ShinRa Dogcatchers

A Companion Piece to AmazonTurk's "Operation: Assassination" by Serenity-chan

The barking was getting louder and louder and a couple of cats could be heard in there, as well as something that didn't quite sound entirely animal. A couple of men off the street had been called upon to help break up the maelstrom of mammals mucking up the main sidewalk of Midgar. One of them had already sustained a serious bite on his hand from a large dog that looked like a cross between a Great Pyrenees and Red XIII. Another man had been caught in the middle of the chaos and had been bitten on the shoulder by what was not so much a dog as a rat with long legs. And the damned Chihuahua wouldn't let the fuck go! Soon, three other dogs had set on him - a retriever of some sort, a terrier not matching any breed description, and a Heinz-57 mutt that could have been anything and come from anywhere. A young policewoman was trying to dislodge a Jack Russell from her pant leg without hurting the dog. One of the cats in the mix clawed its way up a tree and launched at the first man's head.

"Okay! This is too much!" yelled the policewoman, dragging the terrier with her and throwing up her hands in a combination of exasperation and exhaustion. "I'm calling ShinRa."

"They have an animal control service?" asked the man who had been bitten first and was now trying to dodge a very angry cat who had indeed launched out of the tree.

The young policewoman shrugged.

"Well they've got everything else, don't they?" she asked rhetorically. "Anyway... It's our best bet."

The second man approached the policewoman angrily, scattering the three dogs that had set on him as the Chihuahua finally detached from his shoulder - he was apparently the resident here.

"If you people would do your jobs, we would have packs of wild animals roaming through Midgar!" he snarled loudly at her, sounding quite a bit like some of his four-footed adversaries, as he hauled a rather impressive shotgun over his shoulder. "I say just shoot 'em and be done with it!"

Sighing and trying to keep her cool, the policewoman shook her head.

"Not in a residential area, sir," she grated out - this man was the type who got on her nerves very quickly.

The policewoman whipped out a cell phone and punched in a three-digit number. Raising the apparatus to her ear, she continued watching the dogs back the humans away from them. Several more men had come in off the streets at hearing and seeing the chaos. One man was actually locked in a wrestling match with a big boarhound - between a six-foot-three construction worker and the boarhound, the dog was winning. Another man, this one built medium-height and wiry as a lightweight boxer, was playing chicken with... a Boxer named Hunter. The policewoman recognized this one as a friend of a family pet - her cousin Yolande's Schnoodle, Becca, had wound up having puppies with this dog. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed the homeowner aiming his shotgun. She snapped her phone closed without waiting for it to pick up and went to deal with the situation.

"HEY! Not only is this a residential area, but I can guarantee you at least one of those animals is a family pet listed on the ShinRa registry," she yelled angrily, putting a firm hand on his shoulder. "You'll have property damage charges on you on top of the 'discharging a weapon in a residential area' that I'd slap on your ass quicker than you can say 'dogcatcher'!"

Growling obscenities under his breath, the homeowner lowered his gun. The policewoman opened her phone again and punched in the same three-digit number. She waited a moment and a male voice answered the phone with the normal "You have contacted the ShinRa Building in upper Midgar, to which department should I connect you?" speech. After a short description of the situation, the young policewoman put in her request for the Animal Control department. The crisp, polite male voice on the other end affirmed her choice and asked her to hold. Gods, these ShinRa people have good taste in music! she thought as the song "My Girl" played as 'hold, please' music. There was a crackling noise on the other end of the line, interrupting the heavenly sounds of the Temptations, then another voice, this one female, picked up.

"Good afternoon, you have contacted ShinRa Animal Control Services," the female voice, just as polite and crisp as the male one before it, rattled off. "My name is Brandi - how may I help you?"

The young policewoman pinched the bridge of her nose - this crisp politeness made her want to hit people since she didn't need formalities, she needed something DONE!

"Uh, hi... This is Officer Olivia Brighton with Upper Midgar Precint 7... ow!" she began, wincing as the OTHER cat from the melee decided now would be a good time to bite her ankle. "There's a bit of a disturbance involving a pack of dogs, a couple of cats, and a rowdy homeowner on 52nd street."

There was a musical laugh from Brandi's end of the line.

"I'm afraid there isn't much we can do about rowdy homeowners," she said politely - Officer Brighton wanted to scream at her. "But we can send someone over to deal with the animals. Can you give us a number on how many animals are involved?"

Officer Brighton made a quick glance around at the bevy of beasts in the brawl before her, trying rather unsuccessfully to count just how many furry bodies were moving around.

"Um... My closest guess is about ten dogs and two cats," she said with almost-certainty. "Yeah, that seems about right."

"That's ten dogs and two cats?" Brandi asked - Officer Brighton confirmed, nodding unneccessarily. "Okay, Officer Brighton, someone should be there in about ten minutes."

Officer Brighton wanted to snarl at the woman on the other end of the line but thought better of it, thanked Brandi, and hung up her cell phone. There were now six grown men trying to fight ten dogs and two cats. Officer Brighton had initially just been irritated when she was called on to do something about the dogs, but now what was going on seemed unusual. Dogs of varying sizes were fighting grown men and winning - even the cats were holding their own. There was definite teamwork going on - not something usually seen in a dogfight and certainly not with cats. Watching the fight carefully, Officer Brighton noticed another individual - a human girl.

The girl was quite petite and looked like she was about sixteen, wearing black pants, a black tank top, and Converse high-top shoes. She wore a small hoop earring in her left ear, two thick chains hung around her neck and she wore two rings on her wedding finger on her left hand. A curtain of straggly, wavy sable hair hung down her back, and self-cut, mostly-grown-out bangs partially obscured her face. She was dodging in and out in a three-way tag-team between the Great Pyrenees/Red XIII cross and a dog even bigger that looked like it was more Dire wolf than dog. Officer Brighton's jaw dropped, as did everyone else's present, as the girl leapt onto the Dire-dog's back and did a loop around the melee, drawing the fight tighter. The construction worker and the boarhound were cut out, excluded from the larger fight.

As the Dire-dog came to a halt and the girl jumped off its back, landing in an almost-graceful crouch - like a cheerleader who hadn't quite practiced enough, the Great XIII, as Officer Brighton had dubbed it, circled around to join in. The boarhound had the construction worker pinned, but instead of going for the throat, he just held the man where he was. Growling something that seemed to be halfway in human language, half something else, the girl called the dog off. Still baring a rather formidable set of teeth, the boarhound stepped off the man. It, the Great XIII and the Dire-dog slunk back and stood their ground at the girl's direction - their positions formed an isoscles triangle around the man. The Dire-dog was at the apex, the shortest distance from the man, with the Great XIII and the boarhound equidistant from and lined up with each other. With the girl standing in position, they formed a rhombus. The other seven dogs were still fighting five grown men and still winning.

Officer Brighton had watched this whole performance in confusion, awe, and a twinge of fear - theories were spinning through her head, each more unlikely than the last. Where had the girl come from and why hadn't anyone seen her in the fight before? Was she a werewolf or something? No, that's just silly, the officer told herself - werewolves were just in stories and movies and costumes at Sinister Season. Then... if that was the case, the girl had to be down on the animals' level... What the hell did that mean? And how was it that the dogs were fighting in an organized manner? It was like they were taking direction from someone - it was obvious that the girl was doing it... But... how!? The young policewoman stumbled over her own brain when she came to the wildest conclusion of all - maybe this girl could talk to animals!?

"Stay..."

The first coherent word the young officer had heard the girl use - she had nodded to the boarhound and the Great XIII and was re-taking her place on the Dire-dog's back. Her voice was low and hoarse - probably from a combination of disuse and all that growling. With that, she turned the Dire-dog - Officer Brighton was at a loss to how, considering she didn't say another word or touch the dog at all - and headed back into the fracas. This time she was going after the wiry guy who was still playing chicken with the Boxer - the man was fighting a dog less than half his size and coming off all the worse from it. Officer Brighton checked her watch - the ShinRa animal control people should be here any minute, she thought to herself. The animal-girl was repeatedly cutting back and forth across the fight, trying to separate out the man and the Boxer without separating them.

Staying firmly in their positions, the Great XIII and the boarhound were keeping the construction worker where he was with stares and growls normally associated with Border Collies. Officer Brighton's mind was spinning with a million questions, the most prominent of those being "What would be the ethical way to get a laboratory to look at this girl?" Normally she was against any kind of creature-based invasive research, but this girl's abilities could be used for the greater good. But how was she to go about doing that in a safe, sane, ethical manner? Should she try to get through at ShinRa again? Well, she thought as a howl rang out, the first thing to do is get hold of her and see what the hell is going on. The girl might have family looking for her or something like that.

She heard a truck pull up and watched a couple of ShinRa animal control officers hop out - their faces immediately twisted in confusion, the same as hers had first been. It was probably doubly confusing to them, being able to see the girl right off - they had to draw their conclusions quickly. One conclusion, as she observed the man who had been driving the truck, was "call for backup - NOW!" The woman who had accompanied the man pulled a catch-pole out of the back of the truck and advanced on the second cat - the one who had bitten Officer Brighton. A short, roaring shout of "HAH!" rang out over all and the girl riding the Dire-dog stood up on her friend's back and he stopped suddenly. The resulting momentum launched her into the air directly AT the female animal control officer, landing her between the officer and the cat.

"Get away..." the girl growled threateningly, gripping the end of the catch-pole.

The animal control officer, a burly woman in her forties, held fast, trying to shake the girl off - rolling with the momentum, the girl let herself be thrown to the ground. Her grip held fast as the large woman shook the catch-pole back and forth, muttering obscenities. No matter what she did, the girl just would NOT let go - her grip was like a bulldog's teeth and she had the upper body strength to match it. How does such a little girl have that much fight in her - and even if she has the spirit, how does she have the pure strength to USE it!? ran the thought in everyone's heads. The large woman was jerking and twisting the pole as viciously as she could, scraping the girl over the ground, but it wasn't working. Another deep, threatening growl escaped the girl's throat and someone yelled "For the love of Odin, Janice - let go!" Not giving up just yet, Janice took one last stab at it, this time pushing the girl with the pole instead of trying to pull it from her - the move pinned her against the curb.

At a rather disturbing, hair-raising, blood-chilling "rrrrreeeOW!" sound from the girl, the cat - who had crouched back defensively, ready to help her friend - dashed back into the chaos. The Chihuahua who had been attached to the shotgun-wielding homeowner ran along beside her as a guide. Its companions - the retriever, the terrier, and the Heinz-57 - were now triple-tag-teaming one of the two remaining men. He was a well-known jogger in the area - a triathlon runner, actually - and he was clearly embarrassed to be losing to a bunch of dogs. The remaining dogs - the Jack Russell who had been savaging Officer Brighton's pants and a gigantic St. Bernard - were double-teaming... a transsexual postal worker. Officer Brighton stepped back with a look that said "Now I've seen everything".

The girl, pinned on the curb still, was wriggling with everything she had as the man who had driven the animal control truck and the four officers from the other two approached her. Maybe everything would start dying down now, everyone thought - but they were wrong. The Dire-dog slammed Janice from the side, knocking the pole from her hands and freeing the girl, who launched at the larger woman with fingernails unnaturally long. The remaining five animal control officers raced back to their trucks to grab catch-poles of their own, figuring the girl couldn't possibly fight all of them at once. However, the girl had no trouble incapacitating Janice with a solid bite on the kneecap, ripping the woman's khaki pants and bloodying them. The large woman scrambled back to her truck. The animal-girl was back with the Dire-dog, riding through the fight and whooping and howling encouragements to her friends.

One man was coming at the Chihuaha and two were approaching the Jack Russell, all of them wielding catch-poles, knowing that the girl couldn't possibly go after both of them. The Chihuahua and the Jack Russell were on opposite ends of the fight - she couldn't be in two places at once. To make doubly sure, the remaining two men were running after the Dire-dog and brandishing catch-poles at the girl herself, trying to keep her busy. She let loose a loud whistle through her fingers and the Great XIII and the boarhound both charged at the construction worker. However, it was only the boarhound who made contact, just knocking the man over and holding him down. The Great XIII dodged AROUND the man at the last second, skirting in behind the Dire-dog, the girl, and their pursuers.

With a burst of speed, he was hot on one man's heels and with a flying leap, he was on top of the man, breaking the plastic pipe that housed the catch-loop and rendering it useless. Now that the first man was disarmed and on the ground, the Great XIII continued on with insane endurance. He was quickly gaining on the second man, but this man had been a quarterback in high school, big and strong, but also quick on his feet and good at maneuvering. The man spun on his heel and with a quick motion, catch-looped the Great XIII. There was a yell of "YAH!" from the girl and the Dire-dog did a tight circle, barrelling back and knocking him bodily off the ground. His grip detached on impact and, without missing a beat, the girl was down off the Dire-dog - running beside him, had the catchpole off her friend, and broke it smartly against a curb. Without even breaking her stride, the animal-girl vaulted back up on the Dire-dog's back.

A string of short, harsh barks - marching orders - and the Great XIII raced off towards the man approaching the Chihuahua. The little dog's cat friend was trying to get into position to claw her way up the man's leg. As the giant red-and-cream dog raced past him, the wiry man fighting the Boxer took off running away from the chaos. At this point, he didn't care if he was a chicken. The Boxer lifted his head and stood triumphant for a moment, then sprinted off as fast as he could after the Dire-dog. His long, thin, brindled legs moved fast and in strides so sharp and precise that he could have passed for a champion racer. The girl directed her packmates towards the two men who were playing a good game of cat-and-mouse with the Jack Russell. They, the men, might have had the advantage of reach and size, but the plucky dog had lightning-quick reflexes and an uncanny ability to predict their movements. However, this didn't change the fact that he was on the defensive side.

The yell of "HAH!" rang out again and the girl launched off her friend's back, landing beside her little friend - however, this time the Dire-dog didn't stop to help her launch. He kept on going, circling around the two men to keep them from going anywhere or threatening the rest of the pack. The two men were indeed cornered - they couldn't move back or they'd hit the Dire-dog, but moving forward, they dealt with Scrappy Jack and the animal-girl with claws bared. Growling again, the girl flexed her hands, displaying her claws fully - sharp and half an inch long.

"Two on one ain't fair..." she snarled in that low, hoarse voice.

With a roar, she launched at one man, letting the Dire-dog handle the other one and giving Scrappy Jack time to get away.

"SHIT!" yelled the man hit by the Dire-dog, scrambling back away from the maelstrom. "SOMEBODY CALL SHINRA BACK! We canNOT handle this!"

Officer Brighton, who had been warning people away from the fight, pulled out her cell phone and let her partner take over crowd control, quickly punching in the three-digit code.

"You have contacted the ShinRa Building in upper Midgar, to which department should I connect you?" rattled the polite, crisp male voice again.

The young policewoman decided against the profanity-laced diatribe she longed to throw at the man on the other end of that phone.

"Yes, this is Officer Victoria Brighton with Upper Midgar Precinct 7," she rattled back out of policy. "I'm calling back about the disturbance on 52nd Street. ShinRa Animal Control Services is in need of urgent assistance. The strongest you've got."

"Officer, that would be Tseng's office with the Turks," the male voice said with polite apprehension. "Are you absolutely certain this is whom you wish to contact?"

Officer Brighton once more nodded unneccessarily as she gave an emphatic and authoritative "YES!"

"One moment please, Officer Brighton," said the Voice - this time the 'hold, please' music was the Drifters singing 'Save the Last Dance for Me'. "Someone will be right with you."

There was another pause, then some static, and then a click.

"Good afternoon, you've reached the office of the Turks of ShinRa," said the once-again-far-too-sickeningly-polite voice of a young female. "Whom do you wish to speak to and who may I say is calling?"

Resisting the urge to reach through the phone and strangle this woman, Officer Brighton cleared her throat.

"This is Officer Victoria Brighton, Upper Midgar Precinct 7," she said again. "There is a disturbance on 52nd Street that has gotten too far out of hand for local enforcement. We need the strongest assistance we can get."

The young woman on the other end must have sensed Officer Brighton's urgency through her formal tone.

"Patching through to Senior Turk," she said quickly.

There was another insane pause, then static and a click.

"Office of Senior Turk, Tseng speaking," came the smooth, professional voice of ShinRa's finest.

Before even waiting for the rest of the speech she was sure was coming, Officer Brighton launched off into the situation.

"We've got a crapton of wild animals and crazy girl over here on 52nd Street... No, sir... We just can't get them under control... Yes, sir... They've beaten down six grown men, five male animal control officers and Janice... Yes, that Janice..."

Tseng was staring at his phone, which Reno had pressed the 'speaker' button for, since everyone in the office could already hear the officer yelling into the phone. The redhead figured they could at least get some real entertainment out of this whole little brou-haha. His interest was sparked at this - his specialty was the unusual situations, so he figured he was about to get sent out and it was best to know one's enemy. Rude sat quietly at his desk, tapping into the call with Kandi by his side - they both knew Reno would be dragging them along. Tseng's face was the picture of confusion and disbelief - packs of wild animals and a wolf-girl running loose in upper Midgar? What in the hell was going on!? He cut in on the officer's increasing hysterics with his smooth voice.

"Yes, Officer, I have the perfect man for the job... I assure you, it will only take him. He'll bring his partner anyway, just in case... Officer, I really must insist that you calm down - it's becoming impossible to understand you... Ah, I see - that was the wolf-girl... Yes, Officer, someone will be right there..."

The Wutaian man pinched the bridge of his nose as he picked up the reciever of the phone and set it down heavily on the 'disconnect' button. He looked up at the red-haired man sitting casually on his desk with his feet propped on the nearest chair. With a grin, the redhead gave his boss a reprieve, saying "Way ahead of you, Bossman!" as he swung his legs down and jumped to his feet. He yelled for his partner as he strode past the bald man's desk - Rude winced at the noice then got up in silence and Kandi along with him. Tseng nodded rather wearily as Reno called "52nd Street, right Boss?" and ambled out of the room. The Wutaian man hit a specially-labeled button on his phone's intercom and perked up as a light female voice inquired "Is something wrong, sir?"

"Elena, I have a migraine coming on..." he said tiredly.

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It was nowhere near too soon when the shiny black Land Rover pulled up at the cordoned-off intersection at 52nd street and braked. The transsexual postal worker had taken off running, looking like a cross between Angel from RENT and Captain Jack Sparrow. A satisfied shnuff noise escaped the huge St. Bernard and he planted his enormous rear on the ground, daring anyone else to get anywhere near him. This dog weighed close to 300 pounds and he knew for sure and certain that NO ONE was going to fuck with him. Finally leaving his pride behind, the construction worker turned tail and ran away, screaming like a little girl. The boarhound went to join the St. Bernard, forming a thick barrier of muscle between a couple of the animal control officers and the smaller dogs - the terrier mix, Scrappy Jack, and the little Chihuahua now dubbed the Hell Rat. The triathlete jogger was still being held at bay by the retriever mix and the Heinz-57. Finally, he figured at better use of his speed would be doing the same as the construction worker and running away. The two cats chased him a little ways, then doubled back to hover around the Heinz-57.

Now the big part of the fight was between the three remaining male animal control officers, the animal-girl, the Great XIII and the Dire-dog. Only one of the men had a working catch-pole and he was working on trying to corral one of the dogs long enough to loop it. The only problem was that the Great XIII had the dexterity of a herding dog and so was able to dodge the catch-loop easily and the Dire-dog was the size of a large Shetland pony with twice the strength. Plus, with the way the both of them were crisscrossing all over the place, it was impossible to get a handle on just one dog. The other two officers were attempting to use their broken catch-poles as weapons against the animal-girl. What was odd was that she was on the offensive more often than not. The Boxer was now circling the group, acting like a sweeper in a soccer game, keeping the offense and the defense in their places. Standing there the whole time and now - because of the crowd - out of Officer Brighton's sight, was the homeowner.

The three Turks delivered to the scene had tumbled out of the Land Rover with the usual amount of festivity - Reno getting his hair tangled in his seatbelt as usual and Rude forgetting the E-brake and Kandi screaming at the Rover's lurch. The three of them together ambled over to the chaos, assessing the situation from a distance first. It was like facing down a herd of angry Chocobos, except these had teeth. The muscles of the group - the St. Bernard, the boarhound, and now the retriever mix, still formed their barrier. Behind them, the terrier mix, Scrappy Jack, and the Hell Rat, growled menacingly, baring their little teeth as though they were all the size of Rottweilers. The two cats flanked the St. Bernard, knowing nothing was going to bother them if they stayed where they were. Reno's eyes were the first to go buggy, Rude shook his head and blinked behind his shades, and Kandi tilted her head at the last remaining fighters - that was a GIRL in there!

"So... who wants to do what, yo?" Reno asked, half casually and half nervously.

"You're the specialist in unusual situations," Kandi shot back. "So it's up to you, Mr. Expert."

Rude stayed silent, watching the battle - that girl was good - and Reno threw up his hands.

"Hey, I'm genuinely stumped by this one, yo!" yelled the redhead. "I thought animal control would at least have been able to take one or two of the dogs down. Do you see that giant-ass motherfucker!? He probably outweighs the three of us! No way in hell am I takin' on that joker, yo!"

He had been referring to the St. Bernard, who shnuffed again - then Rude spoke up in his quiet way...

"Hang on..." he said in a low voice, eyeing the homeowner. "What's that guy do---"

There was a noise like small explosion and two simultaneous deep yelps of pain - everyone present screamed and looked around for the damage. Standing there with his freshly-discharged weapon was the homeowner, gritting his teeth and looking pointedly nervous now. He had been aiming directly at the girl, figuring she was some kind of witch and getting rid of her would turn the dogs and cats back into normal animals and make it easier for animal control to deal with. The girl had been clear in his line of fire, her back to him and nothing blocking her. However... it was the Great XIII and the Dire-dog who had been hit by the dispersing shrapnel from inside the shotgun slug. Both of them had been directly in front of her - had the shrapnel somehow arced around her? By all rights, her back and chest should have been riddled! Both giant dogs fell and the girl fell on her knees beside them.

"You bastard!" screamed Officer Brighton. "What did I tell you about discharging a weapon in a residential area!?"

She charged over to the man, cuffed him, and was reading him his rights faster than anyone could say 'boo'. The crowd milling around wasn't sure who to turn its support to now. Wasn't the girl the 'bad guy' in all of this? Well, the homeowner certainly looked like the bad guy now. No matter what she was doing, it seemed excessive to open fire on a teenager and a pack of dogs. The "muscle wall" was shifting over towards their fallen friends - since the shrapnel had been so dispersed, it hadn't hit any vital areas on the giant dogs, but they were still in a lot of pain. With the girl on her knees, the three animal control officers closed in on her. None of the "muscle" dogs had the dexterity or speed to avoid them, but they did all they could do, which was place themselves between the enemy and their friends. The girl reached one skinny hand out and touched the St. Bernard's giant head.

"Enough..." she told her friends in that low voice of hers, her head bowing over in total defeat.

When one man's hand reached over the St. Bernard - who growled threateningly - touched her shoulder, quick as a flash - as if out of reflex - she caught it, sinking all ten claws and as many teeth as possible into his wrist. Her fallen friends crawled closer to her, still trying to protect her. The "light brigade" - the terrier mix, Scrappy Jack, and Hell Rat - curled up as small as they could around her knees. Slowly coming to a halt, the Boxer came and rested his big, square head on the girl's opposite shoulder and the Heinz-57 let out a low whine as he came to sit with his wide, shaggy chest against her back. Both cats slunk out from behind the St. Bernard's legs to come and sit in their friend's lap. Still as fierce and elegant as ever, the boarhound sat gracefully beside his pack leader and licked her left ear. The other two men - ie, the ones not being bitten - produced the last working catch-poles, preparing to take the dogs away.

"See that those monsters are destroyed! All of them!" yelled the homeowner as he was being shoved into Officer Brighton's police cruiser.

Janice called back an affirmative reply.

"Well..." Reno said apprehensively. "Looks like they didn't need us after all..."

Swallowing hard, he turned to walk away but a strong hand caught his arm - he turned around to see not Rude, but Kandi with a deathgrip on his elbow.

"This is wrong and you know it..." she snarled at him. "Somebody has to help that girl."

Rude swallowed hard as well and looked down at his girlfriend.

"Kandi... you know it's not Turk business to---" he cut off, not sure how to say this without sounding totally heartless.

Reno, unfortunately, was used to being heartless when he had to be.

"C'mon, this paperwork's gonna be a bitch already," he said in a hard voice.

Kandi let go of his arm as if dropping a poisonous spider and kicked him hard in the shins before turning on her heel and heading over towards the gathering of dogs and cats. The "light brigade" and the cats had been taken already and were being loaded into the first truck as the Heinz-57 whined and struggled against his catch-loop. The boarhound was growling low and threatening as he was restrained with a muzzle. A perfect tribute to his breeding, the retriever mix went with only minimal fuss, looking back sadly at his friends. The Boxer was resisting spectacularly, pulling at his catch-loop until he couldn't breathe - he was finally just restrained on people-power and loaded up. Finally left were the giants - the St. Bernard refused to leave his friend's side and there wasn't much that was moving a near-300-pound-dog. The fallen duo were probably just going to be left where they were. Kandi marched up to Janice and pointed her standard-issue handgun between the large woman's eyes.

"By order of ShinRa, you people aren't going anywhere until we get a few things ironed out," she ordered.

The burly woman just nodded and motioned to her coworkers to stop all activity - Reno came jogging over, yelling for Kandi to stop what she was doing.

"Go to hell, Reno," Kandi growled back at him, flipping her superior a one-finger salute as she knelt down by the girl's side.

The girl's thin, dirty face was obscured by her straggly waves of sable-brown hair - little sniffling noises let the world know she was crying.

"Hey..." Kandi said softly, figuring now wasn't the best time to touch the girl seeing as the first man had only just prised her teeth and claws out of his wrist. "Everything's gonna be okay, sweetie... We're gonna get everything settled."

Her only response was a combination of a growl and a sniffle.

"Kandi, she probably can't even speak," Reno said, his voice not unkind, but still hard. "I know this is hard for you, but part of being a Turk is knowing that you can't save everyone. There's nothing you can do for her - you have to accept that. And anyway, she doesn't need Turks - she needs mental help."

He was met with a punch to the side of his knee.

"ShinRa has the best mental caregivers on the Planet," Kandi retorted. "But I don't want to see her get lost in the institution system. She needs help."

Reno furrowed his brow in frustration - there was just no getting through to some people the easy way!

"Look! There's some people in this world who are just beyond it!" he yelled, waving his arms. "Some people are just so profoundly out there that there's nothing anybody can do for them! Look at her! She's been living on the streets with a pack of dogs for gods-knows-how-long! She probably thinks she's one of them! Can she speak!? Can she even walk upright!?"

Before Kandi could speak, there was a growling noise.

"I'll thank you not to refer to me as 'she' when I'm sitting right here," snarled the black-clad teenager. "I don't need your godsdamned help. I need my friends."

Reno sighed in frazzlement.

"See! She doesn't want help! She's mental!"

Kandi glared at him.

"You never want help either, Mr. I-Drove-Out-Into-The-Middle-Of-ButtFuckNowhere-Ran-Out-Of-Gas-While-Totally-Lost-And-Was-Missing-For-Three-Full-Days-Because-I-Wouldn't-Ask-For-Godsdamned-Directions!" she spat. "Does that make you a mental case?! To me it says less of 'I'm mental' than 'I'm just too proud to ask for help because I want people to think I can handle myself'."

Rude stepped up behind his partner and put a hand on his shoulder.

"I'm not just agreeing with her because she's my girlfriend," he said quietly.

While the three Turks were preparing to dissolve into an argument, the girl tugged on Reno's pant leg and he looked down to see the most pleading expression in the most startling hazel-green eyes he had ever seen.

"Please... Don't take my friends away..." she begged, one hand still clenched on his pant leg and the other resting on the St. Bernard's head. "They're all I got..."

Reno's shoulders dropped in defeat - damn his complete inability to resist a pair of pretty eyes.

"What's your name anyway?" he asked wearily - he was so going to wind up regretting this.

"Nicole Christine Barsi," the girl replied without hesitation and with pride in her voice as she tossed back that ratty curtain of hair.

The red-haired man was interested already - he looked over his shoulder and yelled at Janice to start unloading those dogs.

"Reno, what are you doing?" Kandi asked in that knowing voice all females can have.

Reno shrugged his shoulders, though it wasn't very clear if he was saying "Whatever" or "I have no fucking clue" - Rude shook his head and Kandi knew those big brown eyes were sparkling with laughter behind the shades.

"You were always a sucker for big pretty eyes," the bald man said, amusement coloring his voice - then he watched the men unloading the dogs from the trucks.

Kandi followed the beshaded gaze.

"Um... Reno? What are we going to do with all these dogs?" she asked.

The redhead shrugged again.

"Figure that out later, I guess," he said dismissively.

Nicole's hazel eyes widened behind her scruffy bangs.

"What's going on?" she asked in bewilderment.

"Hey! Careful with those two! I want them at ShinRa's best vet center!" Reno snapped at the men trying to move the fallen giants - then he turned back to Nicole and gave her a wordless, enigmatic smile.

Kandi smiled as well as she helped the girl off the ground - she could marvel at her lack of injury later.

"Niki-chan, you're coming with us," she said fondly. "Welcome to ShinRa's finest - the Turks are gonna take care of you now."

Reno gravitated over towards the scrappy teenager who looked confused, scared, and ready to punch someone's lights out if they made a sudden move.

"C'mon kiddo, your friends are gonna be okay - everything's taken care of," he told her confidently, draping one long arm around her skinny shoulders - he could feel her shoulder-blades in sharp relief under her skin. "First, we're getting you some real food - I like my girls with some good curves on 'em."

The girl perked up, blushing, as she watched the St. Bernard bound into the passenger seat of the Land Rover, causing the front end of the vehicle to sink visibly. Her face split into a wide grin as she watched Kandi waving her arms and yelling "But I called front seat!" - the dog just shnuffed at her. Reno laughed out loud at his favorite rookie Turk having a very animated argument with a dog three times her size. He guided the teenager along - she still looked so confused - and vaguely hoped Tseng wasn't going to literally have his ass mounted on the wall this time. But then, he could deal with that when it came up - right now, he just had to figure out how to fit ten dogs, most of them massive, two cats, and a potential Turk rookie into one Land Rover. His large, bald partner was bringing up the rear, the Boxer bounding around his heels.

"Gods help us..." muttered Rude.

A/N: Well everybody, this is where we first meet Niki! In the next bit of this two-parter, we're going to see the evaluation that gives her the label everyone is so familiar with - "Clinically Insane". Look for it soon! Now, should I post it as a separate fic or a second chapter on this one? I'm leaning towards separate fic. Don't wanna run too long, y'know?

Reno: No such thing as too long, babe...

Niki: bops Reno with a chocobo plushie
Reno: eyetwitch If you weren't so damn cute when you do that...

Niki: But I am, so that's what matters.