My sister, my best friend

By: Twilight Always

I couldn't let them know I was here; Vernon hated magic, just like I did if not more. He didn't understand though, he couldn't grasp after all these years that she was still my sister, she was my best friend. He couldn't, and wouldn't ever understand what Lily meant to me, and I didn't expect him to understand, I mean, of years of insulting her, and speaking about her as if she was dirt beneath my feet, of course he wouldn't understand. As I walked forward, toward my sister's fate, my legs were shaky and I felt my stomach doing flip flops. I was nervous, even now, I was scared. I closed my eyes, and fell down to my knees, not caring that the dirt on the ground dirtied my long skirt. It didn't matter . . . nothing seemed to matter anymore. I closed my eyes tight, not wanting to face to truth, the cold, hurtful truth. I slowly opened my eyes to face the cold grey engraved stone. . .

R.I.P

Lily Elizabeth Potter

1960 - 1981

Beloved Mother,

Wife, Friend, and Sister.

A silent tear ran down my face as I finished reading the engraving on my dead little sister's grave. So this was her fate, this is what it came to. I ran my index finger over each letter, as the tears continued to flow. I was tired of hiding and holding back the tears. I was sick and tired of pretending to not care, I was sick of having a mask on my face, a mask of indifference, and lies, never showing the real pain and betrayal in my face, and my eyes, I guess after years of hiding my feelings, I got really good at it. I just didn't want to do it anymore. . .

I had never believed in talking to graves, as if whoever you're speaking to can really hear you. But now, as I kneeled before her grave, I wanted to believe, no. . . . I needed to believe, so I talked, and I said what's been on my mind since Lily became a witch.

"Lily, My dear Lily, I'm so sorry, I'm sorry for everything I did, oh my gosh Lily, I can't describe how sorry I am" I choked out between my sobs. "Lily, Lily, Lily, I hope you can hear me, I hope you know how sorry I am, and I wouldn't blame you for not forgiving me, I was horrible to you, I was so horrible to you, my own sister!" I said, closing my eyes and talking deep breaths. "You know Lily, I never thought that it would come to this, It wasn't supposed to be like this, you weren't supposed to die, why did you have to die! It's not fair! I've lost you completely now, I don't know what to do Lily, you were always stronger than me, you were always better than me at everything, why did you have to die Lily? its not fair . . ." my full of emotioned voice trailed off. I don't think my voice has ever had so much emotion in it, I don't think I've ever hurt so much in all my years. "I don't know why I was so cruel to you Lily, I. . .I know I was jealous, and its taken me years to admit it, but I was so jealous, I was jealous that you were a witch, that you had this whole new life. . .and I just didn't seem to fit anymore. I know you still loved me, but I thought magic took my place, that I was just there, not as important as I once was to you . . ." I said pathetically, my voice was cracking and my throat soar from crying. "Harry was brought to my house, after you and your husband died. I. . . I heard you had a child, I wish I was there for the wedding, and I wish I had been there for you through your pregnancy" I took a breath before continuing, "you know . . . he has your eyes, Harry does, exactly your eyes, sometimes I can't even stand to look into those eyes, its like they're searching my soul, like they know something, and it rips my heart apart Lily! Oh Lord Lily, history repeats itself with me and him, he just turned eleven, and he got his Hogwarts letter, I'm so cruel to him Lily but. . ." I took another deep inhaling breath before saying the reason for my coldness towards my own nephew, "I can't get close to him Lily, I just. . . I can't, because if I get close to him . . . I could lose him exactly like I lost you, and I just can't let that happen again Lily" I sighed a sad tragic sigh. "he looks like your husband . . . James" I said sighing once again. I had only meet James Potter once, my eyes drifted to the grave beside Lily's that I hadn't even acknowledged yet. . .

R.I.P

James

1960-1981

Beloved Father,

Husband, and Friend.

"James, you know you made her so happy, happier then my husband and me ever were" I said laughing lightly, though there was no humor in the laugh. "I remember her coming home from Hogwarts for Christmas or summer vacation, and she would always talk about you . . .but in those first years it wasn't good things, she would say you were a toe rag, and you were a dumb prankster always trying to get her to go out with her" I laughed, looking back on the memories, "but things changed, in sixth year, she came home for summer break and whenever the name "James" was mentioned on T.V. or if she heard it on the streets, or even if my parents would ask about you and if you were still bugging her, and she would blush! at the mere mention of your name she would blush!" I said laughing lightly and quietly. "Even though we were fighting, and we didn't talk about things like boys, or anything other than shooting insults at each other, I could see that she loved you, it was clear in her eyes, she's my sister, I knew these things" I coughed, clearing my throat. My voice was worn out now, like my soul felt. Worn out, and in pain. "You should both be proud of Harry, I don't say it to him, even though I should, he is a good kid. He has so much potential. His smart Lily, like you, and he has such a big heart, again, like you, but there's more, he seems like a bit of a trouble maker, and I know that didn't come from you Lils, so it must have come from James" I said laughing, "Lily said you were a trouble maker in school" I said laughing, remembering when Lily would complain to my parents about all the pranks that James Potter and his friends played. Even though I pretended to hate her, I wanted to know about her life, what she was doing in that magic school . . . her new friends along with it. I wiped the tears that were still continuing to fall from my face and turned back to Lily's grave stone. I stood up from the ground, brushing the dirt of my knees. I put a hand on James grave "I'm sorry I didn't get to know you James" I said sadly, and gently put one single red tulip in front of the grave stone. I took another choking breath and turned my attention again to my sister's head stone. I put a red tulip in front of her grave, leaned down and pressed a light kiss to the top of the grave stone. Then, I said the last thing, the truest thing that I've said in years, it wasn't to long, but it had so much truth, and meaning in it. Dear Lily, I hope you're listening.

"I miss you Lily, there's not much more to say then that, I miss you. I miss your laugh, your smile, your heart, your soul, I miss everything about you! I miss my sister . . . I miss my best friend"

With that, I turned and walked away from Lily and James Potter's graves, hoping with everything in me that Lily had listened to me, and that she forgave me. My sister, my best friend, I love you.

Authors Note!

Hey all my lovely readers =) I hope you liked this one-shot, I realized as I wrote this that all of the stories that I have on here are heartbreakers, so I really need to get cracking on at least one good ending one. But what can I say, I love writing those fanfics that make people cry. =) Yah, I'm a fan of heartbreaker fanfics. But I will soon get on some non-sad fanfics. I hope you all liked it! Please Review! I love getting reviews! I do want to be a writer when I'm older, so getting good reviews inspires me and always puts a smile on my face. =) Thanks for reading! now review! I know you want to ; )