Hi everyone! So I started this story like a week after the finale. And I just now got around to finishing it. As much as I love Booth and Brennan, there's just a little part of me that loves Booth with Angela, too. This is my way of feeding that part of me because I have no hope that HH ever will. I do not own anything on Bones. Or the song Half of My Heart by John Mayer. Just love them both. Please let me know what you think! Good or bad. It's all helpful!
I never thought I would end up marrying her when I asked her out. Hell, I didn't even think she would say yes. She was in the middle of a messy divorce, and I was heartbroken that Bones wasn't coming back from where ever the hell she went. She said she was tired of murder and solving cases, but I think we both knew she was just tired of working with me. And even now, I'm still not sure what happened between Ang and Hodgins when they went to Paris. She still doesn't talk about it, even a year and a half later. I know some, but it can't be all of it. They still work together, albeit awkwardly, but I'm not sure she'll ever tell me. I'm not sure I really want to know.
I'd been home about three months when she invited me to get drinks. She said that she couldn't stand to watch me mope around the lab anymore. She said that staring at the new anthropologist isn't going to turn her into Bones. I wanted her to be wrong, even though she obviously wasn't. I agreed more because I felt like she needed the drink more than I did, not that I ever told her that. I didn't realize until we were actually at the bar that the two of us had never actually hung out alone outside of work before. Never without Bones, which I was immediately annoyed by. I let Bones run my life- all aspects of my life. Even the ones she didn't know about.
"I'm glad we did this." I gave her my best grin, and she returned it with the slightest blush across her cheeks. She was beautiful. Don't get me wrong, Angela had always been beautiful, but always in the off limits, I could never have her- kind of way. She was my partner's best friend, and even I knew that that was a terrible idea, way before I realized how much I cared for Bones. But suddenly Bones was gone, and Angela's dimples were just a little more adorable and heart-melting than before.
"Me too, sweetie." She laughed as she slid onto a stool at the bar in front of a round of shots for us that made things a lot less awkward- very quickly. We ended up on the dance floor with a playlist of songs that were not meant for two friends, but we danced to them anyway. It never felt awkward to hold Ang so close, she was intimate without touching, it felt natural to hold her as we danced slowly to the everlasting list of romantic love songs.
"Why have we never done this?" I asked her as she wrapped her arms around my neck a little more tightly than before. I could feel her breath on my ear as she let out a soft laugh, and for the first time in over a year, I could feel my body respond to a woman in a good way. I could feel my breath hitch in my throat as I waited for her to answer- I wasn't sure if we were going to cross that line or not. I wasn't sure if I really wanted to. I didn't want to ruin one of the few good relationships I had left at the lab.
"There was a line." She sighed as she looked into my eyes. "There was always a line."
"Is the line gone?"
"You tell me." She tensed up, and I didn't know the answer. Sure Bones was gone, but was I still holding out hope that she'd come back? Yes, Yes I was.
"I don't know, Ang. Was there really only one line?"
"There's only one now." She shook her head as she took a step backwards. "I think I should go home."
"Let me drive you." I offered weakly, unsure of what I was really supposed to do. It hadn't been a date, but it certainly felt like it. I'd never seriously considered dating Angela before, and it somehow felt like even a bigger gamble than dating Bones. Bones was a pretty big gamble all on her own.
"No. That's okay." She smiled sadly at me. "I don't need an FBI agent to get me home safely. I've been doing it just fine for years now." I chuckled softly at her as I released her from my grasp. I didn't want to admit that I suddenly felt too cold without her. It was absurd, after all. I was the one wearing a jacket.
"Have a good night, Ang. I'll see you on Monday."
"You too, Booth." She whispered, and it took everything in me to let her walk away. I knew that I had to though, the same way I knew that everything had changed between us with those drinks whether I liked it or not. It scared me to admit it, even if only to myself, which is how I knew that I couldn't ask her out drunk- she would turn me down before I ever got the question out.
It was another two months before I got up the nerve to ask her on the date. To be honest, I was a little more afraid of her saying yes than her saying no. Not only would that mean I had to plan the date, but I would have to tell Hodgins. I didn't know what happened between them, but the way he moped around the lab told me that he would still be with her if he could. I didn't know how he would react. I didn't even know if I had to tell him. We weren't friends, exactly. Except that we were- which is what made it so hard to ask her. I didn't want him to be the last to know, but I also didn't want to tell him if it wasn't going to lead anywhere.
I don't think she knew what to think when I showed up at her apartment that Wednesday night. It was well after nine, and I'd downed a beer (or two) to calm my nerves before going over there. I didn't even know if she still talked to Bones. Although I knew rationally she probably did, I wasn't sure. It wasn't as if Bones wasn't accustomed to cutting ties. That was something I could definitely attest to.
"Can I ask what you came all the way across town for, sweetie?" She grinned at me, which gave me a little encouragement- although not nearly enough.
"Can I come in?" I ran my hand through my hair nervously as I watched her bite her bottom lip. She was probably deciding whether or not this was work related. Not that I'd ever shown up at her house in all the years before. In fact, I'd only been there one time, and it was to pick up Bones. Thankfully being a soldier gave me a good sense of direction or I would have never found it.
I nearly blushed as she eyed me questioningly, but luckily she eventually let me in. It was the first time I'd ever actually been inside her place, and yet it felt uniquely familiar. Maybe because it was just so Angela. There were lots of drawings and paintings on the wall, and what space was left was covered with shelves of books and CDs. It took everything in me not to look through her music collection, but I resisted. I reminded myself that I came for a specific purpose.
"Anytime now, Booth. I do have to be at work at 6 in the morning. And in case you forgot, that is your fault." I wanted to protest that, but she was probably right. Dr. Sumners, the new anthropologist, was not nearly as dedicated to her work as Bones was, which made the cases go by much slower, and the bad guys free on the streets for much longer than I would like- which translated into me nagging the rest of them a little more than I should. I figured they are used to me. I don't think Dr. Sumners will ever get used to me. I'm not even allowed to use her first name, and she doesn't go into the field. I just have everything shipped to the lab on my own. It was weird not to have a partner anymore, but I couldn't just replace Bones so quickly. Too many years invested. Too much trust lost.
"Are you over Hodgins?"
"I'm divorcing him." She crossed her arms, and I could feel myself squirm. Whatever part of me that thought I was going to get away from this with any dignity was nuts. I wasn't even close to being smooth.
"That's not the same thing as being over him."
"No, I'm not over him. I loved him." She sighed as she leaned back against her overstuffed love seat. "I don't know if I'll ever be over him, but I do know that we are over. Which is what helps me get through the day."
"And how do you know that?" I hadn't meant to ask. It wasn't my business. Except that I needed to know. I thought maybe it would help me know if I was making the right choice being there with her. I thought it would prove to me that asking her out was the right choice. I should have known better.
"There was a week in Paris that he went to some sort of exhibit of bugs. I was fine with it, because sometimes it's nice to just be alone, you know? But the problem with Hodgins, what's always been the problem with Hodgins- is that it's great with him, he's fun, energetic, passionate, and quirky, but it's also great without him. I can't spend the rest of my life with someone that I can live without." I watched helplessly as she ran her fingers under her eyes trying to be subtle at wiping her tears. It wasn't successful though, and I was starting to regret I'd asked. I certainly hadn't meant to make her cry.
"I'm sorry, Ange." I whispered, because what I really thought, I could never say. I used to think I couldn't live without Bones. But I was wrong. When I looked at Angela, I knew that I didn't need Bones, even if I had spent unfathomable amounts of time thinking she was the center of my life. Sometimes centers don't need to hold. Sometimes they were never the center at all. Sometimes, you are just looking in the wrong place.
It wasn't the right time to tell her that though. "I shouldn't have come, Ange. I'm sorry." I offered weakly as I tried to head for the door. She wouldn't have that though. Angela never had let me off the hook. Not even in the beginning at our first Christmas. She'd demanded I kiss her under the mistletoe. On the lips. She didn't let the lockdown stop her either. She was adamant that the party wasn't necessary. She had a mistletoe in her office, and she'd already had several cups of eggnog. Given, I never told Bones about that. She tried to convince me that I was hallucinating during the entire thing. But I knew better. I think even she was skimmish to tell Bones. Bones would have said that it was inappropriate. In our defense though, Bones had totally just killed my Christmas joy, and I was in desperate need of a lift-me-up. Angela was always good at understanding how to fix things when Bones crossed the line. Lines that she never knew existed, much less accepted.
I thought I was almost free from my embarrassment when she grabbed my wrist to stop me. I should have known that Angela wouldn't let me get away that easily. Especially after I'd made her talk about Hodgins. "Why did you come here, sweetie?"
I wanted to keep walking. I wanted to hail the first cab I saw on the street and pretend the entire night never happened. Perhaps if I'd been sober, I could have done that. But I wasn't, so when she pulled me down on the sofa, I allowed it. I felt my face flush as her fingers intertwined with mine. "I want to take you out." I blurted, and immediately cursed myself for my less than stellar delivery. That was not how I'd wanted to do it. I'd wanted to use my charm and my humor to woe her. I'd wanted her to be so dazzled that saying no never crossed her mind.
"Out? A date? You're asking me on a date?" She squeezed my hand, and I really wasn't sure which answer she was hoping for, which did not make the moment any easier for me. So much for context clues.
"Yes. I want to take you out on a date, Angela. I want to pick you up, and take you to dinner, maybe go dancing, I want to give us a chance." I smiled nervously at her as she bit her bottom lip again. I could see the small twinkle in her eye start to appear, and I felt immediately better. Even if she said no, I could see the maybe in her eyes. And really, maybe was all I was really hoping for after the awkwardness I'd caused.
She surprised me, though. Not that that is so shocking. Angela has never been one that I called predictable. "No more lines?" She grinned at me, and I quickly, perhaps too quickly really, shook my head. I'd toasted Bones goodbye before I even allowed myself to go to Angela's. I knew I couldn't go halfway in with her. I knew that with someone that passionate, it had to be all or nothing. I was ready to give her my all. I just wasn't sure she wanted it.
"Angela, I've done a lot of things in my life, most of them have taught me that sometimes boundaries, lines, warning signs have to be ignored. We aren't promised that a bomb isn't going to go off and kill our future dreams, we aren't promised immortality free of disease, all we have is right now. And right now, there is me, and there is you. The only thing to decide is if you want to give this a chance."
"You told Brennan that she was the one. That you knew when you met her that she was the one." My stomach knotted as tears filled her eyes. I hadn't expected that. I hadn't known Bones told her about that. I hadn't known she'd told anyone.
"Bones and I, we were all wrong. I thought our differences were what fueled us. But I was wrong. Our differences would have killed us. Our differences did kill us. Bones' career is everything to her. But I need something more than that. I need more than my name in some textbook, Angie. I want to be happy, I want to know that at the end of the day, someone is waiting for me at home. I want forever, Ang, and right now, I want to be with you. You're passionate, and you're unapologetically honest, and kind, and you're beautiful."
"I'm still in the middle of my divorce, Booth."
"What are you waiting for? A holiday? A party? A cue card saying "date now"? Do you remember our first Christmas when we kissed? You knew exactly what you wanted, and you had no qualms on making it happen. I know what I want, Angela. I just need to know if you want it, too."
"It would destroy Hodgins." She whispered, and it occurred to me that she'd yet to say no. She was just drawing lines. I was so damn tired of the lines.
"Why are you trying to end it before it ever starts? Hodgins wants you to be happy. I want to make you happy. More importantly, I think I can make you happy."
"You do, Booth. It's just, us, me and you, it's so complicated already. How would we even begin? We have more baggage to a relationship we haven't started than most people that have been married thirty years."
"Let me worry about the baggage." I grinned, and felt very relieved when she returned it. I'd finally gotten through to her.
"You really are a knight in shining FBI standard-issue armor, aren't you sweetie?" She laughed, and again I could feel myself blush. Sweets had commented on my chivalry syndrome one too many times, but at that moment, I wasn't worried too much about Sweets. Sweets wrote a book saying Bones was perfect for me. Sweets was wrong. To hell with the 12 year old with too much time on his hands that he had to interfere with my own. I should have known not to trust the child. Not to trust Psychology.
"Is that a ye-" I was cut off by the feel of her glossed lips on mine, and I would be lying if I said that I didn't enjoy the moment. Unfortunately for me, I had to have chivalry and leave after a few minutes. I couldn't be like most of the population and let the moment transpire to the bedroom for fun. I was an idiot, but I did leave with a promise of a date, which is exactly what I went for.
I guess it worked in the end. Today we are getting married. A little over a year later. I wanted Hodgins to be my best man, but Angela assured me I would be cut off from sex for at least six months if I even brought up the idea to him. I couldn't have that. I'd spent a large portion of my savings on our honeymoon to Aruba- a honeymoon that will not consist of any work whatsoever. At the very least, I can say that I learn from others' mistakes. I wasn't even allowed to invite him to the wedding. Although, she eventually did. He declined, and I told her she shouldn't have made a big deal about it. Hodgins knows what he can handle, and what he can't. Luckily, or not so luckily depending on how you look at it, when I told Jared about the wedding, he jumped full force ahead into being the best man- without being prompted. It hadn't occurred to me to ask him, he's never in town. I should have, though. I was his best man after all. Even if he was pretty pissed off that he had to wait a year to get married just because I decided to "play hero" in Afghanistan.
I tried to convince her to have Cam as her Maid of Honor. She wouldn't hear of it, though. She said that Bones was her best friend, and under no circumstances would she have anyone else. Even if that meant she wasn't going to have one at all. I suppose that was an option in her mind. She wasn't sure how Bones was going to take the news. While she hadn't hidden our relationship from her, her shocked reaction told me that she hadn't been clued in very much to the details. I preferred it that way, not that I would ever say that to Angela. Of course, Bones promised she wouldn't miss the wedding for anything. True to her word, she flew in this morning. Cam had to pick her up at the airport at three this morning. Considering how much Cam loves sleep, I am certain there was some sort of reward involved in her agreement. Something tells me I don't really want to know the answer though. So I never ask.
I thought it was Jared knocking on the door to my dressing room, so I don't bother to ask who it is. I should have known better though. I can't quite hide my surprise when Bones peeks her head through the door. "Bones. Wow. You look beautiful." I smile at her through the mirror as I put on my coat. The ceremony starts in five minutes. Angela will kill me if I make it run even a minute late. I can't say I blame her after what happened the last time she tried to marry in a church. I've been promised bodily harm if I bring that up ever again though. In fact, most things involving our past are off limits today. Including our first kiss. Which intruded on my vows, but I allowed it. Angela is nothing if not respectful of Bones.
"Can I come in?" She looked so unsure that I was almost hesitant to agree, but I pushed that aside. She'd been my partner for five years. She was the reason I knew Angela. I will always be grateful to her. Even when it hurts to do so.
"Of course, Bones." I wave her in, and I force a smile as she makes her way over, her hands immediately finding themselves on my tie. Apparently it hadn't been straight before.
"I always knew you would get married." She smiled at me, and I could feel myself squirm. That did not sound like something I wanted to talk about.
"Thanks Bones. I'm really happy." I met her eyes to show my sincerity, and felt relief when she nodded in agreement.
"I can tell. Angela is, as well." Her eyes began to tear up, and that was when I knew I had to get out of there. I could not have a heart to heart with Bones. I'd promised Angela I'd closed that door, and I meant it. "I am so sorry I never came back, Booth. I'm sorry I haven't been here for you. I just couldn't. You understand, right?"
"Hey. It all worked out. I told you everything happens in the end. This is my happy ending, Bones."
"That wasn't the ending I had in my mind." She whispered, and I looked away.
"I promise I'm going to take care of her, Bones. I know how much she means to you."
"You're my best friend, too, Booth. Angela is known for rushing into things without thinking. I wanted to make sure you knew what you were doing."
"I love her, Bones. This is forever."
"I'll see you out there, then." She smiled as she released my tie from her grip. I wanted to tell her it was more crooked then than before, but I bit my tongue. I needed her to walk away. I couldn't take anymore. It was going to be hard enough to watch her walk down the aisle as the maid of honor without remembering the last time she'd done that. When I thought she would be the one I married.
Jared barged in a moment later with an evergrowing smile on his face. "Did I just see Temperance leaving your room? I knew you were edgy, bro. But she's the Maid of Honor!" He laughed and I threw the closest thing I could grab at his head. Unfortunately it didn't make it very far.
"She was making sure I don't have cold feet." I shook my head at him.
"And do you?" He looked uncertain, and I realized that perhaps I was the only one in the entire church that wasn't certain of my decision. I knew though. I'd known that night at the bar. Maybe I even knew when we kissed. My heart belonged to Angela. That didn't mean a part of it wouldn't always be held by Temperance Brennan. The same way Hodgins would always have a piece of hers. It was something I'd accepted.
The difference was that I could no longer live without Angela Montenegro Booth.