field of vision.
"Have a nice trip, grandpa?"
Simon, although he was able to get hurt, it was the resilience that stayed with him, as it did in this situation.
"Why yes, I did." Simon said, in an equally smart-ass manner.
Then Simon's arm shot up, grabbed Tanaka by the arm, and whilst still on the ground, twisted his shoulder and his elbow in opposite directions.
A sharp crack sounded, the sound of 5 breaks in the elbow joints and then a further 3 in the shoulder, shattering the left shoulder blade into 4 pieces.
Tanaka dropped to the ground, clutching at his arm, which hung in a disgusting position, he could touch his shoulder with his hand without moving his arm.
There was a lot of noise, Tanaka was screaming in pain, there was a crowd gathering, and pretty soon, an ambulance arrived to take the broken child away.
Simon, who had gotten up and walked off some time ago, still wasn't satisfied with his revenge and had a very special sushi delivery to make to the hospital.
at 7pm, a non descript van pulled into the parking lot of Ikebukuro Hospital, and a very descript man got out, he was carrying a large briefcase, he then walked into the hospital and went up to reception.
"Hello, I'm here to see Tanaka Oomari?"
The receptionist looked up, and up again into Simon's smiling face and nodded.
"Yeah, Level 3, Ward 6"
Simon bowed slightly.
"Thank you, miss."
Simon turned and walked around the corner, towards the elevator, and pushed the button.
BING
The lift opened, and Simon, ducking very low, got in, pressed Level 3 on the panel and was off.
The lift reached Level 3, and Simon got off, walking out into a darkened hallway, he figured that all the patients were supposed to be asleep.
Simon found Ward 6, it was all dark inside.
He crept in, closing the door quietly and assessed the patients around him.
Over on the far side of the room there were two old men, maybe 80 years old, and two more old people, not as old as the two, but old.
All of them were asleep.
Simon's real focus, however, was the teenager that had crashed into Simon that day.
To put it simply, he looked miserable
His whole arm was in a think cast, raised above his head by pullies, a metal traction poked out of his elbow and another poked out from his shoulder blade.
He was a real mess.
Simon, flashing his pearly whites in the darkness, softly walked over to Tanaka, pulled across the curtains and placed his briefcase down on the seat beside the bed.
Opening it, he pulled out three things, first a syringe full of bubbly green liquid, a strange metal brace and...a bento box.
Inside the bento box was a whole range of delicious looking sushi.
Wrapped neatly in crisp looking seaweed, the rice was fresh, and on top were some delicious looking furikake.
On one piece of sushi, there was smoked salmon, on another, a thin layer of raw tuna.
All the ingredients for a delicious dinner.
There was even a hot cup of green tea.
Simon, behind the cover of the curtains, gently shook Tanaka awake, and immediately covered his mouth with a big, strong hand.
Simon then got the syringe of bubbly green liquid- drain cleaner, and plunged it straight into Tanaka's neck, around the larynx.
Trying to scream, but unable to, due to the hand covering his mouth, Tanaka felt a searing hot pain as the drain cleaner burnt out his vocal chords, rendering him literally speechless.
Simon spoke at the teen, wide scared-shitless eyes looking back at him.
"OK, my friend, we are going to eat some sushi, Russia Sushi, to be precise."
Tanaka's eyes relaxed a little as Simon brought out the bento box full of sushi.
"But first, we're going to use this." He lifted the metal brace into view.
Tanaka's eyes widened, again.
"After all, it's very rude to spit out food when you've been invited."
Simon came around to the side of the bed and fitted Tanaka's bottom jaw into the harness, then fitted the top lip into it, did some tweaking and then pulled a lever and stuck it in place.
As a result, Tanaka's jaws were open wide, unable to be closed.
Tanaka was really, really frightened, so scared, in fact, that his eyes rolled back into his head, and he fainted.
"Oh, no you don't" Simon said, a smile of pure glee spreading on his face.
He lifted up the section of the briefcase to reveal 5 other syringes, full of blue liquid.
He took one of these, grabbed Tanaka's non-crippled arm and stuck the syringe in, the needle going in deep.
Tanaka gasped and sat up, then silently coughed, his vocal chords gone.
"Adrenaline is a personal favourite of mine" Simon said, winking at Tanaka.
"In Russia, we would use it to revive fallen comrades"
Tanaka was still frightened, his eyes looking over the contraption that held his mouth open.
"Now, as I was saying, before you rudely fainted," Simon said,
"Let's eat some sushi."
Relieved, but still scared, Tanaka relaxed a little as Simon, one again brought out the bento box, a huge grin on his face.
"I like the Raw Tuna Special" said Simon, and dropped the sushi into Tanaka's mouth.
This is where the contraption came into play, Simon grabbed a little lever on the side and moved it up and down, it opened and closed Tanaka's mouth, forcing him to chew.
As soon as Tanaka took his first bite, his face turned to horror, and then disgust.
That wasn't tuna!
But Tanaka was forced to continue to chew as blood squirted from the pseudo-tuna.
Simon laughed.
"Oh, I'm sorry, did I say tuna? I meant tumor, and a malinant one at that."
Tanaka fainted again, and the sushi slid down his throat, This was going to be over too quickly!
Simon quickly grabbed another syringe of adrenaline and quickly inserted it into the same pinprick on Tanaka's arm
The sushi flew out of his mouth as the adrenaline kicked in, again.
"Ah, good, we have so much more to eat," said Simon.
"Are you ready?" He asked.
Tanaka vigorously shook his head in response,
"Ah, good, let's try this yummy looking rice ball, then."
Simon extracted from the bento box a rice ball which he promptly dropped down the back of Tanaka's throat, again.
The process was repeated to simulate eating, but was stopped midway when a trickle of blood ran out of the side of Tanaka's mouth.
Opening the jaws, again, there was now a sewing needle through Tanaka's tongue.
Tanaka was crying silent tears, his nose was dribbling down his face.
"Ooh, woops, what's that?" Simon said in mock horror.
He then reached in and pulled out the needle, and put it on the table next to the hospital bed.
Simon checked his watch, it was nearly 10pm, he had been in the room for 2 hours!
"Well, my friend, let us get through the rest of this quickly, as I must be going."
Simon said, then quickly moved through the next three items, which were:
Sushi(the seaweed was actually poison ivy leaves)
More sushi (the furikake was actually tiny little rose thorns)
and sushi with caviar (the caviar was covered in arsenic)
Tanaka lay there, he felt blood in his mouth, mostly made by tiny little thorns, the back of his throat hurt, from the rose thorns, and his tummy wasn't feeling very good, that was probably the arsenic.
Simon spoke.
"OK! now that we're done, some tea is always good!"
Without further ado, Simon picked up the container of "tea" and poured it straight to the back of Tanaka's throat.
There was some truth in the fact that the tea was tea, it was green tea, in fact.
The real problem lay in that it was 5% green tea and 95% drain cleaner.
Tanaka was dead in 10 seconds.
The drain cleaner ate through the back of his throat, then the spinal cord, making him a quadriplegic, then the residue ate into his brain stem, killing him instantly...
Simon was gone before the morning.
EPILOGUE
The police scoured the premises for any clues, but they found none.
The coroner walked in,
"What have we got, Jonesy?"
"Well, sir, one 19 year old, male, severe blood loss in the mouth, a large hole in the back of the throat, with some dissolved lino underneath."
"Aha"
"Uhh, sir, we also found this."
The policeman, Jonesy, held up a bento box.