Well, I thought I would never do another songfic, but here I am. The song is "The Prince Song" by Meredith Louise Miller. I do not own it nor do I own Naruto, but then you guys already knew that.
There's one POV change, right after the second verse. It switches from Zabuza to Haku.
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It feels like crying
Well I'm not sure what that feels like
So it feels like throwing up
Spilling up
Guts
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Momochi Zabuza, on the morning of that fateful day where he killed over one hundred of the year's graduating class, was shaking. He was scared. He was tired of being bullied and teased and shoved around, and he'd decided to do something about it.
But he still wanted to piss his pants.
This was a stupid ass idea. He hadn't even qualified as a ninja yet, and he was going to go out there and try to kill a bunch of kids his age.
But they weren't just kids his own age. They were evil bastards who took pleasure in tormenting anyone who was puny or looked weak or didn't fit in, he reminded himself. He inhaled calmly, a deep and steady breath.
And then he earned the name "demon of the hidden mist"
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Well I don't know what you're thinking
I'm sure it's not enough
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The hands that had been shaking so badly he couldn't even pick up a kunai were now taking lives with ease, in some twisted sadistic dance. He grinned manically. All of the kids who had ever hurt him were lying dead, all around him.
"That was so easy" he said out loud, to no one. He turned to the few he'd left alive "See, easy. Now we all qualify"
A girl whose name he didn't even know, with tears running down her cheeks, yelled "You bastard! You monster! YOU KILLED MY BROTHER!"
"Shut up" he said, throwing a kunai with deadly accuracy, hitting her forehead. The other survivors, the ones who had never teased him, ran.
He sighed. "This is… all…" and sat down.
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But whatever we have here
let's not rush
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No one had wanted to, but they had to give him genin status. He and the few survivors were all given the genin rank, no questions asked.
He rose quickly through the ranks- in his chuunin exam he again showed his blood thirst. It was a massacre.
No one really cared about his welfare when he was on duty- and not many off duty. There were too many people who hated him- parents or siblings of the kids he'd killed back when he was still a kid, the survivors, who radiated fear and mistrust, and his seniors, who were all jealous of his innate talent.
He spent most of his time alone. There were people he knew, who he somewhat considered friends- the ones who would be the seven swordsmen some day, the people who lived at the boarding house where he stayed- but he was mostly alone.
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It feels like laughing
Well I did that just the other day
It feels like smiling
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Theirs had been a happy household, once- in that snowy little village in Mizu. Haku's father was a kind man, which said a lot, considering how most men in their town acted, and his mother was gentle but firm.
He didn't understand Kekkei Genkai back then. He didn't know what it was, all he knew was that he could make the ice and snow and water do really neat things if he tried. He discovered this power accidentally, when he was still at the age where he hadn't quite figured out reality yet, and he didn't know what was possible and what wasn't.
It was hard to do, so he didn't show anyone. He wanted to be able to show this skill when he could make something really beautiful.
So when he heard his mother laughing about how she missed the flowers when snow blanketed everything, he tried to make a flower for her with this strange gift.
"NO! YOU MUST NEVER DO THAT AGAIN, DO YOU HEAR ME, HAKU?" she said, slapping away his gift, which disappeared in the snow. Then she smacked him across the face.
She sank to her knees, crying "Haku, never, never, never, show anyone this."
"You mean I can't make the flowers anymore?"
"You can't do any of it, Haku." She said.
But his father and a friend saw this exchange. And that's what started it. Haku heard his mother scream, and he ran to the source of the noise.
Everything was confusing for him- those final few seconds, when he killed his father and the small mob who had come for him.
He crawled out of his house, into the snow, and sobbed.
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Well here you are
Don't go away
I know you're not trying to hurt me
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A few days later, he was on the street. A week later, he was starving. He stayed that way most of the time. No one wanted to help the pretty orphan who'd killed his parents, the boy with the tainted blood.
He lived on the streets for the better part of three years, gradually learning how to survive but never forgetting how it felt to be loved, and never getting over the hurt of being unwanted.
So when the strange man, the one with the metal headband, had looked down at him, remarking that he would die alone, the only one who had spoken to him in weeks, he smiled.
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What is effort?
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Somehow, in that one sad smile, in that one look, Haku said more to Zabuza than "Your eyes are like mine"
Haku reminded Zabuza of that human part of himself, the face behind the mask of the demon of Kirigakure. Because Zabuza knew, if anyone did, what it was like to be the one on that sidewalk, the one with the big eyes and empty stomach.
And Haku remembered what hope was- a stronger emotion then he'd ever felt before. This wasn't the simple anticipation for a toy.
This was a deep longing for acceptance. He wanted to go with him.
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Just do not leave me playing here
In the dirt
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So when Zabuza said "Come with me- you're mine now, body, soul and blood." And rested his hand on Haku's head, of course Haku was going to come with him.
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But someday… someday…
Someday my prince will come
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"Who the hell is this, Zabuza?" The man at the academy asked as Zabuza stood in front of the desk, attempting to enroll Haku.
"He's Haku. Now are you going to give me the damn paperwork or not?"
"Yeah, yeah, give me a second… fuck… lose my own head next. That kid have a last name to go with that? Momochi, maybe?" the man at the desk drawled.
"He's not my kid, ass wipe. He's my student." Zabuza said.
When they finally left the building, ridiculous amounts of paperwork in hand, Haku smiled.
"What's there to be happy about, brat?" Zabuza asked.
"I'll be able to get strong now" Haku said happily. "I can protect you"
"Kid, what I need from you is neither love nor affection and support. You are my weapon and my tool. Stay by my side and you'll strike where I tell you to strike, kill who I tell you to kill" Zabuza said, the first of many times.
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And I'll know, I'll know
That it's okay not to run
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"You've learned quite well" Zabuza said to Haku, who was practicing his Kekkei Genkai underneath a tree. Haku simply smiled.
"Yes. I can move between the mirrors now. I never even dreamed of speed like this" Haku replied.
"And you already possess all the skills to learn the Oinin's art. I'll put you in that division. It'll be useful" Zabuza said, resting his back against a tree.
"Hai" Haku replied, still practicing. Zabuza watched him.
"Kid, come here" Zabuza said. Haku immediately stopped what he was doing and walked over to Zabuza.
"Here. You must be hungry" Zabuza said nonchalantly, handing Haku a few packages of battered looking Onigiri.
"Thank you"
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It feels like snow white
Give me an apple
First take a bite
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By the time Haku was eleven, he could manipulate senbon better than any other Oinin. He knew how to kill and how to fake death, how to make a man's body collapse, how to paralyze someone's legs so they could never walk again.
More importantly, he'd learned how to watch and listen, and so he knew something was happening. Zabuza-sama had been talking to the demon brothers a bit too much lately.
Zabuza usually confided everything in him, but apparently what was going on was too secretive even for that. Haku didn't mind- he didn't care much about the grown up world of politics and the international balance of power. So he listened and picked out the most important bits of Zabuza's plans, and said nothing.
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And it feels like…
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And meanwhile, the plans were blooming, and Zabuza was pleased. He wasn't even that sure why he wanted a coup, but he planned it out anyway. There were just too many things wrong with the Mizukage back then.
And he'd found willing helpers- the demon brothers, a couple of the seven swordsmen, Kirigakure's Jinchuuriki, who only wanted to get out of the damn place, a couple of people even directly under the Mizukage. Even if Kisame didn't buy into it.
"You've always been fucked up, even when we were kids. But I have stuff here that I don't want messed up" Kisame told him simply.
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Momma, hold me tight
I know you're not going
Anywhere just yet
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It was the conversation a few months before his birthday that really caught Haku's attention.
"Haku, can you fake your own death, if you need to?" Zabuza asked.
Haku had shrugged and said "Of course."
Zabuza hadn't offered an explanation for his question, so Haku knew that it was important, and that whatever it was, it was happening soon.
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And even though we just met
I'm trying to forget that
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Zabuza later wondered about his decision to fake Haku's death. Was it simply easier that way? Or did he want to save Haku the annoyance of being chased by bounty hunters, if they failed?
He'd seen Haku on missions- while the kid was glad to kill while defending Zabuza, killing to defend himself was something different. Haku couldn't justify killing to save himself. He still did it, but it bothered him.
In any case, Haku faking his death was just a precaution. A last resort, for if they failed, and they wouldn't.
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But someday… someday…
Someday my prince will come
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"I have bad news for you, Haku… I'm leaving this land tonight! But…! I've sworn an oath to return as a conqueror, who'll crush them beneath my feet! And to do that, what I need from you is neither love nor affection and support. What I require is-!"
"I understand. I am your weapon and you tool. Keep me beside you, and I'll strike where you tell me to strike, kill who you tell me to kill"
"Heh. Good boy"
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And I'll know, I'll know
That it's okay not to run
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The first year on the road was the hardest. They had to learn how to survive quickly. Zabuza usually preferred killing anyone who might endanger them. Haku usually dealt with things with words- and more than his fair share of cross dressing.
Their missions tended to be assassinations, deals made in the dark. You couldn't count on anything else as a nuke-nin. No D-rank rescuing cats for them.
However, their clients for these sort of jobs tended to be not the most pleasant company. It was a week after Zabuza killed their third client for mouthing off that Gato came into the picture.
Basically, the man was the foulest scum of the earth. Zabuza's morals were not about to have him sainted, but even he drew the lines at something, like deliberately getting people hooked on opium and then putting a stranglehold on the supply, forcing the addicts to go into debt to keep buying. Like massacring entire villages to make room for a road, when the people had lived there for four hundred years. Like killing six year old girls who wandered into alleys where he was doing business, but not without having some sick fun first.
But as Haku put it "We need the money. And he's useful."
So Zabuza was relieved when the biggest mission that Gato set for them was killing an old man who was trying to build a bridge.
Of course, then the old man had to go get Konoha ninja involved, not only Konoha ninja but the copy ninja himself, and the last of the Uchiha, and the loudest ninja ever to have walked the earth.
Zabuza had his showdown with the copy ninja, and nearly got himself killed. Haku, like always, had appeared just in time to "kill" him.
But this battle on the bridge was the ultimate. There was no nick of time. There was no Haku to save him, only to smile so innocently afterward.
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It feels like crying
Well I'm not sure what that feels like
So it feels like throwing up
Spilling up
Guts
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Because Haku was clutching Kakashi's arm, digging into the flesh, the same arm that was reaching through him to kill Zabuza.
He didn't even have the time to say his final words before his heart fluttered to a stop. But the dead eyes that stared blankly at Kakashi were the same ones as on that day so long ago, when Haku had used them to ask Zabuza to take him with him.
"Zabuza, sir-" Haku coughed, unable finished, so what had always been unsaid would remain that way
And like hell Kakashi was going to let Zabuza go through the kid to get to him. So he leaped out of the way, taking Haku with him.
And then Kakashi laid out the body and closed Haku's eyes for the last time. Eyes that would never see Zabuza again. Eyes that could no longer promise Zabuza all the things he specifically told Haku that he didn't want- love, affection, support- but hadn't that always been a lie?
It was enough to die for him.
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Well I don't know what you're thinking
I'm sure it's not enough
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"…Gato's been using me… and I used Haku. Weren't you listening? It's a shinobi's lot. All of us are either users, tools… or both. I didn't value Haku for himself, but for the taint his blood carried… and for what his talents could do for me. I apologize for nothing."
"You…do you really mean that?" the blond boy asked, shaking. He was obviously having trouble comprehending his explanation. Well tough, kid, but that's what it is to be shinobi.
The kid broke free from his teacher's grasp. "Stop it, Naruto! Leave him alone. Our quarrel is over. Besides which…"
"SHUT UP--!" the boy yelled "HE'S STILL MY ENEMY!" then the kid ignored what Gato said in order to point at Haku. At Haku's body. "He… HE REALLY CARED ABOUT YOU! HE WAS DEVOTED TO YOU! BUT YOU THINK THAT'S NOTHING, THAT HE WAS NOTHING, YOU DON'T FEEL A THING! ARE YOU REALLY THAT HEARTLESS? IS THAT HOW YOU GET… WHEN YOUR POWERS ARE AS STRONG AS YOURS ARE? HE GAVE HIS LIFE FOR YOU!" the boy was crying now, tears streaming down his face.
"He died… without any of his dreams coming true. To die as his tool… that's much too cruel." The boy said, not yelling anymore.
"Kid. Not another word" Zabuza said, and he was crying too.
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But whatever we have here
Let's not screw it up
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"Kakashi… do me a favor?"
"What is it?"
"I want to… see… his face"
"Sure"
And as Kakashi carefully carried Zabuza to Haku's side, snow, like tears, began to fall from heaven.
My dear Haku… are you crying?
"…Thank you… Kakashi" Zabuza said. Then he turned to look at Haku, and brought his hand up to Haku's face, broken bones or no.
You were at my side, right from the start… and I'm at yours at the end…
"If I could… If I were able… I would want to go… to the same place… on the other side… as you"
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And someday… someday…
Someday my prince will come
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"…But still… Kakashi-sensei…" Sakura asked, obviously bothered.
"Hmm-?"
"… I can't help wondering. Were those two right about how a ninja should be?"
"A shinobi shouldn't b concerned with the reason for her own existence… it is important merely that we exist asa tool for our homeland to use in whatever way they need, That's as true for us in Konohagakure as it is for ninja anywhere else." Kakashi explained cheerfully.
"Is that really what becoming a full fledged ninja's gonna be about? I don't like the sound of it!"
"Do you really feel that way, Kakashi-sensei?"
"Welllllllllll… No. And that's why all we ninja live with that ideal bubbling beneath the surface of our minds, disturbing us." Kakashi then added "… like it did Zabuza… And the boy…"
Naruto was quiet for a moment, and then said "That's it, I've made up my mind! I am going to create my own nindo- my own ninja path. My own destiny!"
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And I'll know, I'll know
That it's okay not to run
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"Oi! Kakashi-sensei!" Kakashi looks up from the latest in the Icha Icha collection to see his students' children running towards him.
"Yo, Karin, Yo Haru" Kakashi says. The girl and boy greet him in turn.
"Otto-san didn't tell me that you were picking us up today" Haru says.
"Yeah, well, your dad is a busy man" Kakashi replies "He's busy taking missions behind enemy lines and making your mom worry" After all, Team 7 hasn't changed that much.
The boy's green eyes reflect faint confusion, but he nods anyway. Kakashi ruffles Haru's black hair.
"Guess what, Kakashi-sensei!" Karin says excitedly, as energetic as her father ever was, despite looking more like her dark haired mother. "We learned about snow maidens today!"
"Did you now?" Kakashi asks, thinking that he was going to stop believing in coincidence all together. Today is the anniversary, after all.
"Yep! Iruka–sensei told us about them because we're learning about Yuki no Kuni. He said that they're all beautiful girls who cry to make it snow" his namesake (Naruto had asked Kakashi to supply the name for his third child, with the rule that it had "Ka" in it) replies.
"You know, not all snow maidens are girls" Kakashi informs her.
"How do you know?" Karin asks, sticking out her tongue.
"Because, I knew a snow maiden once"
"Nuh uh. They're mythi… mythi… mythical creatures."
"Oh yes I did. He was from Mizu no Kuni, but he was living in Nami no Kuni." Kakashi says "With an Oni"
"Yeah right, Kakashi-sensei. We're not kids anymore, right, Haru?" she asks her companion.
"Well… I still wanna know what happened to the snow maiden" Haru says.
"He doesn't live there anymore. He and his Oni went somewhere else" Kakashi says. "Don't you wonder why it doesn't ever snow in Nami anymore?"
"No." Karin says "We live in Konoha."
"Well, you need to learn about other places if you're gonna be Hokage, right?" Kakashi says, naming her frequently mentioned dream as he ruffles her dark blue hair. "Someday you'll understand"
And he watches Naruto's little girl take her friend's hand, and he thinks Someday, I'm going to have to tell them the whole story but someday is not today, and more importantly, he thinks he'll take them by the memorial stone this afternoon. If Karin does become Hokage someday, she had damn well better know the price.
Do you have a precious person?
X
X
X
So there it is. I depressed myself while writing this, but I think it was worth it. I struggled a bit with the part at the end, but as my sister said "It wraps things up". Haru is Sakura and Sasuke's son, and Karin is Naruto's daughter (with Hinata). Just in case that was confusing.
Happy Birthday, Zabuza.