Note : I longed to tell something about Squall's childhood, I just didn't know how… But I got it. I had to take notes of the game, doing twice to get it all! Some parts of this fic are from the game, others from my own twisted mind.
So this is the story of Squall's childhood from his birth to the begining of the game. This story is told by Squall himself, his point of view of everything.
Enjoy ^_~
A SeeD's Memories
Part 1- The Orphanage
I was reluctant about doing this at first, but the others convinced me it could help me see clearer things of my own life. I don't really care... then why am I doing this? Maybe because I want to understand better after all... Whatever...
I can't recall everything, of course. As everybody knows, junctionning GFs makes us lose some of our memories so I required the help of my friends, of Ellone, and even Edea. With their memories put on with mine, I can come up with something.
The best part to start with is my birth. Of course, it's obvious I can't remember anything about it... Ellone told me. She remembered peerfectly every details as though it happened yesterday. That part of her –part of our life- was kept deep in her soul as one of the saddest moment. She said it helped her understand better herself when she finished telling everything. I can still remember the tears in her eyes while she was speaking...
*****
"It's a boy!" the woman said placing the baby in a blanket. "Raine, you have a son!"
"Give him to me..."
Raine weakly took the baby in her arms and looked at the small face. He wasn't crying. She looked at him. He had blue eyes and a little brown hair just like hers.
"Not much of 'him' on that little face..."
"Lemme see! Lemme see!"
"Come closer, Ellone..."
The little brunette hopped as the new mother bent to present her the little thing. Raine gritted her teeth from the pain.
"Little baby, little baby!" Ellone sang. "Cutie!"
Raine moaned, causing the old woman to take back the baby while the young mother laid back on her pillows.
"Raine?" Ellone inquired. "You're hurt?"
Raine gently held her head, giving her a painful smile.
"I'm alright, dear... Now promise me...you'll be his sister...like I'm your mother..."
But it wasn't true, she wasn't alright. There were complications in the delivery. The old woman who helped her give birth to the child was afraid the baby would never come out and die with the mother. Because it was obvious: Raine was going to die. There was no doctor in a small town such as Winhill, and none to be found far away from the place.
Looking sorry, but very serious, the woman came by Raine's side.
"Name the kid, Raine."
Raine had her hair sticking on her face from the sweat.
"Name..."
"Yes, give him a name."
Raine turned her head to the opened window when some wind blew right on her face. She closed her eyes, letting the wind cool up her face a little.
"Squall," she said real low. "The name...is...Squall..."
The she passed away. Ellone jumped on her.
"Raine? No sleep time, Raine! What's wrong, Raine? Raine!!"
Seeing the only mother she had since her parents' death share the same fate, she started crying and yelling at the dead woman.
"Raine! Don't go! You said we'd be a family!"
The elder one felt bad for the kids. The girl lost her parents years ago and Raine took her with her. Now the newborn one was also with no mother. But what about the father? Where was that fool?
She took Ellone's hand to take her out of the room.
"Come, sweetheart. There's nothing more for you to do here."
"No! Leave me here! Raine!"
It was a really sad scene to see. Ellone finally gave up. The old woman gave a last glance on Raine before leaving.
"Raine Leonhart... you would have been a great mother..."
The three left the room.
*****
I didn't tell it as if I was there because I don't think it's apropriate. I can see now that my sad childhood started with my birth. Raine... I never even started to imagine she could have been my mother the first time I saw her as Laguna in the 'Dream World'... then again, I can't even think of Laguna as my father... I think 17 is a bit old to find who my parents are... at least I know who my parents are while my friends don't. I think to much... just stop thinking!
What happened after raine died? The old woman first tried to find someone to keep Ellone and I in Winhill, but there was only old people living there or people who already had kids and couldn't take care of two more. She just couldn't give us up, so she asked her daughter if she knew a place where two children could be well treated. After a while, the daughter found out. The old woman, too old to travel, asked her daughter to take us to that so great looking place. It happened to be an orphanage in a grey stone house somewhere on the Centra continent. Personaly, I wonder how in the world we ended up so far from Winhill! Wasn't there any good place closer? Whatever...
For the next part, I required Ellone's help again along with Edea's. Both memories were almost the same so there was no problem. Incredible considering how young Ellone was and how much time past.
So this part is about our arrival at the orphanage.
*****
Carrying a baby in a bag on her chest, and holding a blue dressed girl's hand, the woman knocked at the wooden door from the stone house. A long black haired woman opened the door, dressed in a long black dress. She had her hands down joined together as she looked at the kids.
"Let me guess," she said in a soft tone. "These kids don't have anymore family and you've been asked to take them here."
The other woman smiled.
"You're just as I was told, Miss Kramer. Is the rumour...true?"
"That I'm a Sorceress? Yes, it's true."
"I can tell from your eyes that you're nothing like that Adel who's so dangerous!"
The black dressed woman bent on Ellone who shyly hid behind the other woman.
"Don't be scared," she said. "I'm not gonna eat you or anything..."
She went back to the baby carrier.
"What is their story?"
"I'm not sure... My mother said she helped the baby's mother give birth to him, but she died right after."
"Poor thing! No father?"
"Nobody knows."
"And the girl?"
"Her parents died long ago and she was taken by the boy's mother."
"So they are some step brother and sister?"
"Kind of..."
"I'll take good care of them..."
She was handed the baby and invited Ellone inside after the other woman thanked her and said goodbye to the little girl. Once the door was closed, the black dressed lady turned to Ellone.
"You don't talk very much, do you?"
Ellone shyly looked away.
"Will I have to call you 'girl'?"
The little one smiled.
"What is your pretty name?"
"...Ellone."
"I was right! Your name is just as pretty as you are!"
Ellone proudly accepted the compliment.
"My name is Edea, the kind woman introduced herself. You can call me Matron."
"Matwyn..."
Edea smiled headed towards a door.
"What do you say about meeting the others?"
Ellone suddenly showed interest.
"You have other kids?"
"They are not mine. They are like you: alone. And I'm taking care of them."
There were some wooden craddles in the room. Edea put the baby in an empty one then turned to Ellone.
"I forgot something important! What is the baby's name? Did her mother have the time to give him one?"
"Squall."
"Like a strong wind... this guy will be very strong..."
Edea was lost in her thoughts a moment then got back to Ellone.
"Do you know when he was born?"
"August 23."
"Just few weeks ago."
A crying sound was heard from one of the craddles. Edea went to take the baby followed by a curious Ellone close behind. Edea showed her the little blond boy she had in her arms.
"This boy was born last december 22. He's almost a year now."
Ellone looked at him and frowned.
"He looks bad!"
The guy started crying again like he understood what Ellone said. Edea giggled and lulled him.
"His name's Seifer Almasy."
When he stopped crying, she put him back and took a look in another. Ellone came to see what it was. Edea signaled her to keep silent.
"This is Quistis. She was born october 4 last year."
"She is older than Seifer, then," Ellone noticed.
"Yes. You're smart."
They left the room.
*****
From then, there isn't much to say for a while. For the first weeks, Edea was always finding Ellone watching over me and sometimes on Quistis and Seifer, but most of the time, she was with me, keeping the promise she made to Raine. Seeing that, Edea was afraid that ellone would only stay around me later and leave the others alone, but everytime either of them was crying, Edea was always finding Ellone close to comfort them.
*****
Few months after Ellone and Squall's arrival, Edea entered the babies' room to find Ellone watching over Squall's craddle as usual. The kind Sorceress walked to her with a smile and signaled her to come out for a little talk. When they were out, Edea crouched down to the little girl's level.
"You probably heard some calls this didn't you child?"
"Yes, Matwyn," Ellone answered with a nod.
"There will soon be some more babies here. I'll need your help to take care of them all. I can be their mother and you can be their big sister. What do you say?"
The brunette frowned and folded her arms.
"I'm Squall's sister."
"Yes, dear, I know taht but you can play the big for the others too. When I'm not around, you'll have to watch them for me, make sure they don't get hurt or that they fight each other. Will you do that for me, my child?"
Ellone thought for a while. She promised Raine she would be Squall's sister, but she never promised not to be sister to someone else.
"Okay, I'll be the big sister."
Edea took the girl's hands and smiled kindly.
"Thanks. That will be of great help to me."
*****
During the next week, Ellone couldn't wait to for the new kids to show up. It was Irvine and Selphie, both coming from the same place the same day? Maybe it fate that those two would end up together...
Sis was very happy. So many kids to take care of, but when she was with one, would I start crying she would automatically be at my side. Dear sis, never forgot her promise.
We were there for a year when the last member of our gang showed up. And if I made myself clear enough, you understand it,s Zell...
*****
Ellone just woke up and went to check up on everybody in the craddles, starting with Squall. She checked on the others, then on Squall again before leaving the room. She went to the front door and opened it, looking at the rising morning. It was fresh outside. The girl listened to the early birds and smiled.
"I'll be able to play outside today! Great!"
She was about to go back in the stone house when she heard a giggle. She spun around and saw a baby about a little more than a year in a basket. It was a little blonde haired boy. Ellone crouched down and read the piece of paper over him. A single word: 'Zell'. Nothing else. Ellone took the basket carefully and carried it inside. Edea was coming out of her bedroom in the meantime. She had her usual calm and kind smile on her face, but when she saw Ellone, she had a frown of curiosity.
"What is it, Ellone?"
"Zell..." she said simply.
Edea walked to her and when she glanced at the basket, she took it from Ellone's hands.
"Not again... I hate it when that happens..."
He wasn't the first kid to be left at the door. Seifer came that way, but there was his full name on a metal necklace plus a letter. But that new blonde guy only had a first name.
"Zell," Edea read.
She closed her eyes and shook her head with a sigh.
"I guess his parents really didn't want him anymore."
Edea walked back inside, Ellone following her. She took the paper and turned it over.
"March 17...must be his birth date."
*****
Okay, maybe that part's confusing. You see, I'm older than Zell. We're both 17, but I had mine first. I was born august 23, Selphie july 16 before me, Irvine, november 24 so he was still very young when he arrived with Selphie. With a full year gone since our arrival, Zell was about half a year when he came in. SO! For the ages: I was 1, Selphie too, Irvine almost, Quistis and Seifer about 2 and sis...she was five or something close to it at least. Hope it's clear now. Let me continue...
*****
Ellone was very excited. Seifer and Quistis were walking by themselves and started to say some words. She tried to teach Squall to walk, but he was still too small so she thought him to speak. He couldn't pronounce her name so she made him call her 'sis'. Then Seifer and Quistis did the same. Selphie was always giggling and Irvine always crying if he wasn't close to her.
Seifer was often asking sis to play, but Quistis was pulling him away, saying she was busy with Squall. Then Seifer go sulk somewhere, saying Squall was stupid. The brown haired boy almost started to cry then, like he understood.
"No, no, Squall," Ellone comforted. "You're not stupid."
Squall stopped crying, sniffing. Ellone frowned and walked to Seifer.
"You're mean!" she said before going back to Squall.
Seifer gave a sorry look and started to cry. Then Quistis did, followed with Irvine and Selphie, then Zell who surprisingly wasn't crying until now. And Squall followed. That crying bunch of babies caused Edea to come in a hurry just when Seifer was running out.
"What's going on?" she asked with concern.
Ellone turned to her with a sorry face like she was on the verge of tears herself.
"I'm sorry, Matwyn!"
Edea smiled comfortingly and directly went to Zell.
"Ellone, please go check on Seifer,"she asked.
"But Squall is..."
"I'll take care of him. Please..."
"Awright..."
She reluctantly left her little brother to go for the hiding blonde boy. She found him outside, just behind the house. He was sitting on the ground, crying. Ellone went to kneel in front of him.
"Sorry, Seifer," she said.
"Yoo hate me, Sis?" he asked looking up.
"No, of course not!"
He sniffed.
"Yoo said I'm mean..."
"Well you're not kind to Squall."
"But yoo like him best."
"He's my little brother, Seifer."
"I'm not Sis' brother?"
"Oh, Seifer..."
*****
Here Ellone stopped, saying she can't remember what she told Seifer after. Or maybe she didn't want to tell what she answered. But she assured her answer got Seifer back in good terms with the others. But when I think about how he turned out towards us, I doubt she got him in any good terms... or maybe it's just with me...
Time past, days, weeks, months... kids came and left but they were not really important so we all forgot about them except for Edea. She never forgot a single kid who came to her home. Seifer started to tease Zell almost all the time. And all the time, Zell cried. Now wonder Seifer always called him a crybaby. In facte, Seifer's favorite victim was Zell, but when he was not around, I was...
*****
Seifer was about four and he was mad that day, really mad. Edea was outside and after a quick search of the house, he guessed Zell also was.
"Hmm..."
Another kid was adopted the previous day. He didn't know him much, but he wanted to be adopted too, to get out of that place. But no one ever came for him. He just couldn't take it anymore.
Then he saw the brown haired boy sitting on the floor of the bedroom, smiling to no one. Seifer frowned with some kind of a grin.
"Squally is a stoopid boy!" he exclaimed.
The younger one lost his smile and looked up.
"Seifer is mean!"
"Know what? Yoo're not Sis' brother!"
"Yes, I'm!"
"No, yoo're not!"
"Yes, I am!"
And the little guy rushed to the other one and threw himself on him. The boys rolled over the floor, punching each other and pulling their hair.
"Yoo mean!"
"Yoo stoopid!!"
That's when a blond girl entered in a hurry. She froze when she saw her friends fighting. She hurried to them and tried to separate them.
"Stop this now!" she ordered. "Please stop!"
A brown haired boy entered hearing everything.
"What, Quisty?"
"Irvy, help me!"
While Quistis was pulling Squall, Irvine was pulling Seifer. Despite his year younger, Irvine was pretty strong.
"Leggo!" Seifer exclaimed.
"Bossy, leave me!" Squall ordered.
"No, that's enough!"
Squall stopped moving and started crying. Seifer smiled and freed himself from Irvine's grip.
"Yoo crybaby just like Zell..."
"I'm not!"
Squall ran out the room and headed into the back alley. There he just stood, looking at the horizon.
"Squall?" a voice called.
He turned around and saw the comforting blue dress of Ellone. He buried his face in her dress and sobbed.
"What is it?"
"S...Seifer..."
"What?"
"He...he said I'm not your brother..."
"That's not true! You're my little brother, Squall and you'll always be. I promise..."
*****
I don't really know why Seifer was so frustated. I can't believe he was only jealous, there must have been something else... maybe envious of me? The good days are about to end and I suppose you guess what will happen. Even with Seifer always mean to everyone, Zell always crying, Quistis always 'bossy', I always found Ellone to comfort me...until then...
*****
"The ship is ready, m'am," a man told Edea.
She was by the beach, a huge ship floating further.
"Good."
Edea sighed sadly but she had to do it. Even though Adel was gone, she was feeling like something would happen to ellone, something bad. And she would feel that way until Ellone would go somewhere safe.
She called her and she came. Other kids were already by her side as Ellone approached.
"What, Matwyn?"
The kind Sorceress kneeled down to the little one.
"It's dangerous here, Ellone. Now I want you to have a life. You're not forced to live here anymore."
"What do you mean?"
"Do you see that beautiful ship over there?" she asked pointing at it.
Ellone nodded.
"You'll go with those kids."
"Is Squall coming too?"
"No, Squall'll stay here."
"Then I'll stay too! I promised I'd always be his sister!"
"You will, but you must leave, you're in danger here. Go with these people, they'll be your family."
"I don't want any family! I want to stay here with Matwyn, Squall, Quisty, Irvy, Sefie, Zell and Seifer too!"
"Sorry, sweetie..."
A man took the girl up in his arms and placed her in a boat despite her protests. The other kids followed, saying good-bye to their Matron.
"No, no!" Ellone protested. "I have to stay with Squall, I promised!!"
The boat floated to the ship and one hour later, it was gone, taking Ellone with it.
*****
I...I wonder why I haven't heard anything when it happened. I can't believe Ellone was taken away.
That ship was the white SeeD ship. I guess the kids were the SeeDs I met some time ago. I feel...sad when I think about this...
Even though we all know Edea is married with Cid, we never saw him anywhere. That's because he was working on those things dug out from an ancient civilization which we know as the Centra. Those were to become Gardens later. I guess at first he was just researching them and didn't have any purpose since they didn't think about SeeDs yet. I guess the ship was just a moving orphanage because their was a bit too much kids in the stone house. Maybe it got known as the White SeeD Ship around the time Garden were instored. Whatever...
Now the hard time begins, but it seems to be hard only for me...or maybe it was for everyone too they just tried not to think about it, to forget... Considering Ellone was almost my real sister and always close to me, losing her really made me feel alone. Even the other kids' company wasn't making me feel good...
*****
When Squall woke up, he sat up in his bed and looked around. Seeing there were kids missing, he supposed they were adopted. He tried to see if his friends were still there. Sleeping peacefully, he recognized Seifer, Quistis, Irvine, Selphie and Zell probably having a nightmare from the look on his face.
Squall turned his head to his side to Ellone's bed. Squall lost his smile and got down his bed to reach Ellone's.
"Sis?" he called in a whisper as he climbed on the bed.
But it was empty. No sign of Ellone anywhere. Squall looked around with his eyes wide with fear and panic.
"Sis? Where are you?"
Seifer grumbled and turned on his side.
"Stop it," he mumbled.
Squall jumped down the bed and ran out the room, opening the door loudly. The others all sat up straight at the sound.
"What?" Zell asked rubbing his eyes.
"Not me!" Irvine exclaimed still half asleep.
Quistis looked at Squall's empty bed and messed sheats and figured out it was him who suddenly cried out like that.
"Squall!" she called getting up.
Seifer frowned, mad.
"What's Sis doing? She always takes care of it!"
He got up after Quistis but not for the same purpose. Selphie followed, getting excited.
"Seifer is gonna fight Squall again!" she exclaimed.
"Sefie, wait for me!" Irvine called going after her.
Zell sulked.
"They'll be punished again!"
He hesitated but as usual, he followed.
No one in the next room. Squall was filled with panic as he quickly got back in the bedroom, bumping into Quistis...
"Squall!"
Then into Seifer...
"What yoo doin' stoopid?"
Into Selphie...
"No fight?"
Into Irvine...
"What's goin' on?"
And finally into Zell.
"Watch out!"
But Squall never stopped or slowed down. His heart was beating incredibly fast from the fear. He found his yellow t-shirt and his pants and put it on with his shoes and hurried outside again, almost bumping into everyone again. Seifer caught him by the t-shirt and pulled him to himself, showing a threatening fist under his nose.
"First yoo wake us all up then you run around like crazy?! What's yoor problem?"
"Gotta find Sis!" Squall exclaimed freeing himself from seifer's grip.
He ran to the back door and got outside. Then he scanned the place with growing fear until Matron came back from the beach. Then Squall ran to her and caught her skirt, pulling it.
"Matwyn! Matwyn! Sis is gone! Where's she?"
Edea tried to smile, but her eyes still showed sadness at the sight of the worried little one. But Squall wasn't stupid despite what Seifer was always saying. He could see something was wrong. She placed her comforting hads on Squall's shoulders.
"It was her turn, Squall. She's gone."
"Her turn?"
Squall understood what Matron was telling him it looked more like he didn't want to believe it or accept it.
"She left," Edea said.
"When will she be back?"
"She won't come back, Squall. She left us."
The little face changed completely. His eyes narrowed and his lips curved up as if he was about to cry.
"She left me?"
"No, no! She just had to leave."
Squall took his head in his hands and shook it, refusing to face the truth.
"She promised me! She said she'd never leave me alone! She...she must be somewhere!"
And he ran back into the ston house.
"Squall!" Edea tried to stop him.
But he was too determined for her. He ran around the orphanage, turning his head in every directions to look everywhere in the same time, but except for the curious kids wondering what was going on, no sign of Ellone.
Then he thought maybe she was back in bed again so he ran into the bedroom with a hopeful face, but Ellone's bed was just as empty as it was a while ago. He still didn't want to give up. The took the other door of the room and ended up in the yard, but Ellone wasn't there either so he took the door on the wall aside and entered in the main room again where Edea was back telling the others what happened. They were all shocked and sad, but only Squall was upside down.
Edea got up.
"Listen Squall. You will all leave this place someday. Today was Ellone's turn..."
"No! She's not gone!"
He went through the entrance and ran farther.
"Squall!"
Edea turned to Quistis.
"Please, go after him!"
Without a word, Quistis ran outside after Squall. She didn't have to go really far, she found him sitting on the ground, sobbing. She went to him.
"Squall..." she started.
A crying face turned to her and she kneeled down.
"She...she's not here...she's gone..."
He stared at Quistis who opened her arms to him. Squall threw himself in without a second thought.
"Quisty..."
The blond girl waited a moment before taking the boy back into the house where Edea was worrying. All the other kids were shocked except for one, standing away from the others. Seifer was leaning against the wall and looking away.
Edea remained silent as she crouched down to take Squall in her arms. Then she wondered if she made a mistake... Maybe she should have send Squall with Ellone on the ship...
*****
I don't know why Matron kept me in the orphanage. Maybe she had some feeling she had to do it. Besides, I think if I would have left with Sis, I probably wouldn't have turned out the way I am now... and never become the leader of SeeD, never fight Ultimecia...Maybe it wouldn't have been so bad but...maybe I wouldn't have met Rinoa either...Whatever...
After I managed to calm down a little, Edea gave me something, a ring with a lion carved on it. Back then, she said that it would make me strong but today...Apparently Ellone got it from someone close to me. Like Laguna. I never thought this ring could have been related to my family. Maybe I always felt it, that's why I was so attached to it. And then Rinoa ended up with it...Is it fate?
The day was as followed: I remained alone, wondering why Ellone left while the others were talking about it, all wondering if it was their fault. That was the final day I can recall that Seifer didn't tease anyone. He didn't say a word the whole day. But the next morning... I remember it for seeing it twice: as a kid and as...myself...
*****
The moment Squall woke up, he hopefully turned to Ellone's bed, trying to believe that everything was just a dream, a nightmare. But the bed was awfully empty.
"Maybe she's already up," he hoped.
He got up and dressed up before hurrying outside. Edea was already there.
"Good morning, Squall. How are you feeling today?"
"Where is Sis?" he asked looking around.
Edea lowered her head and closed her eyes.
"She left yesterday, Squall. Don't you remember?"
He stared at his Matron a moment then, without a word, got back in the bedroom and through the other door, going into the back alley.
"Squall, where are you going?" Edea asked.
He stopped at the edge of the yard, not noticing the man all dressed in black standing there. Squall placed his hands on his hips and looked up with determination.
"I'm gonna find Sis!" he exclaimed.
He left and Edea came out of the house.
"Squall!" she called.
The young man was tracing the youth when Edea stopped by his side and turned to him.
"Excuse me. Have you seen a little boy?"
He made a comforting move with his hand.
"You don't have to worry," he assured. "The boy won't go anywhere."
"I think so too," Edea answered sadly. "Poor thing..."
A purple light suddenly appeared on the ground behind Edea. She turned around to see a black winged woman with a long red dress coming out of the ground through the light.
"...You're alive!?" the young man exclaimed with surprise.
He took out a gunblade and held it with two hands, frowning at the woman. Edea turned to him.
"...The Sorceress?" she asked.
"Yes, Matron. We had defeated her."
The Sorceress walked forward, slowly, painfully. Edea wasn't sure to understand but she was definately a Sorceress, she just knew it, felt it.
"Matron, stand back," the young man said ready to fight.
But Edea stopped him.
"It's ok. There's no more need to fight. That Sorceress is just looking for someone to pass her powers onto."
She turned to the young man.
"In order to die in peace," she explained, "a Sorceress must pass her powers onto someone. I know for I am one too."
She turned to the Sorceress again.
"I shall take over that Sorceress' powers. I don't want any of the children to become one."
She walked towards the Sorceress.
"Matron!" the young man called putting his weapon away.
The woman stopped.
"I... can't disappear yet..." the Sorceress said weakly.
She opened her arms and a ball of purple light gathered over her head, passing onto Edea. She trembled from the shock. Then the Sorceress fell on her knees and disappeared in the ground with a purple smoke. Then Edea also fell on her knees, her palms on the ground. The young man snapped out of his surprise and hurried to Edea. He put a knee down and looked at her with concern.
"Is this...the end?" she asked.
"...Most likely," he answered.
Edea looked up and place a hand on his knee.
"You called me Matron. Who...are you?"
"A SeeD. A SeeD from Balamb Garden."
"SeeD? Garden?"
He nodded.
"Both SeeDs and Gardens were your ideas. Garden trains SeeDs, SeeDs defeat Sorceresses."
"What are you saying?" she asked getting up.
Then she suddenly figured out who that guy was.
"You're...that boy from the future?"
"Matron."
She suddely looked concerned.
"Please return. You do not belong here."
Squall suddenly came back, all sad as he stopped near Edea.
"...I can't find Sis," he said.
Edea kneeled to him, taking his hand in hers.
"...Am I...all alone?"
Then he turned to the man in black leather with brown hair and a scar between his eyes.
"Who's he?" he asked.
"Nobody," Edea answered rubbing the top of his head. "You don't need to know. The only Squall permitted here is you."
She got up and turned to the young man. The little Squall didn't understand what Matron meant by that. Was there more than one Squall?
"Do you know where to go back?" she asked the young man. "Do you know how?"
She really seemed concerned in front of that guy.
"Will you be alright by yourself?"
The young stood straight, placing a hand in front of his face in some kind of salute. He gave Matron a comforting look and suddenly disappeared.
Squall widened his eyes with surprise.
"Wh...where'd he go?" he asked looking around.
Edea turned to him.
"He went back home, I know he is."
Then she turned to the horizon, thoughtful.
"SeeDs...Gardens...Sorceress...maybe..."
"Huh?"
But Squall remained without any explanations.
*****
That's something weird that I saw myself. There's really something strange. Edea haven't heard of Garden or SeeDs until I showed up... So was it me who gave her the idea?
Probably, because after that, Edea started to spend more time with Cid, talking about those thing he dug out. That,s when they decided to call it Garden. I know Norg was giving the money for the repairs and adjustments of Balamb. Then Edea decided the boat that took Ellone away from me would be the white SeeD ship, always moving around so no one could catch Ellone.
But when she told the purpose of SeeDs, Cid was reluctant, fearing one day, the SeeDs would fight Edea but she assured that wouldn't happen.
She was wrong...
Here's something I didn't know about. Seifer somehow heard about what I was doing and he was dragged here out of curiosity. I told him what it was then he asked where I was. When I told him it was the second day after Ellone left, he asked me if he could add something. I didn't object. I'm really looking for the most details possible to help me understand...
*****
Squall was still wondering what happened, Edea telling him that wasn't important, that he had to forget.
Back in the main room, Selphie and Irvine were already chasing each other around the place, Zell playing by himself and Quistis watching everything like a babysitter. Seifer was standing against the wall, expressionless until he saw Squall coming in.
"Where yoo been again?"
His voice wasn't mad. Apparently, he wasn't looking for a fight, just being curious.
"Looking for Sis. I couldn't find her."
Seifer frowned, annoyed.
"She's gone, don't yoo understand?"
"But she promised me!"
"Promises are for fools! Ou know why she left? Cause yoo're not her brother!"
"Seifer!" Quistis exclaimed.
He was bearing his teeth and suddenly, he ran to the back of the house and through the back door. Squall started to cry and the others stopped playing. Quistis hurried to Squall to comfort him. She decided to take Ellone's place as the big sister.
"He didn't mean it, Squall. Yoo'll always be Sis' brother."
Outside, Seifer reached the beach down the stairs behind the orphanage. He was breathing fast and tears were rolling down his cheeks, drying on the warm sand. He wiped them away with anger and stared at the ocean which appeared blurry to him.
"Sis... Yoo left because of me, did you? Yoo said I was mean... I wanted to change after yoo said I would always be your brother..."
He lowered his head.
"Squall... I hate yoo..." he whispered.
In his mind, Squall was always Ellone's favorite so she couldn't be his sister too. She left because he was mean to Squall. Then Seifer made a decision: he looked up frowning at the waves.
"Then I'll be more mean! Always mean! I'll show you, Sis! I'll make yoo pay for leaving me alone!!"
*****
There! Now the mystery's solved. Everyone knows why I tease everyone. But maybe everybody Thought I always was like that but there was a time in my childhood where I REALLY wanted to change. Sis was my motive, but after she left, I gave up. Like Squall, I kept hoping she would come back one day but as everyone knows, she never came back. She left me...left us all...alone...
My confession is done so I give back the place to Squall. Thanks a lot, Squall...
...You're most welcomed, Seifer for sharing that part of your childhood with me, with us. Now there're lot of things I understand.
We skip a few days here, to the day the others decided to have fireworks... Geez, did they get in trouble!! But don't ask me where they got 'em, I have no idea. And I'm sure Edea also wonders about that!
*****
Selphie bursted in the room with her usual yellow t-shirt and green overalls. She turned to the short haired boy wearing a kaki t-shirt and grey pants.
"Irvy, wanna play?" she asked with her hands behind her back.
The little guy stepped forward.
"Sefie, wha'cha playin'?
Selphie walked to the back door and turned to Irvine.
"WAR!" she exclaimed.
And she ran through the door, Irvine laughing behind her.
Later, quistis was in the room with her red t-shirt and blue pants, her hair in a ponytail. Zell came in from the alley door, wearing a grey t-shirt and a short dark blue overalls. Selphie was standing there too, apparently waiting for something. Irvine suddenly entered through the back door, a wide smile on his face.
"This way!" he exclaimed.
He left again and the others followed, curious.
In the bedroom, little Squall was standing by the bed, looking down.
"Matwyn!" he called. "Sis isn't here! Where's Sis!?"
Edea entered and smiled to the little one.
"Come on, Squall. Why don't you play with the others?"
Without answering, Squall walked through the door leading in the back alley where he stood, sadly.
"Sis...... Elle..."
He went in through the side door but there was nobody there so he exited through the back door. Laughs could be heard from down the beach. He didn't feel like going there with the others so he just stood on the stones.
"Sis...," he whispered. "Where'd yoo go? Yoo don't like me anymore?"
*****
No one answered me that day. Today I know it's not true.
Later this night, the others set off fireworks at the beach. I was left out of it but I don't really care. They were the ones who got in trouble, not me.
*****
The lighthouse standing on the cliff further was spreading its light over the sea over and over again. Down the stairs of the stonehouse, four kids were standing around a bright sparkle at the top of a stick. Selphie was crouching in front of it with a wide smile. By her side, wearing a cross sleeveless shirt with dark pants, Seifer was staring at the spark too. Not smiling but fascinated somehow. In front of Selphie, Quistis and Irvine were also enjoying the show.
Zell suddenly appeared at the top of the stairs.
"Yooooo!!!"
He hurried down and stopped in the stairs half-way.
"Kids aren't suppose'ta play with fireworks!"
He kept going to the others.
"I'm tell-ing!!!" he threatened. "I'm gonna tell on yoo!!!"
The others grumbled, upset by Zell's threat. Siefer turned to him and frowned, his little fists on his hips.
"Cry-Ba-By-Ze-ll!" he exclaimed. "Go back to bed!"
"Yeah!" Selphie exclaimed. "We're tryin'ta have fun!"
"Come on Zell!" Quistis begged. "Yoo're not tellin' are yoo?"
Without answering, Zell went back upstairs.
*****
And of course, Zell told everything so the others all got scolded. They were punished to stay in the bedroom all the evening. They were scolded one after the other before being sent to bed. I don't remember where I was but I think I must have been wondering why Sis was gone.
*****
Later, Selphie and Quistis were standing in the bedroom, mad. They were on a side of a bed and Zell on the other side. Quistis was really mad at him.
"Why did yoo do that, Zell? Yoo're mean!!"
"Yeah!" Selphie said along. "We were havin' fun! Yoo not my friend anymore!"
"Yoooo! C'mon! Stop it! Matwyn, help!!!"
Seifer entered, frowning, his blond hair covering half his face. His uncovered eye spotted Zell right away, frowning madly at him. He walked in front of Zell.
"CRY-BABY-ZE-ELL!!!" he exclaimed.
Zell was about to cry, upset. Selphie frowned, upset also but agreeing with Seifer.
"NAH-NA-NA-NA-NA-NAH!!!" Seifer continued.
Little Zell placed his hands on his ears, shutting his eyes.
"Stop teasing me, Seifer!"
Irvine came in, followed by Matron.
"That's enough!" she said. "Go to bed, all of you!"
That was the first time Matron was raising her voice at them, they froze and obeyed right away. Taking their clothes off and changing in their pijamas, they went to bed.
"What about Squall?" Seifer risked asking.
"He'll join you later. Good night."
She turned the light off and left the room, closing the door.
Lightnings outside lightened the room and thunder followed. Zell hid under the sheets of his bed and started sobbing.
"Cry baby," Seifer whispered.
*****
Matron was looking for Squall but when she saw he was nowhere in the house, she feared he would have left with that awful weather. There was no more thunder or lightning just calm rain.
Squall was simply at the entrance, leaning against a pillar, looking at his feet.
"...Sis..."
He sighed sadly.
"I'm...all alone."
He looked up.
"But I'm doing my best..."
He looked down again.
"I'll be ok without yoo, Sis. I'll be able to take care of myself.
*****
Now things are definately gonna change. The next day, Matron came to tell us we had to gather in the main room: people were coming to see us...
*****
The six kids were standing side by side when Edea invited a couple to enter. A brown haired woman and a blond man, both around 30 years old. They stood in front of the kids and smiled warmly, looking at all of them. Edea stood by their side.
"Kids, say hi to Mr. And Ms. Dincht."
The kids bowed.
"Hi, Mister and Miss Dincht, they said together."
The woman joined her hands, delightful.
"Tell us about them," the man asked.
"Sure."
The first in line was Irvine.
"This is Irvine. He likes to play a lot and has plenty of energy to spare. Next to him is Selphie. She is very lively and also has plenty of energy. Then it's Zell. Not a bad boy but he cries often. Quistis quite like to boss the others. She has some leadership in her I guess. Squall there...well he's pretty lonely and doesn't speak much. Seifer...is much like a troublemaker, picking up fights all the time."
Then she remained silent, looking at the couple. The man turned to his wife.
"What do you think?"
"You're letting me decide?"
"Sure. Your choice will be a good one."
She walked forward and looked at all the kids. Irvine was smiling lovingly, Selphie widely, Zell sadly, Quistis seriously, Seifer was frowning and Squall wasn't smiling at all, not even frowning.
Without any hesitation, the woman kneeled in front of Zell and smiled warmly at him.
"Your name is Zell, right?"
He nodded, on the verge of tears but with shining eyes.
"How would you like to have a room just for you and a lot of toys to play with?"
"A room...? Just for me? With toys?"
The woman nodded. Zell's eyes were as stars, melting the woman's heart. She slightly opened her arms and the little one started crying as she hugged him comfortingly.
"He just need parents," she said.
Then she released him, rubbing his head.
"Him, it's this one we'll take home."
"Alright," Edea said. "Come with me."
The couple followed Edea's lead to another room, the brown haired woman smiling at Zell. He smiled back, rubbing his eyes. Then he turned to the others who looked sad. Some seemed envying and others jealous. Zell lost his smile, looking at the kids who've been his family for so long.
"Yoo guys..."
"It's yoor turn, Zell," Irvine said with a smile.
"Happy for yoo!" Selphie exclaimed.
"Better be good!" Quistis commanded.
Squall didn't say a thing. Seifer just frowned.
"She chose yoo 'cause yoo're crybaby!"
And he left without forgetting to stick his tongue out to Zell one last time, for the last time.
Edea came back with the Dincht. They gave Zell a coat to put on and asked him to say goodbye. Looking at the four remaining kids, all, despite their smile, were on the verge of tears. Even Squall.
"It's my turn... Good bye..."
He hugged Irvine.
"Lucky..."
And Selphie.
"They look nice..."
Quistis.
"Be a good boy."
He hesitated in front of Squall but still gave him a hug.
"Maybe we'll see again," Zell hoped.
"......"
Zell walked back to the Dincht. Mr Dincht took him in his arms and walked to the door with his wife after thanking Edea.
Over the man's shoulder, Zell was waving at the others.
"G'bye everyone! I'll never forget yoo!"
The others waved back, following.
"Bye Zell! Be happy!"
And the door closed.
*****
When Zell hugged me, I remember thinking: "Zell's leavin' me alone too...like Sis... who next time?"
Not very cheerful.
A few weeks later, it was Quistis, adopted by the Trepe couple. She told us all to be good before she left like the little bossy we remember.
Seifer was mad but I don't know if he was jealous or just sad she was leaving... Whatever...
With Zell gone, I became his favorite victim but with Quistis gone, there was no one to defend me...
I was about 5 and Seifer 6 when it was our turn but we were not adopted. That brown haired man we saw sometimes with Matron came to talk to us. Cid wanted orphans in Balamb Garden...
*****
"I really don't think it's a good idea," Edea said folding her arms.
The brown haired man looked at her, playing with his glasses.
"Why not? Isn't it a chance for them to have a home?"
"Of course, but... why the two of them? They are always fighting and I'm sure they would be very glad if they could never see each other again."
"I picked kids from many orphanages for Balamb Garden and I placed a limit until the other Gardens are ready."
"But why them both? They're always fighting!"
"That's the point! They have the required energy to fight and they will learn discipline."
Edea turned her back on her husband and took her chin in her hand, thinking.
"They are full of spirit and I want them to develop it even more until that day they'll encounter the Sorceress. Especially 'that' boy."
"Squall..."
The man closened to her.
"The only reason I hesitated was that I'm afraid one day they might go after you."
Edea turned around again and smiled playfully.
"Cid, that will never happen. I'll make sure of it."
The man looked at her, waiting. Edea rolled her eyes up and shrugged, shaking her head.
"You're right. I can't take care of them forever so... I guess it's better."
Cid nodded with a smile and they both went to the kids in the other room. Irvine playing with Selphie as usual, Seifer trying to pick a fight on Squall. The little brown haired one was trying to ignore the blond one but Seifer was really putting his heart into it. Squall's eyes were slowly filling with tears and gradually turning to a frown. He was on the verge of giving up.
"Stop it!" he screamed running towards Seifer.
With a smirk, Seifer waited for him, ready.
Just before they started fighting, Cid and Edea came in.
"Seifer! Squall, that's enough!"
Squall froze, crying and Seifer just faced him his back. Edea was frowning at them and Cid was smiling to himself, convinced he did the right choice.
"Come here you two," Edea said kneeling down.
They did as they were told. Squall wiped away his tears.
"Us too?" Irvine asked.
"You can stay but it doesn't concern you... for now."
Cid looked at the little guys. So much energy in their eyes.
"Kids, I've been working for some months now on a building called 'Garden'. It's a home where orphans will learn to fight so when they're older, they can become mercenaries we call SeeDs."
"What is a mercenary?" Seifer asked.
"It's someone people hire to fight in their place."
"What's hire?" Squall asked.
"It's being paid for what you do, receiving money for a good job."
Cid waited in case the kids would have asked something else. And Seifer did.
"So?" he asked.
"So you two are gonna live in that place."
"What?" Seifer exclaimed. "Us two? With him?"
He pointed Squall a disgusted way.
"Yes you two. You have lots of energy and your fighting spirit is just what I'm looking for. What do you think? You'll have a home!"
Seifer shrugged and Squall looked at Cid hopefully.
"Will I see Sis there?"
Cid frowned with curiosity and Edea placed her hands on Squall's shoulders.
"Maybe, someday you'll see her again."
He thought a moment. Zell and Quistis were gone, there was only Irvine, Selphie, Seifer and himself left. Have a home with lots of people... But the only one he wanted to see was Sis! But he would be able to see her someday, maybe.
"Yes...I want home."
"Me too," Seifer added peeking at Squall. "I wanna go."
"Good!" Cid exclaimed getting up.
Irvine and Selphie came closer.
"What about us?" Irvine said.
Cid turned to their worried faces.
"Squall and Seifer are going to Balamb Garden. There are two more almost complete and when they are, you'll go there."
"But meanwhile you'll stay with me," Edea said smiling comfortingly.
"So young men, gather your things if you have anything and come to the beach when you're ready."
And Cid exited through the back door.
Seifer eyed Squall again before going into the bedroom. Squall looked at the others a moment, not sure what to do. When Edea smiled at him like she used to, he walked to the bedroom after Seifer.
Neither of them had much to take with them. A few changive clothes and that's all. When he was assured Seifer wasn't caring about him, Squall put a hand under his bed. He moved a piece of wood from the floor and took a small paper box out of the hole. He protectively held it close to his heart and peeked at Seifer again who wasn't paying attention to him at all. Squall opened the box and took out the perfectly clean platinum ring. He looked at the winged creature with shining eyes before rubbing his cheek with the cold metal.
"Sis..."
He put it on his left mid finger, the only one big enough so the ring wouldn't slip. He placed his clothes on a shirt and tied it up like a bag. Then he got up.
Seifer got up right when Squall walked by, bumping against him. Squall fell and Seifer frowned at him.
"Watch it 'kay? Don't forget we'll be together so get outta my way!"
And Seifer left. Squall got up and walked to the door. He turned around one last time to look at what have been his bedroom since he was a baby. With a sigh, he made a silent promise to Ellone about being good and do his best. He turned to leave when Seifer past by him, almost bumping into him again.
"Wha'cha doin', Seifer?"
"Forgot somethin'," he simply answered.
He walked to a drawer and took it out. Behind it, something was scotched. No one ever took that drawer out so no one ever knew about this. Seifer took the necklace out of its hideout. The silver sheet in hands, shining, he held the chain with his fingers. He turned the large sheet around and read his name carved on it. He wondered a long time if he should take it, the only thing attached to his past, with him or leave it behind, with his childhood.
"Seifer, yoo okay?" Squall asked walking in.
Seifer quickly hid the necklace out of Squall's sight.
"Just checkin' if anything fell
behind the drawer."
"So?"
"No, nothin'. Go ahead, I'm comin'."
"O...kay..."
Squall curiously traced Seifer on his way out. A minute ago, Seifer was mean to him as usual and now... He must have been really thoughtful!
Seifer decided to keep it. He tied it up behind his neck. It was an adult size so the sheet was going down. But he would grow up and it would fit perfectly. For now, it was long enough to be hidden under his vest. He put the drawer back in place and got out of the room. He looked around and didn't saw Squall anywhere. He was probably out already. Only Edea was left by the exit.
"Ready, Seifer?" she asked with a smile.
He nodded and pushed his hair away from his face. Then he walked out, Edea behind him. He climed down the stairs to Cid waiting with Squall, Irvine and Selphie waiting to say good bye.
"There you are!" Cid said happily. "Ready?"
With a frown, Seifer looked at Squall's sad face then back at Cid's. He nodded.
"Good!" Cid exclaimed with a smile. "Let's go you two."
He turned to what looked like an opened mouth. It was a vessel which's entrance was on the front of it. There were few kids already inside but neither Squall or Seifer ever saw them before. Cid saw their curious looks and decided to answer their silent question.
"These are kids from other orphanages. There will be lots of kids where we're going. You'll have lots of friends!"
But Cid was obviously more enthousiastic than his little friends. Seifer only wanted to get outta here once and for all and know what's a home like. Squall only thought about the possibility of seeing Ellone someday. This was his only motivation.
Cid entered the vessel befor turning to the others.
"Say good bye, guys."
Seifer shrugged but still turned to Irvine and Selphie, standing each side of Edea. That was what was left of the family he lnew. He wasn't sure what to do but while he was thinking, Squall has already stepped forward. Edea kneeled down to him with a warm smile.
"Grow strong, Squall. You have to."
Squall didn't understand what she meant. Edea suddenly wrapped her arms around him.
"Be careful, okay? And have faith."
"... Goodbye, Matwyn..."
She released him and rubbed her eyes. Was she crying? Selphie cheerfully waved at Squall and Irvine gave a wide smile.
"Be good!" Selphie said. "And have fun!"
"Maybe we'll see each other again!" Irvine hoped.
"G'bye," Squall finished with a faint smile.
He walked backward a few steps then spun around and stepped in the vessel.
For the first time, Seifer looked shy. He knew he could never see them all again. He wasn't there when Zell left, neither for Quistis and he was feeling something close to regret. So he stepped forward with a fake frown. Edea was still on her knees. She took Seifer's hands in hers and sighed, smiling at him.
"Be good, Seifer. I'm proud of you."
"Thanks, Matwyn," he whispered.
She clenched his hands a little then released him. Irvine and Selphie looked like they weren't sure of what to do. So they decided to say goodbye.
"Goodbye," Irvine said.
"Bye bye!" Selphie said with more enthousiasm.
"...bye," Seifer simply said going to the vessel.
When he stepped in, Cid went further inside to tell something. He came back and the vessel started slowly floating away. Irvine and Selphie hurried to the limit of the beach waving Squall and Seifer good bye. Edea waved too. Seifer looked like he was glad to leave this place. Unlike Squall who seemed sad. When the vessel closed its door, Edea stopped waving but Irvine and Selphie kept doing it for a while.
The vessel turned around itself and floated away, taking kids away from their home to a new one.
END OF FIRST PART